Animal Stories

The Humane Society of the United States is claiming that Macy's is currently selling a fur trim Sean John parka which they say is made with fake rabbit fur, but the label says real racoon dog fur. Yes, DOG FUR. Apparently, the coats are being sent out for testing and if they come back positive for woof woof coat then Macy's will pull them off the shelves and give the hair to needy dogs with cancer. Ok, not that last part.

The $237.99 coat was made in China and I guess ching chong chinamen use raccoon dog fur a lot, because it easily passes as raccoon fur.

Hey, Macy's isn't lying. They said the fur was "fake rabbit fur" which is true if they are using dog fur. Poor raccoon dog! They don't want to spend the rest of their afterlife days clung to a cheap polyester shell worn by wannabe ballers!

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New York Dog Magazine and Hollywood Dog Magazine conducted an online poll for the best and worst dog owners of 2006. Britney Spears won by a landslide. Brit Brit used to have a chihuahua she named Bit Bit, but BB hasn't been seen in a while.

Hilary O'Hagan of NY Dog Mag said, "She once had three Chihuahuas … and never left home without at least one of them on her arm As soon as she met K-Fed and had kids they (the dogs) disappeared."

Last year's big loser, Paris Hilton, fell to second place. If you ask me she should've been first. I mean Baby Luv anyone? You know Baby Luv is now a throw over her chaise lounge.

On the other side of the coin, Oprah Winfrey was voted best dog owner beating Tori Spelling and Nicollette Sheridan. Um...shouldn't Oprah's servants be voted best dog owneres? They are the real ones taking care of those mutts!

And correction..Tori Spelling's husband should've been in the running for best dog owner.

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Why is Barbie's scoop poop dog eating its own caca? I guess you feed this mutt and then he doo-doos it out and that dumb ho scoops it up. Then five seconds later she feeds it to him again hoping he won't mistake it for his own stool. I guess that's not so bad, I do that all the time.

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Ok, remember how I wrote about Mimi the cat from Brazil whose owner claims she was banged by a dog and gave birth to puppies? Scientists were called in to verify her lies and well her lies were verified.

The scientist said, “People who aren’t experts often imagine things. All the facts contradict her.”

Mimi's owner probably only did it for attention, cause she hates herself. She was selfish and made Mimi look like the skank-tramp she is, so that she can get some publicity. This doesn't change the fact that Mimi gave her bagina up to a dog. I totally believe that. Homegirl has "dog wang lover" written all over her!

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Cassia Aparecida de Souza from Brazil claims that her cat, Mimi, gave birth to puppies. Yeah, dogs. She said that three of the six cat's babies were dogs after this slut cat fucked the neighbor's dog.

A scientist is going to take samples to see if this is true.

Mimi is a damn slut-whore! What kind of cat gives it to a dog? This is not possible! If it is possible I want a cat-dog now!

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Nicole Richie is seen here taking her cat to the vet after it fell out of a building or something. Yeah, that's the story she told the doctors. I'm sure the cat's bones broke, because it hasn't been eating.

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The Queen of England herself sent a special Birfday greeting to the oldest bitch in England! Flook turned 100-year-old in cat years which is roughly 23 in human years.

Fook's owner said, "I have watched Flook grow up from a kitten and I am very proud of her. I really just sent the letter tongue in cheek and didn't expect anything back. But when I got the letter from Buckingham Palace I nearly fell over."

We wish this hot ho a special day and happy years ahead!

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