Ashton Kutcher

Justin Timberfake wants everyone to know that he's the tool responsible for bringing the nauseating trucker cap trend to the masses. He told Fashion Rocks (via Marc Malkin), “It’s funny. I keep hearing Ashton Kutcher say how he was responsible for trucker caps. I’ve heard him make that statement before. Trace and I were wearing them when we were seventeen."

Hos have been wearing fugly ass trucker caps since the beginning of time. Jesus even wore one. Seriously, the fact that Justin wants credit for that ugly shit confirms his status as one of the biggest twats in history.

I'd rather wear a (DO NOT CLICK) diseased penis (DON'T) on my head than a nasty trucker cap.

The coffee might have not kicked in yet, so it could just be me, but something is off about these pictures of Demi Moore. The woman is usually the hottest cougar in the room. Ashton Kutcher's fugness is probably reflecting onto her. He's slowly sucking the hot (thanks to $500,000 worth of plastic surgery) out of her. It's divorce time. When someone starts fucking with your looks, the marriage is over.

I still don't know what she sees in his hairy ass (and you know that shit is hairy). Seriously, he probably poops out hair balls. I know the woman isn't dickmatized. Ashton totally has taquito dick. It's short, skinny and full of cheese.

Wait....is 45-year-old Demi knocked up? Ack! She sort of has that pregnant bloat. Well, she can't do much worse than the first batch.

Here's coyote boy and Demi at the 7th Annual Chrysalis Butterfly Ball last night.