Lady GaGa

Are you feeling too smart today? Do you want to feel dumber? Well, watch this entire video and your brain cells will quickly start exploding one by one. Before you know it, you'll be babbling incoherently just like Wonky and Lady CaCa.

This brain killing clip is of Wonky "interviewing" Lady CaCa in some rundown storage room (how fitting) at a club in London during a Nokia event. Wonky talks like she has a dick in her mouth, because she usually does. Lady CaCa talks like she just gargled with a gallon of cokey water (and swallowed a lot of it). But in her defense, being that close to Wonky makes you dumb. Scientific fact.

Seriously, a frozen dog turd and a Kim Zolciak's road kill wig could have a more intelligent conversation than these two fucktards.

And make sure to watch the 1:42 mark to see Wonky's "special needs gorilla" dance.

So this the kind of kinky shit Bert from Sesame Street does on the weekends!! I knew he was a cross-dresser. But seriously, this is a new photoshoot of the natural beauty known as Lady GaGa. Or should I say Lady GAWDCOVERUPYOURFACE. Her Poker Face is more like a Porky Face. Sorry, but the truth hurts. Well, these pictures of what Lady GaGa really looks like hurts more than the truth.

Here's some more stunningness (we make up words here) to go with your morning Sanka. I also threw in some pictures of Lady CaCaFace arriving at Heathrow yesterday. It's amazing what a pair of large sunglasses, ten pounds of make-up, a blonde wig and a gay hat can do.

Lady CaCa is over in the UK promoting the no-pants movement and this is the kind of shit she's been wearing around town. I'm pretty sure it's not summertime over there, so I don't know how the bitch isn't freezing her labia lips off. The crotch isn't even bothered by the damn cold. Seriously, I wish I could do that shit. I'd wear my coochie cutters all day, every day. Whatever her secret is, she should bottle it, so everyone can dress like a hooker all-year round.

Oh, wait. I think she must have that special famewhore gene. It allows you to continue your attention whoring ways without being bothered by the elements. A straight-up ice storm could roll through but bitch's famewhore gene will keep her toasty.

No, it's really Lady GaGa, but my bleary eyes thought I was looking at Tranny Clown for a quick minute. And then I thought it was Donatella Versace with fancy lighting and CGI work.

Below is Lady GaGa's new video for some song called "Poker Face" If you say it really fast, it sounds like "pork her face."

I'm not sure about this shit. It would be mesmerizing if I was on a Kerry Katona high, but alas that is not the case. But I am sure that I love those pony dogs at the beginning. I want one of those! I'd ride sidesaddle on it down the street while feeding it Snausages. The fun and games would end when it would need to squeeze out a butt boulder. I'm sorry, but I like my Mudslides in a glass, on ice and with a little Hershey's syrup around the rim.

Click here if you can't see the video above.