Open Post: Hosted By John Lennon's Angry Laundry Letter
Letters of Note (via TDW) says that long before the days of OxiClean and stains sticks, John Lennon raged at whoever did his laundry for turning his crisp white shirt into a shade of yellah. Before the laundress could throw the blame at Mrs. Yoko Ono Lennon, John let it be known that this is impossible since "Orientals" don't spit out as much sweat as everybody else.
Since my abuelita called me a "chinito" for years the "Oriental" thing doesn't really bother me, but this is the first I'm hearing about Asians having the sweat glands of a cat! Interesting. So John is telling me that if an Asian did jumping jacks in a hot sauna while reading an audit letter from the IRS, they would barely get wet? Hmmm. Well, I obviously didn't inherit that shit since I sometimes sweat like a sober call girl around Charlie Sheen. I don't mind, though. Sweat is nature's lube (after saliva, of course).
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'Oriental' is considered a somewhat of a slur and/or politically incorrect in the U.S. but in UK, "Asian" and "Oriental" are both used to mean different peoples, geographically speaking. John Lennon was British, so there's nothing odd about him using the term.
But wtf does Yoko dyeing her hair (or not) and sweating (or not) have to do with his shirt turning yellow?? LOL
Submitted by bambam on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 10:22pm.
Unbelievable. Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch is baaaack.
Straight up drunk as a matter a fact.
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I do bitch better than you do, mama's boy.
It's fucking true, for most Chinese anyway. I've dated several Chinese guys (rice queen) and they don't have a single stick of deodourant in their house because they don't stink. They sweat but it's practically rose water. FML
My mom calls Asians "Orientals."
We're always horrified and like, "MOM! It's ASIANS, not Orientals! That's racist!"
She does try, she says Asians and Orientals, now. She just says she grew up with that term and it's hard to change.
She's not prejudiced at all.
Is "Oriental" really racist?
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"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Plato
Submitted by nightowl on Thu, 10/28/2010 - 3:32am.
No way! You should party for free. Just be careful. In an OP last week, I told the sordid story of getting thrown out of a leather bar in the Castro on Halloween. Someone spiked my drink-or maybe it was meant for Mr. W.- back in 1999, after the Civic Center street party shifted to Boystown. Not only did I become so ill that I spent the night in the ER, I have not been able to swallow a sip of hard liquor since.
Homemade costumes are the way to go. My favorite adult costume was the fake riding habit-boots,jodhpurs or cigarette trousers,tweed or plaid blazer,hair tucked into a snood,blouse,tie,small black bowler,white gloves. Mr W and I did the tart and vicar thing when we were dating. Very shocking, as my usual look is so plain that Mr. W. calls it painted Amish or spicy librarian.
Have a very good night, nightowl.
★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
Come with me upon the scaffold.
I will lead you through the horror.
Look inside executioner's hood,
I will show you his grimace.
I think my computer's about to shut down. I'll talk to you tomorrow Khensu. Goodnight!
Submitted by nightowl on Thu, 10/28/2010 - 3:32am.
The boat does sound like a cool idea, but $35 is way out of range for that kind of thing, IMO.
I don't know what to wear.
★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
Come with me upon the scaffold.
I will lead you through the horror.
Look inside executioner's hood,
I will show you his grimace.
Submitted by Khensu Hetep on Thu, 10/28/2010 - 2:54am.
My sister invited me to a Halloween party with her friend on Saturday.
I really want to meet guys, but I don't know if I want to go.
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You should go! I have plans, kind of, but I haven't called ANY of my friends to see what they're doing. A friend from my class invited me to a party on a boat but I have to pay 35 bucks. I don't think I want to go there. I wanna party for free!
My sister invited me to a Halloween party with her friend on Saturday.
I really want to meet guys, but I don't know if I want to go.
★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
Come with me upon the scaffold.
I will lead you through the horror.
Look inside executioner's hood,
I will show you his grimace.
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 8:55pm.
Submitted by salacious on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 6:28pm.
What do you slores think of this story?
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CSG, don't know if you're still here but I'll reply anyway.
I'm thinking the same thing. He's probably done this before. Someone else said that she must have been a really good looking 49 year old to turn down the offer. The guy apologized and all, so it's not like he was going to rape her. If he really had "regulars" with that fugly face, then I believe there's hope for all of us. :D
Here's the link: http://nyc.barstoolsports.com/random-thoughts/does-this-look-like-the-fa...
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"Sal, darling, you are the reason some women go gay. ♥" - Submitted by Dog on Fri, 07/09/2010 - 6:32pm.
"life is precious, you must not have watched The Lion King, you heartless fuck"
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 1:15pm.
OMG, that is fucking HILARIOUS!
Ya know, back then it was perfectly acceptable to call Asians "Orientals" and Latinos "Hispanic". I don't know why these things are insults now. It's not like "chink" or "spic".
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For real. My parents came from Mexico and I often call myself Hispanic. I didn't know it was considered an insult until you mentioned it. Crazy.
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Thu, 10/28/2010 - 1:43am.
We are doing special effects stuff. Bruises, wounds etc. I want to dress up for Halloween but I haven't decided on a costume yet. I wanted to be a "hipster cliche" or a zombie (homemade costumes of course) but I haven't decided.
Today I found a pirate dress I used a couple of years ago when I went as a rag doll. The dress has neutral colors and added other clothing items in all sorts of pastel colors. Maybe I'll repeat that costume...
Insomniac butting in:
As a hardcore rock lover, I eased into loving the blues with Robert Cray. I also love some John Hiatt, who may be considered country, but not in my world since I hate country (except for some early Dwight Yoakum and Dixie Chicks).
Submitted by nightowl on Thu, 10/28/2010 - 1:15am.
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Hi Nightowl! I'm doing good. I don't have to work until 2nd shift tomorrow and decided to come on to dlisted for some laughs. I think that was about 6 hours ago. Between MK's story descriptions and the posters comments, I've been hopping around to the different threads laughing like crazy all night.
ETA - what kind of Halloween makeup are you going to do? That sounds like fun.
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Thu, 10/28/2010 - 12:58am.
You did! but for some reason, at school they leave the first A out.
Classes are going great. I'm almost halfway through and have already had 2 paying clients!
We have a mockboard to practice for the board exam on monday and tuesday. We are supposed to do Halloween make-up on friday.
How have you been?
Hi Nightowl! How are the aesthetician courses going? (Did I spell "aesthetician" right?)
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Hi CSG!
Submitted by antibitch on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 9:45pm.
Hi anti and everybody else!
Submitted by kokoskitten on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 11:18pm.
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 11:10pm.
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Thanks CSG !! (see my response to A.cotw for the b-day report a couple posts back). Anyway I love reading your posts as well as you seem really kind, intelligent, and grounded.
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Hey it ain't a party til something gets broke or someone gets sick! Hope Mr Koko is feeling better now. It sounds like you had fun.
Thanks for your kind words, posters like you keep me coming back to dlisted.
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 11:11pm.
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 10:59pm.
Never so much as heard of the "Black Snake Moan"... I'm guessing it's a movie? Me no know. But I LOVES me some blues! I'm checking more Black keys songs on the tube of U right now... they're not bad, bluesy with a dash of White stripes style rock mixed in. Not bad at all!
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M2C - "Black Snake Moan" was a movie starring Samuel L Jackson (LOVE HIM) and Christina Ricci. I'm with you on loving the blues, and have to tell you, if you want to get recommendations for the best blues, r&b and soul (which for me all sound great and roll together), you HAVE to get Bambam's recommendations. I swear, he should blog, post a column etc.
BAMBAM - PLEASE GIVE US YOUR "BEST OF THE BEST". I'm not kidding, if you could post your "Top 25" I would be in musical nirvana for the rest of my life! (And if you threw in a picture of your astounding nipplez, I would be "over the moon").
LOL - Luvs ya!
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 11:10pm.
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Thanks CSG !! (see my response to A.cotw for the b-day report a couple posts back). Anyway I love reading your posts as well as you seem really kind, intelligent, and grounded.
and I was helping children in Morocco, it wasn't like a vacation...
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 10:59pm.
Never so much as heard of the "Black Snake Moan"... I'm guessing it's a movie? Me no know. But I LOVES me some blues! I'm checking more Black keys songs on the tube of U right now... they're not bad, bluesy with a dash of White stripes style rock mixed in. Not bad at all!
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Khensu - you should go to the party and have fun! I hope you decide to go.
Submitted by A.cotw on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 10:48pm.
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I did, thanks for asking !! The one SLIGHT thing that happened was Mr.K threw up a tiny bit on the floor of the bar we always go to. He was partying way harder than I was...and I feel bad that we kind of ran out of there with a half ass clean-up after that (Sorry Bar X!) I imagine we won't be going there anytime soon. But all in all it was so much better than the past few years that involved all kinds of breakdowns, drama, and scandal.
and I was helping children in Morocco, it wasn't like a vacation...
M2C and Chica -- THANK YOU both for letting me know the name of the song. I plan on getting it tomorrow. From what I read, it was featured on "Black Snake Moan". I never saw the movie but will rent it now because I love the blues. Did either of you see the movie? Is it good? I love SLJ but missed this one.
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Submitted by A.cotw on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 10:38pm.
@CSG & Bjork:
The 24 year old masseur asked the 49 year old client if he wanted him to stop when his hands were on her ass. Perhaps that's a sign that he had some type of sexual contact with spa clients before. Around here (Northern CA), erogenous zones are left out during massages. Although I have a phobia about being touched by strangers, I love a good massage. The pros did not touch any sensitive place except my inner thighs. Friends with benefits are different story.
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You know what AC, now that you mention it, this whole story has a foot-tapping in the men's room feel to it. C'mon, if you have a problem with someones hands on your ass, you're gonna scream as soon as they make contact. I think the masseuse misjudged this client - he should have stuck to his regulars. I feel sorry for his regulars, because I can't believe it's easy to find this type of arrangement.
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 10:42pm.
Ha, I was late. You're right.
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 10:23pm.
It looks like that song is "When The Light Goes Out" by The Black Keys?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5KOs70Su_8s
Did you have a nice birthday,Koko?
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 10:10pm.
I think I just made a major Facebook error. I accepted a friend request from some chick I barely knew in high school this morning, just logged in now and my home page is flooded with pictures from her of her kids, trips etc. WTF? Are people that desperate for recognition that they arbitrarily contact people on FB and then basically set up their own fansite? Damn.
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I'm really starting to get freaked out by Facebook. I have maybe 6 or 7 pictures of myself, cats, husbands(typo it stays) on FB and I see people who I am 'friends' with thousands of pictures. I mean putting pictures up is fine but...oh, and some people I know have infinity amounts of friends. Don't get me wrong, I post stupid stuff as well but NEVER about how I hate my boss, co-worker etc. I have one friend who is a teacher who ranted post after post about how much she hated an aide in her classroom and detailed how she was trying to get rid of her. In my opinion not exactly the best idea.
and I was helping children in Morocco, it wasn't like a vacation...
catholicschoolhor, I believe dis is what you're lookin for:
The Black Keys - When The Lights Go Out
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9LnrSGyqBc&feature=related
Haven't heard much of their stuff, but I like this one too. And Girl Is On My Mind... heavily Jimmy Hendriks influenced. Not bad.
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@CSG & Bjork:
The 24 year old masseur asked the 49 year old client if he wanted him to stop when his hands were on her ass. Perhaps that's a sign that he had some type of sexual contact with spa clients before. Around here (Northern CA), erogenous zones are left out during massages. Although I have a phobia about being touched by strangers, I love a good massage. The pros did not touch any sensitive place except my inner thighs. Friends with benefits are different story.
BAM - I just posted a message to you, and here you are! It must be fate.
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
OK it seems like everyone checked out, so I'll just leave this for the late night/early am slores: can anyone help me track-down this tune? I love it and have tried to find it, but haven't turned up any results. It's the song Directv is using in their promo for Friday Night Lights:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IB1Kuode-_c
I feel I should specifically throw this to my DC-area meat-raisin music expert - C'mon Bam, if you don't know this one, no one does.
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Unbelievable. Bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch is baaaack.
Straight up drunk as a matter a fact.
I think I just made a major Facebook error. I accepted a friend request from some chick I barely knew in high school this morning, just logged in now and my home page is flooded with pictures from her of her kids, trips etc. WTF? Are people that desperate for recognition that they arbitrarily contact people on FB and then basically set up their own fansite? Damn.
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
ok ive decidedthis is lame so im gonna go passout now
Submitted by Bjork You on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 9:37pm.
Submitted by salacious: "...What do you slores think of this story?"
Like catholicschoogirl, I think there was a miscommunication. Homeboy's been doing that shit for awhile (4 years), and instead of getting Dina Lohan or Kim Zolciak, this time he got Nancy Grace or Phaedra. Oh well... (And yes, I leave you with that visual.)
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*Visualizes Nancy Grace getting a reverse reach-around...SCREAMS, PASSES OUT*
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Submitted by Hotmami on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 8:47pm.
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Hot - I'm sorry to hear about what happened, I hope the situation gets straightened out soon.
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Submitted by salacious: "...What do you slores think of this story?"
Like catholicschoogirl, I think there was a miscommunication. Homeboy's been doing that shit for awhile (4 years), and instead of getting Dina Lohan or Kim Zolciak, this time he got Nancy Grace or Phaedra. Oh well... (And yes, I leave you with that visual.)
Submitted by A.cotw on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 9:26pm.
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AC - As I was reading the story I was getting more and more angry, until I read the last part which said he worked there for four years. HUH????? So we're supposed to believe this was the very, very, very first time he pulled this trick and got caught? LOL, I suddenly pictured a bunch of cougars and Memaw's storming the RED DOORS and insisting he be hired back.
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
@ catholicschoolgirl :
LMAO! Thank you. Now I feel less guilty.My first thought was "Guess he rubbed her the wrong way."
Seriously, he probably has done this before, and thought the client was consenting to more than his hands kneading her ass. Do you think those customer satisfaction surveys were usually positive?
*sings Just a Gigolo*
@Hotmammi:
Everyone else I've mentioned it to rolled their eyes,laughed, and called me strange,warped,etc. Especially the intellectuals. The line is there. _As You Like It_ is extremely funny, and Lady Rosalind was a clever hot slut.
*passes homemade bread to Hotmammi*
Mr. Baker is the biggest villain in this case. I will be surprised if he and the stepmonster are not attacked within 20 minutes of entering the jailhouse.
Submitted by caprica six on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 7:44pm.
Alright, study brea... oh. Nevermind.
@Sucky, =D lool
@Eiles, I reported myself for being stinky in that post lol
*walks out post haste* *removes ALL liquor from thread*
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Cappy Girl - Hope the midterms aren't kicking your behind too hard. Hang in there and enjoy a pinot on me when you get a break!
*SMOOCHES*
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Submitted by antibitch on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 9:02pm.
i want some toast. and some dick. OR toasty brown dick.hahahahahahah
*dies*
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And I hear your words that I made up. You say my name like there could be an us. I'd best tidy up my head I'm the only one in love, I'm the only one in love.
Adele, "Heart to Stone"
csg, where'syour sexygirl avie, omg somebody is textin brnb
Submitted by A.cotw on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 8:59pm.
Submitted by Hotmami on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 8:23pm.
Ever notice that the phrase "my baby's daddy" has roots from Shakespeare? It's in _As You Like It_. When asked if her misery is for her father,
Lady Rosalind replies "No,some of it is for my child's father", meaning the young man she is in love with and hopes to marry.
I never knew that. Funny that such a tacky-sounding expression has roots in Shakespeare. We're having a typhoon today, and the wind is loud as shit.
Zahra's stepmonster should be left in general population with all the mothers. If the law doesn't take care of her, they sure as hell will.
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And I hear your words that I made up. You say my name like there could be an us. I'd best tidy up my head I'm the only one in love, I'm the only one in love.
Adele, "Heart to Stone"
i want some toast. and some dick. OR toasty brown dick.hahahahahahah
Submitted by Hotmami on Wed, 10/27/2010 - 8:23pm.
Ever notice that the phrase "my baby's daddy" has roots from Shakespeare? It's in _As You Like It_. When asked if her misery is for her father,
Lady Rosalind replies "No,some of it is for my child's father", meaning the young man she is in love with and hopes to marry.
I am completely horrified about Zahara Baker. Although I dislike violence, I'd like to break every bone in her stepmonster's body with that prosthetic leg. Her father deserves something even worse. Harming any child is inexcusable. Abusing, then murdering Zahara is completely evil.
Hi dlisted slores! Hope everyone is having an interesting evening.
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"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".