Happy Daylight Savings Time!
The bad news is that you've lost an hour you could've spent working on your invention for the world's first time-release booze capsule. But the good news is that there's more sunshine time in the afternoon, which means the people of Miami get to stare at this melting Popsicle of wax even longer!
It's The Real Housewives of NYC's own Kelly Bensimon (To every bitch who bet this was Bill Hader as Steven Tyler: hand over your coins) sunning her gently worn leather carcass in Miami! Even though Kelly's torso sort of looks like Voldemort with a clay mask on, her body is still making me scream, OH BOY!, OBERTO! So I can not and will not hate.
And in case you need something to wash your retinas with, I've also left you some pictures of the meaning of elegance, Shauna Sand, with her 90s Eurogay hustler boyfriend in Beverly Hills last night.
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Shauna Sand must tip her boys very well ... Kelly needs to stop... everything! Steroids, working out, not eating, whatever she's doing she needs to not do.
Submitted by Slutleena on Mon, 03/14/2011 - 6:03am.
Yeah, they always look so outdated but what's truly amusing is that Shauna Sand's boyfriends/husbands were in preschool the time that look went out of style. Then again, it's always 2002 to Shauna Sand. I go to school with a lot of fake yuppie skanks, and they don't even dress like this anymore. Fashion evolves, even for attention whores.
†
"I'm the guardian of this land,
I'm Dracula, Prince of Walacchia.
My name is synonymous with fear and terror
which I sowed and grew and which I fed on."
-Opera IX (Under the Sign of the Red Dragon)
Can anyone solve this Rubik's Cube?
Anyone?!
PLEASE!!!!!
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"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Marjorie Ingall
What the world needs in these difficult times is a new Shauna Sand sex tape / p0rn0.
Besides, I wanna see that dude banging her old gray clam.
Submitted by moriah on Mon, 03/14/2011 - 10:12am.
Aww, come on guys..don't be mean to Iggy Pop! He looks great.
+++++++++++
Great post, I was thinking all that picture needs is a caption on the bottom of; BRAINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Aww, come on guys..don't be mean to Iggy Pop! He looks great.
Her face is or was gorgeous and very photogenic. I'm thinking she really must be crazy to think this swim suit looks good on her. Try a one piece with some ruffles Kelly. Something soft with more material.
I have a sudden urge to go buy some Silly Putty?
~*~Hello, my baby! Hello, my honey! Hello, my ragtime gal....~*~
I have never seen a more straight up & down body since I saw David Bowie naked 25 years ago. Geeeez! The bad news is Kelly is a girl...supposedly. But I have my serious doubts.
Shauna...for the love of all that is holy...PLEASE...lift your droopy sagging knockers....they are supposed to look a little round ...not like two 5 lb flour sacks attached to your chest...
That's a MAN, baby!
Sucky 12/14/09 Motherfucker, I lick pits for a living
LawDog 03/15/2010 Leenie, LOL. I think we can all agree that I am the most important person ever Salacious 7/15/10 Thank you Leenie! You made me smile like a 19th century whore who got overpaid
Looks like Iggy Pop in a wig.
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"don't even try shitting on my rainbow!!" ~ Fucking_Classy
Why do all of Shauna Sands boyfriends get the Lorenzo Llamas cut circa 1997?
Sincerely,
Alana Smithee
is this trick related to Elizabetta Canalis?
Keep in mind, this question is coming from someone who hates her ass and therefore doesn't judge as a rule, but I make an exception here because they all have the same kind of ass!
†
"I'm the guardian of this land,
I'm Dracula, Prince of Walacchia.
My name is synonymous with fear and terror
which I sowed and grew and which I fed on."
-Opera IX (Under the Sign of the Red Dragon)
How is it that all of the sluts have the same squat, round-but-flabby gumball ass?
Are they made from the same manufacturer or what? Is it from taking it up there so much?
†
"I'm the guardian of this land,
I'm Dracula, Prince of Walacchia.
My name is synonymous with fear and terror
which I sowed and grew and which I fed on."
-Opera IX (Under the Sign of the Red Dragon)
Um. I kinda like her Charlie Brown bikini...
Oh Kelly. It's called a squat. Live it, learn it. For God's sake tone it.
-"Well, should we get more coffee or get two guns and shoot ourselves?"
* C R I N G E *
_________________________
You think Honey Badger cares? Honey Badger don't give a shit.
No Michael K, do not bring Bill Hader into this! What has he done to deserve that.
P.S, I love Bill Hader and Michael K, so that is all I got.
;D
Naughtychimp-
More and more, I'm beginning to wonder who wasn't, in the '40s and '30s, a Nazi?
"The very picture of class. Madame Coco would surely approve!" Yeah, but don't forget that Coco Chanel was the mistress of a Nazi general, so maybe she's the fitting symbol for whores who do sick things for money.
As for Kelly - yikes! You did know that her ex-husband, gilles, was married to Elle MacPherson before her, right? Ugh.
Kelly Bensimon was born with a dick, right? That's the only way I can make sense of what I am seeing in that bikini pic.
Kelly has always reminded me of Sienna Miller, looks wise, if Sienna spent too much time in a tanning booth and aged a billion years. I find Sienna gorgeous, which leads me to believe Kelly could be too. If only she would cover up her boy body, and stop tanning. There's potential there.
Shauna's "boyfriend" looks like a homo. I'm guessing this is *giggle* for the fame? AHAHAHA. Is she some kind of big thing in France? Is that why all these guys move over here and get with her, or are they looking for a green card? Because I do not get it. She's not famous, she's not hot and I doubt Lorenzo pays her that much in child support (why else does she wear those stripper shoes instead of the nouveau riche, fame whore Louboutins?). Not to mention we all know her tits and vag are jacked. Surely these guys can find a wealthier sugar mama to leech off.
Satchels of gold.
Glad you're safe hotmammi!
*chanting as always*
Glad to see Hotmami here. (:
Sea Loofa
*hugs to Fraggle and ISMU*
This Kelly bitch would be, dare I say, kinda hot if she gained weight. She has a nice face. someone needs to explain her choice of swimwear. I mean, really.
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Throw your soul through every open door
Count your blessings to find what you look for
Turn my sorrow in to treasured gold
You'll pay me back in kind and reap just what you've sown
-Adele
Kelly is a true example of a woman who has spent years over exercising, improper nutrition, and drug/alcohol abuse. I'd much rather look at a slightly larger woman with curves than this skeleton with brittle hair and leather skin.
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"Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something."
— William Goldman
Submitted by Hotmami on Sun, 03/13/2011 - 8:07pm.
Submitted by Fraggle on Sun, 03/13/2011 - 7:59pm.
Hi, Fraggle!!!
Oh girrrrrrrrrrrrr. We been a prayin', worryin' and v00g00in' for your ass.
Sooooo glad to hear from you you! (((hug)))
Hotmami, glad to see you here and grateful for your safety.
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The physical appearance of the please makes no difference.
Submitted by becky n sydney on Sun, 03/13/2011 - 8:06pm.
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Exactly, she was there for teaching English to school children.
I will keep my hopes up. I really must think she's ok.
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
Re: Kelly Bensimmon
Her delusion is almost heartbreaking.
Hotmami, glad your ok!
Jana, I hope your friend is safe. Think positive, maybe he/she just doesn't have a way to communicate?
I have a friend who just went back a little over a year ago and 23 other friends who visit their families a couple times a year. I don't remember where their families live or if they are there now. I hope they are all ok.
Submitted by Fraggle on Sun, 03/13/2011 - 7:59pm.
Hi, Fraggle!!!
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Throw your soul through every open door
Count your blessings to find what you look for
Turn my sorrow in to treasured gold
You'll pay me back in kind and reap just what you've sown
-Adele
@Jana
Don't panic yet - my sister has several friends (English language teachers) who were known to be in the Sendai region that we are yet to hear from.
Communications in Japan at the moment isn't much better than two tin cans and a piece of string so just hold in there.
Could be good news just around the corner!
.
______________________________
"I still wouldn't..." - Satan
Hotmami?
*rubs eyes*
Hotmami?
You're okay?
YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
Hotmami?
*rubs eyes*
Hotmami?
You're okay?
YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
Submitted by Hotmami on Sun, 03/13/2011 - 7:50pm.
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thank you, I'm worried sick. No one has heard from her in days. It's awful out there, you're lucky to have gotten out alive if you were amidst the disaster, God bless.
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
Submitted by Jana on Sun, 03/13/2011 - 7:45pm.
Hotmami, I'm glad that you and your daughter are safe, meanwhile my friend is still MIA and probably dead.
Jana, I am so sorry. My thoughts are with you and your friend's family.
***********************************************
Throw your soul through every open door
Count your blessings to find what you look for
Turn my sorrow in to treasured gold
You'll pay me back in kind and reap just what you've sown
-Adele
What a HORRIBLE body, eew eew eew.
B!i!i!iD~
For your health.
Hotmami, I'm glad that you and your daughter are safe, meanwhile my friend is still MIA and probably dead.
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www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
I want my damn hour back.
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"The world is a pretty nice place if you're happy"
John Garfield
No one lives forever
i agree, mk please stop the foolery you are involved in and post again. i keep throwing up in my mouth a little when i see this (i'm hungover and just ate a burrito)
Submitted by slowlygoindown on Sun, 03/13/2011 - 7:19pm.
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It's not usually this sappy in here, but we were all worried about Hotmami being in the earthquake/tsunami...
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"my brows could subtract that WTF look on your face so move along"
re: Mz Sands...has that boobage evolved from the same science that gave us the equally disturbing (& pointless) Japanese square watermelons???
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...The wind is rushing after us, and the clouds are flying after us, and the moon is plunging after us, and the whole wild night is in pursuit of us...
Submitted by slowlygoindown on Sun, 03/13/2011 - 7:19pm.
Oh wow. It's like a clique up in this piece. A-Rod wouldn't go for Kelly. He likes blonde hair, fake or real
Shit, just pop a blonde wig on Kelly here, and A-rod would be good to go. He seems to like beef-jerky bodies.
***********************************************
Throw your soul through every open door
Count your blessings to find what you look for
Turn my sorrow in to treasured gold
You'll pay me back in kind and reap just what you've sown
-Adele
Oh wow. It's like a clique up in this piece. A-Rod wouldn't go for Kelly. He likes blonde hair, fake or real
*big hugs to PSL and csg*
***********************************************
Throw your soul through every open door
Count your blessings to find what you look for
Turn my sorrow in to treasured gold
You'll pay me back in kind and reap just what you've sown
-Adele
Hot Mami, VERY good to see you.
*hugs*
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My pretty mouth will frame the phrases that will disprove your faith in Man.
-Fiona Apple
YAY Hotmami! Thank goodness you and your daughter are OK. Please know all of your friends here were biting their nails worrying about you.
(((HUGS and SMOOCHES)))
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Nothing is more incomprehensible than wasting valuable time. Waiting for someone who will crawl into your hospital bed with you at 94 years old is WORTH THE WHOLE FUCKING MILKY WAY GALAXY and then some. - Caprica Six 3/2/11