Your Hourly Delusional Crackie Update
The Lindsay Lohan news just keeps pouring out like a bottle of E&J Gallo going into White Oprah's mouth at any given hour of the day. It's just like 2007's Our Lady of Cheetos Chronicles all over again! But Frapps and Cheetos have been replaced with Dilaudid and White Oprah's delusions. London the dog has been replaced with a SCRAM anklet. Gas stations have been replaced by Twitter. Adnan Ghalib's landing strip has been replaced by a FUCK U nail. The 5150 has been replaced by Judge Marsha's bitch slap. And Brit Brit's swamp thing weave has been replaced by.... Oh wait, well that didn't change.
Anyways, hold up your FUCK U 2 nail and let's get to this mess.
Lilo's Fuck U nail wasn't directed at Judge Marsh: LiLo Twatted last night that her FUCK U nail wasn't directed towards the court or anybody in particular. She barfed: "didn't we do our nails as a joke with our friend dc? it had nothing to do w/court.. it's an airbrush design from a stencil xx"
Anybody with a drop of reason swimming in their brains would know that if they have FUCK U on their nail, they should probably stick their hand between their nalgas while sitting in front of a judge. Or this bitch could've at least scrawled a "P" next to the "U." The judge and the public-at-large would've given her extra points for finally admitting the obvious.
LiLo called Judge Marsha a "fucking bitch": A source tells TMZ that right after Judge Marsha kicked Lilo in the bagina bone by sentencing her to jail, she called the judge a "fucking bitch."
I doubt Judge Marsha heard this since her ears were bombarded with a million voices declaring her their "fucking hero."
LiLo might have compared her situation to an Iranian woman who is probably going to be stoned to death: On her Twatter last night, LiLo linked to a Newsweek article about an Iranian woman who might be stoned to death for cheating on her man. LiLo Twatted: "No one shall be subjected to torture or to cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment." (Tell that to the people who watched I Know Who Killed Me).
I'm sure White Oprah is going to make a hundred copies of LiLo's ridiculous rant and hand that shit out in front of a Carvel on Long Island. Fudgie the Whale will never get away with torturing White Oprah by not giving her a free cake!
LiLo gets a visit from Kim Kardassian: Instead of showing up to her belated birthday party at some club in L.A. last night, LiLo stayed home and hung out with Kim Kardassian. Can we lock up Kim Kardassian for guilt by association? Someone should start a petition.
THE END (for now). I'm sure as soon as I hit the "publish" button somebody will post a story about how White Oprah is staging a tanning strike.
• 
Hello,everybody,the good shopping place,the new season approaching, click in. Let's facelift bar!
http://www.shoes2.us/
Air jordan(1-24)shoes $33
UGG BOOT $50
Nike shox(R4,NZ,OZ,TL1,TL2,TL3) $33
Handbags(Coach lv fendi d&g) $33
Tshirts (Polo ,ed hardy,lacoste) $16
Jean(True Religion,ed hardy,coogi) $30
Sunglasses(Oakey,coach,gucci,Armaini) $12
New era cap $9
Bikini (Ed hardy,polo) $18
FREE SHIPPING
Girls, find your man on TOTALLY FREE CLUB Men-Mart.com where women control the dating .
The Iranian woman story did it for me.
I don't care how many years in jail, rehab, under parent's supervision, whatever this girl is in for.
She's finished.
She will never, ever, learn.
She'll never die, either.
Cockroach.
_________________________________
"I can resist everything but temptation."
If she really feels that repressed, why doesn't she do something "useful" and martyr herself already?
-------------------------------------------------
Are you gonna bark all day, little doggie, or are you you gonna bite?
Give the bitch ten years next time!
Lilo is a dumbass. Doesn't she realize that Kim KardASSian is only sniffing around for deets that she can feed the weekly rags. That is the bitch's stock and trade! Give up info on her "friends" in exchange for favorble coverage for herself. Idiot. When you see the "Inside Lindsay's Hell" headlines next week, you'll know who the "inside source" is.
Ok, enough pontificating, I need some liquor.
-LOVE ANDERSON
White Oprah hired a lawyer who just passed the bar AND graduated from a non-accredited law school, the fabulous University of West Los Angeles -- no joke!
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 2:02pm.
NOT ONCE did she compare her situation to the Iranian woman's situation!
>It was more than once, Dina, honey.
Don't make up lies!
>Well, how ELSE to create them? Is there a more honest way?
(Is it just me, or does the expression "Don't make up lies!" sound familiar? Could swear I saw it on, like, Twitter.)
Strangely, I think it's the fact that these BloHoles are so fucking illiterate that bothers me most.
Blohan gave up twitter for Dlisted?
Damn.
YOU IN DANGER GIRL!
Dear Lindsay,
Just fucking die already.
Sincerely,
Earth
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 2:27pm.
And don't forget your entire family will be there as well!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yup and you and Lindsay will be cleaning up our shit and piss and doing whatever other menial task we need done! Cant wait to see you there!! Im sure we can find lots of fun stuff for you and your little friend to do! :)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
We actually have a HOHAN loon? FFS!
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 2:19pm.
Cunt Judge Marsha Revel will probably lose her "appeal" when she tries to get into heaven.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Well at least she will have you and Lindsay to keep her company!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
Submitted by Goldshift on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 2:09pm
No shit someone give me this dentist number! I had all for taken out at once and this ass not only broke one on the way out he also broke another back tooth in the process! All I got was some shitty old codiene which didnt do dick!
Then I got some lovely dry socket a few days later and this jack ass left a piece of bone in my gums but kept insisting it was a piece of food although even when he took it out it clearly was a piece of tooth!
Even the nurse said when he walked out it was, Im sure because he was a dick to work for walking around like he was gods gift to women with his crooked hair piece and his piss poor attempt at being funny/flirty! Fuck that dude!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
Cunt Judge Marsha Revel will probably lose her "appeal" when she tries to get into heaven.
Enjoy Hell Marsha Cunt Revel!!!!
TEAM LOONS!
"motherfucker, I lick pits for a living" Sucky 12/14/2009
LawDog 03/15/2010 Leenie, LOL. I think we can all agree that I am the most important person ever
LawDog 04/15/2010 Who DOESN'T enjoy a gang bang? WTF
So now TMZ's dropping two more alleged bombs of lilo's lawyer quitting and lilo swearing to 'appeal' the judge's sentence.
*breathes a long, slow deep breath* Where's my damn cushioned lawnchair again, ugh.
=== "...Find...And Fulfill...Your Destiny..." ===
•
Submitted by LisaRose on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:45pm.
Did anyone notice the notes Lindsay took in court with a red pen? Her printing is SO NEAT, from afar it looked way too pretty to be someone's notes. I give her an A+ for penmanship. I also hope Kim can help her in some way before she goes off to jail.
------------------------
I used to draw masterpieces and write novellas when I was gakked out on Adderall so I doubt her penmanship is so great without it. I cannot believe she is taking speed with booze, coke, Zoloft, Trazodone and Dilaudid. what dentist prescribes a NOTORIOUS ADDICT Dilaudid?!? the judge just saved this ungrateful little twat's life. when she gets out of jail, she'll be like, "I'm so thankful Judge Marsha saved me from myself."
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 2:02pm.
NOT ONCE did she compare her situation to the Iranian woman's situation!
__________________________________
Tell us, All Knowing One, why do YOU think blowhole linked the site? Enlighten us.
=== "...Find...And Fulfill...Your Destiny..." ===
Submitted by Glambert on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 2:00pm.
She did NOT ONCE compare her situation to the Iranian woman's situation!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
LMFAO yeah it takes a fucking rocket scientist to figure out what this dumbass was insinuating! Just like she didnt write Fuck u Judge Revel on her nail, but everyone new who it was meant for!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
LOON ALERT!
=== "...Find...And Fulfill...Your Destiny..." ===
NOT ONCE did she compare her situation to the Iranian woman's situation!
Don't make up lies!
She takes delusion to a whole new level. I mean, bitch is actually citing the UN Convention on Human Rights. Are you kidding me????? It's pretty disgusting to me that she has so little idea about actual human rights abuses that she would actually put HERSELF in those categories.
On the other hand, if this experience makes Lilo become an advocate for a more just legal system, prisoners' rights causes, or human rights in general, then I guess not all is lost.
FOK U!! IT IS ENGRISH!
Did anyone notice the notes Lindsay took in court with a red pen? Her printing is SO NEAT, from afar it looked way too pretty to be someone's notes. I give her an A+ for penmanship. I also hope Kim can help her in some way before she goes off to jail.
________________
I Love You More
________________
Submitted by kokoskitten on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:35pm.
Smoking isn't allowed in any prison... (maybe Arkansas or Alabama but I don't think so)
**********************************************
She's not going to prison, she's going to County Jail.
And unless shit has changed in the last 12 years, there are outside areas where you can smoke.
If smoking isn't allowed in prison, then why are cigarettes considered currency in jails. Or am I watching to many old timey TV shows.
Lindsay was probably not even paying her lawyer anyways. Not surprising that Lindsay has replaced her with someone who just passed the bar.
Submitted by chefcammi on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:27pm.
Link to Blohan's lawyer quitting.
I'd be really wary of a lawyer named Tiffany.
◘○☼♂♪ó╔ß
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
"MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken"
- Louis Black
Smoking isn't allowed in any prison... (maybe Arkansas or Alabama but I don't think so)
_______________________________________________
and I was helping children in Morocco, it wasn't like a vacation...
Right chere M.E.
http://www.tmz.com/2010/07/08/lindsay-lohan-jail-rules-cigarettes-make-u...
____________________________________________
"This is why we can't have nice things"
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-Hat 04/27/2010
Submitted by KD on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:28pm.
Wow, PSL made Lindsey's lawyer QUIT!
*******************************
Ha! I kinda had a feeling she would;p
♥ Threadkilla!
"How does one go from the Air Force to the Bunny Ranch?"
O - it's only, like, an hour away." ~Judge Jeanine Pirro and complainant.
Talk Yuh Talk: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEH-v5dxdhQ
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:30pm.
Shhhh, M.E. thinks she's typing in French.
-------------------------------------------
ahhh fuckkkenen oOLOLOLOLolOLOL
-------------------------------------------------
Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Submitted by salacious on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:29pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:27pm.
♥ ♪ ♫ ♀ ♂ ◙ ► ☼ ○ ◘ • ♠ ♣ ♦ ☻ ☺
‼ ↕ ◄ ¶ § ▬ ↨ ↑ ↓ → ← ∟ ↔ ▲ ▼ ! " # $
---
Can't read any of this shit, is it chinese? Spic engrish for once!
====
Shhhh, M.E. thinks she's typing in French.
"I'm rich bitch!"
lol
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:27pm.
♥ ♪ ♫ ♀ ♂ ◙ ► ☼ ○ ◘ • ♠ ♣ ♦ ☻ ☺
‼ ↕ ◄ ¶ § ▬ ↨ ↑ ↓ → ← ∟ ↔ ▲ ▼ ! " # $
---
Can't read any of this shit, is it chinese? Spic engrish for once!
Wow, PSL made Lindsey's lawyer QUIT!
too bad Johnny Cochrane's dead .. he's prolly the only one who could get her off. Actually, scratch that.. once he found out she blamed her drunk ride of terror on the black kid and said Obama was colored he'd kick her to the curb.
Where does it say Blohan can't smoke?
Link to Blohan's lawyer quitting
Snowy, I'm confused with all these symbols... are you competing in the Caster Semenya team?
♥ ♪ ♫ ♀ ♂ ◙ ► ☼ ○ ◘ • ♠ ♣ ♦ ☻ ☺
‼ ↕ ◄ ¶ § ▬ ↨ ↑ ↓ → ← ∟ ↔ ▲ ▼ ! " # $
Submitted by snowpiece on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:21pm.
♀♀ =Sucky= GAYLORD
-------------------------------------------------
♂ = SNOWPHAT'S GENITAL SITUATION
-------------------------------------------------
Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
I love the restrictions they are having placed on her. No smoking. SHe's gonna crack. ____________________________________________
"This is why we can't have nice things"
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-Hat 04/27/2010
yup- just go to their website!!!
now you can scream "I'm rich bitch!"
yay!!
Mike - Viccy's give me the barfs. No can do.
Submitted by snowpiece on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:20pm.
♀♀ =Sucky
--------------------------------------------------
◘◘◘ NO ◘◘◘
-------------------------------------------------
Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.
Submitted by chefcammi on Thu, 07/08/2010 - 1:20pm.
&MZ has learned... Lindsay Lohan's lawyer, Shawn Chapman Holley, has resigned as LiLo's lawyer
If this is true.. I am gonna pocket $10 from a bet.