Anderson Cooper

And we're off! Michael Lohan, being the publicity hungry attention whore that he is, has issued his own statement to Access Hollywood regarding Anderson Cooper's comments about Ali Lohan looking like a 60-year-old. Click here to get the whole run down if you have no idea what's going on. Well, have a drink and an Oreo first.

Michael removed his head out of his loosey goosey ass (he was in prison) long enought to say, “I think Anderson Cooper is an opinionated, hypocritical idiot who should be an adult and keep his opinion to himself. He is the last person to judge anyone, when he and his own family have their own issues.” Don't worry his head went right back in after he issued this statement.

Let's see, White Oprah whores out her family on reality television and we're not allowed to have opinions about it? Michael needs to wipe the coke from the mirror and take a good look. He's probably creaming in his dad jeans at all the attention his family is getting over this shit.

Will Anderson Cooper please enlighten us with more of his bitchy words of wisdom? I await his guidance.

P.S. - Am I the only one that secretly wants to see Andy and Michael Lohan make out? Ugh. I feel so dirty and dark-sided. I need a cold shower.

The Silver Fox has once again taken out his claws and sunk them into White Oprah. It's going to take weeeeks to get the grease out of his claws. As you know, Anderson Cooper basically called Ali Lohan an alleged 14-year-old who wants to be a striptease person on "Regis & Kelly" yesterday morning.

White Oprah responded with, "People are just cruel! This is bad karma for him." Seriously, that's all she said. I feel totally ripped off.

Well, Andy has kept the fun and games going. Last night, he responded to her response. He said that White Oprah probably didn't see his comment live "because she was out clubbing and it's on early in the morning. So she was probably just rollin' home." He went on to say that he "feels bad" for Ali Lohan, but that she shouldn't be in a shitty reality show.

I just want to be put on a rubber suit and go silver diving into Andy's pubic bush. I especially love it when he giggles like a Tickle Me Elmo doll.

This is White Oprah's second chance to really come back with the statement of all statements! Or they can settle it the way I always like to settle things: CAGE FIGHT! White Oprah already comes oiled up. And I'm sure Andy already has the outfit.

VIA ONTD

Anderson Cooper filled in for Regis on "Regis & Kelly" this morning and the conversation turned to the Long Island trainwreck known as "Living Lohan."

Andy must have thought he was having cosmos with the girls, because he said, “Ali Lohan is supposed to be 14 but really she’s more like 60." What a bitch! Andy can slap me on the ass and call me 60 any day.

And do you hear that? It's the sound of White Oprah busting out of her third spray tanning session of the day and running to her computer. She's going to put those Lee Press-Ons to fucking work. Andy better shut down his inbox, because here comes one of White Oprah's long ass statements and you know that bitch asks for a return receipt.

White Oprah doesn't know who she's messing with. If that bitch fucks with MAH BOO, I will rip off Ali's annoying choker and use it to whip the bullshit out of White Oprah.

UPDATE: Here's the video of Anderson ripping into "Living Lohan." We truly need to become best girlfriends.

VIA Lainey Gossip

Thanks Debra