OctoMommy isn't going to be homeless anytime soon! So those of you who are related to her in any way can plug your phone back in take the "We've Moved To Tanzania" sign off your front door. Actually, if you're related to her, you should probably move to Tanzania any way, just in case.
OctoMom and her child army were in danger of being kicked out of their Den of Dirty Diapers and Delusion, because she failed to make a lump sum payment of $450,000 to the owner of the house. The owner of the house threatened to begin foreclosure proceedings if the money didn't land between his luscious cleavage by last Tuesday.
Well, Tuesday came and gone and OctoCrazy is still living in the house. TMZ says that the owner of the house has held off on putting Octo on the curb, because he has come to an agreement with her dad. Octo will continue to make monthly payments on the house while looking for a new loan. She promises to make the balloon payment of $450,000 once she secures a loan.
When Octo took her plight for cash to the ho stroll, both Vivid Entertainment and Peta offered to come to her rescue for a price. Vivid once again offered her $1 million if she spread her octopussay and took a load of baby batter to the titties in a porn movie. Thankfully, God can hold off pressing the eject button, because she turned the deal down. However, Octo did accept Peta's offer.
CNN says that Peta will pay Octo $5,000 a month to put a sign on her front yard advocating for hos to spay or neuter their pets. Peta will also provide her family with a lifetime supply of veggie burgers and dogs.
The only way this can get more psychotic is if Heather Mills was the one providing the veggie dogs. Heather Mills, Peta and OctoCrazy joining forces really does have all the makings of a terrifying horror movie. Eli Roth, get your typewriter out!
And does this mean OctoCrazy is finally going to be spayed while Bob Barker looks on with an approving look on his face?
Vh1 cold sore Daisy de la Hoya, star of Rock of Love and Daisy of Love, tells Radar that she was dating Corey Haim at the time of her death. Daisy says that the two were set up a little over a month ago by Corey Feldman.
Daisy says, "We just connected straight away, we had an automatic connection. I recognized that he was a lost soul, we had the same behavior patterns, we had a lot in common.
It's such a tragedy, he was so talented and had so much to offer. He was a sweet, caring, respectful person who just wanted to be loved. Corey was looking forward to the future, he was making plans. He had a movie coming up and he was talking about directing, I can't believe he would of done this on purpose, it had to be an accident."
"I'm sooooooo devastated right now. This is the worst day ever I can't believe this."
"Why do I always fall for the lost soul? We could of been lost together, now your lost forever.... Ill miss you."
Now I'm not saying that Daisy is riding shot gun on the milk train. I'm also not saying that she's drying her tears with a make-up puff so she's ready for her close-up when The Insider comes a knockin'. And I'm not even saying that she's going to mend her broken heart by getting new silicone implants so she's extra chichilicious for her "I'm So Sad" cover of Penthouse Magazine. I'm not saying any of that! Okay, yes I am.
For her 30th birthday last year, Jennifer Love Hewitt wet farted all over Audrey Hepburn's good memory by dressing up as a special needs Holly Golightly and posing for the paps in front of Tiffany's. Audrey hasn't stopped pirouetting in her grave since then.
Well, for her 31st birthday this year, JLove finally left Audrey alone. Instead, JLove slipped on a pair of cankle warmers, threw one of Lady CaCa's parched pubic bows on her head and posed for the paparazzi outside of her house.
You know, I'm going to leave this one alone, because if she wants to dress up like a thirsty anus for her birthday...LET HER! Although, next year she should just go all the way and dress up as an actual thirsty anus. Correct: a bedazzled thirsty anus.
Everything about these pictures scream: LAST CALL! But really, it's nothing new. During every fashion week from here to Bakersfield, the free clinic messiah rises from a puddle of 100 proof vomit and closes Richie Rich's fashion show. Because nothing makes people run for the exit like Pamela Anderson's vag. Seriously, Pamela should rent our her services. When you've got a party guest (aka one of your cousins) who just can't take a hint, bring Pamela's vag out and he'll scatter faster than a hooker running from the po po's siren.
Here's more of Pammy looking like the janitor just woke her up with his broom. Terrell Owens also walked during the show last night, and we're going to need a few mammalogists to tell us what kind of creature is on his head.
Since Jon Grosselin dumped Hailey "Meth Brows" Glassman back onto the potted plant he found her on, she has to do something to keep her name on people's RSS feeds. So that's why she hosted a girl-on-girl boxing match at the Philadelphia Airport Ramada Hotel last night. Jamie Jungers was the organizer's first choice, but she was already booked for the opening of a Super 8 in Barstow.
Meth Brows really dressed up for the occasion as you can see. It's like every reality shit show formed a circle jerk around her and ejaculated massive amounts of vomit on her at once. The bandanna is from Rock of Love, the "mauled by a possum" shirt is from Jersey Shore, the boots were made from Kim Zolciak's leftover wigs, and the rest can be found in the closets of any low-budget bitch on a Vh1 or MTV reality show.
This entire ho-semble is one gigantic weapon of mass destruction. Nowhere is safe. It makes you want to close the casket door and go to sleep!
While some of the members of the Jackson family were attending the This Is It premiere in Los Angeles, their pimp master Joe Jackson was honoring his son's memory by showing up to the Las Vegas premiere with two Craigslist pussy peddlers at his side. Did you really think Joe Jackson would skip out on an promotional opportunity like this?! Of course not.
And when is somebody going to take a Magic Eraser to his stache. Seriously, it looks like Toby struck again!
Eddie Cibrian and LeAnn Rimes proudly pranced out of the always private Katsuya restaurant in West Hollywod last night looking happier than two famewhores in a sea of paps. Both of them looking pretty smug, but I'd have the same look on my face if I was bouncing on Eddie Cibrian, Sure, the dude is an asshole of epic proportions, but he could slap a baby bunny and you'd still spin on that shit.
And I think it's time that Renee Zellweger hand down the title of "Squinty" to LeAnn, because bitch always looks constipated in the eyes. Pass the fart, and open your eyes, HO!