Friday, March 19th 2010
JLo Is Going Overboard In More Ways Than One
JLo's career has pretty much fallen overboard, and now she's taking a gem from the 80s with it! The Hollywood Reporter (via Coming Soon) is saying that JLo will star in a remake of the 1987 Goldie Hawn/Kurt Russell movie Overboard.
JLo will play the role of a stuck-up, "short fat slut" socialite who falls off her yacht, gets a case of amnesia and is taken in by a hillbilly carpenter with ulterior motives. JLo's ass and ego will share the role of the yacht.
You know, I'd be okay with this if it was a reality show based on Overboard and we got to watch as someone pushed JLo off a boat. Like for real. But sadly, it isn't so let's all scream "NOOOOO!!" as we throw ourselves off the side.
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Puerto Ricans have Yachts?
Tell me which moron is actually going to put the money for this mess staring JHO of all people?
Isnt she the kiss of death on everything aside from the fact the the original doesnt need to be fucked around with...
"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"
Way to RUIN a CLASSIC. WTF can't Hollywood come up with any original ideas anymore?
"I'm still tacky."
To Roddy McDowell, when he offers to blow Joanna's toenails dry on the yacht. My last quote, I promise.
Not since the HIDEOUS remake of "The Stepford Wives" have I been such a crabapple.
This shit really pisses me off. For real...
"One doesn't SHOVE the pate down Shittake's throat. One places it on his tongue--they DO have dogs in Sweden, don't they?"
Is there anyway we can protest the remake? A petition or something? How can we empower ourselves?
She can't act. I feel real sorry for the kids that will have to act alongside her and also pretend to be her children. NO to remake!
Remake a film that in its original form was a
total crackup,laugh,cacklefest?
WOT THE FUCK FOR????
WHAT IS IT WITH THIS CONSTANT NEED TO
REMAKE?...
BARBARELLA WAS RUMOURED TO BE ON THE REMAKE
MERRY GO ROUND SEVERAL YEARS AGO TOO.I SWEAR
TO GOD IF EVER BARBARELLA WAS REMADE I'D GO
TOTALLY,UTTERLY,COMPLETELY POSTAL!...THERE
WAS ONLY ONE CINEMATIC BARBARELLA & IT'S
LA FONDA...NOT BARRYMORE,HUDSON,RICHARDS
BECKINSALE,BERKINSTOCK,OR THAT CUNT FOX
NO!...NO!...ABSOFUCKINGLUTLEY OVER MY DEAD
BODY,COME ANY CLOSER & I'LL BLOW YOU TO KINGDOM
COME...*****NNNNNNNOOOOOO*****
Ahhhh,that's better....now where did I put my
pipe?
Tevness...
God damn Hollywood is L-A-Z-Y! Stop remaking, do something new for cripes sake. Oh wait I forgot, we are talking about Hollywood here...meh...
Noooooooooooooooo! Overboard is one of my fave movies ever! Definately my fave rom com and they are going to ruin it with j lo? Can someone just nuke hollywood? Seriously. Nuke them all off the planet, the loser producers and directors and the writers that apparantly cannot really write anything original and all the dumb starlets that cannot act and only excel in starving themselves. OY!
Lane, I have been going to this high school for 7 years. I'm no dummy.
Apparently Hollyweird hasn't woken up to the fact that JLo CAN'T ACT. She can't sing either, for chrissakes.
this news isn't even funny...jlo needs to raise those babies and stop fucking with me...
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what you gonna do? tell mom and dad I put your dick sucking list on facebook?” – "i love facebook like you love cock..."
There is only one Joanna/Annie and it is Goldie Hawn.
I loved that movie as a kid. I watched it recently and the acting is SOOOOOO bad.
JLO in a remake of some half-ass 80's cheese.
Yeah muh-fucka' I'll be gettin' the very first ticket sold... belee'dat.
*COUGHLOLCOUGH
Kurt Russell for President though, for real.
can't we start a petition? Doesn't Jlo have an original movie scripts to act horribly in? This movie is an 80s classic? Why?????
Can't we pay her money NOT to make the movie?
How much does she make per movie these days? All we need is 10 million people to give a dollar?
Don't do it Jlo! Don't do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Blech
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If I wanted something covered in cum and gold eyeshadow I'd steal Adam Lambert's hoody. --Helen Killer @ Regretsy
I ALMOST had to wait!! Joanna Stayton
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Dale Doback: Okay, here's the shot out of the cannon: Oprah, Barbara Walters, your wife. You gotta fuck one, marry one, kill one, go!
well when they say they are redoing captin ron with some douche bag of an actor like ryan reynolds..then i'll be even more upset..
*le sigh* kurt russell in a speedo...
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I love that movie! Doesn't j-blow have kids to take care of?
WTFOMGLOL, and the sad part is that nobody's said that to JeLo in real life because it's SO true.
"A falsetto child?"
"Listen to me, medical people!"
Love, love, love this movie. I am pretty sure my parents still have the VHS because we rented it in 1988 or so and never returned it. *Shameface*
I have always had a soft(and sometimes hard) spot in my heart for Goldie Hawn. She's that MILF you could hang out with and share a spliff with.
But then again, her daughter is no match for her and that hasn't managed to stop her ass from ruining film after film after film.
Which brings us to JHo, who is an entirely different story!
I predict travesty all around.
And what the fuck is Marc Anthony doing in this?
Meth in the woods as a theme?
Hmmm
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what is the point in redoing this movie??? it was so great the first time around. goldie hawn was awesome and perfect in it.
JLo is like Julia Roberts, just annoying and not that talented.
** http://feministguidetohollywood.blogspot.com **
JLo is NO Goldie Hawn. Goldie Hawn is down to earth and cool. Years I go, I was at the hot Springs pool in Glenwood Springs, Colorado. She, Kurt Russell and a bunch of teen aged boys (I am assuming their son and friends of his) were there. They were super low key, no diva stuff, acted like any other family enjoying the pool.
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www.adorned4u.com
NO!!!! I SWEAR IF SHE DOES THIS MOVIE I WILL JUST DIE...THAT IS MY ALL TIME FAVORITE 80's MOVIE...GOOD LORD, NOONE CAN DO GOLDIE LIKE GOLDIE...WHY CAN'T THIS NO TALENT HO JUST DIS THE FUCK APPEAR...
Submitted by Mrs. Voorhees on Fri, 03/19/2010 - 12:26pm.
i L-O-V-E that scene in "overboard" where Katherine Helmond is lying in bed and tells Joanna, "Darling, if you HAVE a baby--you won't BE the baby anymore." Fucking classic.
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No one can top Katherine Helmond. NO ONE.
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Life's a jest, and all things show it/I thought so once, but now I know it.
I thought the pic of Marc Anthony was actually a pic of Vince Vaughn....and sadly that's probably who will actually play Kurt Russell :( Boo Hiss!
www.myspace.com/lowenbad
Submitted by Albatross on Fri, 03/19/2010 - 12:17pm.
Oh, FUCK no! She is NOT going to ruin one of my favorite comedies. Fuck you, Jello! No one can play that part like Goldie Hawn. Fuck you!
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Fucking Amen!
they need to stop remaking movies! they are ruining them. : (
Good. Bad. I'm the guy with the gun.
-Ash
No, no, no, no, no. A thousand NOs!
Horseshit, FUKIN HORSESHIT!!!!!!
+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
"One Shot, One Shot!"
Ronnie 2, Townies 0
i L-O-V-E that scene in "overboard" where Katherine Helmond is lying in bed and tells Joanna, "Darling, if you HAVE a baby--you won't BE the baby anymore." Fucking classic.
My sis and I quote this movie all the time.
"Why don't we all smoke?"
"I don't smoke. I've never smoked. Why is everyone always trying to tell me what to do."
"Shut up, Grant. Nobody cares about your therapy."
"I had my nervous breakdown, and I didn't have therapy. I never had therapy."
The psychiatrist is hilarious. So is the mom.
"But, darling...if you have a baby, you won't *be* the baby anymore."
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"Close your eyes, not your mind
Let me into your soul"
JLo and Jennifer Anniston are over the hill and old news. JLo make some more babies. Jennifer, just go away and live in your ugly house and count your money.
Oh, FUCK no! She is NOT going to ruin one of my favorite comedies. Fuck you, Jello! No one can play that part like Goldie Hawn. Fuck you!
**********
"Close your eyes, not your mind
Let me into your soul"
NOOO!
Overboard's storyline is terrible and Goldie Hawn is treated like shit as Joanna. But the clothes and deco are Fabulous.
Guess they 'll keep the storyline and change the clothes.
I really like Goldie and Kurt, but OverBoard was not a very good movie. Why remake that??
Is Hollywood that hurting for movie ideas? I mean it wasn't even a big box office hit anyway. They should do a remake of Jlo's career. You might as well write the reviews now as I'm sure nobody needs to see this piece of shit to know it's going to suck donkey balls.
The only movie she was really good in was "Selena" about the killed Tejano singer. I watched it so many times.
She should go and raise her twins, redecorate her mansions and enjoy her $$$ millions.
I'm so sick of Hollywood doing remakes. Pretty soon they will be doing remakes of the remakes.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Another bomb for JLO. Nobody gives a shit about seeing her play a "socialite."
The first Overboard was good, stop messing with my childhood.
...My darling can't you see
My heart sounds just for you my dear...
"You know what your problem is?, You are so goddamn bored, you have to invent things to bitch about. You don't have a single thing to do on this earth, except for your hair. The closet was fine. you just needed something to fill up your useless, nail polishing, toe polishing, rich bitch, sun tanning days."
Best line in the whole movie. Kurt Russell was still quite a hunk back in them days.
"HEY Roy! Don't knock her up! "
Submitted by RedVelvetCake on Fri, 03/19/2010 - 11:41am.
Is the recession so bad that even creativity has been sucked out of Hollywood?
IMO it's probably more a case of audience demographic. More tickets are sold to kids or the 14-early 20s crowd who haven't seen any of the originals that are being remade, so these shit remakes are "new" to the audience. Look for "The Three Musketeers" starring the Jonas Bros. any day now.
"What's your motto?" "Kill everyone NOW"
They aren't mine...
I think I'd remember if I had 3 children..
FOUR honey, Don't forget little Joe!
*faints*
You jumped my bones the first night we met!
We did it on the first date?
Couldn't call it a date really, we just did it in the parking lot of the 7-Eleven
I'm a slut
What did you say?
Nothing
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"poor jacko, trying to struggle thru this world with one eye and the womenz just keep fucking his shit UP!" snowpiece 11/25/09
"I'd jack off to jack-in-the-hat if he was on the cover before her" Eddie
Because there are not enough DVDs in the bargain bin already.
WHAT! OH HELL NO!!! Leave Overboard alone! JHo!? FUCK THAT. I am irate. You cannot fuck with Overboard! Hollywood is PATHETIC.
I hope Dr Death kills this travesty before it takes off.
CATALINA!!!! Let it fuckin drown!!!!!!!!!!!
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Gerard, Jude, Robert Pattinson. Rowr.
Your heart is my pinata
Also - Rielle Hunter is one of the dancing girls on the boat. How do you remake THAT????
Submitted by TheBreakdown on Fri, 03/19/2010 - 11:36am.
Mr. Mercury:
Sure. Just send me a (post-dated) check.
Merci. I've already decided who will be the first to feel assmosis today when I finally get around to going in. You are a poet.
*adds extra zero to post-dated check*
"What's your motto?" "Kill everyone NOW"
Ahhhhh HELL NO!!
This is the second fucking travesty of the day.
Wait, I just remembered this is J-Ho, which means this idea will probably bomb before she even has a chance to shoot it.
I'm cool, as you were J-Ho.
"Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped"
- Elbert Hubbard