Glamour

Jodie Marsh's exquisite and natural beauty leaves me speechless......

Here is this sophisticated and elegant creature at the opening of a whorehouse Orchard bar in London tonight.

29-year-old glamour model, Jodie Marsh, took off the layers of make-up and sperm from her face to pose all natural. DO NOT WANT! She kind of looks like Brenda Blethyn. This is just a big fat NO. Jodie owes her life to the Revlon corporation.

Jodie did do it for a good cause. Jodie did it as part of a Refuge charity campaign for victims of domestic violence. Thankfully though, this was just a one time deal. Jodie told Now Magazine (via DM) she isn't making a habit of this. She said, "I think there are people who need to put on more make-up and then they might pull more men. I love people who wear as much make-up as drag queens. Pamela Anderson always has well made up eyes. People say 'look how orange she is' - I can't tell you how to use a sunbed and I don't use fake tan."

She looks so....normal. Below are some pictures of the Jodie Marsh I've come to know and love. The sophisticated, elegant, classy and glamorous Jodie Marsh. That other girl without the make-up needs to go away for good.

Joan Collins confuses me. I picture her sitting on a sold gold toilet, shitting out rhinestones while reading the latest National Enquirer. But Joan recently told BlackBook Magazine that she hates tabloids and thinks they are for dumb people!

Joan said, "Our civilization has become extremely dumbed down, with shorter attention spans. All they want are sound bites. The tabloid magazines are the same every week. People has the same cover as InTouch as OK! as Us Weekly as Star magazine. They're exactly the same! It must be 100 to 120 people you read about all the time. They are appealing to a young audience, or a rather dumb audience."

Um...what is she saying? I'm still trying to take in all her glamour from the picture above. Whatever you say Joan! Just slap me and call me a bitch.

Joan went on to say that tabloids "go after those girls who exhibit more outrageous behavior. And, believe me, those girls love it. They call in items themselves - that they were at Nobu, some nightclub in SoHo. I can't think of anything more horrible than that. Publicity can be a drug."

Speaking of drugs, the scene below is my drug. It's one of my favorite Dynasty scenes of all-time! It's when Blake chokes the fuck out of Alexis. High-octane glamour!

Source: Page Six

Tom Ford arrived at LAX yesterday in an ensemble for first-class and private plane riding only. When you've got a nosy brat behind you kicking your seat and a fat heifer in front of you with their seat all the way in your lap, the last thing you want to be wearing is that shit. You want to be some nasty ass sweats and an XL sweatshirt.

Tom Ford looks like he's about to steal my heart and the Russian plans with a seductive tango. If there ever was a gay Bond, this is him.

Tom is probably one of those bitches that spends an hour grooming before sexy times. They have to perfectly trim their pubes, get the nipples perky and douche the anus. I had a one-nighter once that spent a good 45-minutes douching the hole. Through the bathroom door, all I could hear was running water and lots of gushing. It almost made me walk out, but I'm a slut, so I stayed.

Here's more snaps of Gay Bond at LAX.

La Pequeña has returned and this time the hot bitch is practically naked! She's back as Amy Winehouse and is only covered by duct tape and a guitar. Make sure to watch this video while in the privacy of your own home. You don't want to get all hot and horny in public. It's only a matter of time before she loses the duct and the guitar and we see her real la pequeña!

Excuse me while I go and cry in a hot shower.

Thanks Taylor

This ad is full of YES! I love how they toned down their real chola look, so they would look professional in the ad. I really hope they attend the job fair in all their chola glory. They shouldn't keep it hidden down. Be chola, be proud! Besides, employers like to see what you can do with a Sharpie. WORD.

And since we're on the subject of chola beauty......

Source: eBaum's World

Thanks MP

Shannen Doherty hooked up with her "Charmed" co-star, Holly Marie Combs, for dinner last night. They spent the whole night trashing Alyssa Milano and making fun of her hairy arms. Shannen is wasting her time by having dinner with Holly. The person she should be having dinner with is Rob Thomas! Shannen needs to seduce her way into the 90210 remake. Brenda deserves a second chance.

Oh shit. Remember when Steve and Laura spread the rumor that Brenda slept with the director to get the lead role in "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof?" Shannen needs to make that rumor come true on Rob Thomas in order to get into the new 90210. The future of Brenda Walsh depends on it!

Cleavage and a pearl necklace! What a dirty, dirty slut! The Daily Mail ran this little diddy about Lauren Bacall showing off a little bit of her 83-year-old tatas. They seem to think this is a fashion blunder. How? The bitch has boobs and she's not afraid to show them. This woman could go around naked with nothing but a labia ring and Crocs and I would still love her. Yes, even if she wore Crocs. That's true love.

Actually, I don't think I'd want to see her lady biscuit. When I was little, I once glanced at my abuelita getting dressed. It was like staring at the Grand Canyon. You know it's real, but it doesn't look real. You throw a coin in and you don't hear a sound. Oh shit! I can't believe I'm going there with my abuelita's vagina business. I need to punish myself with two hours of "Father Dowling Mysteries" and a cold clam soup dinner.

Here's that hot GILF Lauren at the Broadway premiere of "Gypsy" the other night. Since we're on the topic of hotness, I threw in a little Chris Burke. He was there supporting his former "Life Goes On" co-star, Patti Lupone. Obla-dee obla-da!

Danny Noriega spent his Easter Sunday night judging the "Suicide Drag Idol" contest at Oasis nightclub in Upland, CA. Damn, that didn't take long. One minute you're singing in front of millions of people and the next minute you're judging a dude's tuck technique.

Yes, that's a chola drag queen and not his stunning mother. Although, Danny's gorgeous chola mother totally does her make-up like that.

Source: TMZ

Holy Monica Lewinsky! La Pequeña Hillary Clinton for President!!!!! You have to watch her speech in the middle of the video, because I'm sold! Where do I vote? La Pequeña Hillary Clinton is the future of this country. Once again, our reigning Hot Slut of the Month, La Pequeña, has made life worth living.

I also approve of her choosing Hilary Duff's "Beat Of My Heart" as her campaign song. It makes so much sense.

Thanks Mahdee