Justin Timberlake

Brit Brit and Justin Timberlake will record a duet for her next album. OK! Magazine sweeeaaars this is true. They pinky swear it!

Brit Brit's album is coming out sometime next year. A source said, "Britney is spending her summer in the recording studio, working on a brand new album. She's working with a team of top-notch producers and songwriters and we're very excited about what she's accomplished so far."

I'll believe it when I hear Brit Brit's Cheeto warble and Justin's gay baby whining together in one song. Even then, I won't believe it! Knowing Brit Brit, she'll just sing along to one of Justin's tracks. Justin TimberLAME is too busy licking his own boypuss to record a song with Brit.

In Justin's delusional mind, he should only duet with the likes of Kathleen Battle and shit.

Brit Brit has already shot some crazy elevator scene for Vadge's upcoming "Dry & Sour" tour, but she may also perform during a couple of shows. Vadge is desperate (being the key word) to get Brit Brit onstage with Justin Timberlake. Justin worked on Vadge's "Hard Candy" album.

A source told The Sun, “Madonna is always trying to raise the bar and Britney and Timberlake on the same stage would be perfect. They have both been asked but I think both are a bit reluctant. Britney would find it all a bit emotional and JT might not fancy it. More likely is that they both appear on different dates. But if anyone can make this happen it’s Madonna.”

Like Douchebag Timberlake is really going to agree to this shit. Bitch thinks his pussy doesn't stink.

This will only work if Brit Brit and Justin wear those sexy outfits in the picture of. Vadge can wear a matching one too, but hers will probably look more like this.

Then they can all sing "Sidewalk Talk" together. Seriously, WTF happened to Sidewalk Talk?! That is the greatest Vadge song of all-time! Even Martika agrees and she knows everything. Clip below:

Or is it 2 dudes, 1 dog? Or 3 dogs? Any of those work.

Justin Timberlake looks so happy he could queef. He always has bitch face. Jessica Biel should use a bigger strap-on his ass so he would loosen up some more.

And who the hell did that to Jessica's hair?! It reminds me of when my mommy gave my sister a haircut when we were little. My mommy took the kitchen scissors in one hand and my sister's bangs in the other hand and chopped them in one swoop. It left my sister with asymmetrical bangs that were too short! That poor bitch looked like an Emo gayelle.

Maybe my mommy is moonlighting as Jessica Biel's bang-cutter. Bang-cutter. That sounds really gross and inappropriate.

Justin Timberlake told Collider.com that he suffers from both OCD and ADD. Yes, the tampon is still blabbing. Justin said, "I have OCD mixed with ADD. You try living with that. It's complicated."

In Justin's case, OCD stands for "Oogly Cuntry Douche." Seriously, I think ALL celebrities have OCD because they are all obsessed with themselves.

Here's Justin with some poopey-stained boots in Paris this morning.

Becks, slowly step away from the douche. You do not want to be contaminated! Hopefully, Becks went home and bathed in period water. I know it's gross, but that's the only way to combat douche.

You can tell Becks has no idea what Justin Timberlake is saying. When Justin starts talking everybody but him only hears "douche douche douche." Becks is politely smiling and trying to figure out what the hell is coming out of d-bag's mouth.

Here's Becks with Justin at the Lakers-Celtics game last night.

Madonna performed a 32-minute set at NYC's Roseland last night for free! Well, it wasn't totally free, because some people waited over 60 hours to get in. WTF! I wouldn't even wait 60 hours in line to see a Pete Doherty and Amy Wino crack-off! Ok, I totally would.

Anyway, during her set, Madge told the audience, “All you people I saw sleeping in the street last night, this song is for you.” She went on to say, "And don't forget to waste your hard earned cash on all my products, because I really need to buy a 4th home in London. CHEERIO!" Ok, she didn't say the last part.

Madge was joined on stage by Douche Timberlake and two tampons bumped vaginas to that hideous song of theirs. Seriously, can that song be put down already?

At least Madge kept her hands and crotch covered. That's all that I ask. Yes, it looks like her performance had its fair share of memaw crotch thrusts, but that's ok. Madonna is the new Sally O'Malley. She's 50 (almost)!!!!

Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake are still two dykes in love. The two attended some wedding in Los Angeles last night and came out hand-in-hand. You know she-hulk's grip is killing Justin inside. She doesn't know her own strength. He wants to cry so badly, but he's keeping it together for the cameras. Justin is used to it. Biel probably works that strap-on like a champ. Even cokie on Justin's hole can't ease the pain. The bitch is a trooper.

Tobey Maguire, Jason Bateman, Scott Speedman and Eva Mendes also attended last night. This shit looked like a funeral! They were all wearing black. It makes sense. You're mourning the bride and groom's slut days. Sad.

This is the new Justin Timberlake featuring Madonna (well...it is) video and I lasted the entire 4 minutes! Woo hoo! I will award myself by not listening to this song ever again. I had to watch the video with the sound turned to zero, because it reminds me of the time my high school marching band tried to do 2Pac's "California Love." Ugly memories.

The sun itself must have lit this video, because Madonna is wrinkle-free everywhere. Madge also wants to make sure we know that her thrusting 50-year-old crotch is here to stay. Basically, Madonna is turning into Sally O'Malley minus the sex appeal.

It took them 30 seconds to find two separate stock photos of Madge and Justin Timberdouche. It took them another 30 to paste them together. It took a full minute to find the font. The rest of the two minutes was spent airbrushing Madge's face. It probably cost the label a whopping buck fifty. Budget cover.

Madge and Justin need to do an ass-to-ass video already. They are obsessed with each other. I can't wait till she moves to a proper collaborator like Charo.

Source

Madge was induced into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame last night in NYC and it was a night full of laughs. Douche extraordinare Justin Timberlake introduced the Vadge one and used this time to make a joke about Brit Brit Spears.

He said, "The world has always been full of Madonna wannabes and I might have even dated a couple." Is Jay Leno writing his jokes?

He went on to say, "She has still found time to kiss someone I may or may not have publicly kissed myself while I was in the audience. Of course you know I was talking about Sean Penn." Leno is totally writing his jokes.

When Madge finally accepted her award she called the audience "motherfuckers" and talked about her past drug use. She's so hardcore rock and roll. She said she split a tab of ecstasy with an A&R exec Michael Rosenblatt after she gave him her demo tape. She also talked about smoking joints in front of her publicist, Liz Rosenberg, back in the day.

Madge didn't perform, but Iggy Pop performed "Burning Up" and "Ray of Light." Iggy has to be at least 150 years old and he's still hot as hell. This is Matthew McConaughey in 20 years, because Iggy never wears a fucking shirt. He has like heroin muscles.

Madge's face is frozen in time. I think she had a battle with botox and lost. I also see a little hair on her chinny chin chin. Madge, stop with the lifting and botox and get your shit waxed! Her eyebrows will be touching her hairline in no time.

The outfit is horrendous, but I'm too busy trying to figure out what's going on with her face and hair! She looks like a Batman character.

Congrats to Madge! Again, lay off the botox and pick up a joint like in the old days.