Hot Slut of the Month

Please take a quick second from sneaking vodka and computer clean shots underneath your desk (in celebration of the theme of the day) to vote for October's Hot Slut of the Month. Make sure to take a few extra shots before voting, because you're going to need a clear head.

And it's voting day for some of us, so your finger should already be used to it. Your choices this month are:

Tenobaila: The premiere ass shaker of YouTube and your mom's greatest hero
Frankie Lons: Former (?) crackhead jailbird turned reality show superstar
Derek J: Swish samurai and expert high-heel strutter
Abuelita Hot Chocolate: Don't even ask or you'll get slapped in your teefs
Deidra Daley Everett: BBW internet supermodel

Voting is in the sidebar to the right as usual. The winning slut will be revealed in a lavish ceremony (not really) on Thursday. Happy Votin' & Boozin' Day!

The power of the ginge cannot be stopped! Grace Coddington is Dlisted's Miss September and will go on to the Miss Hot Slut of the Year competition in January. Grace will battle it out against Vogue Evolution, Maru, Quween on the Scene, Kate Gosselin's Possum Hair, Susan Boyle, Uggs, Claire Cannucciari, and STAINS!

Participation in the talent competition is mandatory, so Grace better work on her shank eye and elegant scowl.

Thanks to all hos who voted!

Please take a moment from sending in these sessy pictures of Mah Boo giving us an "I CAN TAKE IT" face while making his biceps more bicep-ier to vote for September's Hot Slut of the Month!

This time, we have an international group of lovely hot sluts for you to pick from. Your choices are:

Miyuki Hatoyama: The First Lady of Japan, Tommy Girl's soulmate (in a past life), UFO passenger and a permanent resident of Crazytown.

Grace Coddington: Creative Director of Vogue and the hottest thorn in Anna Wintour's side.

Tania Mcintosh: The UK's premiere serial celebwhore hugger!

Brynne Gordon: The pride of Australia (and California).

Voting is in the sidebar to the right. The winning slut will be announced Thursday. Happeh voting!

The people have spoken and voted Vogue Evolution as the hottest and sluttiest sluts of August! VE snatched up 41% of the votes. This couldn't have come at a better time, because (SPOILER ALERT) their asses were eliminated from America's Best Dance Crew this week. The producers were probably sick of the janitors always bitching about having to clean up Vogue Evolution's glitter off the dancefloor, so they got rid of them. Sadness. But Vogue Evolution is heading straight for the stars, so they don't need that shit. And at least they won't have to see Lil' Mama's crypt-keeper face anymore.

Below is Vogue Evolution's "Halle Berry" dance from this week's episode. You know Lil' Mama's dick probably jumped several times during their performance.

Thanks to all who voted!

Please take time out from perfecting your recipe for an O-Positive-tini for the True Blood finale this weekend to vote for August's Hot Slut of the Month. Now, there's no cat or dog (that we know of 100%) to choose from, so it's anybody's game. Your choices are:

Lesley Anne-Down - Glamorous soap opera star who bathes in diamonds and pearls!
Sandra Rinomato - Real estate mogul, HGTV star and expert side-eye giver!
Johanna Tukiainen - The pride of Finland!
Vogue Evolution - The glittery gays (and tranny) of MTV's America's Best Dance Crew!
Tameka "Tiny" Cottle - The Travelocity gnome version of Mariah Carey and creator of her own language!

The winning slut will be announced Friday. Voting is in the sidebar to your right. Put a condom on your fingers and vote away!

Well, the others didn't stand a chance. I thought Sandra Lee would booze her way to victory, but Maru stuffed all those sluts in a box and took the crown (made out of Mother's Circus Animal Cookies) with 66% of the votes!

Maru will now face off with STAINS, Clara Cannacciari, Uggs, Susan Boyle, Kate Gosselin's possum hair, Quween on the Scene and 5 others for the title of all titles: Hot Slut of the 2009! Yeah, we have 4 animals (including Kate's possum friend) in the finals. Just call this shit FurListed. Thanks to all who voted!

It's that time of the month! No, not THAT time of the month. Although, voting for this shit is kind of like getting your menstrual cycle. Don't make me list the similarities. Anyway, please take a moment from devouring your free lava cake AND TACOS to cast your vote for Miss Hot Slut of July! This time around, we have a former drunk, someone who always has drunk face, a current drunk and a pussy who acts drunk. Here are your finalists:

Jane Velez-Mitchell - Gayelle news anchor and lady mullet fan
Miko Brando - Son of Marlon, MJ's former bodyguard/bff and Hawaiian shirt fetishist
Sandra Lee - Grocery store shopper, cocktail guzzler and tablescape artist
Maru - Internet star, box lover and catrobat

Voting is in the sidebar to the right. The winning slut will be crowned on Thursday!

Quween of the Scene chopped down the competition and won the title of Hot Slut of the Month! Strawberry Hill was on her ass in a major way, but Quween managed to beat that bitch. That's kind of ironic since you know Strawberry Hill is Quween's nectar of choice (and mine too!).

Above is Quween toasting her victory with our very own Hot Babe of 2007, Mama Chicken Cutlets and Henry.

Thanks to all who voted!

Image: Wenn.com

It's that important time to pick the sixth Hot Slut of the Month (Yeah, time flies when you're binging and bonging) who will compete for Miss Hot Slut of 2009! June is officially "Potty Training Awareness" month, so let that little tidbit help you with your choice. Your choices are:

Danielle Staub - The prostitution whore with glorious eyebrows from The Real Housewives of NJ
Quween on the Scene - "Pos-a-rassi" fighter and friend to all
Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill - An important part of everyone's teen years
Orit Fux - The elegant jewel of Israel
Jane Velez-Mitchell - Gayelle news shouter

Voting is in the sidebar to the right. Vote with your life...as always. The winner will be announced on Thursday!

The people have spoken and named Kate Gosselin's fried beaver hair as the current Hot Slut of the Month! Kate's dykey 'do will represent the month of May at the Hot Sloooot of the Year pageant in January. It will be asked about its stance on gay marriage, so it better be ready.

Thanks to all of you who took time out from touching your private places to vote!

Here's some pictures of our reigning HSOTM on top of that lady's head in North Carolina yesterday. I think that lady is trying to steal that baby friend. She's got problems.