Wednesday, January 3rd 2007

Afternoon Crumbs

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Tyra Chunks - Egotastic!

Demi Moore's retro looking Vanity Fair cover - Popbytes

Scott Storch tries to buy his fug ass into Lohan's pants, it will probably work - ASL

Tobey Maguire's little baby - Celebrity Nation

Kristin Cavallari's new dude needs to rethink the do' - Popsugar

Tony Parker won't be having a bachelor party - Hollywood Rag

Heroes Spoilers - Just Jared

Beyonce won't be getting an Oscar anytime soon - IDLYITW

Teri Snatchers looking hot - Cityrag

Beyonce and Jay-Z's romantic holiday, barf - Mollygood

Lindsay Lohan talks on her cell phone in the pool - Hollywood Tuna

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Wednesday, January 3rd 2007

The Bionic Woman May Return to TV

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NBC has greenlit a one-hour pilot for a remake of The Bionic Woman. The 1976 classic TV show starred Lindsay Wagner as Jaime Sommers, a female cyborg spy. The network gave a cast-contingent order to the pilot. No word yet on when shooting will begin or who will star as the title role.

The original was a spin-off of The Six Million Dollar Man. It followed Jaime Sommers, a tennis champion, after she's almost killed in an accident. The U.S. Government saves her ass by giving her fake parts with special superhuman powers. She uses these powers to battle fembots and spies. Lindsay Wagner won an Emmy for her work.

Ugh, here we go again. Ruining a classic! There's a lot of talented hos out there that can come up with original and interesting ideas. Why do we need to bring the past back? That being said, I really think CoCo should play the title role. That's just my idea and I think it's brilliant.

Source

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Wednesday, January 3rd 2007

Parasite Hilton Gets a Load to the Face

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TMZ has this amazing picture of Parasite Hilton promoting her album at Pure in Las Vegas a couple of months ago. Apparently, someone in the audience felt the way most of the World feels and chose to show it. Homegirl got a load to the face she isn't used to. Someone threw an ice-cube at her ass! Stupid ho is still smiling. Her face is so desensitized from loads to the faces that she doesn't even know what it is! I'm surprised her tongue didn't suddenly go into action and try to suck it up like the damn piece of trash she is.

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Wednesday, January 3rd 2007

The Ugliest Portrait Ever

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Yeah I know there's a lot of Britney Spears posts today, but this will be the last one...this hour. Anyway, Brit Brit apparently want to show off her body in a new painting she's having commissioned. Brit thinks she looks "awesome hot" after giving birth to Jayden James and wants to show it off.

A source said, "Britney's been getting in better and better shape since she split with Kevin and wants her body immortalised in a portrait. She loves the film 'Titanic', especially the scene where Kate Winslet's character Rose gets painted in the nude. She wants it tastefully done, though, and is looking for the right artist to do it."

Do they have airbrushing for portraits? Let's hope it's done in Picasso style. At least that way she'll look sort of hot. Poor ho, she would look hot if she didn't show off her thighs and gut. Umm..Kate Winslet in Titanic? More like the ship itself!

Source

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Wednesday, January 3rd 2007

Blessed Angelina

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Artist Kate Kretz has created this painting she calls "Blessed Art Thou" which will be displayed at the Miami Art Fair this Friday and Saturday. She describes it on her blog:

This painting addresses the celebrity worship cycle. The title, “Blessed Art Thou”, is taken from a line in the Catholic prayer “Hail Mary”: “…blessed art thou among women”. Our culture is deifying celebrities, but in the bible, it is the meek who are blessed, so the title presents a question for the viewer to ponder.

I chose a setting where the cycle begins: psychologically oppressive environments like this one are one of the feeding sources for the consumer, hungry for “information” about the celebrity's private life. I am interested in the psychological ramifications of celebrity worship, particularly as they relate to class.

Angelina Jolie was chosen as the subject because of her unavoidable presence in the media, the world-wide anticipation of her child, her "unattainable" beauty and the good that she is doing in the world through her example, which adds another layer to the already complicated questions surrounding her status.

The "Virgin" and Zahara figures are loosely based on a Van Dyck Virgin painting, and the Maddox figure's pose is borrowed from a Raphael painting.

Ok most of that talk is a little too smart for me to comprehend. I'm just blushing at the site of Maddox peen. I mean that's not something I wanted to see like ever. Actually, is that even Maddox? Is that even Zahara? I think those are stand-ins.

Source VIA Mollygood

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Wednesday, January 3rd 2007

Parasite Hilton Quote of the Day!

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"Guys see me as this public sex symbol, and then moan when I'm not at all sexual at home. To be honest, I'd rather just sit and watch LOST or stuff my face. "Someone told me you start liking sex when you hit 30 - but we'll see."

Source

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Wednesday, January 3rd 2007

The "Who Cares?" News

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Mary-Kate Olsen bites a stripper - INO

KFed is looking for his next meal ticket - SOW

Pray for Teri Garr!! - Gabsmash

Demi Moore wants kids with Ashton - ICYDK

Vintage Melania Trump all nude - NSFW

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Wednesday, January 3rd 2007

Mimi Classes It Up for the Kids

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Mariah Carey decided to keep it demure and elegant for the opening of Oprah's School of Girl Geniuses in South Africa. She probably that since she was wearing pearls that she looked like a lady. We'll let her believe that.

Thanks momthemumsie

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Wednesday, January 3rd 2007

Kid Rock is Mad

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Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock both held New Year's Eve parties in Las Vegas only miles apart. When Kid heard that Pam's ex, Tommy Lee, was also in town and that he was hooking up with Pam again he blew up. Apparently, he tried to find where Tommy Lee was so he could kick his ass. Friends of Kid say that Tommy has been calling him and bragging about boinking Pam. Kid went over to the Hard Rock Hotel to find Tommy's big dick and suck....no he wanted to kick it.

A source said, "So he went over at 6 a.m. with two bodyguards, and began kicking down what he thought was Tommy's door. Only it wasn't - and Kid found himself staring at some poor, startled family. He signed an autograph for them as security arrived, then bolted over to the Paradise strip club." Tommy's rep said that he was in the hotel, but on a different floor.

First of all, who fights over Pamela Anderson? That's like fighting over rotten fish, literally. Second of all, what dumb ass family would let Kid Rock repay them with an autograph? Hell no, I would be like "show me the money!"

Source

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Wednesday, January 3rd 2007

I'm Not Calling Ashlee Simpson Fat, But....

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Ashlee Simpson let her lady lumps breathe in Hawaii over the past weekend and although she's not a lard ass, she looks a little....thick. Ok not thick...she looks a little....chunky. Ok not chunky...she looks a little...wobbly. Ok, she looks gross.

Source

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