Ke$ha On Your Peen

Bristol Palin better find a new cause, because the abstinence movement has found itself a new poster girl. Or should I say, condom ho. Usually condoms and abstinence don't play together, but Ke$ha's face on a dick bag wrapper will make sperm fish drown themselves in semen and cause labia to slam shut like Kirstie Alley's mouth when vegetables are around. Ke$ha wants to make sure that the only STDs out there are the ones that come out of her mouth in the form of "musical notes." Ke$ha cares!

TMZ reports that Ke$ha and LifeStyles have joined together to make 10,000 condoms with her face on the wrappers. Ke$ha will shoot them out into the audience at her shows starting this Monday.

In all seriousness, this is good for all of us. Ke$ha's kum katching kondoms (let's call them Kum$has) will keep her fans from spawning. And those poor souls who were dragged to her show by a ho who doesn't know better can use Ke$ha's condoms to cover their ears with. A win all around! Kudo$ to Ke$ha!

Posted by: Michael K

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Ke$ha • Trash

Submitted by WildGuy on Mon, 03/07/2011 - 3:21pm.

I'm thinking, there aren't enough letters in 'NO' to fully express the No-ness of my response to this article.

Submitted by Mrs Patrick Campbell on Mon, 03/07/2011 - 2:32am.

Rubbers are FORBIDDEN in our house and if any man ever pointed his fish-rubber-covered sizenmeat at us we would strangle it!

Submitted by Fraggle on Sun, 03/06/2011 - 12:36pm.

Submitted by Centaurious on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 10:43pm.

Well, it's a game-changer in terms of birth control.

Here we go:

1. Keisha condoms
2. Uggs
3. Birkenstocks
Addendum:
4. Croc shoes
5. Any 'celebrity 'fragrance'
6. Charlie Sheen

Submitted by salacious on Sun, 03/06/2011 - 12:36pm.

Oh the irony... clearly she didn't have a condom when that guy came on her belly and took a picture of her. Maybe she should think of keeping those condoms to herself.

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"Sal, darling, you are the reason some women go gay. ♥" - Submitted by Dog on Fri, 07/09/2010 - 6:32pm.
"life is precious, you must not have watched The Lion King, you heartless fuck"

Submitted by Khensu Hetep on Sun, 03/06/2011 - 12:25am.

I can't stand this one's music, but I feel kind of sorry for the comments on her appearance.

The ass fairy didn't come to me either, and we need love too! Her face isn't that ugly. Showering would do wonders for her appearance. I've definitely watched uglier girls getting whistled at walking down the street, by average guys.

As long as I don't have to hear her, I don't hate her that much.

†
"I'm the guardian of this land,
I'm Dracula, Prince of Walacchia.
My name is synonymous with fear and terror
which I sowed and grew and which I fed on."
-Opera IX (Under the Sign of the Red Dragon)

Submitted by MickeyHolland on Sun, 03/06/2011 - 12:15am.

Up to recently I had no idea who she was, but then I saw “Your Love is My Drug” on MTV. It made me so happy, because now I know that there is actually someone on earth who's singing voice is even crappier than mine.

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Who are you calling silly cow?

Submitted by Centaurious on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 9:13pm.

Well, it's a game-changer in terms of birth control.

Here we go:

1. Keisha condoms
2. Uggs
3. Birkenstocks

_________________________________
"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Marjorie Ingall

Submitted by caprica six on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 8:47pm.

Bitch is on the cover of a condom wrapper.

BAHWHWAHHAHAHAHAHLMAOOOOOOOOOOOROTFLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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"Skeptical scrutiny is the means, in both science and religion, by which deep insights can be winnowed from deep nonsense. Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known." - Carl Sagan

Submitted by govt_cheese on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 8:11pm.

I'm sure one of you hoes has said this already but I'll say it again - her face should be considered a contraceptive

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As useless as a saggy pair of tits

Submitted by Fraggle on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 6:30pm.

Is Ke$ha intentionally trying to look like she has a face full of jizz? If so? Well played, sir, well played.

Submitted by justincase on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 6:26pm.

Who is she? Do I need to know? Don't tell me!

Submitted by Few Words on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 5:22pm.

my dick retreated when it saw Ke$hit Kondom

fire me 1st before i play shit moosic on my shift

☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.

Submitted by Few Words on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 5:23pm.

☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
♦ When all else fails, they call me.
♦ Life sucks. Shit Happens. I'm a student of t-shirts.

Submitted by stake_spike on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 5:13pm.

Fuck that face is a hard on killer.

Submitted by jerseygirl17 on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 5:06pm.

The good thing is it's economical. You'll only need one. Pull it out, watch boner deflate like a pricked balloon, put back in wallet.

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I refreshed the page and my PENIS WAS GONE! -- SugarFreeRedBull, MicroPenis Advocate

Submitted by sushi on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 4:57pm.

That bitch is seriously fug.

Submitted by little_rascal on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 4:33pm.

Tiger Wood also has his face on condoms:
http://tigercondoms.com/

Submitted by Stock Broker on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 4:27pm.

Submitted by mike on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 5:47pm.
Submitted by RichBitch on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:05pm.
They should put her yearbook picture on 'em!

AND, while we're at it, at every prom.

_______________________________________________
"His faggy coffee shop poetry reading glasses will go over well in prison. I expect to see them on cumonglasses.com". ~ Dlister Provolone

Submitted by mike on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 4:17pm.

Submitted by RichBitch on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:05pm.

They should put her yearbook picture on 'em!

LOL.

Submitted by Stock Broker on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 4:12pm.

I'd rather go to the bus station bathroom with a jar of Vaseline & a towel before I let one of those kondoms touch me.

_______________________________________________
"His faggy coffee shop poetry reading glasses will go over well in prison. I expect to see them on cumonglasses.com". ~ Dlister Provolone

Submitted by Vermithrax on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 4:06pm.

Ab$olute bonerkill.

Submitted by Who Datt on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 3:49pm.

I can see this acting as a spermicide while it's STILL IN THE BOX. It's like the bucket of cold water poured on top of the Wicked Witch.

Submitted by WhiskeyTango on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 3:41pm.

This is probably a sinister plot by the Christian Right to get kids to stop having evil bad sinful premarital sex. And it's probably going to work.

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"I'm like a tree, I feed the branches of the people." - Kanye West

Submitted by WhiskeyTango on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 3:31pm.

Revolting.

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"I'm like a tree, I feed the branches of the people." - Kanye West

Submitted by becky n sydney on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 3:16pm.

Surprised her pic isn't on the label of genital warts ointment. She has 'genital warts ointment' officianado written all over her.
.
______________________________
"I still wouldn't..." - Satan

Submitted by dementa on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 3:15pm.

So every condom with Kesha's face on it is already infected with a bunch of diseases?

*********

I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.

Submitted by coca on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:46pm.

A promotional table at the next AVA Vegas convention is the next step in her illustrious career

Submitted by DeeDee on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:45pm.

@mahaatma

From what I've read, her mother is just as bad ad she is.

Submitted by mbar on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:43pm.

I'm pretty sure that any tard knows how to use a condom. She always just tags along with LG. Hey, what is she up to? Oh, I'll copy that but put more glitter and grease on it.

Submitted by mahaatma on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:41pm.

Her mother must be so proud.

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*snorts another line of Charlie Sheen*

Submitted by Message In A Bottle on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:27pm.

LMAO at all of your bonerkiller comments...I was thinking that too when reading this :P

However, on a serious note, I'm glad that there's someone out there that is speaking out about protection...too many kids always get the "abstinence only" lecture and know jack shit about STDs and protection. Fucking sad really.

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If you shoved a vuvuzela into a dog's ass and asked him to fart into a fan, the sound he produces would be more pleasant to the ears than this shit! - Michael K

Submitted by I heart Natalie on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:19pm.

Didn't she release a picture of herself with cum all over her body? Seems like it would be more appropriate to put her picture on packages of wet naps.

Submitted by Emeriesan on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:17pm.

This really puts me off and I'm a girl.

Submitted by Lucifer_Sam on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:12pm.

That disgusting meth face is enough to kill boners everywhere.

Submitted by joe shmoe on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:04pm.

Does she open beer bottles with her teeth? Klassy.

************
Pas une seule fois, le nom de John Galliano ne sera prononcé par le DG de Dior qui préfère saluer les valeurs fondamentales de la marque et le travail d’équipe En anglais: throwing JG under the bus. Starting now.

Submitted by SpiceDong on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:01pm.

fuck!
seeing that face in the condom wrapper would kill my sex drive in 2 seconds flat.

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"Lady Gaga is Madonna with diarrhea!" - Charo

·...¸><((((º>·´¯`·. ¸.><((((º> .·´¯`·..·><((((º>

Submitted by SpiceDong on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:01pm.

fuck!
seeing that face in the condom wrapper would kill my sex drive in 2 seconds flat.

-------------------------------------------------
"Lady Gaga is Madonna with diarrhea!" - Charo

·...¸><((((º>·´¯`·. ¸.><((((º> .·´¯`·..·><((((º>

Submitted by guest on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 1:53pm.

LOL @mk & everyone! :D

"not so fast tom ryan..."

Submitted by LaChaylo on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 1:52pm.

WINNING# scare tactic!!

Fools, cover it up, because when you wake up, you'll realize the ho you did it with will look like Ke$hit!!!

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"Dreams are only a cheap marketing ploy for Disney products, which are stomped out by reality upon reaching adulthood." Jazzfish_77, 03/01/2011 - 8:29pm.

Submitted by Sweetas on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 1:48pm.

Ahahaha MK! It's DAMN, BITCH IS UGLAY DAY on dlisted!

Submitted by misslainey on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 1:41pm.

Between MK's post and y'all, I'm dyin' over here.Ke$ha, the new face of abstinence.

Submitted by ben_dover on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 1:41pm.

shit with a face like KE$H!T ON A WRAPPER
ID PROLY SKIP THE WRAPPER AND GO BARE....

*tell em get in line and kiss your ass MUAH!*

Submitted by QueenieBK on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 1:33pm.

Submitted by TheBreakdown on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 2:38pm.

LIFESTYLES: Or your child can end up looking like this!

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Diet Coke spit through nose = no bueno.
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"... and her temper worse than wildfire it is gunpowder and blows up everything ..." Mary Shelley

Submitted by DDT on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 1:30pm.

Do today's young guys actually find Ke$ha hot & f*ckable & sexy? I don't know; I'm out of touch. But if I were a dude, I'd want to put a bag ON *HER* HEAD, not mine. A brown one.

Submitted by singlewhite on Sat, 03/05/2011 - 1:28pm.

exactly what island girl said...biggest boner killer ever...kesha is disgusting