Moobs

What about the sexy hunk sleeping behind him?! That's who the paps should be shooting. Wait...maybe the dude is dead. Naw, he's just taking a little kitten nap on those luscious chichis of his. Matt Dillon is too vain to realize the raw hotness behind him.

I also can't tell if Matt has pecs or moobs underneath that shirt. Either way, I'd still motorboat.

Here's Matt and sleepy sexy hunk in NYC the other day.

The Hoff looks like shit! He should be laying down in a hospital bed with an IV in his arm not eating sushi at Coachella! The Hoff was actually in a hospital bed of a few days ago. He was in the hospital, because an open wound in his eyes began bleeding. Eye lift gone wrong!

His tit sweat in the pictures below look like two little alien eyes. Tom Cruise would totally lick that up. I've also thrown in some pictures of that hot bitch Janice Dickinson Steven Tyler.

These are the only words that can be used to describe Dog Chapman and Beth Smith. You can also use the three words I tagged this post with. Take your pick.

Here's Dog and Beth probably buying generic bleach, RID hair lice removal cream and KY jelly at CVS in Malibu yesterday.

The gardener from Desperate Housewives got hairy! I refuse to believe that Jesse Metcalfe is capable of growing body hair, so I'm just going to assume he glued fake hair to his chest and nips for these pictures that were uploaded to his MySpace.

I'm not going to lie. I'd motorboat! It might be a little difficult since it looks like he just has one giant moob. Hey, one giant moob equals one giant party!