Hot Slut Of The Day!
Ben, the rare "panda cow" from Larimer County, Colorado. Farmer Chris Jessen already has a small menagerie of tiny animals including cattle and a kangaroo, so when he heard that you could breed a mini panda cow through genetic manipulation, he got on that shit right away. And that's how the miniature cow with Taylor Momsen eyes was born. Farmer Chris says that there's only 24 known panda cows in the world and they sell for up to $30,000 each.
You know, I'm not sure how to feel about genetic manipulation since that's how the Kardashian kreatures came to be, but look, it's a TINY PANDA COW! It can fart out cheese will eating bamboo. Oh shit, bamboo cheese! It can also let out a tiny moo while it pulls out your IV. Adorable.
And this means we're one step closer to creating a real-life PUSSY COW!
via Fark
• 
That is beautiful......what a strange and outrageous animal...truly God's miracle makings.
Awww, he's adorable.
It's not half panda. It's all cow bred to create the band. They're not that rare.
But he's a cute little shit. Kinda looks like Adam Lambert.
.
.
The panda cow reminds me of the miniature horse-why? Why do we need miniatures of large animals? What's next? Miniature whales and elephants? We already have miniature pigs that never took off. I call miniature pigs hors d'oeuvres.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 8:14pm.
YOU BITCH! No, ok...I'm sorry...You won fair and square...and as a gesture of my humility, I'd like to have you for dinner...I mean, have you over for dinner...Yes, now I'll need to know your approximate weight to adjust my oven...er, I mean...to adjust the menu to any dietary restrictions you may have...We've all over indulged over the holidays....and this special bbq sauce you speak of...You don't suppose you could mariade yourself in...er, I mean part with a bottle or two...for your hostess...?
_______________________________
LOLOLOLOLOLOL - you are too hilarious. This reminds me of one of my favorite Twilight Zone episodes (which was on last night during the TZ marathon on ScyFy - I was in geek heaven) - the "To Serve Man" episode. It's right up there with "Soylent Green". Classics.
______________________________
"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Submitted by catholicschoolgirl on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 8:05pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 7:38pm
I DON'T CARE!!! I WANT A PANDA COW NOW, NOW, NOW, NOW...AND I'M FEEDING THAT LIL' BASTID BAMBOO TOO!!!! SO BAMBOO YOU, MUTHA FUCKA... *huff, huff, huff...sips bloody mary to calm down*....;-)
_______________________________
Tiger - I've got first dibs on that precious little panda cow because I'm a human who promised him a warm, loving home...
*warms up grill, lovingly prepares special bbq sauce*
*************************************************
YOU BITCH! No, ok...I'm sorry...You won fair and square...and as a gesture of my humility, I'd like to have you for dinner...I mean, have you over for dinner...Yes, now I'll need to know your approximate weight to adjust my oven...er, I mean...to adjust the menu to any dietary restrictions you may have...We've all over indulged over the holidays....and this special bbq sauce you speak of...You don't suppose you could mariade yourself in...er, I mean part with a bottle or two...for your hostess...?
**********************************
Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 7:38pm
I DON'T CARE!!! I WANT A PANDA COW NOW, NOW, NOW, NOW...AND I'M FEEDING THAT LIL' BASTID BAMBOO TOO!!!! SO BAMBOO YOU, MUTHA FUCKA... *huff, huff, huff...sips bloody mary to calm down*....;-)
_______________________________
Tiger - I've got first dibs on that precious little panda cow because I'm a human who promised him a warm, loving home...
*warms up grill, lovingly prepares special bbq sauce*
_______________________________
"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Submitted by TimC on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 3:35pm.
Um, folks, he is not a scientist using genetic modification. The article says this is the result of crossing 8 different breeds of miniature cow over 44 years. They sure as hell weren't doing GM back in the 1960s. He's just using old fashioned selective breeding to try to get an animal with the traits he wants. He did not use panda genes to make his cow look like that. Sheesh, I know you've been hitting the mimosas and bloody mary's all morning, but this is redickyouless.
**********************************************
I DON'T CARE!!! I WANT A PANDA COW NOW, NOW, NOW, NOW...AND I'M FEEDING THAT LIL' BASTID BAMBOO TOO!!!! SO BAMBOO YOU, MUTHA FUCKA... *huff, huff, huff...sips bloody mary to calm down*....;-)
**********************************
Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by angel_i on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 2:33pm.
@Mrs. PC:
Does it really matter? Becuz it seems to me that he's also, most likely, a tinymeat.
_______________________________
Angle - I just received this cryptic email:
TO: CSG
FROM: Undisclosed Recipient
This is to confirm that Farmer Jessen is a tiny meat with a God complex. Nudez are attached.
*MOO*
_______________________________
"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
Um, folks, he is not a scientist using genetic modification. The article says this is the result of crossing 8 different breeds of miniature cow over 44 years. They sure as hell weren't doing GM back in the 1960s. He's just using old fashioned selective breeding to try to get an animal with the traits he wants. He did not use panda genes to make his cow look like that. Sheesh, I know you've been hitting the mimosas and bloody mary's all morning, but this is redickyouless.
I'm with Hekki, this looks just like a Belted Galloway cow, which are all over Maine. And not part Panda.
http://www.google.com/images?hl=en&rlz=1G1TSNBCENUS378&q=oreo+cows&um=1&...
This guy looks like he gets off watching animals mate. Shoe polish and peroxide could do the job, and they're probably not any more dangerous.
___________________________
"TISSUE, PLEEEEAZE!"
@Mrs. PC:
Does it really matter? Becuz it seems to me that he's also, most likely, a tinymeat.
♥ Threadkilla!
I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.
~Thomas A. Edison
Own a Ford Hybrid? Be afraid:
http://www.nearescape.ca/
Chris appears to be a homosexual.
Are there nude photos of Chris?
Those panda commercials were creepy/funny.
At least little panda cow is going to be a pet and not dinner.
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
The real life horror of Monsanto: David vs Monsanto
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E42ndfjnP1g
That is how diseases like Swine Flu are born. Dumbass trying to play God, well, Mother Nature has a good come back and that would be a field of locusts and mutant grandchildren who look like flipper. She'll throw in an extra mega hurricane just to wipe his sorry ass off the face of the earth.
*************
"Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something."
— William Goldman
Submitted by ginger_t on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 8:52am.
"I'm all for scientific advances, alien contact, and jet packs, but NOT for genetic crap shoot gaming overseen by a hillbilly Dr. Moreau. Will his hobby farm of mutant animals be the faithful sidekicks in the zombie apocalypse?"
****************************************
"Hillbilly Doctor Moreau". ROFL!
I've got a nomination for Hot Slut of the Day. This old shopkeeper guy in France, dancing to the Drums in the doorway of his store:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20APv6TPnUY&feature=player_embedded#!
Submitted by Hekki on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 9:03am.
Agreed, it's fukced up. Those little guys are gonna have all sorts of health problems and short lifespans. How entertaining!
this story is slathered in so much whatthefuckery I don't know where to begin.
*********
BTW does anyone else feel as if Chris Hansen will pop around the corner and go "why don't you have a seat" every time you click on Drunken Stepfather? - messageinabottle
What a fucking freak. Nice job loser.
There are only 24 in the world and the price tag is only $30,000?
That's like the reverse law of supply.
Why would create a Panda cow ? I think a Panda dog or cat makes more sense. It is cute.
That guy's awesome. He's like, so proud of his tiny animal collection.
Make mine medium rare with American cheese and hold the mayo, please.
What? Too soon?
_______________________________
"Everytime I lower the bar of expectations, you limbo right under it".
No, I don't think he looking to cure any diseases. I was just trying to look on the bright side, but stated even that was a long shot. I am the brain behind "hillbilly Dr. Moreau," so thanks for my first kudo in the New Year. I think this bodes well.
*************
Submitted by zinnia on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 9:30am.
Welll is he even looking for curing a disease? If a disease strikes in his farm he will call the vet and have him put the animals to rest,(or he will make the process short and take them out to the backyard himself..) he sure as hell wont go into a laboratory.
The only thing this "Hillbilly Dr Moreau" (as someone nicely put it lol) is looking for is simply that $30 000 paycheck,trust.
----
Submitted by ginger_t on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 9:05am.
I've always heard that world needs your heart's desire. In this case, I am struggling to find the direct impact. Sure, he *may* stumble upon the cure for a currently incurable diseases, but it's a long shot.
****************
Submitted by literarylioness on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 8:58am.
Why is this necessary?
I WANT HIM. NOW.
-------------------------------------------------
We can make weapons out of these candy canes.
Go ahead, suck it til it's pointy.
cute pet ):
all Chris sees are $..$ ; be a real farmer Chris yuh dork!
*\#_@/*
Does it shit Oreo cookies & pee Cookies & Cream ice cream? Just askin...!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Michael K, how could you insult the beauty of the PANDA COW by comparing it to that squalid waste of space and oxygen Taylor Momsen? You probably just gave it mad whore diease. Nice going. Happy New year everybody!!!
I don't like Chris Jessen. :( I wonder if he has a miniature dick to go with his miniature obsession.
★ª"˜¨¨¯¯¨¨˜ª¤.¸*•¸★☆☆★ª"˜¨¨¯¯¨¨˜ª¤.¸*•¸★☆☆r★
He's a cute animal. I hope PETA gets on that guy's ass, though. Animal sanctuary for Panda Cow now!
★ª"˜¨¨¯¯¨¨˜ª¤.¸*•¸★☆☆★ª"˜¨¨¯¯¨¨˜ª¤.¸*•¸★☆☆★
Submitted by ewe on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 9:34am.
Cut to five years from now when he's bored of animals and starts experimenting with/on people.
Ewe, that was my first thought too. Wait until he starts trying some Dr. Mengele or Human Centipede kind of shit. I still have trouble falling asleep thinking of that Human Centipede clip MK posted a ways back.
When did Colin Quinn start raising animals?
Cut to five years from now when he's bored of animals and starts experimenting with/on people.
Does it taste like Panda?
Welll is he even looking for curing a disease? If a disease strikes in his farm he will call the vet and have him put the animals to rest,(or he will make the process short and take them out to the backyard himself..) he sure as hell wont go into a laboratory.
The only thing this "Hillbilly Dr Moreau" (as someone nicely put it lol) is looking for is simply that $30 000 paycheck,trust.
----
Submitted by ginger_t on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 9:05am.
I've always heard that world needs your heart's desire. In this case, I am struggling to find the direct impact. Sure, he *may* stumble upon the cure for a currently incurable diseases, but it's a long shot.
****************
Submitted by literarylioness on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 8:58am.
Why is this necessary?
This is progress?
Is that Britney's dad?
I've always heard that world needs your heart's desire. In this case, I am struggling to find the direct impact. Sure, he *may* stumble upon the cure for a currently incurable diseases, but it's a long shot.
****************
Submitted by literarylioness on Sun, 01/02/2011 - 8:58am.
Why is this necessary?
Thing looks just like a Belted Galloway.
I'd love to see some good scientific progress, but this shit is unsettling to me.
Why is this necessary?
He has a "hobby" farm? I'm all for scientific advances, alien contact, and jet packs, but NOT for genetic crap shoot gaming overseen by a hillbilly Dr. Moreau. Will his hobby farm of mutant animals be the faithful sidekicks in the zombie apocalypse?