Mariah Carey

Apparently, MTV's TRL is still on, but not for long. MTV has cut off that bitch after 10 years. The executive producer of TRL said the show's final episode will be a 2-hour special airing on a Saturday afternoon in November. He went on to say that TRL isn't ending for good, but they felt it was the right time to give it a break.

That makes sense. I mean, TRL does show music videos and MTV obviously doesn't care about those anymore, so it no longer fits in. I'm sure they will replace TRL with some badly-acted faux reality show.

TRL should have shut their doors in 2001 after Mimi's epic ice cream meltdown (clip above). Seriously, they would have ended on a high note. HIGH being the key word. I never understood the point of TRL until I watched Mimi go crazy on it. That's when I realized that the only TRL was born was to give us that moment. And for that, I thank TRL.

Mimi has dumped Benny Medina as her manager and will now represent herself!!

She issued this statement to E! News: "Benny Medina and I will continue to work together on projects both present and in the future. I'm looking forward to working with Benny on what we have been developing, and to his continued involvement in my creative life."

Blah...blah...who cares about all that? All I care about is the fact that Mimi is her own manager now! This is only good news for us. I'm sure Benny was a party pooper who axed all of Mimi's grand ideas!

Now when Mimi decides she wants to do an album of lullabies dedicated to Hello Kitty, there won't be anybody to stand in her way! Or when she gets the brilliant idea to model her new look after all the characters from Strawberry Shortcake, Benny won't be there to poo-poo on her rainbow parade.

Finally, Mimi can make all of her fucked-up butterfly fantasies come true! This news has made me so happy. To quote Allison from Intervention: "It's like I'm walkeeeeen on sunshine!"

If Mimi took off those enormous fucking glasses she could probably walk her own unicornie-loving-ass to the car instead of having her man-toy guide the way. He's always holding on to Hello Kitty's #1 fan like she's going to blow away! Although, Nick Cannon is one smart bitch to keep a tight grip on her. When you find a big bag of money, you should never let it out of your sight. Do you hear that, Sarah Larson? I mean, if Jack in "Titanic" was rich as fuck, Rose would have never let go of his hand. Never.

Here's Nick and the rainbow princess out in NYC last night.

Does anybody here speak butterfly-talk? Can you please let this bitch know to stop buying her clothes in the juniors department at Kohl's. Mimi has a closet the size of fucking Greenland and this is the kind of shit she pulls out of it? Shit, she probably wore this same outfit when she was 12. Looking like a prostitot from the Reagan era is not cute.

Here's the ever-delusional Mimi outside of MTV studios in NYC today.

First of all, that dude in between Mimi and Nick is in deep prayer. He's asking God, "Please God, help me remember to address her as 'her butterfly highness' or it's back to working security at Rite-Aid."

Nick Cannon kept his bank account close as he left Mr. Chow last night. You know he uses Mighty Putty to keep her hand bonded to his. He's smart. Don't let that money of out of your sight!

Wait, is that bitch wearing pasties underneath her skin-tight dress? I hope they are shaped like Hello Kitty, unicorns or Mickey Mouse.

I'm also surprised that Mimi and Nick are still married. It's almost been 3-months! That's impressive. If they make it to one full year, I swear I'll give up dick for an hour.

Here's the butterfly tramp and her child bride at Mr. Chow last night. A broken Cristiano Ronaldo was also there. Those are the ugliest crutches ever. He could have taken time out from waxing his eyebrows to bedazzle that shit or something.

We've got two Photoshop Award winners (see below) today! Although, Mimi should really be given some sort of Photoshop lifetime achievement honor. She probably doesn't even know what she really looks like. At this point, they totally Photoshop her already Photoshopped pictures.

Something in the milk ain't clean about this Elle cover. Mimi looks like she's about to push her own head off of the body that clearly doesn't belong to her. The rest of the spread is no suprise. Mimi is in a bikini! Seriously, bitch needs to join the cast of the next Surivor. That way she can frolick the beach half-nekkid without any judgement.

Visit Mariah Daily to see more pictures of a majorly Photoshopped Mimi

Mimi once again shows off her greasy hamhocks in her new video, "I'll Be Lovin' U Long Time." Love you long time! Yes Mimi, we know. You enjoy oiling yourself up and rolling around like a horny pussycat on a hot summer's day. Somebody calm her ass down with a q-tip! Seriously, have you ever heard about the many ways to soothe a pussy in heat? I tried the q-tip method on myself, but it didn't really work and I'm still looking for that q-tip......

Source

Shit, now I have to return the 5-foot tall lucite butterfly statute I bought for Mimi and Nick. The two have called off their second wedding which was supposed to take place in NYC sometime this month. Their first wedding in the Bahamas just wasn't enough for Mimi. The second wedding was going to be a multi-million-dollar crystal unicorn extravaganza fit for an 8-year-old!

Mimi reportedly couldn't find a magazine that was interested in spending millions for the exclusive photos of her cotton candy bukkake fiesta. A told MSNBC's The Scoop, “Mariah was willing to pay for the wedding, but the way she hoped to pay for the wedding was through the sale of photos. No one was interested."

Did the bitch try Hello Kitty Magazine?! They would have paid for the entire affair and also given her a custom-made wedding dress made of out of hundreds of stuffed Hello Kitties. Hello Kitty herself could have officiated the ceremony! Ugh. She can hit them up for her next marriage.

Brit & KFed 2.0 landed in Japan today and Mimi proudly showed off her wedding ring. The wedding ring she probably bought for herself! Nick is a smart dude though. He's holding on to Mimi for dear life. Shit, he would be stupid to let go of his money. He should put a baby leash on her ass.

It was rumored that Mimi was planning a massive $4 million second wedding in NYC next month. Mimi laughed off the rumors by saying, "4 milly? On what? Cake?" Well, yeah. I'm sure a fairytale wedding cake covered in crystal butterflies and unicorns doesn't come cheap.

You know, Mimi's delusional ass looks happy and that's all that matters. Ignorance is bliss!

One wedding is not enough for Mimi! MSNBC's The Scoop reports that Mimi is planning an over-the-top wedding to Nick Cannon in NYC. They are going to be divorced in a few months, so she might as well get a tacky party out of this marriage while she still can!

A source said, “It’s going to be held in New York City in the next six weeks. Picture a wedding on the scale of Liza Minnelli’s (to David Gest) and you’ll be on the right track." Liza Minnelli's wedding?! You mean the night is going to end with the groom groping one of the waiters and the bride having a slumber party with all of her gay best friends?

The source went on to say, “She wants over 2,000 guests and the budget will be well over $4 million and she’ll have at least 14 bridesmaids."

YES! Now this is what I'm talking about. Expect this shit to be like My Super Sweet 16 on CRACK. Those little dumb bitches don't have shit on Mimi. Mimi better be careful about who she uses as wedding planner. Most people don't understand her. She should really hire a group of 8-year-old girls as her wedding team. They know what Mimi likes, because it's probably what they like too.