White Oprah

 

Yesterday Michael Lohan and Lindsay Lohan had their beloved reunion at her rehab facility in Utah. Of course, White Oprah had to issue a statement about it. Of course. She told the 24/Sizzler :

 

She’s doing well. I’m so proud of her. She’s grown up. I’m petrified of the paparazzi. I’m afraid it’s going to be a frenzy when she’s out. I pray that it all works out well.”

 

Is she for real! She's going to call those paps herself and show up in a white mink and limo, mugging for the cameras.

 

Michael however wouldn't really comment on the reunion. He only said, "I can't comment on my relationship with my daughter," he said. "But [the reunion] was amazing."

 

He's holding out for a real deal, I'm sure. 

 

 

 

 

 

Jodie Foster is the latest person to blame White Oprah for all of Lindsay Lohan's troubles.

 

Jodie who was a child star herself said, "Can I just ask, where is her mother? I mean, really, where is her mother?"

"When I was their age, there were no big 18-year-old stars... Now, we want the 17-year-olds so we can bleed them for all they're worth and squeeze as much money as we possibly can out of them - and then their career will be over in something like three years."

Yeah, basically. I can't wait for White Oprah's response. She's probably drowning her sorrows in Strawberry Hill and once she wakes up from her booze induced coma she will tell Jodie off I'm sure. 

In other Blohan news, Michael Lohan is currently in Utah visiting her reports Access Hollywood. She apparently has not seen her dad in more than 2 years. It'll be a quick trip I'm sure. He'll say "Hi Lina....Oh...Lindsay! Lindsay! Sorry, sorry. Hey kid, you look good and all that. Praise Jesus. Can you spot your old pop a couple of Benjamins." True that.

Source

 

 

 

Jim McMillan is White Oprah's current boyfriend and he's fired back at Michael Lohan for accusing him of boozing around the children and being an overall prick.

 

Jim spoke to Page Six and went on and on and on and on basically saying he's not a drunk....blah...blah...blah....Michael just want publicity....blah...blah...blah...he's a gentlement...blah...blah...blah...Michael needs to take care of his kids....blah...blah..blah and so on.

 

I was kind of with Jim until he said this:

"You do it in a very public way and force them to deal with the fallout. If you want to assassinate someone's character, leave Dina alone. She is way out of your league. She is a classy, intelligent, loving mom . . ."

Classy isn't the C-word I'd use to describe White Oprah.

 

 

 

 

Yesterday, White Oprah spoke to both 24/Sizzler and E! Online . She spoke about Blohan getting 1 day in the slammer. You would think she would say "thank you" to the judges and lawyers for basically letting that freckled skank get away.

 

Here's what she told E!

 

 

What the hell is going to happen in 1 full day?! 1 full day of sitting by herself in a jail cell. Just Lindsay and herself.....oh ok I know what she means now. Lindsay will probably get bored and either cut herself for attention or try and sniff the concrete.

 

Here's what she told 24/Sizzler

 

“My children and I are in a wonderful place in our lives and people just want to make things up and see us fail!”

 

Remind me never to go to this "wonderful place." Her daughter is an addict headed for jail, her ex-husband is a sleaze ball, her younger daughter is most likely going to be hitting the pipe in a couple of years and they are in a wonderful place?  

 

Somebody got effed in the ass with the delusional stick!

 

 

 

White Oprah is a free woman! She has reached a divorce and custody settlement from Michael Lohan. WO can now pursue her lifelong dreams!!!! What are they dreams anyway?

 

The terms of their divorce will not be made public, but will be final in 60 to 90 days. Michael will also be allowed to see his kids by September 6th through the process of therapeutic reunification. AHAHAH! Fucked up family.  

 

They have also signed confidentiality agreements to not discuss the details. That won't stop White Oprah. I'm sure she's gonna sit down with one of those entertainment shows and give us a blow by blow and next year release a sex tape where she really gives us the blow by blow. Oh, I love her!

 

Aren't you relieved?! Now you can finally sleep knowing that White Oprah is a free woman. 

 

Source: Access Hollywood

 

 

 

 

First of all, that is not White Oprah's boozy boyfriend that's the World famous radio man! I'm sure WO's boyfriend isn't that hot. Anyway, Michael Lohan wants White Oprah's live-in-boyfriend, Jim McMillan, out of the house and away from his children.

 

Michael's lawyer said, "During my client's telephone calls with the children, he has overheard Mr. McMillan in the background making inappropriate comments. On a more disturbing note, it appears that Mr. McMillan was inebriated."

 

Michael Lohan said, "Jim McMillan should not be in the presence of my children - especially when I'm being kept from them. He is no example, nor is he a substitute father."

 

DUH! Of course he's a drunk. I'd have to be a drunk and part-time heroin user to deal with the damn Lohan family! 

 

Source: Page Six

 

 

 

 

White Oprah has been sued by a man claiming she hasn't returned a $400,000 investment he gave her four years ago to help start Blohan's music career. Antonio Almedia claims some of the cash was used to record songs with Emilio Estefan, but Blohan bolted once she signed with Casablanca. She later released that shit hole album "A Little More Personal (Raw)."

 

White Oprah's lawyer said, "You mean the funds he claimed he lent her?"

 

OH!!! Those funds! Yeah, she probably blew that money right up her hippo-nostrils ages ago!

 

Source: Page Six

Image: Splash