The L.A. County Coroner is busy today. The Coroner already released Brittany Murphy's cause of death and now they put out a statement on the death of Casey Johnson. The Coroner said that the specific cause of death will be listed as "diabetic ketoacidosis." Casey suffered from a severe case of diabetes.

The same source who probably spilled the shit about Brittany's autopsy tells TMZ that Casey simply didn't take care of her illness. It sounds like Casey gave up. She didn't take her insulin shots, didn't exercise, was probably boozing and ate stuff she shouldn't have been eating. Before her death, Casey had to be hospitalized twice for falling into a diabetic coma.

Another source tells People that police believe Casey was partying the night before and didn't take her insulin shots. Also, riding on the fuckery express with "you know who" probably didn't help matters at all.

Nearly 6 weeks after her death, the L.A. County Coroner has released Brittany Murphy's cause of death. TMZ says that the Coroner issued a statement that said Brittany died of community acquired pneumonia, iron deficiency anemia, and multiple drug intoxication. The Coroner also said that it was an accident.

The full autopsy report will be released in a couple of weeks.

Since Nurse Jackie is not here to tell me what any of this means, I went off to the Wikipedia in search of answers. According to them, this is what community acquired pneumonia is: "a disease in which individuals who have not recently been hospitalized develop an infection of the lungs (pneumonia). CAP is a common illness and can affect people of all ages. CAP often causes problems like difficulty in breathing, fever, chest pains, and a cough. CAP occurs because the areas of the lung which absorb oxygen (alveoli) from the atmosphere become filled with fluid and cannot work effectively."

TMZ added that a source involved in Brittany's autopsy said that her death could have been prevented if she went to the hospital in time. Instead of receiving the proper treatment at a hospital, Brittany self-medicated with over-the-counter meds, cough syrup and medication for cramps. Brittany already had the sicks in a major way, but the meds took her over the edge. So basically, iron pills and a hospital stay would've saved her life. Sads.

And I guess Simon Monjack will have to start singing a new song since his wrongful death lawsuit against Warner Bros. isn't going to go anywhere.

Slap me with a wet chicken cutlet for not seeing these glorious pictures of Phoebe Price giving Bob Barker a late-in-life boner by posing with a variety of grocery store items at a supermarket in L.A. last month. Marvel at Chicken Cutlet's skills as she showcases a bag of pasta sides, dog food and a box of Kraft Mac & Cheese. This is beyond Price is Right or Supermarket Sweep shit. This is like a photo spread straight out of Vogue Chernobyl.

And if that isn't enough to leave you reaching for the defibrillator (just pretend for me), I also threw in some pictures of PP and Quween of the Scene walking in the parade of beauty on the ho stroll yesterday.

Business has been slow for the gold digging cocktail waitresses out there, but it might start to pick up now that Tiger Woods' cage door is about be opened. So put Gloria Allred on your speed dial and practice shooting an Ambien pill out of your twat!

A source tells Radar that Tiger's wife Elin Nordegren is in Hattiesburg, Mississippi to collect his ass from sex rehab where he's been for the past few weeks. Elin must have met with her financial advisers and decided that the best decision for her wallet is to stay with Tiger, because she has canceled plans for a divorce. Instead Elin and Tiger are going to go away for a while to work on their marriage.

Le source explained, “Tiger and Elin want to be alone out of public when he leaves the clinic. He should be out by the weekend. They are giving their marriage another try."

So not only will cocktail waitresses everywhere be popping the Andre this afternoon, but so will Orlando night clubs, the pharmaceutical companies, and the cell phone industry. However, fire hydrants won't be smiling this weekend.

And today's Tiger Woods headline that pays is brought to you by UsWeekly:

HO STOP! Balls on your face is ok, but your face on balls is not? If it wasn't for a pair of golf balls slapping your chin, you wouldn't be on UsWeekly or anywhere else. And don't even get me started about the balls attacking your chest. Don't dis balls!

Since the most action Reese Witherspoon ever got from Jakey Poo was a pedicure while watching a Sex and the City re-run on TBS, she has dove head first into the dating pool. And apparently, Reese doesn't care if the pool is chlorine-free and filled with dying gnats, because Star says she has quenched her thirst for penis by knocking it with the manwhore of Hollywood Gerard Butler. Gerry can officially change his life tagline to: THE BUTLER DID EVERYTHING!

A source tells Star that Reese and Gerry first met to discuss working together on some movie. It didn't take long for them to go from flipping script pages to flipping each other in Gerry's bed. The source went on to say that Reese isn't calling her lawyers to draw up a beard contract, because she only sees Gerry as a fuck-time partner and nothing more. “Reese doesn’t want to hurt Jake’s feelings and doesn’t want him to know about her and Gerard. She’s not interested in taking it a step further with Gerard — and that’s how she wants to keep it," says the source.

Well, whether Reese likes it or not, Gerry will always have a special place in her vagina, because he will be known as the first man who gave her crabs. When Gerry sticks the tip in, a bottle of RID falls on your head.

And Gerry isn't Reese's only piece of the moment. People claims that Reese and a talent agent who goes by the name Jim Toth got a little closer at dinner last Thursday. Some nosy bitch said, "They were having a lot of fun, totally getting along and laughing and talking the whole dinner. Reese seemed very happy. She was smiling all dinner. The mood was upbeat and really good." One of Jim's friends added that it was just a date and nothing serious.

I bet Reese is the one who leaned over at dinner and said to Jim, "I'm only looking for hard dick so don't get too attached." America's SweetTART. I never figured Reese for the type. And I don't know if I still do. But I'll choose to believe for entertainment purposes only.

And after being with Jakey for a million plus years, it's not a bad thing that Reese is adding a few more miles to her crotchdometer.

When the harsh realities of the world start to fade Anderson Cooper's giggle, he switches on an episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta to him pick up again. Nothing makes his tonsils palpitate like a visit from NeNe Leakes. Because of this, one might think that Jersey Shore's Snooki also has the same effect on Mah Boo. Survey says...NEGATIVE! Mah Boo is much too much of a refined gentlemen to go dumpster diving with those pieces of trash.

During last night's Mah Boo 369me, Andy said that everything he knows about Jersey Shore he learned from the pop culture master class known as The Soup and he plans to keep it at that! Mah Boo even snapped Snooki's thong strap by saying she's so down to earth that she's in the gutter. Mah Boo releasing his inner cunt is my porn.

And since we're on the subject of Mah Boo, Gawker posted a story from The National Enquirer yesterday about Andy and his piece possibly adopting a child from Haiti. I really don't have anything to add, but I will say that if this comes true my farewell to the internet party will be held in the banquet room at Bullwinkle's. I will have no choice but to devote the rest of my life to taking care of Haitian babies. Specifically, Haitian babies adopted by a certain silver unicorn who lives in a firehouse. Mah Boo is going to need a gaymanny.

How about a little breakfast wang to go with your morning coffee and bagelwich? If you're not in the mood, just push it to the side, but don't let it get cold. Actually, it might already be cold.

Anyurethra, if you've always wanted to see what Jennifer Love Hewitt's size 2 ass tickles in the dead of night, then pinch your nipples because it is your lucky day.

OMG Blog posted a bunch of stills from some movie about the porn industry called Finding Bliss. In this cinematic wonder, Jamie Kennedy whips his dick out in the middle of some party for peens. Yeah, they threw a penis party and the only penis that showed up was Jamie Kennedy's. Couldn't they have invited bitches we'd rather see without pants on. You know, like Carrot Top or John Edwards? Next time.

Jamie Kennedy's party favor is after the jump. It is not safe for work. Well, unless you work for Tommy Girl and then it's okay as long as you forward it to him afterwards. JUMP TO THE PEEN!!!

When marshmallows dream...... - Jeepster

Runners-up:

This Brangelina Break Up protest just got weird. - BRADIFUL BITCH

Six Degrees of Human Bacon. - Plecostomus

I'll take "what I wish members of congress were doing right now" for $1,000 Alex. - Famousbeer

via Funpic

Lucky Vanous, star of my favorite canceled TV show of 1997 Pacific Palisades. But Lucky is best known for making a bunch of office ladies (who all look like they are going to an audition for the part of Janine in Ghostbusters) brew the panty pudding in a Diet Coke commercial from 1994.

Lucky's furry nipples can definitely make genitals melt, but who the hell drinks Diet Coke (without whiskey) at 11:30 in the morning?! Cut to you drinking a Diet Coke at 11:30 in the morning.

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