Kirstie Alley's Weight-Loss Program Is Not A Front For Scientology
Scientology's answer to your crazy aunt who bitches how she needs to loser her lonjas before biting into a Zinger was on Today this morning to whore out her new reality show about being fat and her new weight-loss program called Organic Liaisons. Fun fact: "Organic Liaisons" is also what Gwyneth Paltrow calls masturbation.
Organic Liaisons has been accused of being a front for Scientology, because their corporate office is based in Clearwater, FL, which is where the Church of Suri's High Heels is also based. Also several high-ranking Scientology members sit on the board of Organic Liaisons.
This morning, Meredith Vieira asked Kristie if it was true that L. Ron Hubbard's frozen jizz juice is the secret ingredient in Organic Liaisons. Kirstie said, "It's such bullshit. It’s not true. It’s not true. I’m the top executive. The address in Clearwater is my accountant, and he’s a Scientology Jew. I don’t know what to say to it.” Kirsie went on to deny that Scientology gets a cut of Organic Liaisons' profits, “No, they don’t. I’m way too cheap to do that."
You know what Meredith forgot to ask? She forgot to ask Kirstie for proof that Organic Liaisons actually works! I'm sure it will make you feel less GLIB, but will it melt your chunk?! Maybe I'm on too many anti-depressants, but Kirstie looks like she's been eating donut pills, not weight-loss pills. Bitch is still fat!
I mean, taking weight-loss advice from Kirstie Alley is like taking classes in tact and etiquette from Rielle Hunter.
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Instead of spending $1700 per year on this manatee's weight loss program, just post a picture of her on your fridge and watch the pounds melt away!
of course not ... Scientology is a front for Kristie's weight loss program
Well....at least she's not scary like Cruise??
Idk. She is obviously lying through her teeth about the $cieno connection, but I don't totally hate her. In fact, I might actually like her if she weren't a brainwashed cult member. I find the whole thing so sad b/c she doesn't seem like a bad person to me...just someone who got sucked in. I can relate, as a former Born Again Fundie.
There are actually Buddhist Christians b/c Buddhism is a philosophy. But Scieno Jews? Um...no.
Would anyone take any advice from Kirstie Alley about weight loss? Bitch please... go eat a dozen cream puffs, strap yourself to a machine and tell yourself your ass is not stalking you. I do Cheryl Burke's (aka: Mop Head), disco abs workout every morning and march my ass a few miles around the island just so I don't look like Kirstie Alley.
What a delusional cunt.
Submitted by carefreea on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 12:56pm.
I'm more confused by the notion of a Scientologist Jew :S
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What? So you're saying there's no space alien Jews trapped in a volcano (or whatever?)...Oh, well then I suppose you doubt there's...I don't know...GAY Scientologists...Oh wait...Oh wait again...My point is Scientology does not discriminate...as long as you have an ASSLOAD of cash....and a beard on hand...
And my ass shit ain't goin' to that crazy cult!!! Don't they essentially tithe...or worse? Where is this whore's 'donations' to her cult coming from? Yeah, not acting or cover shots...Bitch done et all that Jenny Craig money, you know she did...Naw, whores don't go there...
Bitches want to lose weight, here's what you do: Eat less and exercise more...You don't wanna do that? Then you gonna be fat...Simple as that.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Toonkinstein on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 4:21pm.
When she was svelte, I considered Kirstie one of the most beautiful actresses out there...
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Krusty was NEVER svelte...she was a coke addict... you can't believe everything you see..
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Whether it was from coke or not, she was actually pretty thin.
♥ Threadkilla!
Heterosexuality is not normal. It's just common.
~ Dorothy Parker
this chick is certifiable.
now i want to watch the show, before i was just meh.
Wait, didn't we have the story of the moo-cow trying to reach 1000 pounds YESTERDAY?
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"You sir, have the charisma of a damp rag and the appearance of a low-grade bank clerk."
Wouldn't a Scientology Jew be an oxymoron? How can you be a Scientologist AND a Jew?
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
When she was svelte, I considered Kirstie one of the most beautiful actresses out there...
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Krusty was NEVER svelte...she was a coke addict... you can't believe everything you see..
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"Escandalo! Okay, I'm totally making shit up." ~ M.K. 08/31/09
I should get a sample and take it to the lab I work at give the once over on the "ingredients"...Ingredient #1 BARLEY
Fuck, they will make her sit in a sauna and drink oil until she shits her self half to death and then the claims will say..."it works better then Jenny Craig...but she will say "works better then any other weight loss plan!!" *wink wink Jenny Craig nudge nudge*
Silly Krusty Alley..It's such bullshit. It’s not true. It’s not true!!!
...still think I smell barley water...
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"Escandalo! Okay, I'm totally making shit up." ~ M.K. 08/31/09
Dear Kirstie:
Let GO of the Taco Bell bean burrito when you speak. It's mumbling your babble!
Plus, you have been trying to lose the same 97 pounds for most of the last damn decade. If it hasn't happened yet...it probably will NOT.
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http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe for "Heaux Confessionals©", delivered to your inbox and other holes:
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What the hell? If he problem is not hunger then why take a pill that helps with hunger?
When she was svelte, I considered Kirstie one of the most beautiful actresses out there...but it wasn't just the weight...something seems to have changed inside her...that being said, this interview didn't scare me at all so that's good:)
♥ Threadkilla!
Heterosexuality is not normal. It's just common.
~ Dorothy Parker
Why is anyone interested in this fat old sow?
Did she have a recent facelift?
Sometimes I wanna slap this bitch but she is a good example of someone that knows how to make money off her weight. Fat bitches take notes. Let's just say she's going broke, then all she has to do is eat like Java the Hut and make a new deal with Jenny Craig or Weight Watchers. That's how it's done.
scientology jew? wtf is that?
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what you gonna do? tell mom and dad I put your dick sucking list on facebook?” – "i love facebook like you love cock..."
What the hell is a "Scientology Jew"????? Ummm, if homeboy believes the Torah (first 5 books of the Bible to us Christians) is true, then you CANNOT believe in the whole alien souls dropped in volcanoes and possessing humans schtick. It's not like believing in evolution where it's plausible to believe both (note, the Bible is not the entire story of humankind--you can't fit that in one book). This is a whole other ball of wax. I hate how scienos sell their cult with a bunch of freakin' lies. If your "religion" was so damn great, you wouldn't have to LIE ALL THE TIME!!! The one true God will have no Xenus above Him!
Ok, enough pontificating, I need some liquor.
-LOVE ANDERSON
peopleperson - LOL - Yeah I saw that one recently also. She's one of their main PR people. Lovely.
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Declaration of Compassion:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCqnmzSyyvI&feature=related
@onthefringe
This is one of my personal "what are your crimes" favorites:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocw90W44Boc&feature=related
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LOL! FOOLS! I have 238 ALTS on this site. There is only one other person on this site and it is you! ~ jazzfish_77
They sent out the memo to be totally underground now. No one admits to be a scientolo or a front. Creepy clandestine cult!
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LOL! FOOLS! I have 238 ALTS on this site. There is only one other person on this site and it is you! ~ jazzfish_77
One of the best "what are your crimes" videos. Really shows the crazy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pPol_m8wm8Y
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Declaration of Compassion:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCqnmzSyyvI&feature=related
Okay, I can sympathize about her with her weight and how it fluctuates (sp?) up and down constantly. She is one of those people with an addictive personality and if it's not food it is something else. Maybe she needs to get addicted to exercise, I dunno. Or compulsed with it. Whichever.
As far as scientology goes, fuck that shit. Fuck all cults. I am curious about them though.
Submitted by EvilShoe on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 2:17pm.
Submitted by squiggles on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 1:26pm.
No they don't. They only talk about their own. I grew up in the Clearwater area, they're creepy!
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What are your crimes, Shoe?
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LOL! FOOLS! I have 238 ALTS on this site. There is only one other person on this site and it is you! ~ jazzfish_77
Submitted by TexnDoc on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 2:14pm.
Rielle Hunter I read yesterday has hand held video footage of the sleeziest politician in history between her legs at her vajayjay - and apparently mugging for the camera whilst munching away. This woman is a Goddess who had rid the world of an Evil.
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I never liked that dude simply based on his personality. There was just something about him. (not that most if not all politicians cheat)
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LOL! FOOLS! I have 238 ALTS on this site. There is only one other person on this site and it is you! ~ jazzfish_77
Submitted by squiggles on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 1:26pm.
No they don't. They only talk about their own. I grew up in the Clearwater area, they're creepy!
@kittycatastrophe
Oh yeah. You definitely need to be a little bit of a masochist to stay in that line of work.
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LOL! FOOLS! I have 238 ALTS on this site. There is only one other person on this site and it is you! ~ jazzfish_77
Rielle Hunter I read yesterday has hand held video footage of the sleeziest politician in history between her legs at her vajayjay - and apparently mugging for the camera whilst munching away. This woman is a Goddess who had rid the world of an Evil.
Too bad she can't bull-shit the pounds off of her ass.
She's full of cellulite & hot air.
She is an evil woman.
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"I am going to rock myself in a corner in my Slanket now." - Plecostomus
@peopleperson:
I think the entertainment industry can be ego and soul destroying, especially when you go from being the smartest and the prettiest to being 1 of 500 smart and pretty people. Combine new to big city living with non-stop competition, even to work behind the scenes, and you become ripe for the picking. All of my favorite bosses are SP's and proud of it.
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I am not a pussy.
Is a Scientologist Jew more covetous or less covetous?
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Hey baby! Did heaven lose a star? 'cause you've got niiiiiiice cans...
Kirstie's accountant is a Scientology Jew....
how is that comforting that Scientolgy isn't involved in her new company???
It sounds anti-semetic to me...like "Don't worry, the Jew is just an accountant taking care of the money...he's harmless"
geesh Kirstie...maybe you should focus on keeping food IN your mouth 24/7 so you dont say such stupid shit
@kittycatastrophe
You're an SP??? ;-)
Oh my gawd those people are so fucked up! I'm glad the parents stepped in and cut that shit off. I don't understand how people get into it. I should get a sauna room, vitamins, a crude lie-detector test and start my own "religion" (that bilks ppl out of money)
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LOL! FOOLS! I have 238 ALTS on this site. There is only one other person on this site and it is you! ~ jazzfish_77
Submitted by dementa on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 12:43pm.
I'm pretty sure there's no such thing as a Scientology Jew, like there's no such thing as a Scientology Christian or a Scientology Muslim. It's like referring to someone as a "Jew Muslim" or a "Christian Hindu."
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I and others have covered this ground but that type of description is fine for the Scientolos. The other religions may have a problem with it though ;-).
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LOL! FOOLS! I have 238 ALTS on this site. There is only one other person on this site and it is you! ~ jazzfish_77
@peopleperson:
It's a total fucking scam and the parents had to step in to pay off debt and cut said relative off financially because of the money that was being bled. Oh, and said relative works behind the scenes in the entertainment industry which is why they were noticed in the first place. I don't know too much because I've earned my "suppressive" badge due to my train/employment background,lol.
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I am not a pussy.
Submitted by Hekki on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 12:41pm.
And in all seriousness, $cientology has other little offshoots that are a front for their fuckery.
There's one that promotes literacy in poor neighborhoods.
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I know that one. I think they throw Christianity and Muslim into the mix there too. I heard the guy who runs that is a con man.
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LOL! FOOLS! I have 238 ALTS on this site. There is only one other person on this site and it is you! ~ jazzfish_77
Submitted by squiggles on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 1:26pm.
I read somewhere that scientology is supposed to be compatible with other organized religion, so that you don't have to give up one for the other. It's just their way of claiming that CO$ isn't a cult and is innocuous...which, of course, it isn't. And I've never heard of people (famous ones, at least) who practice it plus another org. religion.
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I know of people who are Christian scientologists. I think it's just another way for them to recruit people. I mean, all they do is take vitamins, sit in saunas and have "auditing" sessions. But the thing I find interesting are the people's OTHER religions. I mean, isn't it blasphemous to worship false idols, etc.? Forgive me, I am ignorant about theology.
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LOL! FOOLS! I have 238 ALTS on this site. There is only one other person on this site and it is you! ~ jazzfish_77
Submitted by kittycatastrophe on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 1:37pm.
$cientologists have been saying you can be two religions for a few years now. That's how they hooked a relative in about 5-6 years ago. She's been broke as a joke ever since.
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Yeah, that's because scientology IS NOT A RELIGION. It's a friggen mlm cult all out for the dolla dolla bills y'all. I'm sorry for your relative.
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LOL! FOOLS! I have 238 ALTS on this site. There is only one other person on this site and it is you! ~ jazzfish_77
I think maybe she means he is a Scientolgist and a Jew. Like he is culturally a Jew and his "religion" is Co$.
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I believe it's the plural form, indicating more than one. Do you want me to conjugate that for you, Pop? Do you know what conjugate means, Dad?
$cientologists have been saying you can be two religions for a few years now. That's how they hooked a relative in about 5-6 years ago. She's been broke as a joke ever since.
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I am not a pussy.
Kirstie, quit with the dieting advice because you SUCK at it.
And believe whatever you want, but quit trying to convince the rest of the world it's rational and remotely sane.
Doesn't Kirstie also have a new tv show coming out with some theme about being fat or losing weight? How many chances are tv/cable company execs gonna give this woman while she's still the size of a cow? She's already done Fat Actress ffs, so give the viewing public a break already. Kirstie Alley is tiring just listening to her flapjaw about being a fattie and what she's gonna do about it. STFU & lose the damn weight already. Or not, and just be happy as a cow.
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"OMFG! What kind of site are you on?" - David Letterman's Psych major sister, 1/7/10
I think the way she said NO was a YES. And I thought she looked a bit thinner than her last appearance on Oprah in the past year.
I want to know where the hell I can get some donut pills!
I read somewhere that scientology is supposed to be compatible with other organized religion, so that you don't have to give up one for the other. It's just their way of claiming that CO$ isn't a cult and is innocuous...which, of course, it isn't. And I've never heard of people (famous ones, at least) who practice it plus another org. religion.
Kirstie offers her own high position in the company as proof that it's NOT run by scientologists. Um, wha?!?!
I heard her on XM flapping her cud about this shit. The whole time I'll I could picture was jizz leaking out of Tommy Girl's ass lips. Sounds the same.
Writing a book, hippie? Why don't you go listen to some folk music and give me a break!
I remember when this fatso used to be one of the hottest bitches in Hollywood.
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Hey baby! Did heaven lose a star? 'cause you've got niiiiiiice cans...
Submitted by Pamela on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 1:11pm.
One of the greatest mysteries in life is why do fat people always want to give you diet advice? That along with why do people with stinky breath always want to tell you a secret?
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OMG that is effin funny. lolololol
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"gobble a bowl of dicks" submitted by HOTNEY
Submitted by BarbadoSlim on Tue, 03/16/2010 - 12:58pm.
And yeah what IS a Scientology Jew anyway? Is it like a prostitution whore?
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I was wondering the same thing. PROSTITUTION WHORE!
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"I truly don't like you as a person. Can't one human being not like another human being? Can't we all just not get along?"