SCANDAL

The National Enquirer is reporting that Anna Nicole Smith was on so many different kinds of prescription drugs that she really thought Howard K. Stern was trying to do her in. Well, in my opinion she was probably right. Sources close to ANS claim that she was a complete mess in months leading up to her death. They claim she tried to kill herself twice, used coke all the time and had many degrading moments from shitting in the bed and puking everywhere and anywhere. She hardly ate and sources claim she asked her staff not to feed Dannielynn Hope, so she can grow up to be "slim and sexy." The source claims Howard never did drugs, but Anna did a lot. "Howard never used drugs but Anna smoked cocaine every single day. She'd smoke the cocaine and 10 or 15 minutes later she would be a changed person, very animated and talking loudly. Sometimes she would smoke too much - and took pills to bring her down." Smoked crack? Made her baby an ano? Thought Howard was trying to murder her ass? Yup, all that sounds right.

Zsa Zsa Gabor's husband Prince Frederic von Anhalt will file a paternity challenge this week, because he belives his old-man sperm created Dannielynn Hope. He wants custody of her and says he will travel to the Bahamas pick up his new fortune Danni and bring her back home if the court rules in his favor. Prince Douchebag claims he had a 10-year affair with Anna and that she wanted to be a Princess.

Zsa Zsa's former publicist has called Freddy a fraud and says he bought his title making him a faux Prince.

Danni already has two men vying for the role of daddy in Larry Birkhead and Howard K. Stern. Ugh, what does Zsa Zsa have to say about all of this? I mean her and Danni can share diapers!

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Zsa Zsa Gabor's former publicist claims that Frederick von Anhalt is a chronic liar and isn't even a prince. Freddy is the third man to come forward claiming he is the true father of Dannilynn Hope. Ed Lozzi said Freddy is "a chronic fabricator who likes to inject himself into current events to see himself on television."

Prince Freddy claims that he met Anna Nicole Smith while she was still married to that old guy. He said that Anna really wanted to be a princess and Freddy was going to adopt her, but Zsa Zsa denied him.

Um...ok. He also reportedly bought his title from a financially strapped Marie Auguste, Princess of Anhalt.

Dlisted reader, Secede, made an interesting point. If this douchebag is correct in being DHope's father then she is Paris Hilton's aunt! Hasn't this baby been through enough?! You see Zsa Zsa was married to Conrad Hilton, Paris Hilton's great-grandfather. They had a child, Francesca Hilton, who is Paris' great-aunt. If Anhalt, who is now married to Zsa Zsa, had a child that would make that child Francesca's step-sister, yes? And since your aunt's sister is also your aunt - THAT WOULD MAKE MAKE DANNIELYNN PARIS' AUNT! LOL!
OMG! I really need to get ANS off the brain!

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The Broward County medical examiner just held a press conference. First of all, his accent was really thick so I had a hard time understanding his ass. Second of all, he said that her cause of death is unknown. He said further tests must be performed and it will take 3-5 weeks to determine. They have ruled out death caused by physical injuries such as being stabbed or shot. She had minor bruising to her back caused by a fall that occurred days ago in the bathroom. There was a small amount of blood in the stomach that was probably caused by terminal shock. They did not find any kind of pills in her stomach, however at this time they have not yet performed blood tests. He also reports that she was not dead that long before paramedics arrived. Her body was still warm, but she was dead on arrival when brought to the hospital.

He did say that they believe she did not die from ingesting a large amount of pills, because usually when someone dies of an overdose due to pills there is evidence in the stomach. He did not rule out an overdose though. He also confirmed a few old plastic surgery scars.

The police department is still performing an investigation, but they can report no crime has occurred. No illegal drugs were found in her room. There were prescription drugs found, but they won't reveal the names of those drugs. Star Magazine is reporting through sources that drugs included Valium, Vicodin, Provigil, Xanax and a high amount of Methadone. My favorites!

They would also not reveal why Anna had a nurse.

Zsa Zsa Gabor's current husband, Frédéric Prinz von Anhalt, thinks he could be the father of Dannielynn Hope. JESUS! You know executives at Lifetime and SoapNet are working overtime over this. He claims that he had a 10-year affair with Anna.

He said, "If you go back from September, she wasn't with one of those guys, she was with me."

He said that Anna begged him to marry her so she could become a Princess.

Freddy said that if Dani is turned over to Howard K. Stern of Larry Birkhead, he would file a lawsuit. My head is spinning. Someone send Dr. Phil in already!

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Here we go! This is my 123,456,896th post about ANS and it's not even 1pm! So...ET is reporting that ANS and Howard K. Stern were going to officially get married at the end of this month. ET anchor Mark Steines says he was invited to the wedding to be held on February 23rd in the Bahamas. TMZ is reporting that 5 other people were staying at Anna's suite at the Hard Rock. Howard K. Stern, Anna's nurse (who is also her bodyguard's wife), her bodyguard, and two unidentified people were with her.

CNN is reporting that Anna tried to kill herself in the Bahamas by drowning herself. Howard found her and her bodyguard successfully gave her cpr.

It was also reported that before calling 911, Anna's nurse called Howard and he took a long time to return her call.

FINALLY...Larry Birkhead's lawyer just held a press conference after a judge ruled Anna's body must be preserved until February 20th for possible DNA testing to discover the paternity of Dannielynn Hope. Larry's lawyer is afraid that Howard will do a "bait and switch" of Dani's DNA so it doesn't match Larry's.

Scandal! Drama! Scandal! How soon do you think this whole saga is going to end up on "Law & Order?"

And Dlisted is totally going to change its name to AnnaListed today.