Gay

Even Gayken's turkey baster baby is saying, "DUH!" Gayken officially came screaming out of the closet on the cover of People Magazine. Do you hear that? It's the sound of thousands of middle-aged conservative Claymates tearing down their Gayken shrines. Hahaha! We told you, dumb bitches!

VIA Huffington Post

Gus Van Zant directed James Franco in that new "Milk" movie and he also interviewed him for Interview Magazine (via Radar Online). During their conversation, cover girl Zac Efron's name came up. Gus offered him the small role of "pizza guy" in "Milk." And by "pizza guy" he means "Pass Around Pam." Anygay, James talks about how he met Zac at the VMAS. I bet you James had a boner while he was telling the story.

JF: So then when I saw him at the MTV Movie Awards, I was like, "Hey man Good to meet you, Zac. I really like the movie, and I just worked with Gus, and he tried to get you in the movie." And Zac was like, "Yeah, yeah. It just didn't work out." And I was like, "Well you should really do a movie with Gus. I think it would be a good contrast to your other stuff." He's like, "Yeah, maybe." And then I was walking away to go back to my seat, and he tapped me on the shoulder and said, "We should do it together, man." And he, like, gave me a high five. He was really the nicest guy.

GVS: Yeah. He is really nice. We should all do a Judd Apatow movie. You and Zac and me.

JF: Yeah. You should do a movie that Judd produces, and we'll do it with Zac. What do you think?

GVS: Keep your eyes open for it.

JF: What kind of movie do you think it could be?

GVS: I'll have to think about that one.

JF: IF you have an idea and it's like me and Zac playing basketball or delivering pizzas or whatever, I'm in.

They totally want to lick each other's peens. I mean, they high-fived! They might as well have sucked each other's assholes right there in front of everyone. I would've been okay with this as long as they taped it and then immediately uploaded it to the internet.

James and Zac as basketball playing pizza delivery guys? Um....two words immediately come to mind: GAY PORN. Since Judd Apatow is involved, here's a few titles they can choose from:

Step Brothers Who Do Each Other
The 40 Year Old Butt Virgin
Peen In Asshole Express

VIA Gawker

Maddox's daddy has donated 1 Brangelina dollar to fight the gay marriage ban in California. Oh, 1 Brangelina dollar is 100,000 American dollars. The LA Times reports, that Brad announced he is giving up $100,000 from his own checking account to fight California's Proposition 8, a November ballot measure that would eliminate same-sex couples' right to get married.

Brad said: "Because no one has the right to deny another their life, even though they disagree with it, because everyone has the right to live the life they so desire if it doesn't harm another and because discrimination has no place in America, my vote will be for equality and against Proposition 8."

So far, Brad's $100,000 donation is the largest to the NO ON PROP 8 campaign by an A-list celebrity. Come on, Tommy Girl! Step it up! And by "step it up" I don't mean get higher lifts.

If Prop 8 passes, that means Ellen and Portia's beautiful gayelle married bliss would be null and void. Don't make the gayelles sad. The world stops turning when lesbians cry.

71-year-old George Takei married his 54-year-old partner Brad Altman in Los Angeles yesterday evening. The two oldies have been together for 21 years. If you still want to look at the same pair of saggy prune sacks after 21 years, then it must be true love.

200 of George and Brad's (like Clooney & Pitt) friends and family helped celebrate their new union. George's "Star Trek" co-stars, Nichelle Nichols and Walter Koenig, served as maid of sexy and best man. Nichelle told People, "I was fighting back the tears. But they came oozing out anyway. I'm so happy that they're both able to legally proclaim their commitment to one another after spending the past 21 years together." I want a gay wedding just so Nichelle Nichols can show up and "ooze" tears.

Before making it legal, George said to reporters in his cashmere-on-velvet voice, "Live long and prosper!"

He never gets sick of saying that, does he? Maybe he can't even help it. He's said it so many times in his lifetime that it's etched in his brain and won't wash away. He probably says it like 300 times a day. It's the first thing he says in the morning and the last thing he says at night. His new husband has learned to drown that shit out.

I shouldn't joke. That's going to be me in a few years. My stupid lingo is going to stick with me until my dying days and I won't be able to help it. In 50 years, when I'm sitting in the retirement home with a hot cup of Ensure next to me, I'm going randomly blab about "memaws, chicken cutlets, lucite and no-no holes." If this happens, just pass me the bowl of Werther's Originals and ignore me for the rest of the day.

Anyoldgay, congrats to these two pepaws! May the rest of their days be filled with love, Metamucil, Icy Hot and caramel squares! Wait, do you think that pepaw gays use Icy Hot instead of lube? I mean, it kills two birds with one stone....so to speak.

The city of Hollywood got an extra shot of homo faaaaaabulousness yesterday when the Village People received their star on the Walk of Fame. That star looks so bland. It should be extra sparkly or something. This is the Village People we're talking about!

Some of the original members of the Village People weren't even there which totally sucks. The original cop, Victor Willis, managed to show up. He watched the ceremony from the sidewalk. He also wore a cop costume that was probably found in the "last chance bin" in the Halloween section at KMart. A couple of LAPD officers had to check Victor's fake gun to make sure it wasn't real. That fucking makes me sad. Victor shouldn't be standing on the sidewalk in a paltry cop uniform. He should up there with the rest of those ripe fruits. Life isn't fair.

Charo was also on hand to congratulate the dudes. I'd like to think that Charo accidentially walked in on the ceremony. In my head, Charo spends her Fridays afternoon, strolling through Hollywood, coochie-cooing for all the tourists. She's so fucking hot.

I'm not really sure what's going on in these pictures. All I know is that there's a dude's bare ass in Kevin Spacey's face and he's looking at it like....well...like there's a raw ass in front of his face. And I doubt his eyes are sparkling from the camera's flash. His eyes are really twinkling, because he's so giddy with excitement that he has an all-you-can-eat salad bar right in front of his mouth! You think the guy's ass is a little red now? Imagine the way it looked after Spacey was finished with it.

Here's more of Kevin Spacey coveting a dude's nalgas in Croatia. I also threw in some pictures of him smoking something good with some trick.

What in Clay Gayken hell is this shit all about?! Ricky Martin's publicist has confirmed that he's the father of twin boys! This came out of nowhere!

Ricky's new babies were born a few weeks ago with a little help from a surrogate mother and a turkey baster. You know Gayken is sitting somewhere, rocking his new baby, rolling his eyes and saying, "Girl, please! Don't try it!"

Ricky's spokeswhore issued this statement: "The children, delivered via gestational surrogacy, are healthy and already under Ricky's full-time care. Ricky is elated to begin this new chapter in his life as a parent and will be spending the remainder of the year out of the public spotlight in order to spend time with his children."

Um...hasn't he been out of the public spotlight for at least 5 years? Seriously, babies are just popping out left and right! This is obviously the thing to do. Maybe I should get one of those baby things? Naw. I don't like baby vomit in my martinis.

Congrats to Ricky! I can't wait to hear what he named them. If he didn't name one of them "Escandalo," I'm going to slap him with a rubber vagina. And you know that shit would gross him out.

Source

Thanks Ali

This is exactly what your genitals need this morning. Make sure you put a fresh baby wipe over them before watching this video. They will either cry milky tears or barf up yesterday's meal. And you know exactly what I mean by "yesterday's meal." You filthy whore!

Matt Lauer and Al Roker have once again proven why they get paid the big bucks for their work on "Today." This morning they performed a male tandem rhythmic gymnastics routine to Gary Wright's "Dream Weaver." Male tandem gymnastics sounds like what I did last night. I just wish I had some Gary Wright playing in the background.

They should perform this shit at the Closing Ceremony.

P.S. - After seeing Al Roker in spandex, I can never look at a peanut the same way again.

When I first saw these pictures of Covergirl Zac Efron and Gossip Girl Chace Crawford, I immediately asked, "Who's the top and who's the bottom?" That's a dumb dumb question, because obviously they're both bossy bottoms. They're both probably thinking, "What the hell am I going to do with this bitch?" Well, their ass lips can kiss and they can lick each other's chodes, but that's about it. Or they can just do each other's hair. Yeah, these two don't belong together. It would only end in a cat fight and Zac getting his make-up smeared. That wouldn't be nice.

And is that chest hair I see on Chace?! I didn't even know that was possible. That's probably a weave. A chest merkin.

Here's more of Zac, Chace and something called a Vanessa Hudgens at the Teen Choice Awards last night.

You know that dude in the back is totally saying, "Gurrrrl. Look at that flamer over there. My tranny poodle wouldn't even rock those pants. I can smell his ass jam from here. Anyway, fuck this dyke. Let's go see Mamma Mia again." Those dudes are totally mistaken! Ed Westwick is not a homo! Yes, there's been rumors that he's totally boning Chace Crawford, but it's a falsity! He was spotted the other night making out with a chick! That proves everything!

Some witness-type saw Ed at Lit in NYC on Wednesday night with his tongue down some random chick's throat. The witness said, "When the two left together, Ed was leading her by the hand. He was moving quick, but he had time to wink at a hot brunette before slipping out."

There! We can finally shut the closet door on those homo rumors.

Here's Ed wearing totally straight dude pants on the set of "Gossip Girl" the other day. I'm not being sarcastic either. Only pimps and mafia bosses wear pants like that.