Nicole Richie
Tuesday, July 31st 2007
Shocking News Of The Day
Nicole Richie is 4 months pregnant. DUH! She's confirmed to Diane Sawyer that she's expecting a baby with Douche Madden. The interview with Diane will air on Good Morning America this Thursday and 20/20 this Friday.
She said, "Yes, I am. We are. I'm almost four months."
This is going to be interesting. I thought skinny bones jones' didn't get their periods. Freak of nature and tiniest baby EVER! Guinness standby.
Well, congrats to these two tools! I expect a truly hideous baby name from these two and nothing less! I hope they don't let me down!
Nicole will also talk about going to the clink. "I have a responsibility and it's something that I did wrong, and if I could personally apologize to every single person that has lost a loved one from drunk driving I would. And unfortunately I can't, but this is my way of paying my dues and taking responsibility and being an adult."
Umm...yeah you can. What else do you do all day? Seriously, what does she do?!
Source: ABC News
Monday, July 30th 2007
Thankfully There Won't Be Anymore Moments Like This
E! has confirmed that "The Simple Life" has been cancelled. This latest piece of trash season will be its last. Thankfully, there won't be more idiotic moments like the one I posted above.
On last night's episode Paris and Nicole helped run an acting camp headed by the crazy Sally Kirkland. The girls decided to get "into character" by dressing as black girls. OFFENSIVE!
This is absolutely ironic coming from someone like Paris who has used the "n-word" several times. She also doesn't look black at all. She looks like a piece of orange shit! She better not wear this get-up around Britney Spears or she'll be mistaken as a Cheeto and get gobbled up.
Friday, July 27th 2007
Only 4 Days!
Nicole Richie just got 4 days in the clink for her second DUI conviction. She pleaded guilty as expected. She was also fined $2048 and was ordered back to school for 21 days to an alcohol education course. She must start serving her time by September 28th
.
Nicole is due to pop a baby in January reports TMZ
Cheap. She should've gotten at least. Oh well. I'll be surprised if she serves even 6 hours.
The head bitch also told her that if she kills someone while drunk driving she'll get charged with murder, not manslaughter. Blah blah blah...
Nicole showed up to court with Douche Madden thinking she's Holly Golightly. More like Holly Grosslightly. I know this morning I said I liked her, but now I change my mind. I know....I know...how quickly they turn.
Friday, July 27th 2007
Knocked Up In The Clink
TMZ is reporting that Nicole Richie will appear in court today and cop a plea sending her to the clink! She will apparently plead "not guilty" or "no contest" to her DUI charge. The judge will sentence her on the spot. She will most likely receive a minimum sentence of five days in jail. Anyone with two DUI convictions get a 5-day minimum. This will be the ho's second DUI conviction.
Nicole was popped last year for driving on the wrong side of the road. She admitted to smoking a little weed and taking 1 vicodin.
Nicole is smart to cop a plea. Just get it over with. You know I can't stand Lohan or Paris, but for some reason Nicole does it for me. She seems to be the smart one of these sluts. I know that's not saying much. She's laying low during this whole thing and it looks like she's ready to face up.
With that being said, I can't wait to see that baby bump behind bars! Ahahah!
Let's send her a black and white striped onesie!
Thursday, July 26th 2007
The Moment You've Been Waiting For
Ok, not really....but Nicole Richie will finally answer to pregnancy rumors on "Good Morning America." Nicole's interview with Diane Sawyer will air in two-parts on August 2nd and August 3rd. They will talk about her upcoming DUI trial, if she has a lima bean in the oven and on her relationship with Douche Madden.
Yeah, exciting stuff. She probably was getting jealous that Lindsay was getting all the attention. It bothers me that I actually get excited about these lame-ass interviews. Is this becoming a new thing? It seems that suddenly all these TELL-ALL-EXCLUSIVE-SHOCKING interviews with dumb ass sluts are sprouting up. I mean do we really care? That's a trick question.
Above is a photo from 2003 when Nicole was fugly fugly fun.
Tuesday, July 24th 2007
Who Has The Hottest Mugshot?
I know it's mean, but I couldn't help it! We're only missing Britney Spears to complete the class of 2007!
Personally, Nicole Richie wins hands down. Paris has make-up on and probably had it photoshopped and Lindsay's hurts my heart just a teensy winsy bit!
Wednesday, July 18th 2007
Bring On Maury!
The National Enquirer claims that Joel Madden may not be the father of Nicole Richie's baby. They say that there were 4 dudes in Nicole's life before she found out she was knocked up.
A source said, "Nicole recently underwent a series of tests, including blood and urine screenings, which confirmed she is pregnant."
This source also claims she will undergo paternity tests to find out if Joel is the daddy. Nicole has not yet confirmed she is indeed pregnant.
So who are the 4? Joel Madden, DJ AM, Brody Jenner and Jeff Goldblum! Ahaha...remember when she was linked to Jeff?! That would be hilarious if The Fly was the father. If those two did it, it probably did look like 2 flies going at it.
Friday, July 13th 2007
Nicole Richie Doesn't Like Turtlenecks
Joel Madden's dick must be cut, because Nicole Richie said she will only date a dude if his wang isn't wearing a turtleneck. EOG quotes Nicole as saying, "The one thing I always look for in a guy is for them to be circumcised."
Ok I'm about to get raunchy, so clothes your eyes if you're under the age of 17 or get shy when talking about dick cheese.
Turtlenecks are fine by me as long as they keep that business fresh and clean. Douche in there every now and again. I smell it to make sure it's cheese-free, because trust me when I say that nothing kills a sexy moment like a mouthful of dick cheese.
I also think Nicole doesn't like turtlenecks for technical reasons. Her ladypart is probably so small that even a little foreskin will be denied entry.
Wednesday, July 11th 2007
Another Damn Month?!
Nicole Richie's DUI trial will not start today. It's been pushed back to August 16th, because Nicole's key witness is currently on vacay with his family. TMZ reports that Nicole's witness, Dr. McGee, will challenge the drug results.
Nicole is currently in Canada, but she will have to appear in court on the 16th.
Hmmm....I bet they are doing this so that Nicole looks "bigger" in court and maybe the Judge will have a little heart and cut her some slack. Bitch is what? 12-weeks knocked up? Ugh, just let her off already and be done with it. That's what's going to happen anyway.
Wednesday, July 11th 2007
Richie Won't Be In Court Today
Nicole Richie is reportedly in Canada with her alleged baby-daddy and overall douche, Joel Madden. She will have to decide to accept a plea deal or not offered by prosecutors. The terms of the deal are unknown. Nicole is not required to be in court, because it's a misdemeanor charge. Her attorney will appear and decide whether or not to take the deal.
If she doesn't take the deal, her attorney will try and get the trial pushed back again, because their expert witness can't testify until August.
TMZ reports that Nicole thinks the drug test given to her by the cops at the time of her arrest was bogus and she's bringing in her own witness to prove it. Um...didn't she admit to taking drugs?! How the hell could her own mouth be wrong?
Take the deal Nicole, so we can be done with this hell! But she won't. Anything to keep herself in the spotlight for a few more weeks. I mean it's not like she has anything else to do. Seriously, what DOES she do?!
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