Afternoon Crumbs

Princess Charlene of Monaco wore this for Pope Francis the Fist's debut at The Vatican, but she probably wears this same outfit every day to mourn the death of her freedom - Lainey Gossip 

Nobody put Gucci Mane and Kim Kardashian together or he'll slip into a coma from stage 5 boredom - The Superficial 

29 pictures that make me either want to spend the day fapping or spend the day using the ab roller that's collecting dust in the corner - The Berry 

Brangie's child army can only speak French to her - Celebitchy

Tina Fey as Sarah Palin 2016! - Towleroad

.....and then the machine broke - Drunken Stepfather

IN THIS ECONOMY, it was very financially smart for Heather Graham to re-wear the dress she wore to junior prom in 1986 - Hollywood Tuna 

I'll finally get more servings of La Bruja, because The Real Housewives of Miami has started filming again - Reality Tea 

Rose McGowan or Chrissy Crocker circa 2006 after a blowout? - Popoholic

If you like feeling emotions, here's a story about Dax Shepard's dying father meeting his unborn baby - ICYDK

Rebel Wilson might be in The Hunger Games.... - I'm Not Obsessed

Why you should never take "kill it with fire" literally - Gawker

And here's Kelly Brook getting out of a car - IDLYITW

Um, being married to Daniel Day-Lewis is like fucking a different man every night, because he always takes work home with him - Videogum

Lindsay Lohan should've stolen a bra during her little "shopping" trip - Just Jared

Are Duchess Kate and the Cub Scouts making campfire churros? - Popsugar

The ghost of Lindsay Lohan's future and the ghost of what could've been Blake Lively's future hung out together last night and this is why L.A. is all out of vodka and the good shit today - Lainey Gossip 

When Kim Kartrashian said during her deposition that she really loved Kris Humphries, she really meant that she loved all the MONAY and attention marrying him would bring - Celebitchy

Lindsay Lohan's attorney's son is also her part-time pimp - The Superficial 

CNN should pair Elisabeth Hasselcrack with Nancy Grace so they can shriek at each other until the ozone layer bursts and ends our misery - Towleroad

Girls Aloud is over forever and ever - Drunken Stepfather

Ashley Benson carries a book and wears glasses so she can look as smart as her Mensa president boyfriend James Franco - Hollywood Tuna 

Caroline Manzo of The Real Housewives of New Jersey thinks that all men, including her husband, have wandering peens - Reality Tea 

This blood-drinking crazy from My Strange Addiction makes me miss the piss-drinking crazy from My Strange Addiction - Gawker

Jimmy Fallon might replace Jay Leno sometime in the far future - ICYDK

Jamie Foxx's daughter is all grown up and looks like this in a bikini - Popoholic

The hot pieces of the new G.I. Joe movie - The Berry 

Taylor Swift has already chosen her next victim - IDLYITW

 Some actor type named Álex González has a peen and here it is - (NSFW) OMG Blog

I want to make wall-to-wall carpet out of Damian Lewis' hair - Just Jared

Ashton Kutcher is really some super genius who is fooling us all, FYI - Videogum

BREAKING: Ben Affleck's daughter got a haircut - Popsugar

I need to slap myself for mistaking Vanessa Hudgens for Lisa Bonet - Moe Jackson 

Is Kanye styling Rob Kartrashian too? - I'm Not Obsessed

Why Naomi Campbell is the new queen diva bitch of basic cable - Crunk + Disorderly

Duchess Kate and THE QUEEN visited the tube today and I'd like to think that THE QUEEN had to slap a trick down with her pocketbook after they wouldn't give up their seat to her - Lainey Gossip 

Daisy de la Whora still exists - Hollywood Tuna 

I hope somebody gets Vincent Kartheiser and Alexis Bledel a working toilet for an engagement present - Celebitchy

There goes whatever was left of Michelle Shocked's career - Towleroad

Beyonce is so graceful that this is how she queefs - Drunken Stepfather 

Justin "Just For Me" Timberlake's new music video is really, really long - The Berry 

Stacy Keibler celebrates her contract renewal with George Clooney by working the hell out of her forehead vein at an Escada event in Berlin - Popoholic

Miley Cyrus really wants you to see that she's wearing her hitchin' ring again - ICYDK

Teen Mom Farrah can afford a new nose and new tits, but apparently she can't afford to take a cab - Reality Tea 

Maybe it's because spring has sprung and I'm seriously hard up, but Snookitina's bought-and-paid-for-piece is looking sort of hot - Just Jared

Splash was a MESS. Case in point: This made the cut and Rudy from The Cosby Show didn't - IDLYITW

I love the Rainbow House, but living in it means that you have to live across the street from Shirley Phelps - OMG Blog

Lindsey Vonn used to make fun of Tiger Woods - Celebslam

The girl in the middle is smiling to forget about all the fleas and lice that are jumping in her hair - Popsugar

Gerard Butler looks like he's about to give head to that nose piece - I'm Not Obsessed

Too $hort is still too dumb - Vibe

R.I.P. Harry Reems - SOW

Brit Brit, Normal Guy Dave and a bodyguard all celebrate with a Frapp after capturing, killing and skinning a Yeti to make those boots. Savages. - ICYDK

Prince Hot Ginge did not hold Cressida Boner's hand in front of the paparazzi the other night, which in my head means that he's 25% closer to going gay like he said he would - Lainey Gossip

Bret Michaels ruined Eva Longoria's birthday - The Superficial 

Jake Shears of Scissor Sisters serenaded the Silver Fox with that hero song from Drive and it's nice and everything, but this song is nothing without slow motion shots of Ryan Gosling walking to his car - Towleroad

Rosario Dawson and Danny Boyle, the couple that random put together, broke up and probably hate each other now - Celebitchy

Obviously, we're supposed to be staring at Joanna Krupa's nips, but I'm too busy staring at her rubber cat mask of a face - Drunken Stepfather

Jennifer Love Hewitt plays her favorite pastime: man catching - Hollywood Tuna 

Blake NotSoLively tweets a picture from her cell phone and you probably won't recognize her with a top on - Popoholic

Pimp Mama Kris actually felt a tingling on her plastic face and it was from Elizabeth Taylor's spirit slapping the Botox out of her - Reality Tea

Sofia Vergara's chichis are a 32F, FYI - IDLYITW

James Franco in Bullett Magazine - Just Jared

And this is what the restaurants in my nightmares look like - OMG Blog

Scenes from inside Lindsay Lohan's locked down rehab center - The Berry 

Robert Pattinson shaved away every last tendril from the magical unicorn forest - Popsugar

Should've happened to Michael Lohan instead - Crunk + Disorderly

Yes, Girl Scout Cookie-flavored beer exists in this world - Jezebel

Which one's David Arquette? - SOW

It's a hard knock nooooooooo - Videogum

Brandi Glanville wants LeAnn Rimes to have a few foals of her own - I'm Not Obsessed

And it has a more charismatic personality too - Moe Jackson 

(Pic via FameFlynet)

The pristine pearl that is CoCo celebrates the day she rolled out of an oyster and she does so while a black straw tries to resist the urge to motoraboat her chichis - Hollywood Tuna

Your nana and Bradley Cooper have another thing in common. Not only do they both slobber all over Victor Garber, but they both maintain their beauty with the help of perm rods  - Lainey Gossip

Well, if Mel Gibson ever starts a football team, this dude will be the captain - Towleroad

K-Wellfed's FUPA can't and won't be tamed - The Superficial 

Finally, picture proof that Jodie Marsh's precious vagine is an infinite white light of holiness - (NSFW) Drunken Stepfather

GOOPY Paltrow almost died from having a miscarriage - Celebitchy

Vin Diesel's twin looks a lot like Vin Diesel in Find Me Guilty and I can't believe I still know that Find Me Guilty existed once - The Berry 

Carnie Wilson has Bell's palsy - ICYDK

Taylor Swift is either posing in a photo shoot or she's jumping on a trampoline to look over the wall that surrounds Harry Styles' house - Popoholic

Lil Wayne is alive, but he's still in a bad way - IDLYITW

The Bad Girls Club All-Star season should take place in a quarantine tent - Reality Tea

These Miley Cyrus bikini pictures look like grainy stills from an all-chipmunk version of The Legend of Billie Jean - Just Jared

And here's Chris Pratt's waxed ass - (NSFWish) OMG Blog

This is pretty much how I react when I have to go to a wedding too - Videogum

Hillary Clinton is all for gay marriage - Jezebel

Chris Hemsworth dipped his head in a bowl of peroxide and is still hot - Popsugar

Keyshia Cole will not bow down to Beyonce - Crunk + Disorderly

Danny Boyle is seriously sucking the hotness out of Rosario Dawson - I'm Not Obsessed

Liev Schreiber saves lives! - SOW

Mark-Paul Gosselaar was a Rock of Love Bus slut before Rock of Love Bus sluts existed. I still would. - Buzzfeed

England's finest rose Instagrams a picture of the world's finest and classiest pair panties. Make sure to put on your coattails and white gloves before clicking  - Drunken Stepfather

Jessica Biel needs to take off those net pants, turn around and put them in the FedEx truck behind her, because they need to go back to the year 1997 - Lainey Gossip

Since the perforated condom trick isn't working, Jennifer Love Hewitt is going to freeze her eggs - The Superficial 

I can almost hear the pained cries from that metal ring holding Tamara Eccelstone's bikini top together - Hollywood Tuna 

Benedict Cumsinbatches sings and sort of sounds like Morrissey with laryngitis -  Celebitchy

Khloe Kardashian needs to stop scaring the Silver Fox like this - Towleroad

I really thought the first picture was of Jada Pinkett Smith - The Berry 

The Photoshoppers at Brahma Beer are still doing weird things to Megan Fox's already plastic face - Popoholic

What lezzies think of peens (sadly, they didn't ask Rojo Caliente) - OMG Blog

Jordan Catalano basically went on the GOOP diet to lose 30 pounds - Just Jared

A KUWTK producer admits the obvious - IDLYITW

I think my sister has the same pink coat as Duchess Kate, except my sister's coat is covered with cat fur, taco sauce and subway dust - Popsugar

These pictures from the G.I. Joe premiere would be so much better if The Rock wasn't wearing so many clothes - Moe Jackson 

MiserAlba is trying to be the next GOOP - Celebslam

Now if only a judge will rule that the Kardashians need to be pulled off this planet - Popbytes

But what I really want to know is what's happening to the right - I'm Not Obsessed

This is what Nick Minaj looked like after Elle ripped off her cotton candy hooker wig, pulled out her caterpillar feet lashes and dropped a bucket of water on her head - Celebitchy

The Texas T-Rex has stopped fighting the hotness for his art, but more importantly did his arms grow? - Lainey Gossip 

Something to make your genitals run up inside your body: a Pimp Mama Kris sex tape might exist - The Superficial 

Nicki Minaj's ass is a sturdy place to hold your beverage while you're lying in the jacuzzi - Drunken Stepfather

Kat Graham went blond and I've never noticed this before, but has she always had a Vanilla Ice brow? - Hollywood Tuna 

Who ever dug the popped up collar out of its grave should be dragged all the way to hell...by their popped up collar - Towleroad

Matthew Broderick and his twins look like J. Crew exploded all over them - ICYDK

Jenna Dewan should be Kim Kartrashian's maternity stylist. No, I take that back, because nothing fills my dead heart with happiness like seeing Kim Kartrashian looking like two tons of messiness - Popoholic

Maxim's offices: where time stopped in 1998 - IDLYITW

Pruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuune - Just Jared

This list of crappy celebrity tattoos is null and void without Harry Styles' tribute to Mimi tattoo - The Berry 

Penelope Cruz's pregnant ass looks good in a two piece and everything, but I'd rather see pictures of Javier Bardem in a banana hammock - Popsugar

GLAAD bans The New York Post from going to their awards show - Boy Culture 

The glitter-covered Honey Baked Ham of Atlanta finally gets his own show - Crunk + Disorderly

And after Larry King said "my place," he pulled up to a crypt - Videogum

Lil Kim is looking like my uncle in drag as Kimora Lee Simmons - Moe Jackson 

But I want to know is if this picture was taken before or after James Franco sat on that popsicle - Celebslam

Jennifer Aniston asks Charlize Theron for adoption advice - I'm Not Obsessed

The American Idol producers should've just put a bewigged Furby in Nicki Minaj's chair. Nobody would've known the difference - SOW

Ke$hit looks like a craft project Day of the Dead hooker, but when doesn't she? - Just Jared

James Franco is stoned as all hell and grabbing hard onto Ashley Benson's hand like she's holding a big bag of the good shit - Lainey Gossip 

Olivia Wilde: all the points, Beliebers: none of the points - The Superficial 

I'll give $5 to the Veronica Mars Kickstarter project if sloths play all the roles in the movie - Towleroad

Josh Brolin, Michael Fassbender and Benicio Del Toro all get drunk and circle jerk together. I added that last part, but let's pretend it's true - Celebitchy

Happy lunch time, here's a side of Whitney Cummings' bare ass - Drunken Stepfather 

And if a side of Whitney Cummings' bare ass wasn't something you were looking for, here's a full plate of Isla Fisher's wet ass - Hollywood Tuna 

If you want your magazine sales to drop into a dumpster outside Nashville, put Taylor Swift on your cover - ICYDK

Picture #24 of Glenn Close and Woody Harrelson is the picture every hipster uses as their fashion inspiration - The Berry 

This is how Salma Hayek serves leche to the starving children of the world when her chichis take the day off - Popoholic

Not pictured: Leonardo DiCatchAHo off camera with a giant net - IDLYITW

So this is where Brit Brit gets her weaves from - OMG Blog

Don't be tardy to the court room - Reality Tea 

So I guess Beyonce and Nicole Kidman started a new business together - Crunk + Disorderly

Something to make your stone cold heart break in half: a puppy in an oxygen mask - Buzzfeed

Miranda Kerr got in a car crash - Popsugar

Rolling in the smog - I'm Not Obsessed

That stupid ass annoying ass Surface tablet is infecting every corner of TV - Videogum

Scott Disick checks to see if Pimp Mama Kris ripped off his nutsack with her teeth yet - Boy Culture 

Shhh, don't say anything, but the Kimye fetus has temporarily moved into Kim Kardashian's ass before it makes its grand escape out the backdoor - The Superficial 

Screw Leonardo DiCaprio, this is the real pussy posse of Hollywood - Lainey Gossip

Is that an iPhone in ASkars' pocket or a grip to help us climb up his Swedish mountain of a body? I'm going with the latter - Celebitchy 

Lady CaCa is copying Larry Flynt now - Towleroad

Porn stars SANS FARDS - Drunken Stepfather

Halle Berry's tits made an appearance on The Tonight Show last night - Popoholic

Tamara Eccelstone's a billionaire heiress with a $2 boob job - Hollywood Tuna 

This post is like an In Memoriam for all the delicious things that died in Kirstie Alley's stomach over the decades - The Berry 

Teen Mom Jenelle quit rehab after 4 days - ICYDK

Edward Norton and his fiance made a baby together - Just Jared

There's a special place in heaven for women who tell the paps to fuck off when they ask about Taylor Swift  - IDLYITW

Gerard Butler admits to having a one night stand with Brandi Glanville, but he doesn't remember her last name - Reality Tea 

And here's 1/4th of Kellan Lutz's muscled up ass - OMG Blog

I'd like Justin Bieber a whole lot more if he traded in his 1994 beanie hat for this extra fancy Cuntier cap - Jezebel

Before she was launching Blackberries through the air, Naomi Campbell was on The Cosby Show - The Frisky 

Yet another romantic and poetic love song from Bam Margera - Videogum

Mrs. Cunningham should give John Travolta some wig lessons - SOW

Ivana Trump wears a cape made from Donald Trump's pubes - I'm Not Obsessed

(Pic via Splash)

Brit Brit shows us that a truly refined lady always holds her t-shirt dress down before she farts - The Superficial 

Ben Affleck doesn't seem that excited about nose bumping with Jennifer Garner - Lainey Gossip

The funny things that come out of Ed Helms' mouth - The Berry 

Justin Bieber's babysitters canceled his show in Portugal, because he need to suck on a pacifier while sitting in a high chair in the time out corner for a little while - Celebitchy

Judging by that certified swish, the slick-haired sidewalk bigot was totally on his way to the glory hole - Towleroad

Adriana Lima rides a bike with her ass out and face over shoulder, which is the way everybody rides a bike, right? - Hollywood Tuna 

Chrissy Teigen gets naked for Instagram - Drunken Stepfather

Kelly Osbourne is probably epileptic - ICYDK

Ashley Jizzdale supposedly tweeted a picture of her ass, but there's no ass to speak of in that picture  - Popoholic

You know it's Monday when you think Sienna Miller's baby is wearing a pixelated mask - Just Jared

The One Life to Live cast photo needs more Dorian Lord and the All My Children cast photo needs more LA LUCCI!!! - SOW

Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn about Kenya Moore's Gone with the Wind Fabulous video - Reality Tea

As Selena Gomez stares at Ashley Benson's chichis, Justin Bieber screams and cries into his wet nurse's chichis while she tries to breastfeed him - IDLYITW

Baby red pandas wrestling is the only cure for the Mondays you need - OMG Blog

Tina Turner finally gets on the cover of Vogue - Jezebel

Kelis' eye make up is very "meth junkie after a 10-day binge" - Crunk + Disorderly

Shemar Moore is the 99 Cent Store version of Leonardo DiCatchAHo - Moe Jackson

Posh's weave needs nourishment - Popsugar

That wine stain on Ramona Singer's dress was a nice touch - I'm Not Obsessed

I think I'd rather see pictures of Ken Paves in a bikini than pictures of Eva Longoria in a bikini - Cityrag

(Pic via Pacific Coast News)