Sunday, March 21st 2010
Don't Hurt Anyone, Joe!
We all know that Joe Jonas' strut is a dangerous weapon that should be used with caution. When Joe's foot hits the streets, bitches hit the pavement. So I wonder how many gallons of soda came flying out of mouths and how many pairs of keys dropped when Joe Jonas stomped through Santa Monica Blvd. in West Hollywood yesterday. Joe probably didn't even notice a thing, because he was too busy singing "My smoothie brings all the hos to the yard" in his head.
Here's more of Joe Jonas and his trainer enjoying a cold beverage after working out at Muscle Beach. That is probably the gayest thing I've ever written (this minute).
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Jonas and Taylor Lautner will be a hot couple one day.
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"Oh you little bitch troll from hell!" -- Patsy Stone
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm joe jonas mmmmmmmmmmm
gay gay gay gay gay gay gay.
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
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*ridden hard*
THANKS SQUIGGLES for being the only one to respond to my question! The answer is Casa Grande, AZ and this is where I live. I was so shocked when I first heard that. The only other claim to fame we have here is that David Spade used to live here as a kid but don't think he was born here.
it doesn't get gayer than this
Gay or not, he still makes me get all tingly down there!
I thought that was Alan Thicke for a quick second.
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He kinda reminds me of Ron Jeremy, but...not as classy! - Submitted by david Letterman
Lovers for sure.
That is a quasi-couple!
Has someone notified Demi about this or can she not hear the screams because her ears are covered between the thighs of a gayelle?
And that trainer is not packing. His peen is just visible. Those are those shorts I avoid. They are very light material, and if the wind catches your peen/if you have to pee/if your wang is not properly adjusted before you put on the shorts... even the slightest perk up will be noticeable.
Hint: run it down, not across or don't wear them at all.
And true heauxz know exactly what I am talking about.
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http://www.myspace.com/triston
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I'm just a little disappointed that MK didn't make any mention of the trainer's basket.
Is the "trainer" that hung or is he sprouting a woody? The man is packing! What's HIS number? Wonder what they were doing before showing up for the ho stroll? We bitches want to know.
I'm just one of those gays that don't get the attraction to young guys - but I must say Joe does give me the tingles!
first we'll ogle the musclemen at the beach and then we'll head over to boystown (west hollywood) for a fruit smoothie.. gayest date ever.
the gayest man on earth would call this the gayest thing ever MK
His boyfriend is cute, at least. They look like a nice couple. Their body language is pure sex:)
♥ Threadkilla!
Heterosexuality is not normal. It's just common.
~ Dorothy Parker
What's funny is that I swore that Kevin (why do I know his name?) was the gay one, and that the Haylie Duff doppleganger was his beard.
So when is he coming out?
Joe "Hot Legs" Jonas
Whatever.
To paraphrase Avenue D...
"He's just a fag anyway!"
If I were a teenage girl these days, I'd definitely go clitty city up in this bitch!
These guys either wear skinny jeans so tight their nuts are cut off from circulation, or they wear jeans so damn baggy they are hanging at their damn knees.
Are females supposed to swoon over this fashion fuckery?!
I wouldn't!
And Joe is dressed like that gay neighbor you saw back in the day when he would go out and pick up the morning paper.
Yeah, when he bent over like that for the daily news you know he was a pro at it!
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http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe for "Heaux Confessionals©", delivered to your inbox and other holes:
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Bend and SNAP.
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 03/21/2010 - 3:24pm.
Is ANYONE else having issues with the way the site is loading???
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YES!! It's the biggest mess since this Jonas said he was straight.
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"little Kumquat and little Rameses (or whatever their names)"...MK
He's giving that straw some skills and a half.
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"In other news, the University of Color Me Surprised released a report today which states that water is indeed wet. Mind. Boggled" - Michael K, who else?
Submitted by Jana on Sun, 03/21/2010 - 6:30pm.
Muscle Beach is that the real name of the beach? How guido-ish and stupid sounding.
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The original Muscle Beach was near the Santa Monica piers. It was popular with bodybuilders (duh). I think Jack Lalanne started out there. Another Muscle Beach was started in the Venice Beach area.
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"Number 12 Looks Just Like You"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HaVo2xifmSw
Yup! That is pretty darn gay MK.
I hate the Jonas brothers...I'm watching 300 for the 300th time...I AM SPAAARTA!! *spits all over screen*
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any Jonas fan will tell you that Joe and his brothers often have problems keeping their erections on the down low,just do a research("jonas boner" on youtube) you'll be amazed at how many occasions you'll find, watching some episodes of their JONAS tv series myself I'll say they either enhance with socks or are pretty gifted,
as for his thighs well they seem to have slimmed down if you guys remember his 'put a ring on it' video his thighs were HUGE there:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UEZb39lgJHc
being a skinny guy I must admit I love fat ass and thighs(not overall fat body just meaty lower part) I wish i had some more meat myself,but it's impossible.
and someone once gave me these exact same shoes as a gift and they made my legs look totally unattractive but they do work for Joe though, and they were very comfortable for exercise and stuff,
the trainer obviously has a penis ,this Jonas brother does not. no matter what he wears there seems to be no bulge whatsoever. is he tucking it away ?
HA! And right in front of the Starbucks. That's the WeHo "Ho Stroll".
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It is possible blondes also prefer gentlemen. -Mamie Van Doren
Submitted by Miss Thang on Sun, 03/21/2010 - 6:20pm.
I don't care what anyone says. That is a gay man.
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My sentiments exactly. And I live up the street from here.
With those 80's glasses, the next outfit he will show up in is a neon "FRANKIE SAYS RELAX" shirt and parachute pants.
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It is possible blondes also prefer gentlemen. -Mamie Van Doren
Don't know if this kid is gay but I do know he has the hips & thighs of a woman who consumes a lot of dairy. Those skinny jeans are not for everyone.
Submitted by LisaRose on Sun, 03/21/2010 - 6:38pm.
QUIZ TIME!!! I live in the city that Joe Jonas was born in. Anybody know it?? I'll check back later to see who wins!
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Aren't they from Wyckoff, NJ? Only reason I know is b/c I grew up near there.
Also...he looks like the type who HAS to work out/have a trainer or he might pudge up a bit. Or maybe it's just b/c of his married brother that I feel he has pudge potential. I dunno.
That Trainer is kinda "Excited"... look the 1st picture
BTW... I think that black shoes are "Alpargatas" made it in Argetina
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"Quentin Tarantino makes me want to wipe my face off, because you know he spits out a saliva tsunami every time he talks" MK
I love people who work out and then consume a big-ass smoothie. Yes, some smoothies can be low in fat and calories, but most are calorie bombs. Of course, for most people "working out" is more a social exercise than anything else, so I guess it matters not.
QUIZ TIME!!! I live in the city that Joe Jonas was born in. Anybody know it?? I'll check back later to see who wins!
Btw... if Joe Jonas isn't gay then he should be! He's so cute! :)
or maybe that's the fitness center name. But why beach? Whatever, as you were.
Why does he wear all of his pants so tight? Gross. I could NEVER be a teenage girl in this day and age. I find the whole tight skinny jeans and/or feminine/feathery emo hair that is popular with young men these days to be SO UNATTRACTIVE. YUCK YUCK YUCK. Guys, there is NOTHING wrong with looking, acting, and dressing masculine. Really, it's ok!
Muscle Beach is that the real name of the beach? How guido-ish and stupid sounding.
Britney's legs are more manlier than his.
Submitted by Miss Thang on Sun, 03/21/2010 - 6:20pm.
I don't care what anyone says. That is a gay man.
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oooohhh, you're in TTRROOUUBBLLLEE!!... his boyfriend is SSOOO gonna come to your house and redecorate your livingroom!LOL!
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"And if I... show you my dark side
Will you still hold me, tonight?
And if I... open my heart to you
And show you my weak side
What would you do?"
I don't care what anyone says. That is a gay man.
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I like living this way. I like loving this way.
Fuck, his trainer looks like he gave Joe a smoothie up his ass.
LOL @ the tag "Spreading the Glitter"!
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"Close your eyes, not your mind
Let me into your soul"
If he wanted to wake me up in the morning, I'd let him!
Um, this picture pretty much PROVES his gheyness. Anyone who looks at this and doesn't think "flamer!" is in denial.
To the person who likes his shoes: I think those shoes are TOMS shoes. Don't quote me on that, though.
Are we really suppose to beleive he is banging Demi Lavota?
www.theinfamouslife.com <---CHECK OUT MY SITE!
Jojo the dog-faced boy.
Kevin is the one who got married. Joe is THIS ONE. And the youngest one is Nick whose hair is somewhat curly and whose eyebrows are not as out of control (and incidentally is a diabetic).
*renews subscription to Teen Beat*
♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣
"You sir, have the charisma of a damp rag and the appearance of a low-grade bank clerk."
Evil! I can totally see this Jonas kid doing that, esp in front of the church part!
(Hello by the way. Hope you're doing well, ES!)
He looks like Mr. Bean.
ESE,
;D
Submitted by zomay on Sun, 03/21/2010 - 5:07pm.
I fail big time telling these brothers apart. One just got married, one is curly haired? Three are gay? Who knows.
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simple solution.... just refer to any of them as "the untalented one".... or,(future outlook) you could go with "ya know, the guys that play go fish with the Hanson brothers on fridays"
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"And if I... show you my dark side
Will you still hold me, tonight?
And if I... open my heart to you
And show you my weak side
What would you do?"
So do you think Joe's hitting it with Muscle Mary there?
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I would not be surprised.