Sacha Baron Cohen

If you ignore the heinous rubber foot mitts made from the crusty dildos of Lucifer's sex slaves in the darkest dungeon in Hell on Sacha Baron Cohen's hooves, then you can appreciate the entire look he's working for his new movie The Dictator. Sacha shot scenes for that shit on the UES in NYC yesterday afternoon and judging by these pictures, I'm guessing his character was given the wrong instructions for how to master the art of dining and ditching. Or maybe he's on that new Jillian Michaels diet where you can eat whatever you want as long as you do it while jogging. Something ZANY, obviously. I don't know. But one thing I do know that Sacha made the right choice by styling his character after the accident baby of It's Pat and Dawn Wiener Dog.

If you're a child of the 80s, like me, then your mom most likely looked just like this at one time or another. But instead of CROCS, she wore baby pink Kaepas (with two pink triangles, thankyouverymuch) and DAMN she loved it. This takes me back. I can practically see my mom wading waist-deep in the pool with a protective cone around her neck after getting a perm the day before. Nothing makes me miss the 80s more than thinking about my mom screaming, "DON'T SPLASH, YOU BRAT! I JUST GOT A PERM!"

The Borat as Freddie Mercury rumors are back! But this time Deadline Hollywood swears on their TOLDJA! trademark application that Sacha Baron Cohen will slip into an assless Spandex onesie (bitch already has a few in his closet) to play the crotch thruster of all crotch thrusters in a Queen biopic. Sacha's rep shot down this rumor a couple of few years ago, but Deadline says that it's real this time and production will star next year. The script is being written by Peter Morgan who wrote The Queen and Frost/Nixon.

The surviving members of Queen have licensed their songs for the movie. Deadline's sources aren't sure if Sacha is going to try to achieve the impossible by replicating Freddie Mercury's voice, or if he's simply going to move his mouth to the track.

My emotions aren't sure where to go on this one. I mean, this could be as good as dating someone who works at the Hostess factory (FREE SNO-BALLS...in more ways than one) or as disappointing as running out of lube and olive oil right before you're about to get some.

But I would be all about a Queen biopic if the one man who was born to play Freddie Mercury was cast as him. I'm talking about John Stossel, of course:

John Stossel in spandex? That sight would make Barbara Walters lose her lisp! It's obvious that John Stossel's moustache and Freddie Mercury's moustache are one. Soulstaches forever.

(side-by-side via Stereogum)

Isla Fisher and Sacha Baron Cohen have been together 8 years, engaged for 6 and are raising a 2-year-old baby friend together. Early last week, Isla and Sacha decided they have spent enough time liking each other, so why not fuck it all up by getting married! Oh, I'm joking. Their new marriage will last as long as a plate of Vegemite! That shit doesn't decompose, right?

Woman's Day reports that Isla and Sacha got married in a small Jewish wedding in Paris last Monday. Isla and Sacha didn't feel like making it a giant extravaganza worthy of Platinum Weddings, so they only invited their close friends and family. Shortly after Isla handcuffed herself to Sacha, she wrote an e-mail to all her friends that read: “We did it – we’re married! It was the absolute best day of my life and in so many beautiful moments I missed you all so much. I thought of you as everything was happening, but Sacha and I wanted no fuss – just us!”

Unfortunately, I doubt Sacha wore any of these outfits to his wedding. What a waste. The perfect ceremony, reception and honeymoon ensembles.

Oh well. Hopefully, the guests got a plastic swan with Sacha's turd in it as a wedding memento. Congrats!

Sacha Baron Cohen really wanted to get into character when he filmed Bruno, but it sounds to me like there wasn't an authentic gay on set to help him through this process. Sacha decided to bleach every single hair follicle on his body, so he could have the body of a hairless European twink power bottom. But who bleaches anymore? Well, besides my cholita cousin who thinks we all can't see her blonde moustache glistening in the sun. Don't tell her I told you that. I mean, every gay knows waxing the ass is the only way! Invisi-bleach is so 80s.

Anyway, either Sacha didn't want to waltz with wax or nobody told him. Sacha found out the hard way that bleach is not the answer. The Sun says that shortly after he got bleached, his no-no turned into an ouch-ouch. A source said, “He had a bad allergic reaction to hydrogen peroxide, which is a strong bleaching agent. It was so severe around a certain part of his anatomy that he couldn’t sit down for three days. He had to make an emergency appointment with the doctors, who gave him some medication to counter the irritation. Crew members found the whole incident hilarious and it slowed down filming for a bit, but Sacha soon got over the discomfort. He has suffered no long-lasting ill effects.”

Down for 3 days?! What kind of fake gay is he? If you're going to act the part, ACT the part. Dip that ass in some oestrogen cream, shake it off and get back out there! There have been times where my b-hole was on death's door, but I slapped it into action, inhaled and handled my business. There's no crying in butt sex!

Sacha Baron Cohen as Bruno is done terrorizing the runways of Paris and now he's creating chaos in California for his movie with the really long time. Yesterday at a Yes on Prop 8 rally, the infamous homosexual known as Bruno joined the protesters, waving his banner like a proud queen. When the jig was up and dumb whores started to realize who this blonde flamer really was, he was quickly taken away by his production team.

Wait. The flaming troll in the green is against ze gays marrying?! I mean, you can tell that leprechaun's manpussy puckers every time he sees a big dick. Even the dude in the black shirt knows that some homo activity is about to go down between Bruno and the homo-elf.

Don't these dumb bitches have something better to do on a Sunday afternoon? I don't know... like partake in a little gay sex?

And any of you that vote NO on Prop 8, will automatically get an invitation to one of my weddings. I'm sure I'll get hitched several times in my life, so there's a seat waiting for you at one of them. I promise to put a dildo, a bong and an In-N-Out gift certificate in all my gift bags.

During Agatha Ruiz de la Prada's fashion show in Milan, Sacha Baron Cohen as Bruno hijacked the catwalk wearing something out of Solange's basement wardrobe trunk. Bruno walked the runway like he was part of the show. It didn't take long for security to take him down while one ho shouted "Sacha!" Bruno was led away by a couple of officers with tiny moustaches.

Sacha is in Milan to film "Bruno: Delicious Journeys Through America for the Purpose of Making Heterosexual Male."

I love this bitch's tomfoolery. I just hope he plays one on Anna Wintour and leaves her bob in a fucking twist.

Below is the video. I love that the chick model doesn't even blink an eye. That is one professional 15-year-old.

VIA Huffington Post

Sacha Baron Cohen is currently filming a movie based on his gayer than gay character "Bruno" and he's definitely not holding back. Sacha tricked a former Mossad agent and a Palestinian smartie into an interview where he made them discuss the difference between Hamas and hummus.

The two dudes had no idea they were being duped. The Telegraph reports:

In the interview, which took place in Jerusalem, Bruno asked: "What's the connection between a political movement and food? Why hummus?"

One of the guests politely explained: "Hamas is a Palestinian Islamist political movement. Hummus is a food."

But Bruno went on: "Ya, but why hummus? Yesterday I threw away my pitta bread because it was dripping hummus. And it's too high in carbohydrates."

He told them: "Your confict is not so bad. Jennifer-Angelina is worse."

And he baffled the pair with a string of questions including: "Why don't you settle the conflict with a time share on the land?", "When will you Jews return the pyramids?" and "Why can't Jews and Hindus get along?"

One of the dudes wasn't that happy when he found out he was tricked by The Cohen. He felt Sacha was "exploiting their tragic conflict," but he knows the movie will probably be funnier "Showgirls." He said, "We'll try to be good sports about it."

Yeah, I'm sure the movie will be a fucking laugh orgy, but the multiple lawsuits that follow will be even funnier.

Thanks MisterStanfield

In the movie, the quintet is seen dining with comedian Sacha Baron Cohen in an Alabama home in October 2005. During the meal, Cohen, in his guise as the clueless Borat, refers to one man as a "retard," wonders whether his hosts own slaves, and, following a bathroom trip, returns to the dinner table with a plastic bag containing what appears to be feces.

 

According to a complaint filed Friday in U.S. District Court in Birmingham, Cohen and his codefendants sought to portray the Alabamans as "racially intolerant" and distributed a film "memorializing the mockery, humiliation, and degradation of unsuspecting participants." The plaintiffs charge that Cohen's film, which has grossed hundreds of million of dollars, caused them emotional distress, placed them in a false light, and resulted in an invasion of privacy. The lawsuit, which does not specify monetary damages, seeks an injunction barring further use of the embarrassing "dinner scene" from "Borat."