The Rose Of The Kentucky Derby
It wouldn't be the Kentucky Derby without a tall crystal glass of sweet tea with just a hint of mint to give your tongue the tingles. Johnny Weir quenched the thirst of dry mouthed bitches when he hit the red carpet at the Kentucky Derby yesterday dressed like a fancy Bravo reality star (I'm looking at you, Dwight) going to a drag queen's funeral.
This is the first time in the history of the Kentucky Derby that the race ended early and a winner was not declared. That's because as soon all the horses spotted Johnny in the audience, they sprouted wings, pushed a crystal horn out of their heads and flew off towards the land of rainbows and glitter. Johnny freed them!
And the people who got to witness Johnny's glittery magic at work were: two assholian clowns, Larry Birkhead with Dannielynn, Fran Drescher, Joey Fat One, Jeff Lewis with Jenni, Vanessa Manilafolders with Nick Lachey, LOCKE!, Ugh Mario Lopez, Marisa Miller, Rebecca Romijn with Jerry O'Connell, Fred Willard and the woman with the best hat at the Derby.
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And whoever said Jonny was working the ho stroll, shut yer face! lol it's hard out there for a diva and he has to work it for his life to come out from under that nasty Evan (although I'm sure he'd rather be under him lol). And gotDAYUM I have eyebrow envy-his are flawless.
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"To be irreplaceable, you must be different" - Coco Chanel
Every time I think I find my favorite tag of MK’s, another one pops up! “Excuse my beauty” is my new favorite… lmao
Although “Why are you pulling my dick?” ranks up there too…
And God, I hate Asshole Simpson with a passion but I love her outfit here and I’m envious of it *hangs head in shame* Her worst fashion crime here is letting her troll doll husband out for the day looking like that…Oh and her busted ass nose. There! I redeemed myself by ragging on her.
Dannielynn is GORGEOUS. Larry and Anna Nicole made a very pretty baby.
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"To be irreplaceable, you must be different" - Coco Chanel
Asslee has no idea how brilliant she looks does she? Lol...anyway...I love Johnny Weir's hat, that's why they didn't even finish that race, it was ALL about his look and nothing more.
"Mah Boo releasing his inner cunt is my porn." MK
I love how Aslee Simpson always turns her head to the left. It's as if she's practiced this very pose 5,000 times in her bathroom mirror and it's the only angle in which she looks good.
Meh. I'd rather hang out at the public library...
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Let me introduce myself: I'm a misanthropic jerk with no friends and even my enemies are embarrassed they know me. I live in a vacuum of booze, cigarettes, fast food, celebrity and junk culture.
Why?
*********
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqnD11rjrtc
That's not Johnny Weir, it's Calvin Borel at the after party!
He should have ridden that horse in that getup.
Well. I'm sure he rode it later.
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"I can resist everything but temptation."
The Kentucky Derby has turned into a joke.
Medusa is a snake-headed beauty!
I wonder if Wentz got a bonner when he saw Weir in that hat?
Is it wrong that every time I see Johnny I think "YAAAAAAS!"
I laughed my ass off at the write-up to the head picture. Fuck, MK, you are the finesse. xD
-.-
The internet, where the men are real men,
the women are real men, and the children are the FBI.
It's great to see Birkhead with Dannielynn...she looks happy.
I really have no comment on the incredible in-your-face gayness of Weir...wait...that really wasn't a comment was it?
I want to see him guest judge on Project Runway. I swear if I saw him and Tim Gunn together it would be sensory overload for me! Attention whore aside, I love Johnny Weir!!
Nice to see ANS's daughter, she's cute.
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Curtsy, motherfuckers! MK
Weir's channeling this lady
http://images.google.fr/images?client=safari&rls=en&q=genevieve%20de%20f...
Notorious French madame who has been running Miss France contest in that hat for the past 95 years.
On another note, I am VERY UPSET that Countess Luann was not invited! Do these people have no class?
Johnny looks like a well-dressed pimp to me.
.
.
Running naked with my fairy wings thru the Derby infield..
TEAM JOHNNY
*toss glitter*
Gets tasered by security
-so worth it-
~*Lets go to my room pig!*~
Submitted by gelliott on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 1:48pm.
I've seen the show. I just think he'd be a better fit on Bravo.
I can't stand Johnny Weir. He is such an attention whore.
I'm not sure Anna Nicole would have approved of those sandals with that dress! :)
jt
I don't give a rat's ass about most of these idiots, but that Danielynn is one pretty little thang!
U GO GURL! *********************************************************************************************** What ain't no country I ever heard of, do they speak English in What? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DCrDuGyZ6FA
Are Asshole Simpson and her faux goth douche-bag husband still considered celebs? Ugh.
Asshole's nose job is failing. Time for a adjustment. May I recommend a baseball bat?
Johnny Weir is the gay son my Mother always wanted! She loves this boy...I do too, but I am a longtime fag hag. If I had known this glittery boy was going to be there I might have saddled up the pony and got my ass to Kentucky. Love Horse Racing!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SX2KzqM3qU
Johnny Weir is so adorable. If not for devotion to MK, I would happily be Johnny's fag hag.
Whenever I look at the Wentzes I break out in weird places. Does anyone else suffer from this problem?
Actually, Johnny already has a show..it's called Be Good Johnny Weir, and it airs on Sundance...the show premiered in January.
I had to look twice at the Joey Fatone picture, for a second there I thought it was Jakey in the chefs hat.
I want to know who does Ms Weir's eyebrows. They look hella better than mine.
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Submitted by Wood Dragon on Fri, 04/30/2010 - 8:50am.
May is National Masturbation Month! Give yourself a hand girl!
Submitted by stake_spike on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 1:20pm.
Bravo should give Johnny a show. He'd fit right in on that channel and it'd give us a chance to see more of him.
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And that's exactly what homegirl is looking for... he'll always be in Licecheck's shadow so now he has to resort to work the ho stroll, hoping to get noticed by anyone who can give him a show.
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"fuck you" is the new "thank you"
* shakes head - slams down another mint julep *
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Submitted by Wood Dragon on Fri, 04/30/2010 - 8:50am.
May is National Masturbation Month! Give yourself a hand girl!
Submitted by suze on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 1:17pm.
@ salacious
You KNOW they fought about it and had great MUS afterwards.
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Well, kudos to Larry because he seems to have nabbed a young piece.
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"fuck you" is the new "thank you"
OMG, Weir looks like Dorothy Spornak at one of the GG's various festivals. He'd probably take that as a compliment.
Bravo should give Johnny a show. He'd fit right in on that channel and it'd give us a chance to see more of him.
@ salacious
You KNOW they fought about it and had great MUS afterwards.
Tex Perkins.
Google him you dumb fuck!
Bitch is working that hat! (Johnny)
Ashlee and her 'husband' look like emo siblings and they look like idiots
www.theinfamouslife.com
www.twitter.com/so_infamous
Johnny Weir, Jeff Lewis, Larry Birkhead and his man, Pete Wentz and Mario Lopez.
Holy Pegasus, this is a pink event. Did the Derby start racing winged horses?
Submitted by FilthyBitch on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 12:52pm.
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 12:48pm.
It used to be about the breeding and the race itself. Wealthy people from old families were the only ones who attended.
Now? Pamela Anderson and Pete Wentz and Kid Rock.
No.
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You is confused. The Derby has always been about the glitz and glamour and celebs and over the top parties.
The day before the Derby is called Oaks day. Oaks day is the day you are describing. To locals and those in the industry it's just as big as the Derby. No celebs.
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For real? I didn't know that! Then I was right! Just off a day. LOLOLOLOL!
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I'm not a coke addict - I just like the way it smells.
http://www.modestneeds.org/
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 12:54pm.
ok, what is worse than this is that CHESTICA and KIM KARDASHIAN were at the WHITE HOUSE CORRRESPONDENTS' DINNER?
that is more of a WTF than this, IMO.
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Yeah, but they always kinda do that. They're decorations. Otherwise it's just a room filled with boring ugly people.
I guess the President likes badonkadonk;p
And they're kinda perfect - a hillbilly and a ay-rab.
♥ Threadkilla!
BRING BACK THE BOOT MOVES!~:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Boot%20Moves
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fv3AvJtWuUA
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 12:54pm.
ok, what is worse than this is that CHESTICA and KIM KARDASHIAN were at the WHITE HOUSE CORRRESPONDENTS' DINNER?
that is more of a WTF than this, IMO.
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well, it WAS a meeting of minds, right?... heeheehee!
there's a plan to this, i'm sure of it!!... let's just see how the economy turns around once it has lip gloss and butt implants!LOL!
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
ok...so i was doing laundry the other day and staring at my gas heater in the closet for some reason...and i noticed it says "Birkhead Co., Inc" so i start wondering if this has anything to do with the no talent ass-clown known as larry birkhead.
yesterday at the derby party i ask a friend and she confirms it, they're brothers BUT apparently they're twins who look nothing alike anymore because larry's had a ton of plastic surgery to look as douchey as he does. go figure.
also, it gives me the sads that so many of you haven't lost your voice screaming at a horse race yet. get on it bitches! horse racing is awesomeness~!
The Wentz family looks ridiculous.
I love Jeff Lewis. Everyone else sucks
Submitted by char on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 12:15pm.
Can Mario Lopez BE anymore of an attention whore????
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i still stand by and agree with this article...
http://www.cracked.com/blog/extra-mario-lopez-has-no-soul
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
i hate myself for saying this but i like ashlee simpsons dress
*hides in corner*
ok, what is worse than this is that CHESTICA and KIM KARDASHIAN were at the WHITE HOUSE CORRRESPONDENTS' DINNER?
that is more of a WTF than this, IMO.
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hear my name,take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand, walk beside me
I just need to say...
-Pearl Jam "Porch"
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 12:48pm.
It used to be about the breeding and the race itself. Wealthy people from old families were the only ones who attended.
Now? Pamela Anderson and Pete Wentz and Kid Rock.
No.
------------------------------
You is confused. The Derby has always been about the glitz and glamour and celebs and over the top parties.
The day before the Derby is called Oaks day. Oaks day is the day you are describing. To locals and those in the industry it's just as big as the Derby. No celebs.
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Doctors, soldiers, actors,lawyer,why not a fuker?? FUKER: the most fashionable and the most profitable work!!!!.... Spammer (probably EH or just a floozy)
Submitted by char on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 12:15pm.
Can Mario Lopez BE anymore of an attention whore????
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Only if he married Tila Tequila with blow-by-blow Twitter feed at the ER after a "serious traffic accident" involving paps he called himself.
@ onthefringe, suze
It looks like the photographer was trying to tell us something by taking that side shot. The guy in the pic sorta looks like "wtf are you doing?".
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Yes, completely intentional... Otherwise there's no point in taking that photo.
@Suze
You're right, awesome cuntface.
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"fuck you" is the new "thank you"
Was wondering when the fame-ho stroller pics of the Kentucky Derby would come out. Majorly underwhelming so far.
Submitted by salacious on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 12:42pm.
Submitted by Dog on Sun, 05/02/2010 - 12:30pm.
Another high class, dignified event that Hollywood has infested then ruined.
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What do you mean? I thought all these families who own any of the competing horses are a bunch of hot messes in their own right.
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It used to be about the breeding and the race itself. Wealthy people from old families were the only ones who attended.
Now? Pamela Anderson and Pete Wentz and Kid Rock.
No.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm not a coke addict - I just like the way it smells.
http://www.modestneeds.org/