Shawty Mane Will Bust A Cap In Yo Pampers
Justin Bieber isn't old enough to operate a water gun (check the age recommendation on the box if you don't believe me) and he's as threatening as a Maisy Mouse stuffed animal, but that hasn't stopped him from already choosing the gangsta way of life. You better get on your side of the playground or Shawty Mane is going to fuck you up when the recess warden isn't looking! You don't want to end up with a SpongeBob Squarepants Band-Aid over your knees after the Bieb finishes swinging. Or you can just bend down a little bit and put your palm on his forehead so his tiny fists won't you hit. Yeah, do that.
CBC News brings us this hilarious report out of Richmond, B.C. about 16-year-old Justin Bieber and his posse getting kicked out of a laser tag center after he allegedly smacked a 12-year-old during a game. Toddler on toddler violence is never okay, but this is just HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. The owner of the laser tag center said they put The Lesbeaver and his bodyguards out on curb after the 12-year-old complained.
The Richmond police department's fetus crime unit is investigating this mess, but Justin's spokeswhore denies it went down like this. Shawty Mane is still at large so you better stay in your playpens until further notice.
We all know that Justin is the true reincarnation of Biggie Smalls, but he would never ever hit a 12-year-old. The real story is that Shawty Mane ordered his bodyguards to hold the 12-year-old down while he tickled the boy until the poor thing made a tinkle in his Underdoos. That's how Shawty Mane does it! "Every time you see that pee pee stain, you're going to be reminded about the time you effed with Shawty Mane!" - Shawty Mane
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Dammmn. What a 'gangsta'. I'm scurred ... **rolling eyes**
Yup.
Whamo's Canadian?
As for the beat down, pics or it didn't happen...
OOOOooooh, the plot thickens.
So the 12 year old's dad is some lawsuit happy lawyer, who's probably not making as much money now as he was promised to be making (when in laws school) before the recession and all that shit hit the fan?
Got it.
The victim's dad's mad that he didn't think that pimping his kid to Disney would have been a better financial route few years back and now he's mad @ LesBeaver, cuz his parents were smart enough to go that way and pimp their son's butt to whichever entertainment exec thought of the best marketing pack at the right time, right?
Edit: no need to apologize, Canada. You're very good, if underrated, people.
Just like the rest of us, non celebrity folks, who go by doing our own thing, without the bollox and so on.
On behalf of all Canadians I apologise for having sent this little magical unicorn into the world. We have so many good bands and singers here in Canada and yet we'll for ever be known as the country that produced the Lesbeaver. Oh for shame!
Hey, I am a fetus hater, but just want to let you know that the local (as in Richmond/Van) news mentioned that the "victim's" Dad is a greedy lawyer type. FYI.
Wow - Auntie Mame -- OOPS - I mean Shawty Mane - is a total badass.
I remember picking up my 10-year old from karate class and thinking "My kid can kick his ass - I wonder if he plays Laser Tag in LA???"
Watch out, Taylor Momsen!
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"The show will be a mix of serious news stories and pop culture shit. It will also feature a daily cameo by a crazed and foaming at the mouth gay who will storm the set in a bridal tuxedo" MK
Submitted by onthefringe on Sun, 10/17/2010 - 8:54pm.
Ooooo - he gansta! Not quite an Antoine Dodson though...
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yep, he's the kinda gangsta that when you lose your pudding.... he MIGHT have a say in it.
not saying that you'll get your pudding back, but... he'll be there to tell you how many calories are in pudding!
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."
this tiny prick needs to be bought down a peg or ten
Ooooo - he gansta! Not quite an Antoine Dodson though...
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The real life horror of Monsanto: David vs Monsanto
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E42ndfjnP1g
LMAO!!!! one of the best posts ever! LMAO all the way through the fuckaaaaaaaaa ahahahahaha
Coma Caca!
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You can't even write this stuff. Bieber beating up a twelve year old at a laser tag event? ROFL. What a douche. The 12 year old kid should have kicked his ass.
Shawty Mane is the worst name ever if i didn't like him i despise him , i guess they are trying to make him like a hard shit because he looks so innocent .
☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼☼
“I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you” Friedrich Nietzsche
HAHAHA!!!!
This sure as hell made me laugh after a 13hrs shift today.
Never change, LesBeaver, never change. Keep on keeping it realz and smackin' those 12 y.o's.
This kid needs a whoopin.
Also, doesn't this lil' bitch look like a pre-surgicized St. Angie circa FoxFire times? Dead ringer no?
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Can't we just put him through a meat grinder and make sausages out of him? What??? You know those would be some tender and tasty sausages, don't front....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Who is rikki?
laser tag is so hardcore. his first date, which HAS to be with taylor momsen, should take place at a laser tag center.
Poor little lesbeaver (oh, excuse me, tough guy Shawty Mane). Gotta show "you be HARD" by slapping a 12 year old. This little pussy is about as gangsta as beyonce's alter ego, sasha fierce. And about as manly as well...
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"I've never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don't like eating fish. And I know that's very popular out there in Africa." - Brit's Tits
Will everyone chill the F-out?! This kid has like one more year of pre-pubescent, annoying, pop-tart, sing-along songs left then it's Aaron Carter/Leif Garret/Donny Osmond/Celebrity Rehab territory..it's not like he's gonna grow up to be the next Michael Jackson or anything.
"No One Makes Me Bleed My Own Blood!"
Sorry if someone else mentioned this but TMZ says that the 12 year old repeatedly kept calling him a "faggot"...I bet that really irks him.
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and I was helping children in Morocco, it wasn't like a vacation...
I sure hope The Bieb is partaking in BC's famous agricultural commodity.
Justin fills a void. The one left when the white suburban Kohl's-dressed mall girls and their grandmothers realized that Clay Aiken wasn't really good dating material after all.
Somebody shake their rattle at this wee bastard.
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"When I look at these pictures, I don't hear music, I hear the creaky sound of the Four Horsemen's stable door slowly opening ..."
This kid really needs to have the shit kicked out of him.
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Are we in love, or just friends?
Is this my beginning, or is this the end?
The 3 Degrees -"When will I see you again?"
God, this little lisping fucker is at it again:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=iv&annotation_id=annotation_184766&...
Why do all these kids have lisps?:
http://www.youtube.com/user/ericDouglace#p/a/u/1/Mh2z2Cma3xQ
This little bitch needs a smack across the chops.
Sucky 12/14/09 Motherfucker, I lick pits for a living
LawDog 03/15/2010 Leenie, LOL. I think we can all agree that I am the most important person ever Salacious 7/15/10 Thank you Leenie! You made me smile like a 19th century whore who got overpaid
Submitted by justincase on Sun, 10/17/2010 - 2:52pm.
Thanks MK for reminding me why I have avoided CBC for the last two years. I listen to the French radio version (Radio Canada) so that if they mention Lezbeaver it will be easier not to listen and because they don't mention him anyway. Win, win!
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Yeah, I hear you re CBC;I'd rather drink bleach then listen to CBC. It's so far up its own arse, full of pretentious, "hip" djs and old farts, droning on in soothing tones about nothing. Love RC.
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Trick Pony
"She is fat and I am cross- eyed with bad skin. We all have flaws. Hers is the fatness."
Im really surprised stupid people like this wanna be dyke and Taylor whoreface do not get choked on the reg when they walk out in public!
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Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
Just checked in to read the weekend "news". Promptly went to the newspaper, both paper and online, and guess what? Vancouver does not give a shit. Couldn't find this anywhere.
YAY!!!!!!
Submitted by Bunnyman on Sun, 10/17/2010 - 2:30pm.
Will someone just go ahead and kill this little retro-abortion already? He's getting REALLY annoying.
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co-sign
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Submitted by Lurker on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 7:03pm.
Submitted by Pamela on Sun, 06/27/2010 - 6:51pm
damn girl, you tell it like it is!!!
Who is his audience? My nephews who are 10 and 15 both hate this kid. They tell me that nobody in their school listens to his "music."
Thanks MK for reminding me why I have avoided CBC for the last two years. I listen to the French radio version (Radio Canada) so that if they mention Lezbeaver it will be easier not to listen and because they don't mention him anyway. Win, win!
**For crying out loud, my 84 year old mother is being brainwashed and is enamoured with this little rodent just because she likes his haircut**
From the neck up that look reminds me of photos of some 1930's starlet leaving or arriving at the studio. I'm surprised it passes for "street". Looks more Faye Dunaway playing Joan Crawford to me.
Will someone just go ahead and kill this little retro-abortion already? He's getting REALLY annoying.
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"You were convicted of indecent exposure for the third time."
"I was promoting the art of dance."
"With nude loitering, nude and disorderly conduct, and nude drunken driving?"
"I was not drunk. I was ON PILLS!"
Next we'll be hearing about him snorting coke in the Chuckie Cheese restroom.
Ok, enough pontificating, I need some liquor.
-LOVE ANDERSON
Submitted by Whatever on Sun, 10/17/2010 - 2:11pm.
He and Taylor Momsen should totally hook-up. They have things in common.
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I was thinking the same thing. These two bitches are sooo hardcore. It would be a tabloid wet dream coupling from hell that would keep me in LOLZ for at least a year. Pleeeaaassse, somehow this has to happen.
Ok, enough pontificating, I need some liquor.
-LOVE ANDERSON
He and Taylor Momsen should totally hook-up. They have things in common.
It's probably for the best that this kid isn't in a normal high school setting. He's just so gosh-darned tiny. I gotta hand it to him, he's genuinely picking on someone his own size.
Maybe he'll grow, but his head is so little (the one we can see). Anthony Michael Hall was small, but his head size indicated that he was due for a growth spurt--he had a bobblehead look.
This kid, on the other hand, is still too small for his Ray-Bans and hat. Look at his little jacket! It's almost adorable, until I remember that he's permitted to drive and is an insufferable little guy.
I'll never forget the article about him in the NYT when he was first getting popular, where his mother wished out loud that he'd become a Christian artist, and expressed her initial worry that the manager interested in representing him was Jewish (and thus unlikely to have an interest in pushing him to the Christian market). It was a very odd thing to say. Why not just note that the only guy interested wanted to rep him for the mainstream market instead? I guess we should be glad that the kid is just a pain in the ass, and not an overtly anti-Semitic pain in the ass.
You're killin' me, MK! "Toddler on toddler violence" - LMAO!
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"All the girls in the club wanna know
Where did all their pretty boys go?"
really don't get it with this one. at all.
ROFLMAO @ "Shawty Mane will bust a cap in yo pampers". I read the same story on TMZ and didn't think it was funny or worth commenting and then come here and see this shiz is hilarious. MK you are the god of Celebrity Snark. LOL, luv this site.
Aha! I see his parents' plans to control his money by the time he's 21 are working out nicely. Only a few more years till she's shaving her head and smacking pappz w/umbrellas.
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I'd like to flay you with my rapier wit, but I'm afraid it's about as dull as fucking your mother.
Submitted by sweetblueberrys...
Who plays Laser Tag by themselves?
Am I the only one who finds it kinda pathetic he had to go play it with 2 paid grown ass men?
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LOL...Exactly. Maybe he's one of those sad celebs whose only friends are the people that work for them.
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You're welcome to your opinion unless it differs from mine.
This BITCH. who smacks a little kid? jerkoff.
That having been said, laser tag was the shit...it was all the rage for birthday parties in elementary school.
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"I'm like a tree, I feed the branches of the people." - Kanye West
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Sun, 10/17/2010 - 1:11pm.
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Sun, 10/17/2010 - 12:59pm.
Soooooo, Laser tag is still around?
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*shoots Evil_Cupcake in the frosting*... yup, it's still around!
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OUCH!
Hey ESE!
Gotta head to store for beer. Making my famous Cupcake chili (even if it is 80 degrees out!) and beer is my secret ingredient!
Later! ; )
this kid makes me want to vomit ...
I don't know when or where it will happen, but the schadenfreude monitors all over the world are gonna be overloaded when this self-absorbed fetus finally gets his public comeuppance!
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Sun, 10/17/2010 - 12:59pm.
Soooooo, Laser tag is still around?
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*shoots Evil_Cupcake in the frosting*... yup, it's still around!
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"I could listen to a babbling brook,
and hear a song that I could understand.
I keep wishing it could be that way.
Because my world would be a Wonderland."