Hot Slut Of The Day!
Amelia the Cat might be the only creature on this planet that can listen to a Ke$ha song on full blast in the middle of a mental hospital playground while watching One Night in Chyna in front of a plate of blue waffles with a “Fuck Justin Bieber” t-shirt on her body and live to meow the tale, because the pussy is indestructible!
The 18-year-old cat used up a good portion of her nine lives when she fell out of a moving truck crossing over a bridge in Washington earlier this month. The fall made Amelia a little fucked up in the brains and as she tried to figure out what the hell just happened, a car hit her, causing her to fly over the bridge and fall 70 feet to the ground below. A horrified driver who watched the entire thing while making this face quickly drove down under the bridge expecting to see the spirit of the pussy with angel wings and a harp in its front legs floating above the body, but this is not what she witnessed! She found the Catwoman of cats alive and sort of well.
The cat was taken to the local Humane Society who named her Amelia because she “flew.” The vets at the Human Society were amazed that Amelia only suffered a broken front leg and a cracked palate. Sadly, they later learned that Amelia was knocked up with a litter that died from the fall. But since Amelia’s chichis are full of leche and she’s the kind of bitch who just gets up and goes with the flow, she’s nursing an orphan kitten. One of the directors at the Humane Society said, “We stuck a 2-week-old kitten in her pen. Amelia rolls over, lifts her leg up, and says, ‘Milk’s over here.’ She’s an awesome kitty.”
I would say that Amelia should join the Jackass crew immediately, but well….
And meanwhile, my dog just screeched like a virgin bottom at a plug and pass party when I brushed his hair too hard. “Now who’s the pussy, bitch?” – Amelia to my dog