Wednesday, May 9th 2007
Kelly Clarkson's album "My December" will be coming out in July despite reports that Clive Davis hated that shit and wanted Kelly to fix it. TMZ reports that Kelly told Clive that she wouldn't change a thing. Lazy hag!
Kelly is out promoting her single "Never Again" and dropped by TRL yesterday looking like Miss Piggy meets Mrs. Roper. Didn't she have a song called "Beautiful Disaster?" Well, there's nothing beautiful about this disaster.
Tuesday, May 8th 2007
First Mary-Kate Olsen showed up to the Costume Gala looking like a flock of birds attacked her and now Naomi Campbell does this? That looks like she shaved off her pubic hairs and made a dress out of it.
Tuesday, May 8th 2007
FUG ALERT! Hide your eyes if you have a weak stomach. The big-tittied chipmunk strikes again and this time at last night's Costume Institute Gala in NYC. The Gala honored the works of Poiret: The King of Fashion. Whoever Poiret is I don't think he had this in mind.
It's NYC, not Reno sweetheart! She's just a mess from head to toe. The look on John Mayer's face says it all. The tits are all sorts of wonk, the beak looks like it's been gnawed at by a rat and the hair is just......Ken Paves needs to be stripped of his license!
Monday, May 7th 2007
I hope this is a joke, because it's not funny. According to sources close to producers of the Bond movies, Amy Winhouse has been offered a role in the next film. Producer Barbara Broccoli is reportedly keen to see her opposite Daniel Craig.
A source said, "She's perfect for the role because she's the embodiment of the retro glamor of the original movies."
Unless the next Bond movie takes place in a crack house, this isn't right! Retro Glamour?! Rita Hayworth and Ava Gardner never looked like they'd pull an ass-to-mouth for an 8-ball. Her Bond girl name would totally be Ano Heroin.
Sunday, May 6th 2007
Every bit of Dylan McKay hotness that was in Luke Perry is gone. Luke was hands down the hottest ho on 90210 and now he looks like he's Rachel "Chupacabra" Zoe's twin brother! Ouch, this hurts.
Here's Luke and his botox-needing forehead at Jay-Z's after fight party at Tao Grand Beach in Las Vegas yesterday.
Friday, May 4th 2007
Behold the new Princess of fug fashion! We get it Mischa Barton, you love to look as hideous as possible. Disco is dead! It really is, but Mischa really can't let go. High-wasted, sequined pants?! What is the meaning of this! I can't even talk about the face. She was at the same event as Rachel Zoe , so maybe the life was sucked out of her.
Upon looking at these photos Liza Minnelli is going through her closet right now to make sure all her pants are in check.
Thursday, May 3rd 2007
Former "The View" co-host and all-around annoying hag, Debbie Matenopoulos, may bare all in Playboy according to TMZ . Debbie was apparently chatting up with some Apprentice chick that recently bared it for the men's magazine. The Apprentice chick is an attorney and apparently got a really juicy deal from Playboy.
Debbie was apparently interested on what she could possibly get from showing the goods.
Please don't Debbie. If you do make sure you find the greatest Photoshop artist of all-time. I mean like the effin Michelangelo of Photoshop artists! PLEASE! You know if she did Rosie O'Donnell would be rubbing the clit to that. Sorry, that was a little much.
Thursday, May 3rd 2007
Riddle me this! How does James Blunt get hot chicks? Yeah, he we heard he allegedly banged Lohan, but I'm talking about hot ones like Petra Nemcova. Look at him! He's a dirt bag. He has fleas! He needs a flea bath. I mean, does he sing "You're Beautiful" into their pussies?! WTF?!
Speaking of dirty situations, Bijou Phillips needs to rinse her "situation" out. . She looks like she JUST finished beating the world's largest gang bang record. Damn. Freshen up a bit before going out.
Both of these homeless people attended the opening of Hotel Stoli last night in Hollywood.
And I did say Hotel Stoli! Does vodka come out of the faucets?!
Tuesday, May 1st 2007
Pete Wentz opened Angels & Kings in the East Village part of NYC last night. He calls it a new "neighborhood" spot and opened it with a bunch of other douches, because he was sick of the snobby Manhattan nightlife.
One of the other investors said, "This will be a place that anyone can go and have sex in the bathroom and not get in trouble."
Yeah, remind me to never use this bathroom. I really don't want to stick my hand on a puddle of Wentz/Simpson juice when I'm flushing the toilet.
Oh and Asshole Simpson is officially the hot Simpson. It's sad, but true.
Monday, April 30th 2007
Kelly Osbourne and Amy Winehouse are calling themselves "Team Evil" due to their hard partying and hell-raising.
Kelly said, "You should watch out. We call ourselves Team Evil. We like to go around causing trouble."
Um...more like go around causing nausea! Kelly and Amy are like a before & after!
Above is Team Evil at Coachella with Amy's boyfriend.