GOOPY Heart
Fishsticks Paltrow as a down home country star?! And not just any down home country star, but a down home country star who wakes up in a puddle of her own whiskey-scented barf and drunkenly dances on top of tables at bars! Please, like we don't know that Fishy wakes up on 10,000-count thread sheets and doesn't get on top of her $50,000 imported coffee table unless it will help her get closer to her spiritual essence. This shit is not believable!
My favorite part of this trailer is at the very end when Fishy is supposed to be hoofin' it up on stage, but she looks more like that 30-day lemon seed and cucumber water cleanse got the best of her and she's trying to run for the nearest toilet.
That being said, I really hope the cat on Tim McGraw's head gets a nomination for this since the poor thing was ROBBED of one for playing John Travolta's hair in Old Dogs.
via Vulture
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I thought Crazy Heart was boooring as hell and now Fishsticks makes this. Why don't you just pluck my ass hairs one by one and get it over with.
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Don't hate me cause I'm DLeautiful
fuck goopy, but garrett hedlund is a hot piece and a half!
The female version of Jeff Bridges and 'Crazy Heart' she aint. I was kinda hopin' that she'd gorn away.
wow that looks really bad
www.theinfamouslife.com
www.twitter.com/so_infamous
Yano, the hangover din't seem so bad till I played that clip.
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I'd like to flay you with my rapier wit, but I'm afraid it's about as dull as fucking your mother.
Submitted by ritzyroxie: "This shit is sooo cliche. It's like some loser writer got stoned, watched Dream Girls and All About Eve and then fell asleep while watching Reba."
Ha, ha! Comments like these keep me clicking the Comments section. Dead on and funny and not just blindly uncouth.
I think that reading about how fabulously wealthy and "tasteful" she is, her expensive, remade, huge ass apartment, her children with their Hummers and nannies is not a great juxtaposition with your role as a down and out country singer. Yes, yes, I know it's acting, but we didn't read, and never read, about Meryl Streep's incredible perks, anytime, and especially if she's playing a Holocaust survivor or Karen Silkwood.
It doesn't matter. I find Paltrow an insufferable snob and no amount of her overrated acting can make me see her as anything else but a Serena what's her name with a very fortunate acting career, courtesy of connections and money.
If I can catch a double feature of Cuntry Strong and Burlesque at the dollar theatre, my life will be complete!
D V D
Submitted by Einah Teb on Fri, 09/10/2010 - 2:15pm.
I think a lot of people are remembering a made-for-tv movie called Country Gold (1982), starring Loni Anderson and Linda Hamilton.
-Einah
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That is the movie!!! It's loosely based on Dolly, no wonder I remembered big boobs!! thank you so much Einah Teb!!!
I was drinking my coffee watching this sorry ass trailer, until Gweenie started yelping "Country Strong", I laughed so hard, I almost choked on the coffee.
How low she has sunk. I fucking love it.
Sorry Gwennie, you can't pull off being a country singer.
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"I was born with glitter on my face;
My baby clothes made of leather and lace"
This trailer made me blush with embarrassment and that never, ever happens! Cuntry Strong indeed.
Submitted by shakemykitty on Fri, 09/10/2010 - 5:03pm.
"Biological clock" is almost as useless as "maternal instinct." Some women shouldn't have custody of a goldfish-like that cretin who almost killed herself with breast implants bigger than Aretha Franklin's butt. What's known as a maternal instinct is really a nurturing instinct. The last three films I liked had VERY odd female characters-a vampire,a pubescent assassin, and a bisexual genius with free-floating rage.
I refuse to watch to any movie in which a prostitute is the main character. If I ever run into John Singleton at an alumni function,I intend to tell him that producing Hustle and Flow killed the last bit of respect I had for him.
A.cowt I would settle for any movie that actually portrayed any woman-whether southern or not- as she really is. We either get some anorexic fake tittied oompha loompha arm candy whore or some aging desperate biological clock ticking girl next door searching for her prince charming. But you are right, I get amused when I travel and meet people who think we are all racist uneducated hicks. No matter where you grew up and under what circumstances, education is what you make out of it. Most people I talk to are nice and polite and are astonished that we can order from a menu without pictures but there has been a few I wanted to open a can of whip ass on (Drake hotel staff in Chicago for example-don't ever stay there)
LadyBird83
I'm sorry I just don't buy it. Gwyn, you still look like you have a stick in your ass. Why don't you just keep pretending to be British and leave the south alone?
Looks like a LIFETIME movie of the week to me! Oh Goopy, you are NOT a performer. Stick to acting.
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I'M DONESVILLE!
Nourish the Inner Asshole
Borrachas of the world unite and take over!
Submitted by shakemykitty on Fri, 09/10/2010 - 3:58pm.
Agree Acow.t-Gretchen is fierce but,alas, she would not be a suitable role model as she wouldn't take shit from no one. This POS movie is yet another generic stereotypical film portraying a southern woman as some scared, uneducated subserviant doormat that finally grows a spine. I might have grown up in BFN(butt fucking nowhere) Georgia but I grew up a vertebrate and I can assure everyone that stupid people are everywhere and not confined to the South. Who writes this shit anyway? Is this the best Hollywood can do for women's roles? Are we defined by being some man's arm candy or doormat-OR-worse as some goldigging whore?
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Gretchen Wilson should star in a movie about a real GRIT. Shannen Doherty,the ultimate bitch we love to hate was excellent as Margaret Mitchell in a network TV miniseries.It could work with GW. In other parts of the US,the Deep South is seen as Deliverance country instead of as the birthplace of multiple contributions to American culture,both high and low. Southerners are perceived as uneducated and incapable of being educated, regardless of gender,race or age. Never mind the number of respectable universities in the South. I say this as a native Californian raised by Displaced Southerners who married a nice guy from Tennessee. My Southern Lit collection grew from a desire to understand the DPs from New Orleans who raised me.
Mr. W gave me hardback,autographed, first edition of Southern Ladies and Gentleman.
Agree Acow.t-Gretchen is fierce but,alas, she would not be a suitable role model as she wouldn't take shit from no one. This POS movie is yet another generic stereotypical film portraying a southern woman as some scared, uneducated subserviant doormat that finally grows a spine. I might have grown up in BFN(butt fucking nowhere) Georgia but I grew up a vertebrate and I can assure everyone that stupid people are everywhere and not confined to the South. Who writes this shit anyway? Is this the best Hollywood can do for women's roles? Are we defined by being some man's arm candy or doormat-OR-worse as some goldigging whore?
This looks like a CMT special event.
Wait. Or is she trying to be a lushy Taylor Swift in 20 years?
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POOP (nourish the inner asshole)- MK
they shoulda cast soookay in this mess as kelly
they shoulda cast soookay in this mess as kelly
Submitted by A.cotw on Fri, 09/10/2010 - 3:22pm.
Submitted by fishsticksfan on Fri, 09/10/2010 - 2:49pm.
I love that song,too. Love good country music-Patsy Cline is right up there with Frank Sinatra for pure vocal talent. Do you think Gretchen Wilson should have been cast? K.D. Lang would have been perfect,too but we know Hollywood would never cast a Canadian Lesbian in a big budget film.
Your description is dead right-a Barbie Princess movie set in Nashville.
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Awesome. :D Or Barbie meets Gossip Girl in Nashville? lol Yes, this movie needed someone older or rougher. Like Jeff Bridges in Crazy Heart.
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POOP (nourish the inner asshole)- MK
Submitted by fishsticksfan on Fri, 09/10/2010 - 2:49pm.
I love that song,too. Love good country music-Patsy Cline is right up there with Frank Sinatra for pure vocal talent. Do you think Gretchen Wilson should have been cast? K.D. Lang would have been perfect,too but we know Hollywood would never cast a Canadian Lesbian in a big budget film.
Your description is dead right-a Barbie Princess movie set in Nashville.
Don' take someone outta re-hayb before they are re-hayub!
The 11th remake of star is born, or all about eve?
Halfway through the trailer and I already knew more about the movie than I wanted to. Heyell, this mowvie is baw-ring.
There's a movie I'll never see.
That is biggest pile of steaming dog shit I've seen since that one crappy movie she made with Huey Lewis years ago. WTF were they thinking??? This is just some embarrassing ass shit.
Submitted by A.cotw on Fri, 09/10/2010 - 2:14pm.
Gretchen Wilson is BEAUTIFUL and fierce.Even with a black bra strap hanging out of an ivory colored shirt. She does not take herself too seriously. Paltrow does. The film is doomed.
The evidence:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82dDnv9zeLs
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I love that song!! Gwynie should have seen that video before being a barbie princess.
THAT'S what this movie looks like! Like a Barbie Princess movie set in Nashville.
To win an oscar you have to play a whore, a drunk , a retard or someone of the opposite sex. She is doing all three here and I love it.
Fishy is not at all believable in this role.
Um, no. Love me some Tim McGraw but can't stand Gwenny or that chick from Gossip Girl and the younger dude looks down-home slow.
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I ALMOST threw up my grilled cheese sandwich but with Jesus in your life, you can overcome anything. - boobxqueen on Octomom's Star cover
That was atrocious. That has to be one of the most miscast roles of all time. It's seriously in my top 5.
I think a lot of people are remembering a made-for-tv movie called Country Gold (1982), starring Loni Anderson and Linda Hamilton.
-Einah
Gretchen Wilson is BEAUTIFUL and fierce.Even with a black bra strap hanging out of an ivory colored shirt. She does not take herself too seriously. Paltrow does. The film is doomed.
The evidence:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82dDnv9zeLs
Submitted by shakemykitty on Fri, 09/10/2010 - 1:11pm.
Amen. GRITs is in the Southern Lit section of my personal library,the humor subcategory. Wouldn't the lady who sings 'Here For The Party" and "Redneck Woman" be smashing in a film like this? It looks like a deep fried version of All About Eve crossed with The Rose and A Star is Born.
OT: Gwyneth Paltrow is less attractive and less gifted than her mother,though she can sing. Not even her most rabid fans could find her believable as a guitar slinging GRIT.
"She broke my heart, I broke her jaw"
Now folks, THAT is country music, not this crap!
*barf*
Frank deCaro and Doria beat the shit out of this mess this morning. Doria apparently hates Gwynnie. I do too, and even George Strait making a cameo couldn't get me to watch this shit.
And Tim McGraw -- do you sing any more, Bubba? Or are you Mr. Hollywood now?
As MK would say, Fuck. Ery.
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"Heinous fuckery most foul, lad. Heinous fuckery most foul." ~~Christopher Moore
Back when I heard that Gwynnie would be playing a country music star, I just assumed the movie would be pretty bad . . . looks like I was right!!! This thing looks like a bunch of cliche crap. I guess they couldn't afford any real co-stars. And they are releasing it in January!! That alone speaks volumns. Only the throw-away movies are released in January. My poor Gwynnie. Her acting career is just about dunzo. I hope GOOP is working out for her.
This film seems offensive to southerners; people who can act; people who like good movies and generally people with brains. This is some pretentious shit if I ever I saw it.
Positive? Gywneth isn't the worse singer I've ever heard.
"Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped"
- Elbert Hubbard
Also, I recently read an interview in which she complained that the shoot was "difficult" because she didn't want her kids on set so they wouldn't be exposed to "Mommy being naked, drunk, beaten, etc." so they were forced to ride their electric Hummers around the parking lot all day with their nannies instead.
I had a good laugh over that one.
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“Change in a trice. The lilies and languors of virtue. For the raptures and roses of vice;”
What a steaming pile of shit. Those are the worst fake country accents I've heard in awhile. Also Fish can carry a tune but her voice isn't all that.
I meeeean I hate to say it but I really want to see this movie. Sigh. Although when she's strutting around on stage at the end I did LOL. It's kind of like Crazy Heart with a little Mindy McCready Behind the Music thrown in. Bravo!
Submitted by Rdeadline on Fri, 09/10/2010 - 12:47pm.
Louise Brookes--
The star wasn't a brunette but she was one of the big stars of tv and movies. I wish I remembered. Ann Margret? The woman who played a cop in police woman? somebody must know!
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Was it maybe like The Tanya Tucker Story? I seem to remember she and Glen Campbell were on everything and totally off the rails back in the day.
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“Change in a trice. The lilies and languors of virtue. For the raptures and roses of vice;”
Flop is written all over this shit. Blog about that, fishy.
I like the tag, "why are you pulling my dick?"
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POOP (nourish the inner asshole)- MK
I smell a country-fried train wreck.
I'm too lazy to figure it out, but does anyone know who plays the cougar-bait boytoy singer?
Country singing isn't for her but girl can sing, I'll give her that .
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Dark-sided!
It was for sure made in the 80's and on abc or cbs. When I get home tonight I'm going to look for it because now I'm thinking about flying chicken!