In Failed Whore News....
Markus, Nevada's first ever legal "prosti-dude", has packed up his peen and quit the ho business after only 2 months on the stroll. Markus started leasing his dick to lady customers at the Shady Lady Ranch back in January, but only 10 women got to leave a wad of cash on his nightstand. And 9 of those "women" were really male politicians trying to put one past Markus by dressing up in drag. I made that up (but it's probably true).
The owner of Shady Lane says that Markus leaving was a mutual decision. She says he has gone back to Los Angeles to do porn. That means you can catch him chewing man ass on Corbin Fisher very soon.
Shady Lane hasn't taken dick off the menu altogether, though. They have hired a dude hooker who goes by the name of Y. Yes, Y. The Y must stand for "Y The Fuck Would Ladies Pay For Dick When They Can Get It From Gerard Butler For Free?!"
Source: LVRJ
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I'm surprised he even had 10 women pay him. He's nasty looking. If a woman is going to pay for it, she wants her gigolo to look like Richard Gere, not Jon Cryer in Pretty in Pink.
something. is. wrong. with. his. face. that is all, thank you.
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Submitted by Mrs Patrick Campbell on Sun, 03/28/2010 - 1:52pm.
We hate all fish (aka "str8 females"). They are icky, stinky, yucky, cheap, stupid and no fun at all!..
If fish were forbidden by law to have sex with men it would be a Paradise!
________________________________________
so like, when you go to a restaurant do you let women touch your food? If you were in a hospital, would you let female doctors and nurses do whatever necessary for you to get well, or would you prefer to die? so.many.questions
okay, not really. you're just fucking mental.
Women don't pay for it... please. Sounds like some women on this thread have been listening to Beyonce and En Vogue.
Everybody knows a girl with low self esteem; she has a man that cheats on her a lot, drives her car, doesn't have a job, eats her food, etc. She's paying for her dick.
1.) Britney payed for K-fed. That fat fuck is well paid. That's how he got fat. He doesn't have to dance anymore either.
2.) Peaches Geldof probably buys the heroin for her sex romps. Free heroin is better than cash for some folks.
3.) Madonna pays for it for sure. It's part of her power thing that she does. It makes her feel more manly.
Straight for pay is not my male prostitute fantasy. Kthxbai.
PS. Dude is fugly. No way I'd pay money and risk being knocked up by that.
-------------------------------------------------
Are you gonna bark all day, little doggie, or are you you gonna bite?
Submitted by Manimal5 on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 10:04pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 7:43pm.
I MIGHT allow this youngish man to pay ME for sex. MAYBE.
It would have to be a lot of money.
Are you saying that everybody has a price?
******************************
Yes and no.
THIS youngish man, I MIGHT allow...but there are lots that couldn't even get it for cash - no matter how much. And THAT is why I'm a slut and not a whore.
♥ Threadkilla!
Why I love Daniel Tosh:"That skateboard hit him right in the vagina!"
""Marcus preferred the smell of mens organs and somehow women sensed this"""
LOL!!!!
We hate all fish (aka "str8 females"). They are icky, stinky, yucky, cheap, stupid and no fun at all!..
If fish were forbidden by law to have sex with men it would be a Paradise!
WTF? Us wimmin don't have to pay for dick. We can get all we want for free, 'cause most mens is horndawgs and if we indicate we want the wang bone, we will get the wang bone.
Plus, this man is abhorrent and fugly. I especially wouldn't pay for that.
♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣
"You sir, have the charisma of a damp rag and the appearance of a low-grade bank clerk."
Djimon Hounsou? I just googled it... are you serious? GROSS!!!!
Marcus preferred the smell of mens organs and somehow women sensed this.
Marcus faked his orgasms.
http://scallywagandvagabond.com/2010/03/the-terrible-demise-of-nevadas-p...
Well, I can understand a reason for male prostitutes in the world. Sometimes men suck in bed, come too quick, have the wrong size dicks (and I don't automatically mean too small. I dated a guy once who had a pretty small one, but for some reason he hit a spot that was juuuuuussss riiiite). Why you go to a pro is for professional expertise.
But for a woman to pay for sex, he also has to be beautiful. Get a Hugh Jackman lookalike who can shut up and not say anything stupid, eat pussy like a champ and has a nice fat cock. Bitches will pay. I knew poor downsy Markus wasn't gonna cut it the minute I saw him. Anybody can fuck a guy who looks like this! I wanna walk into a room and think I'm about to fuck Djimon Hounsou. Now THAT'S a moneymaker.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There's nothing like a little black pussay
What the fuck is wrong with this guy's face and why is he so greasy?
I will only pay for John Stamos and I hear he gave up whoring for money. Remember, he slept with Gloria Monty and her sister to get on "General Hospital." Men have slept with women for lots of stuff too, but it is not discussed as much as women doing it. Seriously though, this guy whore is fugly!
Maybe it's me, but I perfer foreigners who cannot speak English. Men always wreck my sexy times by speaking. If it is in a foreign language, I do not mind as much. That is why I only have sex with non-native English speakers.
Oh and I am a size queen with a vagina. I like them thick, not long.
Submitted by Miss Thang on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 7:37pm.
No woman is going to pay for dick because no woman is going to have sex with a man she knows doesn't find her desirable. It's just...not sexy. AT ALL.
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Damn, girl, you got it right!
-------------------------------
"I'm sorry you feel that way"
(May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the armpits of people who pretend to apologize by using this phrase)
Also this dude has the biggest DSL I've ever seen.
¥¥¥¥¥¥¥¥¥
You're 2 beers and a conversation away from getting your ass kicked...for real...so drink slow bitch.
Dude is ugly. Could pass for a woman. Looks like he couldn't form a complete sentence when speaking. May fall out of a chair at any given moment. I've got more but I'm tired...
¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤¤
You're 2 beers and a conversation away from getting your ass kicked...for real...so drink slow bitch.
Holy shit...THAT'S the guy they expected women to pay for???!!!
Delusional much?
I can't imagine most self-respecting queers paying for that, much less anything with a vagina.
@Speaky,
Kiss mahhh nipples.
hor.
*swings big willie*
Submitted by speakit on Sun, 03/28/2010 - 12:32am.
He wants me tho. I can see it in his commas.
__________________________
FRFLMAO..."...can see it in his commas..." fuck, that's funny.
OKAY FOR REALS, I';M OUT N OFF TO BED, DAMN,STOP BEING SO CRAZY FUNNY errybods! ♥ 'nites all
♥♥♥♥
Submitted by caprica six on Sun, 03/28/2010 - 12:27am.
Submitted by speakit on Sun, 03/28/2010 - 12:21am.
______________________________
Speaks, hon, forget about it. for real, are you upset about some random comment? who's this 'straps', just curious?
*edited*
___________________________________
ok i see speaks is fine now =D
_______________________________
oh strap/bambam is a know-it-all when he on't know shit.
He wants me tho. I can see it in his commas.
Submitted by speakit on Sun, 03/28/2010 - 12:21am.
______________________________
Speaks, hon, forget about it. for real, are you upset about some random comment? who's this 'straps', just curious?
*edited*
___________________________________
ok i see speaks is fine now =D
:P
omg I want to... I WANT TO.
Just throw me down and fuck me hard. Be rough strap. I like it like that.
Submitted by speakit on Sun, 03/28/2010 - 12:21am.
========================
Eat a dick. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! :p
I'M JUST GETTING MORE PISSED AT YOU THE MORE I THINK ABOUT IT STRAP. >:(
MOST WOMEN ARE MORE COMPLEX. WHAT TURNS MOST WOMEN ON ISN'T A GOTDAMN TUBE STEAK DANGLING BETWEEN THE LEGS, IT'S EMOTIONAL, MENTAL, AND VARIOUS OTHER STIMULI THAT LEADS TO A WOMAN WANTING THE TUBE STEAK, AND IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE AN 8 INCH STEAK TO BE A GOOD STEAK.
DAMMIT MEN SUCK.
I AM ON MY HIGH HORSE, I AM HONORABLE AND I AM SO MUCH BETTER THAN YOUUUUUU BECAUSE I'M A WOMAN.
>:(
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
AND MORE >:(
Strap, seriously, are you just trying to ruffle feathers? or is that your real opinion?
I'm all for basing opinions on life experience and I don't doubt that your opinion has validity from what you've encountered or observed, and I do know some women who fit your description but NOT the majority I personally know.
There has NEVER been a man in my entire life who wooed me because of his big dick.
though that might be tempting right about now since it's been months since I've had dick. I forgot what it looks like.
Submitted by bambam on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 2:59pm.
Submitted by Mrs Patrick Campbell on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 2:12pm.
The most hideous looking fish can walk into any (str8) bar in the world and within 5 minutes find at least some man (we would hate to see what he looks like) who will fuck her.
Alas, the same can not be said for us sisters!
===========================
Oh please. You're saying a man can't walk into any (str8) bar and not find some woman who'd fuck him???
Two words for you; Big dick. Women will spread like peanut butter for a big dick. Women aren't that complex. Seriously.
Sitting on that high horse like women are all honorable and shit. Get down and see that horse is packin and you'll give it a ride regardless what it looks like. You just won't tell anybody!!
bwahahahahaha!
_________________________________________________
Dude, what kind of whores do you hang around?
Yes, women are that complex.... okay, maybe not all women but *this* woman is.
Submitted by TITS on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 12:57pm
Where can you find them online? Are theyn the original ones or are they edited?
-----------------------------
He kinda reminds me of Ron Jeremy, but...not as classy! - Submitted by david Letterman
Submitted by z-listed on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 11:14pm.
He looks like Octomom's separated at birth twin brother!
---Bitch did you read my earlier comment? Octomom finally got a hair cut!
LOLZ
He looks like Octomom's separated at birth twin brother!
Even if you're monstrously ugly, you can still go to the bar or to the club and find some drunk dude to take home. No woman has to pay for sex.
Submitted by zantx915 on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 10:43pm.
Smaller peens are good for
Moistening stamps.
@zantx:
Steph, is that you?!
Smaller peens are good for anal...
I thought it went like, "and just sits on his broke ass"
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 7:43pm.
I MIGHT allow this youngish man to pay ME for sex. MAYBE.
It would have to be a lot of money.
Are you saying that everybody has a price?
************************************************
Two situations;
A man does little jobs for a woman. Both are upper middle aged, neither unattractive, both single. A professional relationship where familiarity breeds trust and informality. One day the man does a small job for the woman's business, transporting items between 2 locations, 2 or 3 hrs. work tops. She writes out a check for the job, waaaay more than reasonable. When asked if the amount was okay he replies "Okay? I could kiss you." Later on between snowstorms on the East Coast, the man vacays 2 wks in Orlando with the woman on her treat.
Is that paying for it?
Two neighbors, single, male and female. Families have a past connection, both people are caring for elderly parents. Woman's in need of a handyman on occasion, doesn't get a lot of help from her brothers. Man's handy around the house, his own house, just the way he likes it. Man doesn't have a car. Woman has a car and buys a new car, keeping the old one. One day during a chat the woman casually says she's been thinking of giving the man the old car. Man asks couldn't the brother use it? She says he's not trustworthy. Man offers to pay for the car then. Woman refuses, repeating she wants to give him her car.
Nothing is free in this day and time. What was she trying to do?
I'd rather deal with an oversized one than an itty bitty dicky. But to each her own...
************
I like living this way. I like loving this way.
Ziggy, you're a fool. The vagina is lubricated and it stretches to fit a larger penis. The anus is not lubricated and does not stretch. The prostate makes anal sex more pleasurable for men than it does for women. That said, you have a point, most women do not obsess over penis size. Big penises can be painful and they require too much time for the women to be "ready" and they are not comfortable for every position.
In what universe does a woman pay a man for dick? Yeah I know...echo chamber sentiment.
A gay male bordello would'nt work either because affluent gay trolls networked that whole scenario out back in the disco-era.NOBODY would drive into the outback to sample it.
@Tigerlilly:
O - he better have more than two bits if he wants to get wit me!
♫
A Scrub is a guy that thinks hes fine
And is also known as a Buster
Always thinkin' about what he wants
But he just sits on his behind(oh his, on his, on his)
So...
NO. I don't want your number
No. I don't wanna give you mine
And No. I don't wanna meet you nowhere
No. I don't want non o' yo time
No. I don't want no scrub:
A scrub is a guy that can't get no love from me
Hangin' out the passenger side
Of his best friend's ride
Trying to holla at me!
♥ Threadkilla!
"Fuck you AND your cheeseburger, motherfucker!"~ Texas Einstein.
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 7:43pm.
I MIGHT allow this youngish man to pay ME for sex. MAYBE.
It would have to be a lot of money.
***************************************
You two bit floozy!!!! ;-)
**********************************
Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
I MIGHT allow this youngish man to pay ME for sex. MAYBE.
It would have to be a lot of money.
♥ Threadkilla!
"Fuck you AND your cheeseburger, motherfucker!"~ Texas Einstein.
No woman is going to pay for dick because no woman is going to have sex with a man she knows doesn't find her desirable. It's just...not sexy. AT ALL.
************
I like living this way. I like loving this way.
Submitted by bambam on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 2:59pm.
Submitted by Mrs Patrick Campbell on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 2:12pm.
The most hideous looking fish can walk into any (str8) bar in the world and within 5 minutes find at least some man (we would hate to see what he looks like) who will fuck her.
Alas, the same can not be said for us sisters!
===========================
Oh please. You're saying a man can't walk into any (str8) bar and not find some woman who'd fuck him???
Two words for you; Big dick. Women will spread like peanut butter for a big dick. Women aren't that complex. Seriously.
Sitting on that high horse like women are all honorable and shit. Get down and see that horse is packin and you'll give it a ride regardless what it looks like. You just won't tell anybody!!
bwahahahahaha!
********************************
Not when you have a tiny 'giney...Big dick??? Hell no, no thanks, I'd rather sex NOT feel like giving birth....
But I digress...Any ho can get laid regardless of what you look like...If you have trouble, either your standards are too high or your chloroform isn't strong enough...Word.
**********************************
Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Jana on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 1:09pm.
Submitted by gia on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 1:07pm.
He is soooo unattractive!! Men will have sex with unattractive women, especially dirty ones...Being a woman I know if I am going to stoop so low as to pay for sex (which I wouldnt in a million years obviously) he better be incredibly hot & good looking.
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Kudos girlfriend. love your doggy pic too.
__________________________________________
Thank you! That is my Pitbull baby, Lucy, she is a sweetheart. Is that you in your pic?
Submitted by hotpocket on Sat, 03/27/2010 - 6:12pm.
Me thinks Ziggy doth protests too much. I like men on the larger end of average, but I'll take a nice average, which most men seem to be, according to my very unscientific studies on the subject.
***********************
Ok, I'm gonna go ahead and get all funky but I was thinking (becuz I have bizarre thoughts like this for no reason all the time - it's true) that it would be great to have two guys for sex - one for fucking and one for sucking (don't be shocked now, errbuddy does it!) cuz I'm not really as into gagging as I could hope to be for obvious reasons - and I know cuz I've had practice:)
I tend to like men on the larger side of average too but I realized, recently, that it's cuz I tend to like guys who are reminiscent of non-gender-specific pubic regions (ie. dicks, cunts, assholes), in general.
♥ Threadkilla!
"Fuck you AND your cheeseburger, motherfucker!"~ Texas Einstein.
He's gross, women don't need to pay for sex.
...My darling can't you see
My heart sounds just for you my dear...