Baby Chupa Is On Its Way (Maybe)!
Rachel "Chupcabra" Zoe's womb might be as small as a hallowed out raisin, but someway somehow a fetus has managed to squeeze itself in there. Hey, I've lived in apartments so small that I was able to take a dump while making my twin bed at the same time, so I have no sympathy for chupa fetus. Suck it up, chupa fetus! But not lit-er-ally, because that could make her raisin womb even smaller.
So...all last season on The Rachel Zoe Project, Chupa's husband Roger kept begging her for a baby. And not the kind of baby she brings home in the middle of the night to feed from on the bathroom floor. NO! A baby of their very own. Well, flip that hair, Roger, because a source tells OK! Magazine that Chupa is now eating for one!
This source says that 39-year-old (yeah, I know you want to see the receipts) Chupa is whispering to her closest friends that she's 3-months knocked up. The source went on to say, “But now that she’s pregnant, she’s telling people that this is something that she and Roger have wanted for many years and she’s finally at a level of success where she can afford to take some time off. She’s going to be going on maternity leave from full time styling immediately after this year’s Academy Awards, and doesn’t expect to work again until early fall at the earliest. She and Rodger are especially happy and Rachel, who can normally be quite emotionless, even teared up a few times as she started letting people in on the news.”
Don't tear up, Chupa! That's less nourishment for the chupa baby! Yeah, I don't really know how this happened either since I doubt Chupa even lets Roger cum in her out of fear that she'll gain more calories. Hell, she probably doesn't even let him bust some man chowder on her skin, because the cum calories could get into her system through her pores! This will be interesting.
And their baby is totally going to look like this:
Lock up your newborn babies in a Chinese Laundry or Payless shoe box, because there's going to be a new chupa waiting to snatch them by the neck! Yeah, Chupa won't get near anything related to Chinese Laundry.
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Submitted by boston61 on Fri, 10/01/2010 - 2:53pm.
Submitted by MyFingersHurt on Fri, 10/01/2010 - 1:28pm.
MyFingersHurt
It's not ignorant. I agree the world would be a much better place if fewer people reproduced. I'm just saying that almost everyone who ever told me they would never have children did. And, they are also usually the ones who are all of a sudden so "busy" and self important afterwards. JMHO
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I see what you mean. I guess I think that those people usually end up having kids because it's "the thing to do" once you're married, etc., and they start getting family pressure; I don't see it as them deciding that they actually want kids, which is sad to me. I know SOME people change their minds about wanting/not wanting kids, and that's all fine & dandy, but I guess I just feel bad for the people who truly don't want children & are always told by others, "Oh, you will. Just wait. You'll want kids someday." Like they know better...
Wiki says she was born in 1971. That would make her 39. I don't think she would be pregnant if she was 48 (1962). Life is weird. You can't tell. Some people chain smoke cigarettes and live to be 110. Others who are health nuts will die of lung cancer young. You really can't tell a person's health just by looking at them.
Children are a blessing and I hope this story is true... I also hope the baby looks like a Chupacabra... sorry! Adderroll + Baby = can't fathom it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SX2KzqM3qU
This aging anorexic probably has a surrogate mother on the side now that she is ready for the birth of her new baby accessory. Not back to work until next fall? Just amazing and hard to believe.
MK, u xtra dumb for that picture of the baby to be. LOL. U ain't right!
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""...if he offered to lick on my vagina bone it would be plastered on his face like that monster in Alien. Just sayin...."- Submitted by Global-Traveler of DListed
39? That's passing strange. When I first started hearing of her, she was two years older than me. Now I'm the one getting older, but she's the one aging...bazinga.
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Really don't mind if you sit this one out
My words but a whisper, your deafness a shout
--Jethro Tull
Ugh, you could play the xylophone on her chest. There is no way any straight dude on the planet can look at that bony chest and think sexynasty thoughts.
http://girlunemployed.blogspot.com
how is chupa pregnant? there's no way she gets periods...
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don't slap me cuz i'm not in the mood....
I think in order to get an employer recommendation, Brad had to donate some juice b4 he left----so it's really his kid. I mean really People---- Hubby Justin Bieber, Sr just doesn't look up to the task now, does he?
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"She's Black & I'm Gay--- we create culture."
she is not 39, she is 49
rodger with a d is not straight
she does not want a kid (which is fine).
if she is knocked up, whose egg is it - Brad G.'s?
Hold on a sec! Hasn't this woman been 39 for the past several years? And I'm not even having a dig or being snarky. I'm sure I read on here a couple of years ago that she was 39.
And can you imagine the horror she will go through gaining pregnancy weight. It would be her worst nightmare.
There is the brink of insanity and then there is the ABYSS. Ol' raisin-face was born in 1962.
You do the math.
Hubby Zoe's hair does not match his face. He kinda reminds me of Patrick Dempsey...with Justin Bieber hair. Not cool.
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"Leavin', on a southern train
Only yesterday, you lied
Promises of what I seemed to be
Only watch the time go by
All of these things you said to me"
Submitted by MyFingersHurt on Fri, 10/01/2010 - 1:28pm.
MyFingersHurt
It's not ignorant. I agree the world would be a much better place if fewer people reproduced. I'm just saying that almost everyone who ever told me they would never have children did. And, they are also usually the ones who are all of a sudden so "busy" and self important afterwards. JMHO
Submitted by The Mad Catter on Fri, 10/01/2010 - 12:31pm.
Mad Catter
Your avatar is truly frightening. I thought you were a drag queen not a woman.
LOL
i hope she's pregnant only to see the lady gain some weight. i can't believe she is married though... still baffles me. her show is boring, can't imagine having to live full time with the vacant air noise that shoots out of her head all day.
If 72 year old shriveled up Indian women can have babies, why not Chupa? Only, the Indian baby has a better home and probably more normal, loving mother.
I am married and I don't have children and I never wanted them. I come from a family of nine kids.
In fact, I am in the middle of menopause now that I am in my 40s, and all I have to say is:
I MADE IT! WOO HOO! No more periods and no more worrying about kids! Thank God almighty!
I like her alot, so if she is pregnant, i wish her the best.
Now the snarker in me doubts that she has had a period since Highschool, but if she is pregnant, i hope she takes care of herself and fucking eats.
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I fixed dinner, i get bottom. I called it!!
Submitted by MyFingersHurt on Fri, 10/01/2010 - 1:28pm.
OT: I call BS on this story. I truly don't think Rachel is physically capable of carrying a baby, and if you saw the season finale of her show, she was apparently too scared of needles to even get a blood test at the doctor... I don't see her going through IVF & all that shit. Or childbirth.
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She isn't scared of needles, I suspect the bitch was afraid what might come out on-cam from her use of "needles"! This is probably why she wanted to get tested on another day and, possibly, off-cam. But you are right, she is incapable of having a child. But, here is my take on why? She would starve the child to death since she has no concept of feeding and eating.
While I love Chupa, I have to see it to believe it.
Not believing it just yet.
Submitted by sugar free on Fri, 10/01/2010 - 11:11am.
somewhere Guliana Rancic is wondering how all these superskinny chicks are getting knocked up.
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She did get pregnant and miscarried. Sad.
While breeding is deeply tatooed into out genes, there are buttloads of people who honestly don't want children and do a pretty good job in keeping their life as they want it to be. It's OK to say you don't want kiddies for a while, then deciding to breed as long as said decision is made responsibly and fully aware of the changes in lifestyle and personal sacrifices involved. What I hate is assholes and asholettes who pressure their partners into breeding, when it's clear that the partner doesn't like children. Ugh!.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
Submitted by boston61 on Fri, 10/01/2010 - 12:05pm.
I never believe people who say they don't want them. Most of us who don't have them are gay or single.
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That's a really ignorant & misinformed statement. PLENTY of people really don't want children - and plenty more have children simply because it's "what you're supposed to do" & end up being terrible parents. I say BRAVO to people who recognize that they'd be happier without kids (and then take the necessary steps to remain child-free). There is way too much stigma in our culture around couples who don't want kids - they're cold, they hate children, will end up lonely, they're selfish, etc. There are plenty of excellent reasons to not have kids. And let's be honest, the world doesn't need more humans so making more is purely out of selfish desires. "Selfish" is not meant to be derogatory because I think that I *do* want kids, but there are LOTS of "ethically responsible" reasons to NOT have kids, besides just the personal desire to not be a parent.
Personally, I never really thought I wanted them, but now in my mid-twenties, I'm starting to think, "Hmmm, maybe I do see my life with children." We'll see what final decision my boyfriend & I make later on, but I have several friends & family members who really don't want kids & are very happy/fulfilled without them.
OT: I call BS on this story. I truly don't think Rachel is physically capable of carrying a baby, and if you saw the season finale of her show, she was apparently too scared of needles to even get a blood test at the doctor... I don't see her going through IVF & all that shit. Or childbirth.
lol @ "now eating for one!"
Submitted by boston61 on Fri, 10/01/2010 - 12:05pm.
I never believe people who say they don't want them
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Uhh, TRUST ME, there are plenty of people who DON'T want children at all and live their lives happily without ever having them. I go back and forth, but I'm leaning toward "no" on popping out crotchprogeny.
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19 Cats and Counting!
THE FULL RELEASE LOOP
What the underlying loop inside all of this really is
1974 someone used satellite time and brain cephalics (same thing), to view me, in 19764
The sound of the BR
She's 39 the way Chelsea Handler is 35.
You make me hate my hips! I hate my hips!
Her husband looks like a gayer Keith Urban...
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"Hollywood is like life, you face it with the sum total of your equipment."
-Joan Crawford
I never believe people who say they don't want them. Most of us who don't have them are gay or single. Having children while being single is very uncool and a recipe for poverty. I don't think Rodger is gay. Don't know why people say that. Now Gavin R. is gay. IMHO
Bless you M.K. for that precious baby thing you made for us this morning.
I think it sucks to be married to A)someone who is gay and B)someone who clearly wants children while you loathe them.
My husband and I discussed way before marriage that we didnt want children. Won't be having them either. Im glad we dont have to have those uncomfortable, pressuring talks like I've seen this woman go through. Nothing wrong with loving your career like she does and not wanting anything to do with being a mom. We're not all called to do it.
Perhaps Dr Murray used propofol on her then Roger emptied the turkey baster into her raisin. I cant imagine them bumping uglies, her hip bones could do damage.
the sun is def not shining, unless it's shining in MK mind! This weather SUCKS!
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►I'm a free bitch, baby◄
"Give me a red velvet with a heaping sprinkling of FUCK on top!" MK
I guess the sun is shining Michael, you are at the top of your form today!
That is just WRONG on so many levels!
somewhere Guliana Rancic is wondering how all these superskinny chicks are getting knocked up.
Catter: more from "the source": “Rachel even requests that clients don’t bring their children to fittings at her studio, so there’s never been any real clue that this is something she was longing for, a source adds.
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►I'm a free bitch, baby◄
"Give me a red velvet with a heaping sprinkling of FUCK on top!" MK
Nicole Richie got pregnant while she herself was at fetal weight...then again she's not an ageless demon.
Nah, Rachel is OK. She's vapid and anorexic but she does pursue her true passion and I can't hate on that. If she is knocked up, I wish her luck. Something tells me that she just straight up has no desire to procreate, not just due to the getting fat aspect. If she is harboring a miracle monster, I hope it's what she wants! Once you pop it out, you can't stop it.
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19 Cats and Counting!
THE FULL RELEASE LOOP
What the underlying loop inside all of this really is
1974 someone used satellite time and brain cephalics (same thing), to view me, in 19764
The sound of the BR
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Fri, 10/01/2010 - 10:46am.
ESE!!!!!!! Como estas? Hugs and hello to you and everyone else! I mostly just lurk now!
Nothing else on topic. Oh yes, Chupacabras lurk!
Enjoy the tacos!
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I miss you Sparky:
http://www.petco.com/content/StoriesMemorialWallDetails.aspx?featurestor...
Rudeness is a weak man's imitation of strenght.
An Eye for an Eye Leaves Everybody Blind!
Save a
There is no way this bitch is pregnant. Even if she was, she is incapable of carrying a baby to full term. She is anorexic.
This thing is a stylist? How? I see nothing stylish about her. And no way is this bitch the same age as I am. Next!
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley
Submitted by vanyvrgs on Fri, 10/01/2010 - 10:35am
vany!!!!.... hi... yeah, that's all i got... i just haven't seen ya in a bit
i got nothing on-topic... don't worry, i'm out the door to go grocery shopping... guess who's making tacos tonight?!
OT: uummm... yeah, uh... she wouldn't eat tacos
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
No wonder Brad left. Looks like the next season is going to be about her having a couture baby and her going on and on about how busy she is planning for the baby. Kill. me. now. ____________________________________________
I miss you Sparky:
http://www.petco.com/content/StoriesMemorialWallDetails.aspx?featurestor...
Rudeness is a weak man's imitation of strenght.
An Eye for an Eye Leaves Everybody Blind!
39!!!!
ahaaaaahaaaaahaaaaa
Girlfriend please
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Nothing says "real love" like matching mug shots. -Michael Kay
how is that possible? bitch needs to eat first
Yada, yada, yada. Not interesting to me. I'm still trying to figure out how were they able to botox the shit out of the rest of her face, but can't hit a few shots around her mouth?? This is the real mystery.
39? Only if you add 20 to it. No way in hell is she that age and her being pregnant? No, just no.
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"In other news, the University of Color Me Surprised released a report today which states that water is indeed wet. Mind. Boggled" - Michael K, who else?
Bitch survives on the life source of virgin girls, not food.
Love how everybody is claiming IVF and all. What if she's pulling a Revolta and has a secret surrogate. You know Chupa would never dream of putting on actual weight.
So, did she use the same magic dust sprinkled on her uterus as Skeletina?
Malnourished cuntbagfucksticks like them can not conceive without IVF....
True fact right there. Yuh huh.
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I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.