Tori Spelling
Monday, November 19th 2007
Candy Spelling: "LEAVE BRITNEY ALOOONE!!!"
Tori Spelling's mother, Candy Spelling, must be really bored with life. Candy wrote a column for The Huffington Post on Sunday where she talked about an article in the Los Angeles Times about Britney Spears running over the feet of paps and a cop.
Candy wrote, " Enough. It's time to leave this girl alone. She didn't run over the feet of the two paparazzi or one sheriff's deputy on purpose. I've seen "breaking news" of her driving on many networks, and I don't think her aim is that good."
She went on to say, "Personally, I don't think Britney is that fascinating, and she and her sons don't look that different in photos taken five seconds or five days apart. Three feet is enough. We all know that something terrible is destined to happen to Spears, her kids, one of the photographers or innocent bystanders if she isn't given a few feet of space and privacy. How about a time out?"
She's probably sad, because the paps are following Britney instead of her own daughter. Candy please go wrap something in your gift wrapping room and shut up.
Candy sort of looks like a cute, little pug. Wait! Doesn't Tori have a pug named Mimi La Rue? Have Candy and Mimi ever been in the same room together?
You can read the entire column at The Huffington Post
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Tuesday, October 23rd 2007
Tori's Dreams Could Be Going Up In Flames!
Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott's Fallbrook, CA bed and breakfast, Chateau La Rue, has been evacuated due to threats from the CA wildfires.
Tori went to the taping of "Dancing with the Stars" last night to support Jennie Garth and she told People Magazine , "We got a call that our Temecula [wine country] B&B was being evacuated. We had a lot on our minds tonight. We have friends who are watching [the situation]."
Chateau La Rue is the setting for Tori and Dean's reality show which ends tonight on the Oxygen network.
Save Chateau La Rue! Tori get your fug face over there STAT! One look at that mug and the fires will skedaddle their hot asses out of that joint. Save Chateau La Rue!!!
Image: Wenn
Sunday, October 14th 2007
Missed Opportunity!
Why the hell didn't anyone push over Paris Hilton's shoe on Tori Spelling's turtle face when they had the chance?!
Here's Tori bringing the fug to that Marshall's even yesterday.
Friday, September 21st 2007
PussyDOG Doll
Sickness! Not only is Tori Spelling in talks dog up Broadway by playing Roxie in "Chicago" but now she's going to be a Pussycat Doll?! 24sizzler.com reports that Tori will strap herself into a bustier and fishnets to perform in the burlesque show on September 28th at the Pussycat Lounge in Las Vegas.
I'd rather see Marmaduke in crotchless panties and nipple tassles!
Actually, it's the same thing. No offense to Marmaduke.
Friday, September 14th 2007
Broadway Has Gone To The Dogs!
Tori Spelling that super-creepy husband of hers, Dean McDermott, are currently in talks to star together in "Chicago" on Broadway. Tori's rep confirmed to Page Six that the couple are in negotations with producers. Chicago seems to be trying to cash in on this "husband and wife" thing. Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin also starred together in the show just last month.
Together these two have about as much talent as an overcooked turnip! Seriously, Broadway will put anybody up there just to sell tickets. The ironic thing is that Broadway theaters do not allow dogs in and those are the only creatures that will get anything out of seeing Tori in spandex!
Dean singing "Razzle Dazzle" should be a crime.
Tuesday, September 11th 2007
There's Something About Tori
It looks like Tori Spelling has dropped all the baby weight, but it also looks like she's had a little help from Mr. Scalpel. Homegirl is probably going to say that she did it with "pilates and eating healthy" but pilates will not make your face look like a stretched out whoopie cushion. This just goes to show you that all the plastic surgery in the world can't help a true fug.
I love the hard breasts though. She needs to join a bowling league with Posh. Their rock hard ta-tas could seriously cause some damage.
Here's Tori and her creepy husband at the Jill Stuart show yesterday.
Sunday, August 5th 2007
Tori Spelling's Selling Her Dirty Ass Flip-Flops?!
Dlisted reader Danielle sent me this eBay listing featuring Tori Spelling's used flip-flops. Apparently, Tori is selling a few items that didn't sell at her garage sale along with new items like these beautiful sandals.
The listing reads:
Featured here are Tori Spelling's Hawaiian blue and Cream thong sandals with orchids painted on the top. These sandals are made out of wood and the thong is made out of suede. Size 37, which is equivalent to a 5 ½ or 6. Measurements (approximately): Length: 9 ½ inches. Width: 2 ½ inches. Condition: No tears or stains, but this item has been used and there are visible scratches as well as chipping. These sandals are hand painted with the artist signature on the side; they are great for this summer season. Don't miss out on adding these sandals to your shoe collection!
The bid is at $20.51!!! That is $20.50 too much! Tori was also apparently selling off the wedding dress she wore when she married Charlie Shanian but I don't see that in there anymore.
I can see selling off the wedding dress, but flip-flops?! Nasty
Click here to bid on other beautiful items Tori has to offer like used dog dresses.
UPDATE - Bidding already ended on Tori's wedding dress . It didn't get picked up, because the reserve wasn't meant. It can still be yours! I know you want it! (Thanks Robyn)
Monday, July 16th 2007
Tori And Child
Tori Spelling brought baby Liam (and reality show cameras) for a day at the beach. Liam is like what....4-months old? He's huge! He looks happy. Whatever. Let's hope he takes after daddy in the face department.
Sunday, July 15th 2007
This Is Beyond Homo
Dean McDermott's outfit is so homo that it's hetero. That doesn't make sense, but you get it or pretend to at least. What I'm basically saying is no self-respecting 'mo would rock a skirt, socks and combat boots. Tori put him up to this I know. She wanted to take the attention off her fugly face and on him.
I feel sorry for the pooch. He'll never hear the end of it from his other dog friends. He has two be seen with these two douches.
Here's these two at the Much Love Animal Rescue Benefit yesterday at the Playboy Mansion.
Tuesday, July 10th 2007
Everything's UnGodly
Tori Spelling is now a minister. Actually, anybody can become one. Even me. Scary I know. Tori became ordained so she could officiate a gay wedding at her crappy B&B.
Tori said, "I was so honored when the couple asked me to officiate. We did it on the front steps of the Chateau as 40 of their friends looked on seated in a lounge-like atmosphere. It was so beautiful as I united Tony and Dex as life partners in love."
"I've done live theater and presented at the Emmys and this by far was my scariest moment simply because they had bestowed such an honor upon me and I didn't want to let them down."
Tori is such a romantic. I hope she covered up her tits while performing such a beautiful ceremony. I would hate to be uniting as one while looking into the depths of hell.
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