Afternoon Crumbs

Monday, November 23rd 2009

Afternoon Crumbs

Would you motorboat? - Towleroad

And on the other side of the chichis coin.... - Lainey Gossip

Sofia Vergara's sausage strap had its work cut out for it - Hollywood Tuna

The Photoshop Awards: Clauda Schiffer, Helena Christensen and Eva Herzigova get nekkid - Egotastic!

Scrap The Photoshop Award above, because this right here deserves dozens of awards - I'm Not Obsessed

What in the Yummy Mummy hell? - Just Jared

In the words of Tommy Cooze: "Nicole girl, that dress is wearing YOU!" - Popsugar

Shakira looks hot (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

I REFUSE to believe this - Celebitchy

Kitson wants Lindsay Lohan's cookie - Hollywood Rag

This will singe your retinas - Holy Moly!

Oh, so THAT'S who Keenan Thompson reminds me of - Cityrag

News you can queef to: Eva Longwhoria only fucks on the weekend - ICYDK

The Howling is the latest classic to be sent to the butcher - SOW

Jermaine Jackson should let his clay head dry thoroughly before he leaves the house - Socialite Life

Posted by: Michael K


Friday, November 20th 2009

Afternoon Crumbs

Balloons trickling out of asses, rhinestones on crotches and giant gold angel wings... No, I'm not describing a Glamberace/Gayken/Tommy Girl threesome - Popoholic

And she's got her chichis out: The Miranda Kerr Edition - Egotastic!

Unfortunately, Miranda's boyfriend doesn't have his chichis out here - Popsugar

Askars is excited to get nekkid for True Blood. But not as excited as the millions of genitals who have been waiting for it - Just Jared

Why the hell does Squinty need sunglasses anyway? - Lainey Gossip

Dorota, come get this girl! (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

Fergie flaunts her tuck game - Hollywood Tuna

RiRi the Size Queen might want to ring up Wilmer Valderrama - Cityrag

LiLo's newest "direct to the discount bin" movie - Hollywood Rag

Glamberace's gay fight with Out Magazine continues - Towleroad

Kim Kardashian is full of shit - I'm Not Obsessed

Dawson's marriage is done - Popeater

A fluffy pussy who cums butterfly-shaped confetti turned the Christmas lights on at some mall in England. Take that, Mimi! - Holy Moly!

Tina Fey needs her own talk show that plays 24-hours a day, 7 days a week - Celebitchy

Brad Pitt to fill a Dark Void. No, this isn't a story about him reuniting with Aniston - Socialite Life

The Saved By The Bell reunion is off - ICYDK

Posted by: Michael K


Thursday, November 19th 2009

Afternoon Crumbs

I'm sure deep thinker Megan Fox is reciting Proust in her head while flashing her cooter - Hollywood Tuna

My So-Called Nipples - Egotastic!

Jenna Jameson's face might be on too tight, because she's not making sense - Celebitchy

David Walliams' piece of the week looks beat - Holy Moly!

Vintage Lady CaCa - Towleroad

Kate Bosworth photographed walking in front of Askars. This obviously confirms that they are doing anal together on an hourly basis - Lainey Gossip

Jennifer Aniston makes duckface - Just Jared

In "no need to announce the obvious" news, Pamela Anderson has done cocaine - Hollywood Rag

Will Ferrell is overpaid. Officially. - ICYDK

Bar Refaeli in some lingerie (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

Heineken knows how to make a viral video - Cityrag

Sasha Fierce goes crowd surfing - Popeater

Tommy Girl and Stepford Katie celebrate the third anniversary of their contract signing - Popsugar

Does this trick really look like Lucille Ball or did the two Cup 'O Noodles I ate for lunch eff with my head? - I'm Not Obsessed

Kristen Stewart could've destroyed the plates faster if she simply just performed a scene for them - Socialite Life

Posted by: Michael K


Wednesday, November 18th 2009

Afternoon Crumbs

Zac Efron is trying to lure the unicorns to his wannabe magical forest hair. It's not working. - Lainey Gossip

Giada de Laurentiis makes delicious food names sound like something a gynecologist does to your private parts - Gawker TV

Personally I'd rather see Chuck Bass in lacy lingerie - Egotastic!

Xtina begins shooting the unofficial remake of Showgirls - Hollywood Tuna

Ryan Phillipe sucks at hiding - Just Jared

It was Halloween all over again at Tim Burton's MoMa tribute - Popsugar

Cameras are the work of the devil. Case in point: Mop Head nipples (NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

I think Kate Major got confused. Jon promised her a "hand job," not the other kind of job - Celebitchy

Jennifer Hudson to play Winnie Mandela - I'm Not Obsessed

If Julia Roberts suddenly got an extreme case of elephantitis in the face - SOW

What Gay Al Reynolds sees after he closes his eyes at night - Towleroad

Leighton Meester's face is modeling Xtina's "natural" make-up look - Socialite Life

Janet Jackson should've rang up Candy Finnigan - Popeater

Avril Lavigne's vagina is not slowing down anytime soon - Hollywood Rag

Somebody stick a block of wood in Chris Brown's mouth already - Holy Moly!

RiRi's alien powers are stronger than we thought, because she can shrink her head on command - ICYDK

If only RiRi could've used her powers to make her dress longer, or her crotch higher - Cityrag

Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, November 17th 2009

Afternoon Crumbs

Even vampire sheriffs like Godric from True Blood try to summon the power of the Three Wolf Moon T-shirt - ONTD

Jayde Nicole is freaking everyone out - Hollywood Tuna

Ashley Jizzdale is in a two piece - Egotastic!

Ashlee Simpson or Ali Lohan? - Popsugar

Glamberace's handlers have obviously never seen his album cover - Towleroad

Aaron Eckhart and Molly Sims might be doing it - Just Jared

John Stamos finally got a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame! Kimmy Gibbler better be next! - Lainey Gossip

Daisy Lowe is missing two wolves and a full moon - Holy Moly!

Kunty Karl hates everything - Celebitchy

Interspecies love (No, this is not a post about Khloe & Lamar) - Cityrag

A view from CoCo's luscious silicone mountain tops (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

Every time Ryan Gaycrest gets cut off, Joel McHale has an orgasm - SOW

Wonky's crotch crabs are suffocating - Hollywood Rag

There's only one way to settle this: nekkid oil wrestling - I'm Not Obsessed

Hopefully Katherine Hagel is moving to a distant planet - ICYDK

Posted by: Michael K


Monday, November 16th 2009

Afternoon Crumbs

The loneliest woman in the world is looking totally miserable in Mexico. Once again, Maddox made me write that. - Egotastic!

Just like her daddy, Suri Cruise is not taking off her kitten heels anytime soon - Popsugar

Carrie Prejean WHO? (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

Hayden Panatroll or a middle-aged divorcee who is trying to sex up her look with bangs? - Hollywood Tuna

Why is David Beckham's old hair hanging off of Posh's bag? - Just Jared

According to John Mayer, you really haven't danced unless you've busted a move around a bunch of sweaty shirtless dudes with peen-hongray eyes. I agree. - Towleroad

Prank you very much - Cityrag

The only interesting thing about Reese Witherspoon - Hollywood Rag

Rosie O'Donnell and her wife Kelli stopped scissoring years ago - Celebitchy

Chloe Sevigny demonstrates how you ho up an outfit in one easy step - ICYDK

Is this an invitation, Kanye? - Holy Moly!

But will Daniel Craig give you the ring off his cock? - Socialite Life

Sarah Jessica Parker's return to television! - SOW

The exact moment that Jenna Elfman's son realized his name is Story - I'm Not Obsessed

Posted by: Michael K


Friday, November 13th 2009

Afternoon Crumbs

Levi Johnston's Playgirl shoot involves a hockey stick. I hope the hockey stick is on birth control - Towleroad

Tricia Helfer in a state of what you might call "totally fucking nekkid" - Egotastic!

Fergie should use that finger for better things, like plugging up her leaky beaver - Hollywood Tuna

The paint is drying - Popsugar

Wake me when the pictures from New Moon's Chernobyl premiere come out - Lainey Gosisp

RiRi almost gets scratched out by a cat - Just Jared

There's only one way to settle this: a cage match between Colbert and a jar of Miracle Whip - Best Week Ever

SamRo and her new piece (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

Indiana Jones and the Wig Crypt of Doom - Hollywood Rag

Some bitch tried to get a bunch of cash out of Cindy Crawford - I'm Not Obsessed

Chris Pine is Breakout Something of the Year - ICYDK

Stephen Colbert shaves Woody Harrelson's bald spot for the troops - Celebitchy

Even shiny unicorns and smiley suns can't distract us from LiLo's meth face - Cityrag

Mimi and her friend bump guts - Socialite Life

Posted by: Michael K


Thursday, November 12th 2009

Afternoon Crumbs

Not only are Asshole and Pete sharing skinny jeans and tampons, but now they are sharing hair dye - Popsugar

Brooke Hogan may finally get a magazine cover now- Towleroad

File this with the rest of RiRi's nip "on purpose" slips - Egotastic!

Rachel McAdams might play a black pussy in Spiderman 4 - Lainey Gossip

SHIT IS ME! I mistook Kellie Pickler for Christina Hendricks. My nipples will never forgive me for this - Just Jared

Did ScarJo's chichis shrink or is black that slimming? - Hollywood Tuna

A truly beautiful Jennifer Aniston picture (but she has nothing to do with it) - Cityrag

How can Joe Perry deny a motherfucker rainbow? - Hollywood Rag

Robin Wright Penn or Demi Moore on too much testosterone? - ICYDK

George Clooney's beard works the famewhore stroll (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

A treasure chest full of caca-covered gems from Professor Whore Face - Celebitchy

No more Hank. No more Dollhouse. Your TV won't even notice - SOW

The good news is that Coleen Rooney's baby got a shot of whiskey in his titty leche - Holy Moly!

Nicole Kidman suffocating her ice balls at the CMAs - Socialite Life

Meanwhile, Balloon Boy and his brothers are still being raised by two brain-dead fucktards. That is a life sentence! - I'm Not Obsessed

Posted by: Michael K


Wednesday, November 11th 2009

Afternoon Crumbs

Men who look like old lesbians: The Tommy Cooze edition - Just Jared

Katharine McPhee or Carolina Herrera after a face-lift? - Hollywood Tuna

Ashley Greene in Maxim - Egotastic!

Fire on ice - Popsugar

James Franco's GH promo needs more bare nipples - Lainey Gossip

Did Glee's main gay skip back into the glass closet? - Towleroad

Aubrey O'Day and her new Wino-approved lips keep it elegant in Maxim (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

Gay - Holy Moly!

St. Angie isn't hanging up on Jon Voight's face anymore - I'm Not Obsessed

Kristin Cavallari wearing Justin Bobby's long ass hairs as a vest - Hollywood Rag

Lindsay Lohan is a cutter. Michael Lohan wants you to know that - Celebitchy

Julianne Hough is singular now - SOW

Winona Ryder is still working - ICYDK

Javier Bardem, just because - Socialite Life

Let's celebrate Demi Moore's birthday by staring at her vintage bear rug - Cityrag

Posted by: Michael K


Tuesday, November 10th 2009

Afternoon Crumbs

FINALLY! An entire site devoted to calling out bitches for making "duckface" aka "queef face" aka "pruneface." Although, I know my picture will show up on that shit soon. - Antiduckface (via Buzzfeed)

One of the Twilight hos got nekkid for Peta. Tell your sex holes to calm down, because it's not RPattz - Egotastic!

Tila Tequila has no idea who the Yankees are, right? She just wanted a reason to do ho shit - Hollywood Tuna

Jakey G should have charmed the ostrich by doing the "Dance of the Hours" from Fantasia. You know he knows that shit - Towleroad

Xtina cut the polyester out - Just Jared

The Gossip Girl threesome was about as sexy as one of Hilary Duff's gigantic Chiclets (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

St. Angie's angel-carried chariot must be in the shop - Popsugar

The older version of Kate Bosworth runs - Lainey Gossip

When you see the words "Pamela Anderson" you should know that pictures of her saggy nalgas will follow - Hollywood Rag

Cereal killers - Cityrag

Jon Gosselin needs to take his case to Judge Judy so she can turn him inside/out - ICYDK

Brit Brit's bits make Joel Madden walk out of an interview - Celebitchy

Jerry Stiller just found his next starring vehicle - Paste

It ain't a real Full House reunion unless Kimmy Gibbler is front and center - SOW

Not since Heather Mills have the Beatles been so violated - Socialite Life

Maybe the lady thought Kim Kardashian was pregnant in her ass? It's an honest mistake - I'm Not Obsessed

Vadge goes to Brazil to meet Baby Jesus' mother....who is young enough to be her daughter - Holy Moly!

The return of Geisy Arruda - Jezebel

Posted by: Michael K


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