Open Post: Hosted By A Fireman And A Kitten
I didn't know it was possible for me to grow ovaries just so that they can combust, but that's exactly what happened on the inside of me after this picture of a fireman giving oxygen to a kitten landed in my inbox a dozen times. Those big man hands! That tiny kitten face! That little paw poking out! I can't even make an inappropriate joke about this (I can, but I'll save it for the next time a firefighter gives oxygen to a kitten). My heart just melted and slid out of one of my nipples.
This picture is filled with so many awwwws that it could make even the blackest heart in the evilest underworld demon (I'm looking at you, Kunty Karl Lagerfeld) start beating again. It truly is the cure for the common cunt.
Source: TOM BAUER/Missoulian via Cute Overload (Thanks to everybody who sent this in)
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Nothin hotter than a big strong man showing extra care and kindness to kewt wittle animals. NOTHING.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
I always wonder about the Hells Angels who tattooed "FTW" on themselves and if they are pissed that it now means "for the win" and not "fuck the world."
Dancing With the Stars is such a joke.
I continue to watch it, I admit, but it's pathetic.
Kirstie Alley sucks, yet the judges keep giving her decent scores because the network knows that people are tuning in to see whether she breaks Max's leg in a dip, or he dislocates his arm sockets while twirling her around on the ground.
Not to mention if she just broke her fat ass with a fall, it would make for good TV.
She's whining about how her hip hurts this week.
Well, if I was carrying around 100 lb bag of flour everyday, my hip would hurt, too.
She needs to lose 100 lbs and come back on.
I shiver with humiliation for her if she stays until the finale.
I hope DWTS has good health insurance, for Max's sake.
She has potential, she is pretty and sexy, she is just too damn fat.
Hines Ward for the win!
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"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." ~Marjorie Ingall
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Just when I think human beings are complete vermin something like this happens. This kind of thing gives me a glimmer of hope for humanity. Great story & pic.
I'm gonna go give my two kitty's a big hug.
man, Japan just got hit by a 6.4. they just ahd a 7 last week!
regarding school lunches, Jamie Oliver gave a great interview with Jon Stewart on why he was banned from the entire LA School District:
http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/thu-april-7-2011/jamie-oliver
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"Come Back As A Flower: Songs of Stevie Wonder" - w/Mimi Fox, Akira Tana and more - name-your-price download at http://tiny.cc/u5fa8
Submitted by babybunny on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 5:04pm.
I have five brand new baby kitties and they have the sweetest gestures at two weeks..with the yawning, and the paws up gesture...and all have ginormous bellies...baby kittens are off the wall adorable...
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Awwwwwwwww. I take it Mama cat just had a litter of little baby kittehs? ;)
Proof MK might have blown Zuckerberg ALLEGEDLY???? You can still post D-listed links to your FB profile page, but posts from "cuteoverload.com" are banned as offensive!
Nice work MK!
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lajuice.com - Sure people might hate me less, but where's the fun in that?
Ok, what I thought was going to end with me yelling bomb and getting arrested at the Urgent Care....I'm actually happy. Phew.
Stupid ass medical insurance still not "effective" they need the back side of my marriage certificate. RU FUCKING KIDDING? So UC wounldn't see me unless I gave them $150 deposit. Fuck that.
So I went to the Pharmacy to see if my prescription refill request went through and thankfully it had.
$15. I haz drugs.
@ precocious and fishy: I was laughing so hard at the honey badger that my kids ran over to the computer, and against my better judgement, I replayed the vid for them. They each have a bizarre sense of humour like their mum...So now that I know you two have also shared the vid with children, I don't feel so bad!
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"my brows could subtract that WTF look on your face so move along"
nomnomnom
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I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames
Well, I felt something die,
Cause I knew that
That was the last time,
The last time
-Adele
I have five brand new baby kitties and they have the sweetest gestures at two weeks..with the yawning, and the paws up gesture...and all have ginormous bellies...baby kittens are off the wall adorable...
Submitted by thegobbler on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 4:53pm.
"Oh, it's eating a BIRD?! Oh, that is just nasty!"
~or~
(from bullfrog movie)
"Fly way, bird! Oh, this is terrible!"
fishsticksfan, you are corrupting those young minds! (I showed HB to children, too. *shame*)
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"When I pass a flowering zucchini plant in a garden, my heart skips a beat."
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:55pm.
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lol "Oh, what's THAT in its mouth?"
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"my brows could subtract that WTF look on your face so move along"
Nvm
Submitted by precociousmagpie on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:55pm.
Speaking of honey badgers, on the way home just now I saw a red-tailed hawk take off with some poor creature in its talons--think it was another bird--and I actually said, out loud, to no one, "Euuuww, that's disgusting!"
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ahahahaaaa!!! I love it. I showed those videos to my little cousins they were sharing it on FB. Love your sig too. ;)
Speaking of honey badgers, on the way home just now I saw a red-tailed hawk take off with some poor creature in its talons--think it was another bird--and I actually said, out loud, to no one, "Euuuww, that's disgusting!"
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"When I pass a flowering zucchini plant in a garden, my heart skips a beat."
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:46pm.
Submitted by Slurpee on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:42pm.
*gives Slurpee a pet Honey Badger for protection*
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ha ha ha ha ha! You read my mind!
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"When I pass a flowering zucchini plant in a garden, my heart skips a beat."
Submitted by Sweetas on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:24pm.
Aw, Jack! You're just saying that so I'll put out again!! You know the routine, bag of Funyuns, a Slim Jim and a PBR and I'm all yours baby. ;)
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ahahahahahahahahahaahahahahaahahaa!!!
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Here’s to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer – and another one
Thank you Evil_Cupcake!
Submitted by Slurpee on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:42pm.
*gives Slurpee a pet Honey Badger for protection*
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:12pm.
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:07pm.
Snowy - Thing 1 went to a daycare where the parents provided breakfast and our kid went with a box of plain Cheerios and some kids had Pop Tarts or donuts with chocolate milk every morning. This was at the age of 3.
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Uvy - when Big D was in preschool, there was this kid that had McDonalds breakfast, every morning. Some days the hash browns and french toast sticks, other days an egg mcmuffing.
Every damn day.
I wonder how fat that kid is now.
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Inactivity makes you fat, not food, and not food in moderation. I eat fattening things all of the time, BUT I am an active person, and I am not fat.
Re: School lunches. When we enrolled our kids in private preschool, it bragged about the nutritious hot lunches and snacks it gave the kids.
Come to find out, morning snack was a soft buttered roll and orange juice. Lunch would be ham sandwiches, chicken soup, cucumber sticks and apple juice. Afternoon snack was rice cakes and grapes. Sounds okay, but to a nutrition nazi like me it was quite inadequate.
Very heavy on empty starches, fruit juices instead of whole fruits, empty vegetables (cucumbers are nutritional zeros) and no lean protein to speak of. High sodium, too.
Same thing goes for the "nutritious" hot lunches at my kids' grammar school.
I'm in charge of every meal they eat and will be until the absolute last moment. They get enough junk food that they don't feel deprived but I stuff them full of high-nutrient foods too.
Yes, they go through a rebellious phase where they only eat crap, but if they have a good base and education about nutrition, they will return to good eating habits.
Yeah, Im just going to make sure I always have my cell phone on me. He's been warned and threatened with arrest so I think it'll be ok.
Submitted by Slurpee on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:15pm.
Wow!! That is so creepy. Try and vary your routine a little so he doesn't know exactly where/when you are doing things and get some mace or pepper spray.
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Honey badger don't give a shit.
Slurpee - that is fucking scary!
ME- I'm HORRIFIED how kids eat here. Huge amounts of sugared cereal, processed crap, chocolate milk is the norm, chips, cookies, very little fresh fruit or vegetables. Our last three fundraisers at the kids' school have been at fast food restaurants, one held the same week as a Pizza/Bingo night.
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The physical appearance of the please makes no difference.
Aw, Jack! You're just saying that so I'll put out again!! You know the routine, bag of Funyuns, a Slim Jim and a PBR and I'm all yours baby. ;)
On the how long to get over it topic, depends on how much you cared, whether you were the dumper or the dumpee, how bad the bad times were and other factors. I'm a sentimental fool so I'll spare everyone further thoughts on it lol.
Submitted by Slurpee on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:21pm.
fishsticks:
He told them he's been watching me for months (how stupid is that?) I'm just going to be very careful from now on!
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So scary because he doesn't see anything wrong with it. :( I'm worried about you!!
fishsticks:
He told them he's been watching me for months (how stupid is that?) I'm just going to be very careful from now on!
R.E. the lunch thing
While a stupid idea there could be a few reasons. The school also might be trying to start some sort of program "look at us we're the first in the nation to have all veggie/ lowfat/whatever healthy cafateria food". Also kids notoriously trade/barter/fight/promise to kill someone for something as a stupid bag of flaming hot cheetos. Trust, I 've witnessed some nasty scuffles between third graders over a candy bar in the cafateria that would carry on into the classroom and disrupt the whole damn afternoon. Not that kids ca't sneak this stuff but I've read stories about older kids offerring little girls candy etc for sexual favors...
...
Submitted by Slurpee on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:15pm.
Regarding my creep:
Just talked to campus police and am a little freaked out - again. My building faces the University library and apparently this guy has been sitting on the third floor for MONTHS watching me come and go! Campus police told him if he ever comes near me again they will arrest him! Yikes!
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HOLY FUCK!! How do they know he's been watching you from the 3rd floor for months?!
Slurpee...can they escort you to & from? And def get the mace. How did they know he's been watching?
"not so fast tom ryan..."
Regarding my creep:
Just talked to campus police and am a little freaked out - again. My building faces the University library and apparently this guy has been sitting on the third floor for MONTHS watching me come and go! Campus police told him if he ever comes near me again they will arrest him! Yikes!
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 3:07pm.
Snowy - Thing 1 went to a daycare where the parents provided breakfast and our kid went with a box of plain Cheerios and some kids had Pop Tarts or donuts with chocolate milk every morning. This was at the age of 3.
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Uvy - when Big D was in preschool, there was this kid that had McDonalds breakfast, every morning. Some days the hash browns and french toast sticks, other days an egg mcmuffing.
Every damn day.
I wonder how fat that kid is now.
the federal school lunch budget accounts for ALL kids getting the lunch regardless of whether they eat it or not, so either way they end up paying for it even if it goes in the trash.
Growing up on nassy CPS school lunches I can assert that at my schools they made you take the freaking lunch regardless. I would dump it in the trash at the end of the line just to be a cunt and stick it to 'em. Maybe me doing this is a precursor for this banning mess?! LOL
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Shame, on me.
To need release.
Uncontrollably...
I-I-I wanna go-o-o all the way-ay-ay
taking out my freak tonight.
I-I-I wanna show-o-o all the di-ir-irt
I got going through my mind
Yeah it was great. This was the 5th date, and I've really liked him since the first.
But you know how it goes, we are trained to hold in our feelings for fear of seeming like a desperate bunny-boiler.
But (I know this sounds lame) I told him I liked him and he said he likes me too.
Kindergarten all over again at 48!
About how long it takes to get over somebody?
It's different for me every time.
Sometimes it's such a relief it's instantaneous, other times it's really bothersome even though I know it's for the best.
I usually go on the prowl for somebody new.
Not that I ever find anybody, but it does help.
That Bethenny Frankel add for her Place of Yes book is freaking me out. YES, I did complain about it yesterday and I am complaining about it today as well.
Snowy - Thing 1 went to a daycare where the parents provided breakfast and our kid went with a box of plain Cheerios and some kids had Pop Tarts or donuts with chocolate milk every morning. This was at the age of 3.
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The physical appearance of the please makes no difference.
LMAO, SWEETASSSSS!!!
to everyone - Sweetass is tiny and BEAUTIFUL.
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Here’s to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one
A pretty girl and an honest one
A cold beer – and another one
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:56pm.
I love the disCuntess!
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I love how she goes around to everyone asking what happened like LaToya. The look on her face when she's trying to scoop gossip is like an intensely hungry tiger.
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:47pm.
Is it because of a lack of health...or is it to try and combat kids from bringing in foods that others are allergic to (i.e. peanuts)?
I know some schools have peanut and peanut free-zones. So crazy to me...I never knew anyone with severe food allergies.
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Take a bow, freak. Jack-n-the-hat 10-5-2009
For what purpose was this created? A goddamn project for whore school? Sophie_003 10-6-2009
Snowy
I'm hot and cold on the disCUNTess, I don't see why she kisses Jill's ass, and i think she's a bigger whore than the show tends to tell us. Plus I'm Team Rameana all day erryday and I hate how she talks down to her!
I do think she has a great body for her age and height and like her hair :P
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Shame, on me.
To need release.
Uncontrollably...
I-I-I wanna go-o-o all the way-ay-ay
taking out my freak tonight.
I-I-I wanna show-o-o all the di-ir-irt
I got going through my mind
M.E. I know! I watch Jamie Oliver, also, the article said most of the kids are getting free school lunches cuz they are below the poverty line, so guess who will REALLY end up paying for that food? GTL and her fellow Chicagoans !
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
Submitted by Green Tea Latte on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:54pm.
Thank you fishy!
There's being assertive and being obnoxious and Alex crosses that line a lot. And Sonja is VERY laid back so it must be something rather insulting for her to publicly throw her out.
Love the preview were the Cuntess LuAnn is being thrown about atop the camel. I replay it and lol at those seconds of pure gold!
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LuAnn is a cunt but her boyfriends seems very sweet and/or good telegenic.
LMFAO @ our pic Jack!! Ahahahahaha! *swoon* I thought you looked very handsome in your dapper diaper. Did my ass make my skirt look fat? Be honest.
Snowy♥ we were talking about you!! Did you feel your privates burning? ;)
snowy - it makes no sense to me because school cafeteria food is GROSS! Processed crap high in fat, calories and god knows what else. PLUS, paying for school lunch is expensive!!
Submitted by bitchette on Mon, 04/11/2011 - 2:52pm.
add me to the whore list M.E. i can't imagine being heartbroken for months on end. *cold hearted bitch face*
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LOL.
IDK, guess I've had my heartbroken too many times in the past and I've grown cold. Who knows.
When the ex and I split up, I was dating BH about a month later. Ex and I got back together, only to split for good six weeks later, I was with BH that night.
*points at self* WHORE!
@Jilly
GIT IT! Hot mama!
@Vanitas
it depends on the guy and how much the negatives outdid the positives. for what its worth, it took me 6-9 months to completely get over a ship of two years...don't judge he was my first love.
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Shame, on me.
To need release.
Uncontrollably...
I-I-I wanna go-o-o all the way-ay-ay
taking out my freak tonight.
I-I-I wanna show-o-o all the di-ir-irt
I got going through my mind
M.E. this is supposed to COMBAT child obesity...I mean I could see their point if the school lunches were actually healthy! But it still wouldn't be right, THIS IS AMERICA DAMNIT!!!
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK