It's The New Thing!
If an emotion called jealousy filled you up after reading about how Jeremy London's kidnappers forced him to smoke crack, then find yourself a car with a flat tire and hit the streets of Palm Springs, because apparently that kind of shit happens all the time! That's what Jeremy's wife Melissa seems to think anyway. In an interview with Radar, Melissa says that the nay-saying bitches out there should stop fucking them with the doubt stick, because it could happen to you. "PLEASE LET IT HAPPEN TO ME!!!" - Lindsay Lohan
Melissa, who was also kidnapped but later driven home after she started crying, says that she is scared for her life still, because the cops have yet to find two of the kidnapping crackhead makers. Brandon Adams was already arrested and charged with stealing an idea from an episode of Six Feet Under.
Melissa went on to pull all of our dicks, “This is real. Jeremy’s still in shock. He was very scared. People don’t understand that police only have one of the guys in custody. There are still two suspects out there. We’re very scared. I just hope this never happens to them. Police told us this is the new thing to do down here (Ed note: The police didn't tell them that)... rob people at gunpoint and make them do drugs so they won’t be reliable witnesses. It’s happening more and more.
We’re working with police to get the other two guys behind bars. Brandon Adams has already given a partial confession. As a woman and as a mother, I just want these people behind bars.”
Oh, and about that "mother" part. Melissa and Jeremy lost custody of their son Lyrik, because they named him Lyrik. No, they lost custody because of their addiction to the bad shit. Surprise, surprise.
This whole shit just keeps getting crazier and crazier. But what's even crazier is that this is my 4th post about Jeremy London! It's as if someone kidnapped me in the parking lot of a Jack in the Box and forced me to write about him over and over again. I wish they would force me to smoke crack instead. Oh, well. Maybe next time since this is the new thing.
And the detectives on this case should really investigate as to whether Melissa is in fact a plastic ventriloquist's dummy made by the makers of the Real Doll (SPOILER ALERT: She is).
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Miley Cyrus hits her 30's.
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"You gonna give me my car, or do I gotta go to your house and shove your dog's head down the toilet?" Repo Man
ahahaaa! LOVE the tags!
I see Brendan Frasier has shown Princess Fiona the wonders of SevYn NYne.
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"I can resist everything but temptation."
I was going to say, MK, who is this loser? And the scariest thing about this story is this chick's face with those super-sized cutlets in her cheeks.
That woman makes Heidi look natural. What a fugly mug!
Submitted by snideychick on Mon, 06/21/2010 - 4:10pm.
This guy looks like a beefier, greasier, uglier Brendon Fraser.
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He looks like a beefier, greasier, uglier Jason London. LOL
Ok, enough pontificating, I need some liquor.
-LOVE ANDERSON
why do we need to suffer the bloated misshapen faces of these 2 losers? are they the new Heidi and Spencer but older?
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"Chupa mi pinga"
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If these two are going to lie they could at least make it believable. No crackhead in their right mind would share much less force some stranger to smoke their stash. People have done some pretty fucked up things to get their hands on a rock. That is probably why these two shumucks lied.
I was at a party once when these chicks were smoking crack, and saw one girl think she had a huge rock and it was a piece of nail acrylic!
Coke was too good, I knew better though, I liked it too much. So not much cokey for me...
**Time flies when you're a drunken whore.** Michael K
Submitted by madam s. on Mon, 06/21/2010 - 3:47pm.
And mike mentioned something in a previous post, but that woman is straight out of the 70's and the guy is straight out of the early 80's. It's like they both just stepped out of time machines from about eight years apart.
Well, the last time I've seen her work was when she appeared on the cover of Hole's Live Through This and that was, what, 1993?
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_EUTJylBTtoo/S659juAySHI/AAAAAAAAAQw/FiPJ_KFLFu...
btw crack is not a group drug...it is not a hold hands and sing kumbaya type of drug. It is isolation and self-loathing and paranoia, and selfish beyond words...and it is the best fucking high in the world!! I smoked all over tarnation, different cities and different states and NEVER met a generous crackhead....there is no such creature. Nobody will ever force you to smoke there drug...no way no how...after about 15 years of on and off addiction to that monster, I know that for a fact. Not only are these assholes liars, they really are beyond butt ugly. Is this bitch he is married to for real, cause she truly looks like a chipmunk cheecked porn star from the early 70's....and he is just a greasy nasty piece of shit.
Snideychick sez:
This guy looks like a beefier, greasier, uglier Brendon Fraser.
"But what's even crazier is that this is my 4th post about Jeremy London! It's as if someone kidnapped me in the parking lot of a Jack in the Box and forced me to write about him over and over again."
MK, this Jeremy London caper is such a patently stupid story that at this point it can only be rescued by sharing YOUR abduction story...which I'm sure is a zillion times more interesting, and, *ahem*, credible...
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http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=cfa_1217968513
"Misfits aren't misfits among other misfits." ~Barry Manilow~
I suspect Lohan is going to be kidnapped for some hardcore liquor and drugs on her birthday weekend which is coming up.
And mike mentioned something in a previous post, but that woman is straight out of the 70's and the guy is straight out of the early 80's. It's like they both just stepped out of time machines from about eight years apart.
Has anyone ever met a generous Crackie??? Not even the most wealthy crackie is likely to share. The best you might get is second hand crackie smoke.
Nail me to my car... then I'll tell you who you are...Joe The Lion
She's just another one to scrawl on my Cheek Implants Never Look Good list. Why do women elect to do that shit to themselves? Even if your face is totally flat, it's got to look better than THAT.
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Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
Submitted by letinstar: "ooofah...this chick's FACE! is she supposed to considered hot?"
I think so. She has long "blonde" hair and looks like she'd give it up for after two cosmos. Doesn't that make women hot (in men's eyes)?
I am sick of this fuckery because these two are the fugliest people on the planet and I am sick of seeing their fugggggg faces!!!! Throw more crack at them and make them go away!!!!!
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Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 01/27/2010 - 5:42pm.
This site should be fun only. The petty shit fucks up my buzz.
You don't want that. Or maybe you do, you sucio fuck! MK
no, this girl makes the word "ugly"
seem like a compliment.
hideous beyond your wildest nightmare is more like it.
Dr. Drew just nutted in his khakis at the thought of these two appearing on one of his addict exploitation shows. That chick's face looks like it was carved out of wood and then covered in varnish,,,,,
lol!
so true.this girl is frigging ugly,over botoxed surgery drug face.
bitch please!!!!!
!
Jeremy London hasn't had his name appear in Google searches this much since...well probably never. Enjoy your brief blip in pop culture relevencey, cracky!
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Shiitake happens...
If this is true, then Melissa was fucking brilliant, have the perpetrators drive you to your house so they'll know where you live.
www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
www.petfinder.com - Enter your zip code & find pets available in your area for adoption.
*raises hand*
I have looked for it on disgusting surfaces. I am ashamed. But not so ashamed that I wouldnt do it again. If I weren't.. you know.. grown up.
M.E. I know the song and I apologize I didn't get it. ____________________________________________
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-Hat 04/27/2010
these psycho looking fucktards are about as believable as $cientology....but MK pure gold as usual...I wish someone would break my sobriety run (almost three years), and force me to smoke crack and drink...some fucktards have all the luck!! I wish they would stop piling on the bullshit and say, hell to the yeah, we puffed till our pants fell off and enjoyed it too...much better than all this fake ass drama and bullshit.
she looks like miss piggy
Even with a bright pro photographer's halogen flash, her eyes are uber dilated.
Koko - I was more of a loner when I got high. I didn't want to be around a bunch of jabbering idiots, I wanted to be alone and do whatever it was my mind wanted to do. Plus, if I did go out when I was high I ended up feeling paranoid that everyone knew. I'd tend to clench my jaw and it was noticable.
Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Mon, 06/21/2010 - 1:48pm.
I do not. Forgive me. my brain checked out on me as soon as it heard it was monday.
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*sigh*
Enjoy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UNq9gmY_Oz4
Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Mon, 06/21/2010 - 1:53pm.
Koko that is too funny. Everything is important when you're high on coke. It's funny to be in a room with people who are doing it and listen to them.. no one is listening to each other.
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I haven't done coke in about 7 (?) years but I remember those days of people just talking about whatever (usually themselves) and everyone just spouting off the most ridiculous stuff. The real fun comes when you find yourself looking for it on the floor, or random disgusting surfaces (like the toilet tank etc).
Koko that is too funny. Everything is important when you're high on coke. It's funny to be in a room with people who are doing it and listen to them.. no one is listening to each other.
Then you end up wanting some and joining in on the fun.
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*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-Hat 04/27/2010
Bitch looks like one of Larry's bimbo's from "Three's Company" circa 1977.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 06/21/2010 - 1:39pm.
Koko - those are the reasons I LOVED speed.
I was able to be wide awake, organized and focus on the task at hand for HOURS. My creative side overrode just about everything and when I wasn't working I was "creating" things, artwork, poems, building shelving units, entertainment centers, etc. Cleaning my house with a bleach and toothbrush. Damn. I was an effecient drug addict
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Dying laughing at the "building entertainment centers" thing because I remember doing that on coke. When I was moving out of my college house my mom came up to help me clean and I had a bunch of SHADY friends over to "help" and we all did coke in the shed while my poor mom was cleaning out the oven...she ended up buying everyone steaks/booze later because we were all such "good helpers"....
I do not. Forgive me. my brain checked out on me as soon as it heard it was monday.
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*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-Hat 04/27/2010
ooofah...this chick's FACE! is she supposed to considered hot?
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conscience off...dick on...
"Crack (cocaine) is a hell of a drug" ~ Rick James
Those are cheek implants right?
Koko - those are the reasons I LOVED speed.
I was able to be wide awake, organized and focus on the task at hand for HOURS. My creative side overrode just about everything and when I wasn't working I was "creating" things, artwork, poems, building shelving units, entertainment centers, etc. Cleaning my house with a bleach and toothbrush. Damn. I was an effecient drug addict.
DWM - didn't you get the song reference in my post?
Ewwwww
I guess I'm just a lazy person because I never got the "fun" of meth/crack...coke--yes. you can talk endlessly about every detail of your life and think it is important, but it seems like meth/crack just causes people to endlessly clean or do random projects. my style was always much more a blacking out drunk....
BUTTA FACE!!!
Blame it on the World Wide Web. These crack smoking kidnappers profile their marks first then go after these poor saps. The kidnappers don't want to force crack on anyone who doesn't actually like crack, it's just not their way. Oh Yeah, and who are these people and why are they relevant?
She looks like she's done some hardcore, monster c*ck, gangbang porn in her lifetime... no wonder the kidnappers dropped her off early
I'm taking M.E. to party with Madam Ex.. the other M.E.
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*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-Hat 04/27/2010
Submitted by little_rascal on Mon, 06/21/2010 - 1:19pm.
HAWT!
"motherfucker, I lick pits for a living" Sucky 12/14/2009
LawDog 03/15/2010 Leenie, LOL. I think we can all agree that I am the most important person ever
LawDog 04/15/2010 Who DOESN'T enjoy a gang bang? WTF
little_rascal!!!
I told you to leave that alone. suck&fuck has a better chance at hitting that!
Besides, Turkish Delight is highly overrated.
I import!
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AND police denial of that "epidemic"...
http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/06/cops-shoot-down-claim-jere...
Druggie says what???
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