Open Post

It's been Harvey Day every day ever since he's been in Los Angeles. He needs to get on the next private jet (that's the only way he rolls) to NYC, so he can melt this dirty ass snow with his smile made out of sunshine and Mother's Cookies! But Harvey can leave his greasy chicken bone of a mommy at home. What is this bitch wearing? That was very rude of her to wear a blindingly bright outfit around Harvey. Even he thinks her "morning shift stripper goes to the PTA meeting" outfit is not appropriate anytime, any place, any fucking where. Those were probably his exact words.

Look at him. He's trying to distance himself from that walking embarrassment. Katie needs to stop playing around and give Glimmer from She-Ra her boots back!

It's been a while since we've been visited by the hottest junkie on that side of the Atlantic (Busey has that title over here) and Dreamboat Doherty even wore a bib for you! Actually, it wasn't for you. It's for him. It's just in case any rogue coke snots fall out of his nose or something. IN THIS ECONOMY, Dreamy can't afford to lose one cokey morsel. At the end of the day, he twists that bib napkin over one of his black hole nostrils. One crafty cokey!

Here's Dreamy making French drug dealers bust nuts while visiting Paris yesterday. And in thumbnail #2, that's the luckiest guitar pick that ever existed. It has Syphilis now, but it would agree with me that it's worth it.

The inevitable remix of Christian Bale's fuck-filled epic rant has arrived. This is going to straight to the top of the dance charts. I always new Christian Bale would be a techno chanteuse one day.

Barbara Streisand even makes a came!!! In my version of heaven, this is what they will play in the elevator. FUCK after FUCK after FUCK! It still needs more FUCK!

Let's all drop some E, trash the lights and then give each other glow stick shows while bouncing to this shit. FUCK!

Whitney Houston and Bobby Kris have flow in to host this open post for you. Yeah, so you might want to stick the crack pipes underneath the sofa for now. You can bring them back out during the next open post.

And Whitney isn't flashing the peace sign. To her, that's the "crack is whack" sign. Or maybe the "Got a doody double? My two fingers can help!" sign? Probably the latter.

Jonathan Rhys Meyers was at Macy's in NYC yesterday whoring out his new cokey juice for Hugo Boss sporting a little evil skinnystache. This is the kind of shit that should only be worn by cartoon villains who stroke that shit while plotting the end of the world. Or something. Actually, moustaches with eating disorders are also for smart cokey faces who want to wear a stache, but are afraid of getting too much nose sugar all over it. That way JRM can snort without having to worry about his stache getting covered in disco snow. Well played.

And if you ever need to find the way to Colombia and don't have a map handy, just look into JRM's eyes and he'll show you the way.

This is an open post. Talk about JRM, skinnystaches or whatever else you want to rant about on a Saturday night. If JRM isn't your poison, I also threw in some Jakey G at the Santa Barbara Film Festival yesterday. Jakey should find out who's grooming JRM's skinnystache, because he needs that bitch to work on his damn brows. Power bottoms shouldn't go around with pube bushes over their eyes.

Here is the long-awaited sequel to Cat on a Roomba. Don't worry, a KITTEH was not harmed in the making of this shit. One or two might have gotten a case of the dizzies, though. This YouTube clip should become a full-fledged game show. That's what it feels like I'm watching. SPOILER ALERT: I just knew the greyish and white kitten would be the last one on the Roomba. He has determination in his eyes.

The pair of moobs that makes a cameo at the 0:45 second was an interesting surprise.

So! This is your open post. Talk about moobs, furry pussy balls, Roombas or anything else you want. You can also place bets on who you think will win the Puppy Bowl on Sunday. That's what I'm watching all day. I've got my dollars on Moose!

VIA Videogum

The title says it all. This is an open post where you can talk about whatever, but I hope you talk about this bitch falling on her face in a convention center (or wherever the fuck she is). I'm having a hard time putting this wonderful moment into words even though I've watched it eleventy times. I love seeing people eat floor, but seeing them eat floor while riding on a Segway is even better. Way better. And yes, I'll probably be ran over by a Segway sometime today for laughing at this shit, but it will be worth it.

VIA Buzzfeed

Here's some new pictures of Chester's favorite little Cheetoling from her official website of her practicing her "sexy awesome moves y'all" for her "I Know Karate & Karazy" world tour. If those sweats were any lower, I'd see her Cheetodingles.

You know, I tried to get tickets for that shit, but I need to be on the floor so I can fully take in all her Cheetoness. Most of the floor is standing only! Eff the fuck that! Standing is my least favorite thing to do. I'm one of those dudes that have been known to piss sitting down, because I'm too lazy to stand for 5 seconds. Even for Brit Brit. And I was totally going to make her a bouquet made out of Slim Jims.

So this is an open post where you can talk about Brit Brit's Cheetodingles or whatever the fuck your little black heart desires.

This shit really looks like a Wet Seal store from 1994 exploded all over a super plus tampon. It's just the motherfucking punk rock tardess Avil Lavigne wearing her new line of short bus clothes for Kohl's called "Abbey Dawn." Abbey Dawn is Doucheanese for "Look like a special needs hooker."

This bitch suffers from the Wonky McValtrex disorder known as "still dressing like you're fucking 12." Avril should just stop trying and go retire on a maple syrup far or something. Her career has already reach its peak when she released the epic punk rock masterpiece that is SK8R BOI.

Oh, to be an old timey road map in the dashboard of that car with these two hot bitches. Sophie Loren really knows how to ride in a convertible through Milan. Bitchface out, hand lightly on head and eyebrows in check. Whenever riding with the top down, you want to make sure you either paint your brows Loren-style or gel them down with some Dep gel so the wind doesn't blow them out of place.

Here's Sophia and DDL currently shooting that Nine shit in Rome. I feel like I'm going to love this shit until Nicole Kidman and her Jabbawockeez face pop on the screen to fuck it up.

(Open post = all topics welcome)