Cinema

 

"Prom Night" is one of my favorite horror movies from the 80s and of course Hollyweird has to go and eff it up. Here's the poster for the upcoming remake which stars Brittany Snow, Johnathon Schaech and some nobodies. The original starred Jamie Lee Curtis and Leslie Nielsen.

 

It's basically about these two hot chicks and these two dudes that were involved with the death of a young girl. Years later a crazed killer comes to seek revenge on the teens during their prom night. 

 

Why can't Hollywood come up with new shit? They always have to ruin the classics. Not only are they effing with "Prom Night," but they are also remaking "April Fool's Day" for 2008. Not right.  

 

Poster: Shock Till you Drop 

 

 

 

This past weekend a dozen of 7-Eleven stores across the country turned into Kwik-E-Marts to promote "The Simpsons" movie which hits theaters July 27th. The Kwik-E-Marts will also sell items from the movie like Duff beer, Krusty O's, Squishees and Buzz Cola. 7-Eleven apparently paid for the entire thing.

 

7-Eleven's head bitch said, "We thought if you really want to do something different, the idea of actually changing stores into Kwik-E-Marts was over the top but a natural. It shows they get the joke."

 

It's pretty lame that I actually want to visit one of these. The Kwik-E-Mart locations are NYC, Los Angeles, Chicago, Dallas, Denver, Burbank, Henderson, Orlando, Mountain View, Seattle, Bladensburg and one in Canada. 

 

 

 

 

Source

 

 

 

Mimi will follow-up her star-turning performances in "Glitter" and "Wisegirls" by playing herself in a new Adam Sandler comedy. JoBlo confirms that she will star in YOU DON'T MESS WITH THE ZOHAN. Dennis Dugan who just directed Adam in I NOW PROUNOUNCE YOU CHUCK & LARRY will helm the film which starts in July with shooting in Los Angeles, NYC and Israel.

 

 

Adam wrote the film with comic genius Judd Apatow. This is going to be the best film EVER made. I smell an Oscar for Mimi...no that's just bacon...but either way she'll be happy.

 

 

 

20th Century Fox has purchased the rights to a live-action version film of the mega-popular computer game "The Sims." The computer game is the best-selling of all time with a whopping $1.6 billion in sales worldwide.

 

Fox says it will be live-action.

 

The Sims is a simulated computer game where players determine the careers, love lives, family lives and even personality of the characters in the game.

 

The creators won't have a hard time finding actors for this crap. Most actors in Hollyweird have no emotion and are basic robots. I hope The Sims movie turns out as well as Super Mario Bros. the Movie.

 

Source: Coming Soon

 

 

Spider-Man 3 opened with the biggest opening in movie history. It brought in $148 million in one weekend. It also beat records with the highest opening day ever with $59 on its first day. Internationally the flick made $227 million. Basically, it made a boat load.

 

I don't want to see this trash, because I already asked somebody if Kiki Dunst dies a miserable death. Unfortunately she doesn't, so eff that!

 

Source: Box Office Mojo

 

 

 

 

Let's just blow up Hollywood right now! They are obviously not capable of coming up with original ideas and their run must come to an end. Which brings me to our next story....

 

Nicole Kidman has committed a sin by purchasing the rights to my favorite movie of all-time "How to Marry a Millionaire" as a possible starring vehicle for herself. Nicky has plans to produce the film under 20th Century Fox.

 

The screenwriter from "The Terminal" will overhaul the entire story and bring it update. Yeah, more like MURDER it. This is not right. You can remake anything, but this!

 

The original starred Marilyn Monroe, Betty Grable and Lauren Bacall as hot bitches trying to catch a rich husband. This movie is GOLD and Nicky will pay for this! I'll see you in botox hell!

 

Source: Coming Soon

 

 

 

Why does Hollywood keep giving important roles to sluts who can't act? Is it that hard to find someone who can actually show some emotion? Anyway, Julia Stile's lumpy face will produce and star in a film version of "The Bell Jar."

 

The semi-autobiographical novel by Sylvia Plath tells the story of Esther Greenwood, a young reporter who seeks to make a name for herself in New York but spirals into depression and moves back to Boston. She eventually undergoes electroshock therapy and makes several attempts to take her own life.

 

Shooting is expected to begin later this year.  

 

Was Kate Winslet not available?

 

Source: Coming Soon

 

 

 

The first shot of Heath Ledger as The Joker in the new Batman movie that hit the internet yesterday is a fake. A poster at the Superhero Hype message boards decoded the puzzle. The faker used a picture of Heath Ledger from the "Candy" premiere and also a make-up test shot from "Lord of the Rings" featuring Orlando Bloom to create the fake.

 

Ugh, how am I going to sleep tonight?!

 

 

Spider-Man 3 will be a huge hit when it opens on May 4th. There's no doubt about that. The last film grossed over $1 billion worldwide.  Radar is reporting that the movie cost a mind-boggling $500 million to put together including production costs and marketing. Insiders say production alone cost $350 million.

 

A rep from Sony says it only cost $270 million. Only?! Producer Laura Ziskin said, "I refuse to say the [real] number because it makes me choke. 'Spider-Man 3' was a super-expensive movie - the most expensive film we've ever made. But there's no way you can get to $300 million."

 

I'm sure making Kiki Dunst look halfway decent cost at least $80 million.

 

Source: Page Six and Radar

 

 

 

 

Lindsay Lohan backed out last week of starring in "The Best Time of Our Lives" with Keira Knightley. Sources say that Lindsay didn't like the way the script was coming together. They probably cut all her sex scenes out.

 

Sienna Miller has replaced Lindsay in the film about two women fighting over Welsh poet Dylan Thomas. Keira's mommy wrote the script.

 

Matthew Rhys will play Dylan Thomas, Sienna will play his wife and Keira will play his childhood friend.

 

Shooting begins this May in Wales. Cillian Murphy also stars.

 

Bad teeth alert! I hope they have a dentist on the crew. Sienna makes more sense than Lindsay anyway. At least Sienna can sort of act. Sort of.

 

Source: Coming Soon