John Travolta

In the Bahamas, a judge shouted "MISTRIAL!" in the John Travolta extortion case due to possible shady jury behavior. Two people were on trial for allegedly trying to snatch $25 million from the Travolta family in exchange for their silence regarding details about their son's death in the Bahamas. Apparently, one of the defendants, an ambulance driver, threatened to tell the media that John was responsible for his son's death.

The trial went on for four looong weeks, and a verdict was expected at any minute. But last night, Picewill Forbes, a member of Parliament, announced at a political convention that defendant Pleasant Bridgewater (who should have been a 70s casino singer instead of an extorter) was acquitted of all charges. This was before an official verdict was announced by the jury. The judge in the case thinks that one of the jury members might have ran off and whispered the verdict into the politician's ear.

The judge ordered a retrial. John Travolta's attorney said that the whole thing is "weird," but his client will cooperate with the prosecution and testify again in the new trial. That's if the evil Pleasant Bridgewater even makes it to a new trial. I wouldn't be surprised if Pleasant Bridgewater suddenly disappears from real-life. Don't mess with Ron!

Source: The Los Angeles Times

I am a zillion light years late with this, but I was traveling back from California to NYC for most of today. I know I just disappeared. I figured I'd write a note to you bitches in the terminal, but Long Beach Airport's janky ass internet was not cooperating, so I had to nix it. But here's the story. Skip it if you've heard it a million times already.

John Travolta and Kelly Preston's 16-year-old son, Jett, died in the Bahamas while he was on vacation with his family. Jett was last seen going into the bathroom in one his family's suites at the Old Bahama Bay Hotel last night. His body wasn't discovered until 10 this morning by his caretaker, Jeff Michael Kathrein. Jeff is the blondie in the picture below and he was also caught kissing on John Travolta back in 2006.

TMZ says that the police report states Jett suffered a seizure and hit his head on the bathtub. John's attorney said his son died at the scene after attempts to revive him were unsuccessful. His attorney also said that Jett had a history of seizures.

There were rumors that Jett was Autistic, but John has always denied this and even threatened to sue over it. John said Jett had Kawasaki Syndrome, a disorder that can lead to heart disease. Kelly Preston later blamed household cleaners for all of Jett's health problems. She said one of L. Ron Hubbard's detoxification programs helped Jett.

An autopsy is being performed on Jett to find the exact cause of death.

I'll admit that when I first heard about this, the word "Scientology" came at me in big evil letters, but we won't know anything until the autopsy. When I was on the plane, the women behind me were watching this story on Larry King and totally saying all this crazy shit. People were totally giving them the side-eye. They should've wrote this post. All I know is that this sad all around and I will leave it at that.

I don't like the looks of this picture. They both have their eyes partly closed in a sexual way, Johnny Travolta is slightly puckering his lips and JRM's hands aren't where we can see them. Johnny is definitely jizzing in his big girl panties. That bloody shit on JRM isn't ketchup bukkake, it's the real thing. When Johnny flashed his lil' L. Ron Hubbard, JRM probably passed out on the floor and suffered a major concussion.

If you're looking at these pictures of Johnny and feeling tingly in the crotch (you know who you are), then please do your genitals a favor and get some much needed help. Your genitals deserve better than this.

Here's more of Johnny looking like a cross between Yogi Bear and Mr. Magoo while filming some crap movie with JRM in Paris.

That puss tart Johnny Travolta got me! I actually believed that he got rid of the dead beaver that sat on his head. I mean, the other day he looked as bald as HoHan's punane and now he's back to wearing plugs or Tommy Girl's pubic hair on his head. He was obviously wearing a bald cap the other day. Unless, he planted some barley seeds on his head, Xenu pissed on it and hair magically grew! With or without hair, he still looks like he's ready for a cum fart to the face.

Here's Tommy's scissor sister promoting that dumb "Bolt' movie in NYC this morning.

Today in Los Angeles, John Travolta wiped Tommy Girl's saliva from his hungry hole, glued a shaved beaver's ass on his head, put on his big boy pilot costume and headed over to LAX to celebrate the inaugural flight of Qantus airlines brand new Airbus A38.

Don't worry, Johnny didn't fly that plane. He was just there to look like big queen and ass queef over the new plane.

Here's more of the seventh member of the Village People, the dead creature on his head and Olivia Newton-John in Los Angeles today.

In more "We need to blow up Hollywood" news, John Waters is currently working on a sequel to the movie musical version of "Hairspray." Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman, who wrote the songs for the Broadway musical, will also be back to write the songs for the sequel. The first movie's director, Adam Shankman, has also signed up to repeat his duties.

New Line is aiming for a July 2010 release. They are hoping to reunite the original cast which included John Travolta, Zac Efron, Christopher Walken, Michelle Pfeiffer, Queen Latifah, Nikki Blonsky and Brittany Snow. The sequel will pick up right where the first one ended.

I'll be surprised if Michelle Pfeiffer agrees to this fuckery. Didn't she learn anything from "Grease 2"? "I want a coooooool rider, A cool, cool, cool, cool rider....." What am I saying? That movie changed my life.

You know John Travolta just wants a reason to get back into that costume. He never felt so alive in his life. He probably had to wear diapers the entire time because he kept creaming himself, he was so happy. Shit, he probably wears that outfit at home and dances with his life-size cut out of Zac Efron.

I also blame GREED for this. John Waters probably made a shit load off of the "Hairspray" musical and now he just can't get enough. John, just say NO to a "Hairspray" sequel. But just say YES to a "Serial Mom" sequel.

Source

Thanks Zeke

John Revolta is still working that leather bear daddy look. You know Tommy Girl dresses up like Boo Boo from Yogi Bear and they play "hide the honey pot."

I can't look at these pictures of Johnny without imagining a butt plug in his a-hole, clamps on his nippies and a leather ring on his man clit.

Here's John with Nick Loren at Nick's album release party in NYC last night.