Pete Doherty

Dreamboat Pete Doherty plans to visit several public housing projects in England to help out heroin addicts. A laugh! Pete is doing it all for a new reality show. He will stay with families in the housing projects and work with the heroin addicted youth.

A source said, “Pete really hopes to be able to use his own experiences to help these youths. Hopefully they will be inspired by his visit.”

Inspired? They are probably shitting themselves. Well, shitting themselves, because heroin addicts tend to do that. They are excited, because Petey will teach them how to shoot heroin through their pee hole and hide crack in their ass hole. It's probably the first time in their lives they will actually sit and take notes.

Petey is also helping Wino's Blake Incarcerated. Pete is trying to get Blaaake to have an opiate-suppressing implant put in to help him kick drugs. Pete claims it helped him. Oh please! Pete probably pulled that implant out, cooked it up and then smoked it.

Pete's new reality show is set to premiere later this year.

Source

Dreamboat Doherty has a YouTube account where he uploads videos of himself usually singing to his cats. You know, thrilling shit like that. Yesterday, he uploaded a really short video of him puffing smoke out of some sort of chicken pipe. I want that chicken pipe! I would put incense in it though. Uh huh.

Several of the comments say it's tobacco and not crack. This is Pete Doherty we're talking about. It could be fucking anything. It could be crack, jenkem, freon, anything. He's creative.

That being said, it's kind of hot watching Dreamboat rim a chicken. I'm sure he used tongue.

VIA ONTD

Dreamboat Pete Doherty was named "Hero of the Year" at the NME Awards. NME readers voted Pete to win the award. The night before the NME show, Dreamboat performed in London with a bloody nose. He said he got into a little "scrap with his cat." I think that's crack talk for "I did too much coke off of a whore's pussy."

Congrats to Pete for winning this high honor! He's my hero every day of the week. Oh and if you ever catch anyone you care about doing too many drugs and you want to help them, show them this picture and that will set them straight.

Thanks Peaches

Dreamboat Pete Doherty turned down an offer to model for Lastseason.com, because the money wasn't good enough. The website offered him $10,000, because they heard he was hurting for some dough. Petey countered with $60,000. Bare minimum. No he wasn't high at the same he turned down the offer. Actually, I take that back. Pete is probably always high. Crack smoke is to him like oxygen is to us.

His management wrote the website, "The fee on this would be a bare minimum of 30,000 pounds before we even begin to discuss anything."

The site owner, Stefano Passantino, said, "When they said £30,000 I nearly had a heart attack. Who does the bloke think he is, Claudia Schiffer? I thought Pete could do with a day's work for what would be good money by anyone's standards. He is just not worth that much."

Now that Pete was paid $30k to perform for a millionaire, he thinks he's actually worth shit. He's adopting the Linda Evangelista motto of not getting out of bed for less than 10 grand a day, but he's raising her shit by 50 grand.

I hope that egg crate Petey is sleeping on at home is like a bed of a thousand clouds, because he's going to be laying on that shit for a long time.

Source - Image: Pacific Coast News

American computer game tycoon, Greg Thomas, paid Dreamboat Pete Doherty $30,000 to perform for him in private. Get this shit. Greg and his wife flew from California to England, so that Pete could serenade them in Pete's own living room. Greg was told the concert would start at 9pm, but when he showed up, Pete was too fucked up too perform. Greg went back to his hotel and returned at 3am for the show.

While everyone was waiting for Pete to sober up the performance, Pete's friend said, "This guy loves Pete. It's going to be really great. I just hope Pete is straight enough to perform. I think someone might have given him some drugs as he's out of it at the moment. But I'm going to wake him up when they get here." Someone gave him drugs? Does Pete have several personalities, because I'm pretty sure he gave them to himself.

Greg and his wife stayed most of the morning and even videotaped the performance and got some pictures and autographs from Pete. They also probably left with some sort of jungle disease from sitting on Pete's furniture. I bet they weren't planning on that.

Pete said, "The gig went really well. It was really nice. I got to try out lots of new material. These people were real aficionados. They certainly know their stuff. Everything I played went down really well, from old songs all the way through to my new stuff which no one's heard. They were a really nice couple as well. They've got three children and it was just nice all round, all for a bit of pocket money."

Pete Doherty himself isn't even worth $30,000! These rich people are all sorts of eccentric. I pay $30,000 and I have to come to you and wait around? Greg Thomas has a crazy Doherty fetish. That being said, I need to get with Greg Thomas right away. It's the only way I can be near Dreamboat.

Image: Pacific Coast News

This gives you guys plenty of time to save your pennies. Hell, skip your afternoon Snicker break once a week and put that change into the MK Barfday fund. For what reason? You see, Pete Doherty is doing parties now! For just $200 Dreamboat will show up and perform on your special day. It all started when a father asked Pete to play his daughter's birthday party. His YOUNG daughter's birthday party. I'm not sure what that daddy was smoking, but that's probably how it all started. A conversation in a crack den!

A source told The Sun “The birthday girl’s dad told him she was a huge fan and that he’d give him £100 to perform at her party. Pete was flattered and happy to oblige. He turned up and played his big hits . Everyone had a great time."

The dad told a local paper and Dreamboat's agent has been bombarded with requests. This is a fucking steal! Celine Dion charges $6 million. Would Celine do a body shot on you? Probably not, but I bet you Dreamboat would. You would be laid up in the free clinic for a few days, but it would be worth it.

Pete Doherty playing his songs for a bunch of children sounds sweet. The love probably ended when the kids found out he sucked all the helium out of their balloons. Nothing ruins a Birthday party like saggy balloons.

Image: Fame Pictures

Thanks Guy

Here's some lovely photographs of a lovely man, Pete Doherty, skipping down the streets of gay Paree today. Ignore the lady, she's a hag. I shouldn't say that. If she's fucking Pete, she's a hag. If she isn't, she's a beautiful person. I really wish he would change that calico cat hair color. Other than that...he's a dream.

Oh and he will also be playing the Rock Against Racism event this weekend. Ya see, Dreamboat cares about important issues. It's probably an open bar and that's why he's playing.

Splashnewsonline.com

Towleroad has some pictures from 2004 of Dreamboat Doherty homo-kissing Peter Wolfe. Peter is one of Dreamboat's best girlfriends. Apparently, it was for some photo shoot. Rock dudes are just like skanky strippers. They kiss the same sex, because they think it's edgy and cool.

It looks so tender, but Peter doesn't look that into it. He can probably taste the hep on Dreamy's breath. I would just pinch my nose and deal with the stench.

Honestly, it makes me happier picturing Dreamboat sitting at that little vanity putting on his perfume and combing his locks with a silver brush.

This is a truly touching and beautiful story. Pete Doherty has been known to feed crack to his cats, but it seems like he's turned a new leaf. Pete found a one-legged hedgehog on the side of the road. He has fallen in love with it and named it Mrs Tiggy-Winkle. Pete took Mrs. T to the vet and also set up a special area for her in his garden.

A friend of Pete's told the Daily Star that he is a real animal lover and hopes to open up a rescue shelter for animals. The friend said, “Pete has a big heart. He also loves rats and is looking after one with no tail. He has lots of kittens, too, and hopes that by the end of the year he will be able to open his pet rescue centre at Marlborough to local schools so they can educate children about animals.”

Rat with no tail? That sounds like Kate Moss. I still don't trust this new Dreamboat Doherty. This "sitting at home sipping tea and saving animals" Dreamboat Doherty. It's a lie! It's a front.

Something smells fishy and it isn't dried Kate Moss smegma on his dick. He's probably running some animal drug ring. Mrs Tiggy-Winkle Full of Grace!

VIA Celebitchy

A 20-year-old girl has come forward claiming she's 3-months knocked up with Pete Doherty's baby. Laura McLaughlin is the god-daughter of Sir Alex Ferguson who runs the Manchester United football team. She told the News of the World that she knows Dreamboat is the father, because he popped her cherry. She said she met him a year ago through mutual friends.

Laura is the daughter of a multi-millionaire and plans to attend Harvard law. She claims her unborn baby was conceived after a sex-fuelled weekend with Dreamboat in October. She never told him she was a virgin. She said they used condoms, but on their last night together the condom broke.

She said, "We continued to have sex regardless as it was the last condom we had."

Laura told Dreamboat that she was carrying his baby over Christmas. He asked her if she was sure it was his. She said, "His apathy has been traumatic for me. I wanted the baby to be as big a deal to him as it was to me. But it wasn't. One minute he is excited and telling me, ‘How good-looking is our baby going to be?' the next minute he's saying, ‘You deal with it'."

Laura has yet to tell her parents, but I'm pretty sure they know now. Pete's rep denies that he's ever met Laura. Dreamboat already has one kid.

People should not use condoms when sexing with Pete. They should use a straight-up bodysuit along with gallons of antibacterial gel. Actually, scratch all that. They should only have cyber sex with Pete. Even phone sex is too risky.

If she's knocked up with his baby, she's totally going to pop out an 8 ball. She better keep her 8 ball baby away from Dreamboat, because he's going to try and snort it up.

Bitch is lying though. Dreamboat's spermies don't work. The crack killed them all.