The CAPTION THIS Contest

Tonight on VH1: Behind the Cartoon, we catch up with the addictions, illnesses, and economic hardships faced by longtime couple Holly Hobby and Strawberry Shortcake. - Strepsi

Runners-up:

Here Comes Homely Boo Boo - Fruitibras

Sophia Grace and Rosie's fame peaked early. It was all downhill from the Ellen show. - bkmn

A rough economy has forced the Walmart price fairies to reconsider the definition of "low price." Additionally, it has forced Walmart to reconsider the definition of "price fairy." - Cinesnatch

via POW

How redundant. Most shoe designs already say fuck you to a woman's foot. - OurMissC

Runners-up:

How Quentin Tarantino's girlfriend broke up with him. - agirl

Looks like a pump, flips like a tweaker.... - herroyalflyness

Some people have "fuck me" pumps...me, I like my "Fuck You" pumps. - johnnysgirl

via Break

The Ugly Fuckling proved at least some of his bullies wrong by growing up to be a crooked penis. - skabazzle

Runners-up:

The last 'ride' to be removed from Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch. - RHONYC

Ryan isn't the only Gosling I'd mount. - The Real Mean Girl

Somewhere in Fuck Me Creek, California their own version of the cockmess monster surfaces. "Cocky" has recently appeared again ever since Jenifer Aniston has gotten a steady boyfriend. - Mani6

via Break

Ridley Scott unveils a still from the Prometheus sequel : these two are Michael Fassbender's dick doubles. - Aphid

Runners-up:

Every day the little people living in her bathroom sink give Amanda Bynes good advice like her hair is not big enough and her lips too thin. - TexnDoc

Lil Wayne's teeth celebrate another Everclear night. - GingeMinge

Test Dummies for Trojan's new waterproof condom prove it's super resilient for even the most talented bottoms. - RHONYC

via PIU

"All those in favour of suing Cialis, please rise." - Homeless J

Runners-up:

Hugh Jackman wasn't the first victim. - ISprainedMyUvula

Meet the sheeple. They tend to follow each other aimlessly about without knowing why. - atlantapug

In an effort to lose more weight, contents from Snooki's belly button were cleaned out and free to go. - H321

(Thanks Carolann)

Donald Trump's hair donor didn't take it easy when it was revealed he was replaced by a fox. - H321

Runners-up:

Ever since Max died, all the other pigs have been trying to get into George Clooney's home. - daisy100

This season on Khloe and Lamar, Lamar moonlights as a policeman and Khloe expresses her attraction to men in uniforms. - TFBuckFutter

They've finally captured the Sheen/Lohan mutant STI but now what to name it. - carefreea

"Not without my daughter!" says Mama June after the police finally take her away for crimes against humanity for creating Honey Boo-Boo Child. - Rutherfucker

via Buzzfeed

And in other Heat Wave of '13 news, Spencer Pratt awoke this morning to find that his dear wife Heidi had succumbed to the scorching heat after their crystal-powered AC unit shit the bed. - meeeee

Runners-up:

Kim Kardashian's OB got more than he bargained for when her Double Bubble booty implants decided to quit that bitch. - MaryJaneRottencrotch

The day Nicole Kidman went too far. - lislop

Courtney Stodden's cameo in the Bazooka Joe porn was way less scary than her roles in Lemon Head, Circus Pee-nut, or Werther's Original Ho. - Doll-Parts

via PIU

Apple waits for the school bus just like any other kid. - Ecce Homo

Runners-up:

Turnout for the 2019 Kim Kardashian Fan Club convention was better than expected. - Johnny Boy

"How dare you say I'm eccentric! tweeted Amanda Bynes from her own personal VIP section on the sidewalk. - ImpertinentVixen

via Break.com

After about 3 or 4 weeks of leaves and tree bark, the Survivor contestants usually start having visions of the Three-ply Queens mirage. - TexnDoc

Runners-up:

The angels sent to take Mister Whipple to heaven. - Spaz de la Whoreta

Yes, the same thing is pretty much on everyone's mind when they see Kim Kartrashian's ass. - NovaNightly

Baby Jesus look! The Three Wipe Men came here for you, so you can get rid of all these nasty juice traxxx caused by the holy Madonna. - icebunny

Source: Lady Bunny via WOW Report

"Well, Mr. Travolta, they're supposed to be ping-poing balls, it's supposed to be a vagina, and it's only an urban legend!" - bertice_berry

Runners-up:

There's a clear warning label on the box: bending over may result in the ejection of Kegel ball. - daisy100

It looked as though Angus would win when he broke the previous record of 60 metres. But then Richard Gere showed up with his hampster ball... - I am Legend

via Izismile