It's Like Hoodies: Kanye Cleanses Himself On Twitter
Kanye West woke up this morning on his solid gold throne feeling like he just wanted to dip himself into a cyber vat of holy water and wash off a few layers of his ego by apologizing to Taylor Swift for imma-ing her at the VMAs last year...among other things.
Kanye slid into the confessional booth opposite Father Twitter Bird and confessed that he wrote a special song for Taylor and that the media has wrongfully portrayed him as an angry white girl hater who represents the word ASSHOLE on Google Images. Note: George Bush, St. Angie Jolie and Gene Simmons are all on the first two pages when you Google "asshole," but Kanye is not. But does he show up on the second page when you Google "egomaniac." FYI.
Kanye's entire new life manifesto is after the jump. It's a holiday weekend so Kanye's CAPS LOCK KEY has the day off. Kanye had to SHIFT this bitch.
If you think this is going to make your eyes invent a new kind of roll, let me just tell you that one of his Tweets starts with "Remember in Anchor Man when Ron Burgandy..." You can't fully throw hate on Kanye's Bible of Self-Revelations when he brings Anchor Man (and WICKED) into it. Warning: It's longer than you can ever EVER imagine.
Slide into the booth with Kanye and JUMP!
"Man I love Twitter... I've always been at the mercy of the press but no more... The media tried to demonize me. They wanted yall to believe I was a monster in real life so you guys wouldn't listen or buy my music anymore. I feel like they were waiting for the opportunity to go in all the way on me and when it came they beat me to a pulp.
Even now a lot of articles start there first 2 paragraphs about how much of an asshole I am. I accept the idea (ideal) that perception is reality. When I say perception is reality I mean whatever you think is the truth... is your truth. Some people's truth is Kanye is racist... It's not my truth but I do believe it's my Karma.... walk with me...
Even though the NBC telethon was widely praised yall didn't think they was just gone let me get away with that did yall???!!! With the help of strong will, a lack of impathy, a lil alcohol and extremely distasteful & bad timing ... I became George Bush over night.
How deep is the scar... I bled hard.. cancelled tour with the number one pop star in the world ... closed the doors of my clothing office. Had to let employees go... for the first time I felt the impact of my brash actions ... I felt the recession from an ownership side.
People booed when I would go to concerts and the performer mentioned my name. Remember in Anchor Man when Ron Burgandy cursed on air and the entire city turned on him? But this wasn't a joke. This was & is my real life. There are people who don't dislike me... they absolutely hate me!
I was chilling with this white girl having a conversation and she cut me off and said... Hold up... I thought you didn't like us?! That's when you realize perception is reality. I've been straying from this subject on twitter but I have to give it to you guys raw now.
If you google Asshole my face may very well pop up 2 pages into the search. Some people say... Why worry about "the haters?" This is bigger that just the concept of haters. I have a mission in life to bring truth and beauty through my music and the visuals that anchor around it. The media has successfully diminished the "receptive" audience of (3rd person)... KANYE WEST...taking a 15 second blip the mdeia have successfully painted the image of the "ANGRY BLACK MAN' The King Kong theory.
I'm the guy who at one point could perform the Justin Timberlake on stage and everyone would be sooo happy that I was there.
People tweeted that they wish I was dead... No listen. They wanted me to die people. I carry that. I smile and take pictures through that. I wear my scars... It's almost like I have to where a suit to juxtapose my image and I won't lie... IT WORKS!
I wrote a song for Taylor Swift that's so beautiful and I want her to have it. If she won't take it then I'll perform it for her. She had nothing to do with my issues with award shows. She had no idea what hit her. She's justa lil girl with dreams like the rest of us. She deserves the apology more than anyone. Thank you Biz Stone and Evan Williams for creating a platform where we can communicate directly.
We're both artist and the media and managers are trying to get between us. Everyone wants to capitalize off this is some way. I'm ready to get out of my own way. The ego is overdone... it's like hoodies.
I know there are family members friends and fans that have literally fought for me. There are people who have named there kids after me... can you imagine that next day in school. Even though I don't have kids...
I am responsible for those who love and represent me and what they have to deal with on a day to day defending "The American Psycho". I watched Justin Timberlake at the Grammies loose every televised award including album of the year which the Dixie Chicks won. I would have ran on stage for Justin that night because Sexy Back (in my mind) was that important... that impactful to our culture. It's not about race America. No one in our position ever stands up and says anything anymore. I have given my awards to other groups multiple times on national TV... They never showed that this past year during the massacre of Kanye.
Who's seen the play Wicked? I've seen it 4 times! Other than loving the music acting and costumes... it's my story!!! The Wicked witch of the west basically is so convicted to tell her' truth when she does it she is outcasted by society and turned WICKED.
With new found humility ... who am I to run on stage? I would never ever again in a million years do that. Sorry to let you down. It is distasteful to cut people off as a general rule. What's the point of dressing tastefully if I'm going to act the complete opposite? Yes I was that guy. A 32 year old child.
When I woke up from the crazy nightmare I looked in the mirror and said GROW UP KANYE ... I take the responsibility for my actions. I am not a bad person. Even in that moment I was only trying to do good but people don't always need my help. Beyonce didn't need that. MTV didn't need that and Taylor and her family friends and fans definitely didn't want or need that.
These aren't regular tweets... this is stream of consciousness ... I want you guys to know and feel where my head is at... It feels like the movie Heat when you wanted Deniro to make it... You want the bad guy to make it. These tweets have no manager, no publicist , no grammar checking... this is raw.
Humanity and Empathy are 2 of the 4 principles at facebook. Those were the 2 principles I was missing on that evening. Why are there so many tweets? Well this isn't a simple subject. There are layers to this beyond me running on stage. You've got the top layer... Kanye's rude!
If I speak in 3rd person it's because I'm quoting people sometimes I forget to put the quotations you know my grammar.. #ITSAPROCESS
You've got a layer of order... this is how things are spose to go this is how it's always been etc. You've got a layer of... What is reality? You really want this guy to die over an award show???!! wooooooow ..... You’ve got the Media play… Who benefitted off of the moment? MTV? JAY LENO? BEYONCE? ALL FORMS OF MEDIA? TAYLOR? KANYE WEST? Who gained? Who lost?
Walk with me people… let’s break this down for real now. I might get in trouble again lol? WHO BENEFITED FOR REAL PEOPLE???!!!!!!!! A year later where do we stand? There’s a layer of… hey Kanye said what I was thinking. There’s a layer of… Entertainment… we are entertainers and this is only TV… not the War. Why was it made into such a race issue. Taylor loves rap music… I love country music.
I’ve hurt, I’ve bled, I’ve learned. I only want to do good. I am passionate I am human I am real. I wish I could meet every hater. I wish I could talk to every hater face to face and change there a opinion of me one conversation at a time. I wish they all knew how much I really cared about music and pop culture and art and peoples feelings.
I wish they could accept that I’ve grown and only want to do good for the world. I want to help as many people as I can. I want to help starting with the music and ending with the smile. I want to win there hearts back so I can continue to bring my take on culture to the masses with a clean opinion.
It starts with this…
I’m sorry Taylor."
And then Kanye folded his speech, got off the podium and walked down the aisle towards his desk as I'm sitting there with my head cocked back, my mouth wide open and my eyes counting the holes in the perforated ceiling above. What did I just witness?!
• 
"He obviously believes because Beyonce is black she is more deserving than white Taylor. He is a bigot. But having said that everyone says and does stupid things sometimes. Everyone makes mistakes."
Que? That's not why he did it. Granted it was an obnoxious move, but it had NOTHING to do with race. A lot of people just happened to think Single Ladies was a more relevant video at the time, than whatever it was Taylor won for. It wasn't You Belong to Me, but the other one right? Exactly. My point is I'm pretty abreast with pop culture and I don't even recall the song.
Let Kanye be great. He personally apologized to her last year and a year later he's still getting death threats about the whole situation so he had a pseudo mental breakdown on Twitter to address it. lol I found it amusing to say the least. A bit too emo for me. I prefer Kanye smiling and talking about golden goblets and being great or whatever.
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"This is all rather 'may-jah'..."
~Posh-esque
Dude, every time you bring this up, it's like you're pouring a bucket of mud on your head. Apologize to Taylor, apologize to her fans, apologize to your fans, ONCE, and shut-up!
Submitted by boston61 on Mon, 09/06/2010 - 12:54pm.
He obviously believes because Beyonce is black she is more deserving than white Taylor.
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Could it also just be that he likes hip hop better than country?
♥ Threadkilla!
Hey Cee Lo. There are two sides to every story:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1940830
It's no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society. ~ Jiddu Krishnamurti
He obviously believes because Beyonce is black she is more deserving than white Taylor. He is a bigot. But having said that everyone says and does stupid things sometimes. Everyone makes mistakes.
IT'S LIKE CHRISTMAS!!!
Saint Fishlips DOES come up when I put in "asshole" on the image search on Google!
This is almost as good as when I found the "Madonna Blows Chunks" website!
Submitted by dfanintheD on Sun, 09/05/2010 - 9:05pm.
Kwame - I mean Kanye - just Twittered that the Black Crows had one of the "best videos of all-time." And apparently, Chris Robinson returned the Twitter love.
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I don't what's more funny about this sentence-- the fact that the Black Crowes actually PUT OUT a video, that someone actually SAW it, or that it was actually good.
still lmao....
He's not sorry for what he did. He's only sorry because he ruined his career. I mean... "walk with me". Who does he think he is... Jesus?
Kwame - I mean Kanye - just Twittered that the Black Crows had one of the "best videos of all-time." And apparently, Chris Robinson returned the Twitter love.
I have a folder in my business Outlook email titled 'Kanye,' for all of the random shit I don't quite care about, but don't want to delete, just in case I need it to quote from it one day... The IT guys all concur that I have the most amusing file/doc/folder names, passwords and settings in the whole company.
Note: George Bush, St. Angie Jolie and Gene Simmons are all on the first two pages when you Google "asshole," but Kanye is not. But does he show up on the second page when you Google "egomaniac." FYI.
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O! LOL! I kinda skimmed here thinking I knew what it would say but I really should know better with MK!
♥ Threadkilla!
We didn't start the Flame War:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1907543
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
What the fuck is that shirt he's wearing? Leather with... cinched sleeves?
I guess it's appropriate that he starts playing the victim now.
As a white girl I forgive you, Kanye (for the Swift incident, not for the abuse of your the caps lock key).
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Who are you calling silly cow?
Too late for Step 9, Kanye. Nobody wants to listen.
This would have been a better photo choice for this post.
http://i132.photobucket.com/albums/q37/heatherton/kanyedildo497X500.jpg
XX, Gay
Subscribe -> http://www.youtube.com/user/GayCarrington
Egomania is an obsessive preoccupation with one's self and applies to someone with delusions of personal greatness. Someone suffering from this extreme egocentric focus is known as "a tool".
http://www.kanyewest.com/home/#/home/page/18/
he's ridiculing this, but he is pretty much a different version of it.
Take a walk with me yeah Kayne you are such a victim! It was the that media made you into the racist over inflamed egotistical asshole you are, now I get it. Your not really that way we were not seeing you hop on the stage and grab the mic from Taylor, yell Beyonce was robbed, seeing your capital letter rants on twitter, or your drunken antics every where else that was the MEDIA portraying you to be something your not that's our reality not yours!
SHUT THE FUCK UP you stupid asshole take responsibility, say yeah I dun fucked up and then MAYBE we will talk until then your the same egotistical pig you always were. Bitchtits gayfish!
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Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
somebody needs to inform this guy about livejournal (LJ).
I'm pretty certain they don't have a character limit on emo suck.
omg
i literally have a headache from that and need to rest my eyes. the man is insane. he needs serious help. wow.
Someone needs to create a huge 2-story tall bottle of Hennessy so this dumb fuck can crawl in & drown.
~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♦¤♦~♥~♥~♦¤♦~♥~
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VP3Q1nOzgR0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t56s4dZ1_rs
OMG now I'm fascinated by this bitch's website. I kid you not:
http://www.kanyewest.com/home/#/home/page/11/
♥ Threadkilla!
We didn't start the Flame War:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1907543
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
Submitted by sonah22 on Sat, 09/04/2010 - 8:46pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 09/04/2010 - 6:51pm.
What suspicions? What are y'all talking about with Common and Kanye? Does it have something to do with ghostwriting? Tellmetellme!
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Ha! It sounds like BitchHouse knows more than I do ...I just remember from back in the day when Common was hanging with No I.D. and Kanye's mommy came along and said: Can Kanye hang out witchu boys? And then Common and No ID fell out it seemed....and how Kanye always attaches himself to the biggest name and kinda leaves Common in the dust when it's really obvious that he was always drawing from him in all his work....and then what happened to GOOD? I just don't know - I lost touch...I don't know - Kanye just seems like he'd do it;p
It's hard for me, right now too cuz I just heard Monster and it's ...um...really fucking good. I dunno...
♥ Threadkilla!
We didn't start the Flame War:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1907543
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
If Taylor's forgiven him and moved on, then so have I. He was probably plastered out of his skull at the time anyway (not that that excuses what he did, but who in their right mind would do something like that?)
@Squiggles, I loved "College Dropout" too. Great stuff. His latest CD really overdid it with the godawful autotune, though...I hope he stays far away from that and just sticks to rapping from now on.
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Now, cryin' won't help you, prayin' won't do you no good,
When the levee breaks, mama, you got to move.
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Yeah yeah Kanye - it's the MEDIA'S FAULT!!! You didn't say any of those things - the media made it all up to demonize you because, because...well, because you are too GREAT. DANGEROUSLY great. Like your GREATness could be used as a weapon of mass destruction or something. Yeah! That's it.
SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU FUCK
..............................................................................................
Have an open mind - but not so open that your brain falls out.
drowning not waving
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 09/04/2010 - 6:51pm.
What suspicions? What are y'all talking about with Common and Kanye? Does it have something to do with ghostwriting? Tellmetellme!
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Madonna needs to stop. These days it's more like Dolce and Your Grandma.
-Submitted by Echo27 on Wed, 08/25/2010 - 5:41pm.
HA--he was snockered when that happened. NO excuse and it was rude--but c'mon, pretty funny and different and more interesting than the usual self- aggrandizing, boring awards shows.
http://www.sceneoutlines.blogspot.com
jeususbuddhamary no way no how am reading that unfurled toilet paper-long rant --- eyes rollinrollinrollin outta here...
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Illuminati Monarch Slave, at your service.
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I also still like Kanye's music better than Taylor's. I can't even name one of her songs.. I like quite a few of his. So whatever.
This Kanye/Taylor thing really needs to just be forgotten. Okay, he made a huge ass of himself and I am sure he regrets it. He was drunk. Who hasn't made a horrific ass of themselves at one point or another drunk? Must be so embarassing to be constantly reminded of it.
Thanks, BitchHouse! That affirms me too! I just think the course of events have been VERY suspicious. That and the fact that Common is a WAY more interesting rapper even without the light show.
But this is also pretty heartbreaking, it's true:
Music veteran Phil Collins and country music star Taylor Swift will be among the honorees at the prestigious Songwriters Hall of Fame Awards next month. (June)
I mean, I said she was talented but I'd hardly call her a Hall of Famer at this point.
♥ Threadkilla!
We didn't start the Flame War:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1907543
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
Gay fish...
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 09/04/2010 - 4:46pm.
@BitchHouse: Ok, I'm totally loosely basing that on a theory I kinda sorta feel may or may not be true based on information I do and do not have:) *shhhhhh!*:)
Angel_i, it is probably true. Your comment actually affirms something i thought for awhile about this idiot doing business with some other idiot (hint: KVD post) who himself dissed Common a long time ago. I suspected these two morons have been working together for awhile, now i am convinced.
Who benefited? Taylor Swift. What better way to get public sympathy and make fans than having some heavy publicly humiliate you? I hope she sends him muffin baskets and shit each week. She owes him.
he still sucks either way...I couldn't read all that blather cause it is too headache causing...
Submitted by Kandykane on Sat, 09/04/2010 - 5:35pm.
IDGAF. IMO Taylor Swift is a product who didn't deserve to win in the first place. Someone needed to put that silly little bitch in her place and Kanye was the one .... he pissed off the industry honchos tho cos Taylor is their lil mouthpiece.
--As much as he is hilarious, I liked that he did that (Beyonce DID deserve awards for that video and song), but now he's saying sorry because he's getting flack for it. If he stood by it and explained it in a WELL WRITTEN statement, I would have respect. He doesn't need to take it back. He just needs to be smarter about how he protests, which would include knowing how to write a paragraph or hiring someone who does.
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Madonna needs to stop. These days it's more like Dolce and Your Grandma.
-Submitted by Echo27 on Wed, 08/25/2010 - 5:41pm.
Yet again, Kanye proves that he is far less relevant to music and society than what his over-sized ego allows him believe. His image doesn't show up until page 23 into a Google search for "asshole."
To this day, I can watch Anchor Man and still appreciate it like it came out yesterday.
________________________________________
Nothing says "real love" like matching mug shots. -Michael Kay
Can someone please make Kayne go away like forever?
IDGAF. IMO Taylor Swift is a product who didn't deserve to win in the first place. Someone needed to put that silly little bitch in her place and Kanye was the one .... he pissed off the industry honchos tho cos Taylor is their lil mouthpiece.
The fact that this is SOOOOOOOO LONG and he thinks that people are going to bother to read it just shows that he's still an ego maniac.
I'll say it so he can understand: YOU ARE A YEAR TOO LATE AND EVERYONE WAS OVER IT, SO STOP TRYING TO MILK THIS FOR EVEN MORE ATTENTION, KANYE.
This man sweats himself...hard, I read half of that shit and got bored. A true apology would have taken two or three lines. This is just another piece in his quest to seem deep. It didn't work, Kanye, but I like your music! I'm also impressed you left the caps button alone!
Kanye, Kanye, Kanye - you're a rapper, right?
Why don't you try rapping about it?
I know - it's a stretch but maybe it'll make you feel better:)
♥ Threadkilla!
We didn't start the Flame War:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1907543
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
Submitted by swarm-of-locusts on Sat, 09/04/2010 - 3:10pm.
@Submitted by nightowl on Sat, 09/04/2010 - 2:52pm.
How about this:
She had a light skinned friend
looked like Michael Jackson
got a dark skinned friend
looked like Michael Jackson"
VERY CREATIVE!
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LMAO!!!! I'm sure he was trying to be deep but that shit just sounds stupid. Kanye's greatest talent is his ability to convince the bourgeoisie that he's some kind of ghetto savant that admires their lifestyle when the truth is he's just some middle-class dude playing an angle for coinage.
---Yeah his angle is that he didn't go to college-his first two albums had something to do with that. I guess since his mom is a professor, he's milking that he rebelled against her. And then his insistence that women are gold diggers who take all his money. What an ass. And um wow, way to encourage black youth-tell them to stop trying to "fit in" and do shit to better their lives because that's DEEP, especially if you have opportunity and you shun it to be like other "cool" rappers. And I love how his nonprofit then tries to promote education? Um, okay. He's so corny it's ridiculous.
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Madonna needs to stop. These days it's more like Dolce and Your Grandma.
-Submitted by Echo27 on Wed, 08/25/2010 - 5:41pm.
@BitchHouse: Ok, I'm totally loosely basing that on a theory I kinda sorta feel may or may not be true based on information I do and do not have:) *shhhhhh!*:)
♥ Threadkilla!
We didn't start the Flame War:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1907543
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 09/04/2010 - 4:38pm.
O no wait! No one cares about Common cuz you done threw him under the bus!
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whaaaaaaaaat???
Ok - thanks to all the readers out there.
He thinks Wicked is his story?
Who is the Good Witch? Common?
O no wait! No one cares about Common cuz you done threw him under the bus!
♥ Threadkilla!
We didn't start the Flame War:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1907543
What's the point of havin' a rapier wit if I can't use it to stab people?
~ Jeph Jacques
And here I thought he couldn't be more slimy than before. Turd takes the cake. He is so far up his own ass he sees in sepia. Loser in the human stakes. I bet his mama is proud when she looks up from hell to see him ..... the sweet boy she raised to be so self-aware that he thinks everyone needs to know why he does anything and everything. Suck it Kanye.
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"I'm sorry you feel that way ..... may the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits"
"The ego is overdone... it's like hoodies.
I know there are family members friends and fans that have literally fought for me. There are people who have named there kids after me... can you imagine that next day in school. Even though I don't have kids.."
LOL-wtf? He is so silly.
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Madonna needs to stop. These days it's more like Dolce and Your Grandma.
-Submitted by Echo27 on Wed, 08/25/2010 - 5:41pm.