Further Proof That Donald Duck Is A Horny Perv
In case you didn't you couldn't tell from the fact that Donald Duck wears a sailor costume without pants ("Me tooooo" - Tommy Girl), he is one of the perviest pervs in the Magic Kingdom! Here's a story out of the Smoking Gun that furthers proves this! 27-year-old April Magalon of Pennsylvania claims that her nipple freeze in fear whenever she sees a duck, because she remembers the traumatic day in May '08 when Donald Duck grabbed her titty without asking at Epcot Center in Florida.
TSG reports that April is suing Disney for $50,000 claiming that she suffered severe physical injury and emotional anguish after Donald Duck molested her chest and then lifted up his snowy white hands in the air “indicating he had done something wrong."
April is currently being treated for the money grubbing drama queen disorder post-traumatic stress disorder she suffers from thanks to Donald's wandering hands. April's lawsuit also mentions that there's a long list of incidents involving costumed Disney characters molesting on unsuspecting victims.
While I do agree that Donald belongs on a government list, I have to say that it is a world of confusion in those costumes. No, I'm not a furry...yet. When I was 18, I auditioned to be a costumed character at Disneyland. It was a desperate time and I needed the booze/lube money, okay!? They put me into a Tigger costume and it was like slipping into Amy Wino's head! Everything was blurry, I could barely see shit and after a few minutes I got the delusions from breathing in my own recycled air. I'm not condoning Donald's nasty ass, but maybe the chick in the costume didn't know what she was doing.
But I'm still going to pass April two pieces of NSFW evidence she can use in court against Donald. JUMP!!!!
The duck is fucked and not in the way he was hoping for!
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Ummm... Donald Duck is usually played by small girls, since you have to five foot to dress as him. I'm pretty sure this was an accident dumbass. Besides who gets PTSD for getting felt up for a second when you're 25?!?!?! RUH-TARD.
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That's impossible. Everyone knows that Donald gets thirsty for the peen, but I have to concede this evidence MK presented might put say otherwise. Great post as usual and thanks for sharing another anecdote from your past.
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"Sal, darling, you are the reason some women go gay. ♥" - Submitted by Dog on Fri, 07/09/2010 - 6:32pm.
Submitted by Dr. ChiChi Diam... on Fri, 2010-08-13 00:46.
I know the plight of this poor girl. On my last visit to Disneyland in Anaheim, I was smoking a cigarette on Tom Sawyer's island. Suddenly, somebody dressed as Mickey Mouse confronted me in *** Joe's cave and flashed a badge. Within minutes, I found myself on a barge back to Main Street USA. They took me to an underground interrogation room. Mickey started with the good cop routine and asked if I needed to use the bathroom. Scared out of my wits, I complied and went to the toilet. Suddenly, Mickey kicked in the door of my stall, turned me around, placed me face down across the toilet and violently s@d@mized me without lubricant! To this day, I cannot look at a mouse without feeling violated
does the lawyer realize that suing a non-human Cartoon Character for an alleged repeated crime is ... absurd.
They should cite as EVIDENCE that Donald Duck gets angry soo fast, too and that he hates Mickey...
He should go to jail in Santa Maria, Neverland too.
Even if the person did do it on purpose, she is two years too late. The statue of limitations ran out in May. Why did it take her over two years to file suit? Why any lawyer would give her the time of day is beyond me.
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What in the praying mantis crackhooker hell is this?! - MK 9/11/09
I suffered from "emotional anguish" after reading about this fuckery.
Where's my $50,000? check, please!
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"LiLo is talking like she has swam out of the Jack Daniels bottle, hiked past the coke mountains, dove off of a crack spoon and is now ready to be someone's sponsor or something." -MK
A toy soldier touched my butt at Disney about 5 years ago. I got such a kick out of it I didn't bother to complain. I'm such a ho.
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www.myspace.com/lazeechile
where in the fuck is that donald riding machine?!?!?!?! that what i wanna know!!!
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"low self esteem is a bitch"...
And just when I was swearing off Disneyland. Now I gotta start saving up my dimes. Maybe someday (sing it) .......... will ... my ..... in back of the .......
Submitted by mizsherle on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 4:51pm.
Donald Duck was only living up to the tradition of all Disney theme park characters. I thought that getting fresh was part of the job description.
^I read an article once that was called something like "Disney employees behaving badly: the TRUE STORY behind Minnie Mouse and Princess Jasmine." The person claimed they all had orgies and went on coke binges when off-duty. One of their employees just got busted for child porn.
I'd probably go psycho too if I had to wear that suit all day...it's like customer service on steroids!
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"LiLo is talking like she has swam out of the Jack Daniels bottle, hiked past the coke mountains, dove off of a crack spoon and is now ready to be someone's sponsor or something." -MK
Submitted by Few Words on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 12:06pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 12:01pm.
Speaking of balls....do ducks have balls?
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apparently. they served them up in a soup on "Top Chef."
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I didn't ask to be hated
I just don't mind being a bitch.
(Courtney Love)
Donald Duck was only living up to the tradition of all Disney theme park characters. I thought that getting fresh was part of the job description.
Submitted by pancho on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 3:26pm.
It's sacrilege to use post-traumatic stress disorder - a condition resulting from the carnage of the World War 1 trenches
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You don't have to be in WW1 to get PTSD but that's where it got named.
ETA: But yeah - it's ridic to try and say you have it cuz you got felt up by Donald Duck.
♥ Threadkilla!
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
$50,000 for a boob touch, yikes.
My Blog
It's sacrilege to use post-traumatic stress disorder - a condition resulting from the carnage of the World War 1 trenches - to a titty touch up by a giant duck.
Still I was expecting to see a claim for $500 million rather than the teensy amount sought.
So is she mad that he did it or that he did it without asking? And ptsd? Really? I don't know about that
Submitted by mcnightmare on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:40am.
so Donald put his hands up afterwards like "whoa! did i just grope your titty with my ducky paws? i did, huh? my bad."
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Mickey did that with me. He thought he was being cute with those big paws/hands.
Mickey Mouse goosed me at Disneyland and I did not sue. It was grad night (the overnight party for high school seniors they do every year) 1989 Mickey, don't you remember.
this doesn't surprise me--that donald duck grabbed someone's boob. when i was 15 at disneyworld with my friends (for a school trip), tigger grabbed my butt during a photo. of course, you couldn't see where his paws were in the picture.
FUCK DISNEYLAND.
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Have an open mind - but not so open that your brain falls out.
Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 12:56pm.
Donald is wearing big thick fake duck hands. Maybe I just love Disney World too much, but I think it was probably an accident. Now if it was Aladdin or one of the generic princes, OK maybe I could see that. But with those big awkward costumes, it would be easy to accidentally bump someone.
I was just about to post the same thing, I totally agree.
"money grubbing drama queen disorder" is the 2010 disease of the year! As well as these crazy ho's we snark at on this site,I know some local tricks that suffer from this too. This disease has even spread to the Happiest Place on Earth! It just needs a spokesperson...or at least a group on Facebook?
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"Regular people pay for birthday cakes, you idiotic pig with the self-entitlement of a billion Kanyes." -MK
Donald is wearing big thick fake duck hands. Maybe I just love Disney World too much, but I think it was probably an accident. Now if it was Aladdin or one of the generic princes, OK maybe I could see that. But with those big awkward costumes, it would be easy to accidentally bump someone.
Ne-phfther thrust a thuck withp no panthpfs.
[edit] didn't have a second comment, just accidentally submitted my first comment twice and(a) it wasn't that funny the first time, and (b)didn't want to be unintentionally annoying.
Is that Christina Aguilera?
I'm guessing this woman has never experienced a rave, or been in an uber-crowded club.
Someone just sent me a txt yesterday of Donald getting a hummer.
Bitch should have been flattered that the Donald hit on her. But I bet Daisy is pissed.
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 12:15pm.
Angel_i - Hmmmm, it was 7:45am when I was in there.
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Case closed! One Kajillion Dollars awarded to ME!
*gavels the shit outta da desk*
♥ Threadkilla!
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
Angel_i - Hmmmm, it was 7:45am when I was in there.
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 12:07pm.
I may have poured it myself, but THEY brewed it!
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Trudat. But it's better than a green hot dog.
Recently I went into 7-11 at 4:30 maybe 5am and it was the most bizarre experience. Everybody was running. And there was an extra guy stocking new chips - it was a madhouse of activity. I was almost afraid to move! But everything was all crisp and new and fresh looking! So really it means your best 7-11 experiences are too be had between 5 and 7am...speaking of which -isn't it about time they changed their name to 24-7? Or maybe from 7 to 11 is when everything gets trashed and stays that way til the next day....
♥ Threadkilla!
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
Chiri, better put Flora, Fauna and Merryweather on that suit
i outta sue disney for giving us britney,
lohan and every retard on HS musical
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♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 12:01pm.
Speaking of balls....do ducks have balls?
Are dewd duck's junk internal or external plumbing?
Do female ducks have tits? As in like nipples?
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Ducks are fowl, not mammals, and are titless. However, male ducks do have testicles and an external penis.
http://en.allexperts.com/q/Wild-Animals-705/duck-anatomy.htm
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I never that it was your fault.
I said that I was going to blame you.
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I was thinking how great it would be to get selected for a jury for this lawsuit. Wouldn't you love to see Donald at the defendant table squabbling with his lawyer?
"What's your motto?" "Kill everyone NOW"
I would like to sue Sleeping Beauty! Through out my fuckin middle school/teenage years bitches called me Aurora instead of my real name. that's when I started to tell bitches NO MORE! call me by my nickname from now on. For that, I want my respect back. $8million will do.
Coma Caca!
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She was asking for it. It's obvious from this evidence that women LOVE Donald.
♥ Threadkilla!
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
Submitted by angel_i on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 12:01pm.
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:55am.
7-11 served me burned coffee.
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They SERVED you?!
Dontcha gotta get it urself?
I always smell it first. Btw:)
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I may have poured it myself, but THEY brewed it!
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 12:01pm.
Speaking of balls....do ducks have balls?
Are dewd duck's junk internal or external plumbing?
Do female ducks have tits? As in like nipples?
GO ASK KENNY ROGERS & MEG RYAN
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:55am.
7-11 served me burned coffee.
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Must be the 7-11 I go to. They served me a green hot dog. I think it had been on that rotating grill thing for nearly a year.
I was scarred and developed weinerphobia.
"What's your motto?" "Kill everyone NOW"
Submitted by mcnightmare on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:40am.
so Donald put his hands up afterwards like "whoa! did i just grope your titty with my ducky paws? i did, huh? my bad."
that image will follow me around today, making me laugh at inappopriate times; i can almost guarantee it.
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LOL! Same! LOL!
♥ Threadkilla!
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:43am.
Do those costumes have a cooling system inside, like Gene Simmons "Rocky" costume with the fan?
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No. They do not:(
Which might explain why people get a little crazy in there.
♥ Threadkilla!
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:58am.
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:57am.
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:55am.
7-11 served me burned coffee.
I'm going to sue.
It's psychologically affected me as I will never be the same again, I am forever adverted from coffee and my livelyhood is suffering due to this.
I am suing for $1 Milion.
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Did you add any creamer (artificial or real) to mitigate your damages? ;)
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OHH! I DID!!! The Cinnabun flavored creamer.
$1.5 million.
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Does your claim include loss of consortium due to a burnt tongue and gastic upset? If not, add it to your claim.
Does your claim include pain and suffering due to a burnt tongue and gastic upset? If not, add it to your claim.
Does your claim include lost wages due to a burnt tongue and gastic upset? If not, add it to your claim.
Does your claim include medical expenses (physician and psych) due to a burnt tongue and gastic upset? If not, add it to your claim.
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I never that it was your fault.
I said that I was going to blame you.
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Speaking of balls....do ducks have balls?
Are dewd duck's junk internal or external plumbing?
So many questions.
Do female ducks have tits? As in like nipples?
I obviously need a life.
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:55am.
7-11 served me burned coffee.
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They SERVED you?!
Dontcha gotta get it urself?
I always smell it first. Btw:)
♥ Threadkilla!
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
Submitted by kokoskitten on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:52am.
As much as I think she is probably exaggerating/making this story up it's refreshing to see someone aim low for a lawsuit.
Frankly, I think she's low-balling it in hopes that it will give her a better chance for a settlement.
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:57am.
Submitted by M.E. on Thu, 08/12/2010 - 11:55am.
7-11 served me burned coffee.
I'm going to sue.
It's psychologically affected me as I will never be the same again, I am forever adverted from coffee and my livelyhood is suffering due to this.
I am suing for $1 Milion.
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Did you add any creamer (artificial or real) to mitigate your damages? ;)
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OHH! I DID!!! The Cinnabun flavored creamer.
$1.5 million.
DISNEY IS A WHORE FARM RUN BY PEDOS
☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.