African Orphans

Monday, May 5th 2008

Afternoon Crumbs

Lunch time! Pour some fruit over that shit - Hollywood Tuna

Bai Ling really loves to show off her nippies - Egotastic!

Clooney and his call girl invade NYC - Popsugar

Shia LaDouche is growing on me - Just Jared

Ashton Kutcher looking douchier than usual - IDLYITW

The big gay moment on "Brothers and Sisters" - Towleroad

Holly Madison has wonky nipples (site NSFW) - Drunken Stepfather

Skanks at the Kentucky Derby - Hollywood Rag

Tommy Girl rocks the stink eye - Cityrag

Harrison Ford & Bruce Willis still get action - A Socialite's Life

77 comments

African Orphans • Afternoon Crumbs

Friday, April 25th 2008

Madonna Looks So.....Surprised

Madonna was on "Today" this morning to discuss her new chicken cutlets. Actually, she was on to talk to creepy Ann Curry about her documentary called "I Am Because We Are." It's about orphans in Malawi.

She also talked to Ann about her own experiences with adopting little David Banda. Madge said the adoption process has been difficult, confusing and invasive. She said she has been finger printed 20 times and has had social workers come through her home. Of course it's fucking difficult! She's adopting a kid not buying a Volkswagen.

Madge's faux British accent was intact through the whole interview. You know, it didn't bother me. I was too distracted with Ann Curry's creepy soft "interview voice." The bitch has serial killer voice! It's the voice you hear after you've been kidnapped and tied up at the bottom of a well. The serial killer crawls down, holds you, strokes your hair and tells you in creepy Ann Curry voice that everything will be okay. I'd rather hear Madge's phoney British accent than Ann's phoney "I care" voice.

Celebitchy has a transcript of the interview if you care. Below is the video, but let me know if there's issues with RedLasso. I stopped using that shit, because it was freezing up people's browsers (including my own). They claim they fixed their shit and I haven't had a problem, but let me know.

Here's some pics of Madge's new face at the Tribeca Film Festival premiere of documentary in NYC last night. I also threw in some Rosie O'Donnell.

119 comments

Wednesday, February 6th 2008

Baby Number Four?

Posh and Becks have talked about having more children, but it looks like Posh is sick of being pregnant. The two may adopt a baby from African. Becks visited Sierra Leone with UNICEF and that trip moved him to want to adopt an orphan. Becks has apparently even talked to Tom Cruise about it, because Tom has two adopted children.

A source said "Tom has talked to David about how adoption changed him and how he's been able to change the lives of two amazing children." Posh & Becks' spokeswhore deny the claims.

The couple currently have 3 boys.

Talking to Tom about adopting an African orphan? I'm sure Tom told Becks that he will definitely help him if......Becks let's him toss his salad. "Can we talk about this over salads?" Tom knows nothing about adopting! He probably didn't even handle the adoption of his kids. He just told his people that he needed to look softer in the media, so they handled it.

I think it's a good idea for Posh & Becks to adopt. She's always wanted a girl and I don't think it's healthy for her to carry a baby with all those alleged tummy tucks. That baby is going to be trapped. Living in Posh's belly is like living in a Manhattan studio apartment. It's not comfortable.

Here's Posh wearing a robe from Z Gallerie while sashaying through the Toronto airport with Cruz.

Image: INFDaily.com

62 comments

African Orphans • Posh & Becks

Wednesday, November 14th 2007

Zahara Drama

When Angelina Jolie introduced Zahara to the world she said she was an AIDS orphan. However, a woman claiming to be Zahara's birth mother talked to InTouch .

24-year-old Mentewab Dawit Lebiso told the magazine, "I want my daughter to come home to see where she is from. Her grandmother and I both tried very hard to raise her, and I want her to come home to regain her identity."

She said Zahara was conceived when she was raped by a stranger. After giving birth to Zahara in January of 2005 she left her, because there was no food and she thought Zahara was going to die.

"I thought the baby was going to die because there was no food, so I ran away."

Z's grandmother signed her over to an adoption agency. They say someone told the agency Z's mother was dead. The woman claims she never signed the adoption papers which means she could have a case in getting Z back.

The adoption agency says they have papers that Z's grandmother signed stating her daughter was dead.

Angelina is apparently aware that a woman has come forward claiming to be Z's mother.

Going up against Brangelina? Good luck with that. Even if the woman is Z's mother that doesn't mean anything. She ran away from baby Z, because she thought Z was going to die. Does that make any sense?

This also isn't the first time women have come forward claiming to be related to Z. A couple of years ago a woman claimed to be her mother. It was proven false.

The agency stands by their claim that Zahara's mother passed away.

Dramz.

273 comments

African Orphans • Brangelina

Tuesday, September 18th 2007

Madonna Is Mother Of The Year!!

I thought I'd use a picture of a shirtless Guy Ritchie for this story even though it's not really about him. He ain't so bad actually. Looks like a bulldog, but that's never stopped me in the past.

ANYWAYS, Madonna has been declared to be a "perfect mum" after a visit by Malawi's social services. Madge can officially adopt David Banda after a 3-day visit from Simon Chisale, Malawi's chief social welfare officer.

Here's all the wonderful things Simon noticed:

Madonna built a special African zoo room where all the children can learn about David's birthplace

Madonna likes to bake cakes

Madonna's carpets are so luxurious it feels like walking on live sheep

Lourdes and Madonna are learning David's native Chichewa language

Madonna is planning to build her own orphanage in Africa where children will learn Kabbalah beliefs

Here we go with that kabbalahwallaballaa shit again. Save it Madge! Put it in the bank. Those African kids don't want to learn about that shit! Don't they have their own spiritual beliefs?!

I don't want to walk on live sheeps!!! That'll hurt them. It's not nice and it's not luxurious.

And I'm sure this is how the visit really went down, "Ello Mr. Social Services Man. My name is Madonna and here is a check for 3 million pounds. Have some tea? Blimey! Pip pip, Cheerio!"

Source

68 comments

African Orphans • Madonna

Tuesday, September 18th 2007

I Bless The Rains Down In Africa

"Gonna take some time to do the things we never haaaaaad!" Sorry everytime I hear the word Africa I think of that damn Toto song. Did they even have any other hits? That's my favorite elevator jam of all-time.

So...Weeds star Mary-Louise Parker has adopted a little baby girl from Africa. Her rep declined to give any kind of information. Mary-Louise and her new bundle were spotted all over Los Angeles over the weekend. Mary-Louise, 43, has one 3-year-old son with Billy Crudup. Remember, he left her ass knocked up for Claire Danes. What a skank he is!

I like her and I like the fact that she was low-key about it or is it that nobody cares? Well, good for her I say!

Source: People

213 comments

African Orphans • Buying Children

Tuesday, August 28th 2007

A Little Misunderstanding

Madonna's adoption of David Banda was in jeopardy, because the social worker assigned to her case was barred from traveling to London by Malawi. It was reported that Madonna herself paid for the man's plane ticket causing officials to believe that she was buying his positive testimony.

The man has now been allowed to travel to the UK where he will assess the situation. He said, "There has been a change of mind by my government minister. I am expected to spend two weeks."

He said the whole thing was a misunderstanding that has been resolved.

His testimony is crucial on whether or not Madge will get final adoption of little David. She will.

Yeah, the misunderstanding being the amount of zeros on the check. Why even bother. David is living the life.

Source: People

42 comments

African Orphans • Madonna

Tuesday, August 14th 2007

If It's Not A Break-Up Rumor, It's A Baby Rumor

The Daily Mail reports that Angelina Jolie will travel to Ethiopia to buy another baby. They claim she will go there in 3-months and pick out a new baby in hopes that it will patch up her relatinoship with Brad Pitt as well as making Zahara feel more at home in their family. This would be Angelina's 4th adopted baby.

A source said, "Angie in particular feels very strongly that while Shiloh will grow up seeing the family resemblance between herself and her natural parents, and Maddox and Pax will feel a connection through their birthplaces, Zahara has no such close-knit bond.

"They hope that by finding an Ethiopian brother or sister - preferably sister - for her, it will help Zahara feel more comfortable and happy in her own skin."

A few months ago there were rumors that Angelina was going to get another baby from Asia and that never happened, so I'm sure this is just a rumor.

In reading this article I also learned that Angie has a tattoo with the map co-ordinates of the country of each of her adopted children.

Click here to see it.

By the time she's 40, that shit is going to be hitting her wrist.

214 comments

African Orphans • Brangelina • Buying Children

Monday, August 6th 2007

Is The Party Over?

Penstone Kilembe was the child expert from Malawi assigned to review Madonna's adoption of David Banda. The Daily Mail reports that he has now been banned from reviewing the case, because the Child Welfare Board feels that he's become too close to Madonna after she paid for his plane ticket from Africa to London.

The Minister told the Malawi News, "We have already contacted Madonna that someone else and not Kilembe will come to assess her, because we feel Mr Kilembe personalised the whole issue when other people can go."

Penstone said that this decision may result in David being sent back to his village in Africa.

He said, "What this means is that the whole adoption process may crumble and David is sent back to his village."

Penstone's testimony at the final hearing for Madonna and David Banda was going to be crucial to the case. The Minister feels that with Madonna funding Penstone's trip it looks like she's trying to "buy" a favorable review.

Lame. Just let the kid stay with her. I'm sure sitting in a multi-million dollar London mansion is much more comfortable than sitting on a mat in the middle of the African desert with mosquitos buzzing around your ass.

Madonna is a dumbass for paying for the dude's ticket in the first place. It does look like she's buying his ass, but at this point who cares. Why is it that adopting a kid is so damn hard? Just ask the damn kid!

78 comments

African Orphans • Madonna

Monday, April 23rd 2007

Madge Leaves Malawi, Doesn't Purchase

Madge, Lourdes and David left Malawi this weekend without a new purchase. It was rumored that she was going to adopt a little girl named Grace, but so far that hasn't happened. She also left Africa without meeting with David's bio-daddy.

The orphanage had organized a meeting between David's daddy and Madonna, but it was cancelled by Madge's camp. A source at the orphanage said that he waited around, but they never showed.

Madonna and company were in Africa for her "Raising Malawai" foundation to build a children's health center.

In her defense, she doesn't owe David's daddy anything. He gave up his child and she's now his mother. I'm sure his daddy will cry to the press on how difficult Madonna is. He needs to recognize.

Source: People

25 comments

African Orphans • Madonna