Salma Hayek

Salma Hayek protected her young while leaving her NYC hotel yesterday. Paps were trying to get pictures of her baby, but Salma wasn't having it. She went after one photographer. Get them girl! She should have whipped off her top and jiggled those giant breasts around. She would have knocked them all out with just a couple of twirls. They would have been begging for mammary mercy.

Splash, Wenn

The gorgeous creature known as Salma Hayek made a rare appearance at Madonna's circle jerk last night. Although her giant pregnant chi-chis have deflated a bit, she is still perfect. I don't know why I get wet over her. She's so normal, but there's mystery there. I just want to hear her whisper, "Escandalo" over and over and over and over again.

That necklace is like a sparkling river cascading between two bodacious mountains. Her sugar daddy isn't bad either, but that's only because he's richer than Hannah Montana.

Wenn,Splashnewsonline.com

Salma Hayek is looking hotter than ever. She left her baby and oldie olsen boyfriend at home to attend the opening of the Sergio Rossi store in Beverly Hills last night. What Salma needs to do is stay away from Rachel "Chupacabra" Zoe. Chupa looks like she needs the blood of a virgin STAT. I'm waiting for her to break out into hysterics and beg for the One Ring to finally free her. Chupa! Stop wasting Salma's time and go and get your ring back from Bilbo Baggins.

I adore Salma. Hopefully this is her only meeting with Chupa.

Ever since Salma Hayek announced she was knocked up all I want to see is how big her titties will get. I'm sure they are going to pop and I wish to witness this. It will be like a delicious milky fountain. Sick! Breast milk tastes like jizz!

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