Match Made In Foolery Hell

Just when you thought Lindsay Lohan was already lying at the bottom of a mountain of pathetic desperation, the moronic duffel bag of clearance bin coke grabs a shovel and digs even further.

While watching Chris Brown beat the stage at the VMAs, Blohan felt the urge to subtlety purge about her horniness for Urkel Turner by blowing him a Twatter wink:

@ChrisBrown killed it. #MTVVMAs

@chrisbrown wanna meet?

All the used kitty litter Blohan snorts when she can't afford an 8-ball has eaten every bit of dignity she had left, because bitch doesn't even give a fuck anymore. Yes, most of us scream our faces off about how this dumb fuck needs to get some sense beaten into her, but I don't think this is what we had in mind. Speaking of that, Blohan is going to be extremely disappointed when she finds out that the kind of fisting she gets into is not the same kind of fisting Chris Brown gets into.

Posted by: Michael K

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Submitted by just passing through on Wed, 08/31/2011 - 11:18pm.

why would anyone want to fuck chris brown he's ugly.

"i'm a peaceful guy with bad intentions"

charlie sheen

Submitted by Infamous on Wed, 08/31/2011 - 10:07am.

"Blohan is going to be extremely disappointed when she finds out that the kind of fisting she gets into is not the same kind of fisting Chris Brown gets into."

HAHAHAHAHAHA

www.theinfamouslife.com
www.twitter.com/so_infamous

Submitted by letinstar on Wed, 08/31/2011 - 6:08am.

the black guy did it...
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr

Submitted by panache on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 6:20pm.

I don't blame Lindsay for falling in love with CB. His performance at the VMA's was A-AWESOME. Gotta give credit where credit is due.

But I don't think he'd fall for her charms. She doesn't seem like his type. Plus he doesn't need the publicity she brings with her. He has enough of his own to deal with.

Submitted by karen on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 6:01pm.

" Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer"..William S. Burroughs

chris brown needs to keep his pimp hand strong.

Submitted by nightowl on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 5:55pm.

Lol Becky! Another reason why I want to see these two together (and not In a for publicity relationship, either) they are both teak wrecks and it will be interesting. I don't even care if Lohan ever gets back on top.

Submitted by becky n sydney on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 5:14pm.

If he punches Blohan in her duck lips, his fist will rebound off those rubber-slugs and land square on his own nose. Could be funny.

Amy

Submitted by LA me on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 5:13pm.

Submitted by parkerj on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 5:53pm.
She's a damned fool. Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if she comes out with a sex tape any day now.

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The sex tape has been out there for years.. WO has been holding out for mo money..

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Move that Lohan....I'm ORANGE CONE!!!!

Submitted by MrrKat on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 5:10pm.

Submitted by BBGemini on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:01pm. ...

BAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAA!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!!

Dammit, BBG! I spit root beer all over the monitor! :-P

Submitted by parkerj on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 4:23pm.

She's a damned fool. Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if she comes out with a sex tape any day now.

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"Bye, Whore" -MK

Submitted by hotpocket on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 4:08pm.

Submitted by Goldshift on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 5:25pm.

That's what I did, too! T-bone. Mom and two kids in the other car, went to the hospital. Not good, but nothing serious. Only good? thing were the witnesses who saw her pull out right in front of me. I just had bruises and the fat lip.

Major skid marks on the road from me trying to stop in time. I couldn't swerve without going into oncoming traffic. Makes you appreciate the 3-car following distance rule. I get PISSED when people tailgate me because they're ignorant a-holes who have no idea how far it takes for a car to fully stop.

Submitted by Goldshift on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:55pm.

I know what you mean. I never knew air bags packed such a punch until I t-boned this dumbass when she ran a stop sign.

Submitted by hotpocket on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:40pm.

Submitted by Goldshift on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:51pm.

She's just trying to save some money on lip injections.

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Ha! Good one : )

That also reminded me of a car wreck I got into, where the airbag swelled my lip up for 2 days. Anyway, too bad Ted Bundy's not around anymore. Lilo would find him charming.

Submitted by the_hot_chick on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:39pm.

Another publicity stunt.

I think she's hoping he'll hit her so she can get publicity/sympathy, and sue him for the few dollars he has. Ultimately, I see one of two things happening:

1) He beats her worse than she expects. He goes to jail. She blows all the money from the lawsuit on plastic surgery that fucks her face worse than his fist.

2) He doesn't beat her at all. She says he does anyway. He goes to jail hating women more than he already does. She blows all the money from the lawsuit on speed balls, parties, vacations, and designer clothes.

Either way, Chris Brown is not a "victim". He should learn to keep his hands to his damn self.

If he falls for this, he deserves whatever will happen to him after Lindsay makes him out to be the second coming of OJ Simpson.

As for Lindsay: I would have thought she'd go for Charlie Sheen if she was looking for a fucked up temporary meal ticket she could sue/use to gain sympathy.

Can't you just see her as one of his "goddesses"? Crazy youtube vids and even crazier tweets? Sloppy drunken public appearances and public meltdowns? WINNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It would have been great fun for the two months it lasted. Oh well.

I guess Lindsay couldn't handle Charlie's meth face. Or maybe he's too crazy for HER.

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An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.

Submitted by A.cotw on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:32pm.

Submitted by BBGemini on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:01pm.
Chris Brown
@AliLohan NO!
Dina Lohan
@AliLohan NO!!
Lindsay Lohan
@AliLohan NO!!!

Ali Lohan
Should I use my spectacles and large-buttoned phone to call the police?
1 minute ago

Dina Lohan
How dare u? My #Ginger is a STAR!! I will be telling the world about this incident tomorrow on Good Morning America!!
1 minute ago

Chris Brown
One for each freckle stain! #KickaGingerDay is everyday in my house !!!
2 minutes ago

Lindsay Lohan
Now he's kicking me in the face repeatedly. Glad my tweetin' hand is all good!
3 minutes ago

Chris Brown
@LiLO - suck a dick, domestic abuse victim!
4 minutes ago

Lindsay Lohan
#OMG @ChrisBrown punched me in the firecrotch!
5 minutes ago
+++++++++++++++++
ROTFLMAO!!!

Submitted by A.cotw on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:26pm.

Submitted by MickeyHolland on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:46pm.
Submitted by A.cotw on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:21pm
Mickey, I wasn't joking, but I'm glad your husband was amused. XD

Submitted by SANS FARDS on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:23pm.

Nothing would please me more. These two assholes deserve each other.

Submitted by almostfamous88 on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:18pm.

Oooh this would be brilliant

Submitted by MadgesVadge on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 2:21pm.

I support this trainwreck 100%.

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"I have a very poor way of concealing my dislike of people and/or things." -- Evil_Cupcake's Mom

Submitted by Goldshift on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 2:21pm.

She's just trying to save some money on lip injections.

Submitted by strange_owl on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 2:16pm.

I don't wish ill on anybody, but if this just so happened to end in murder/suicide, well, thems the breaks.

Submitted by Haribo on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 2:14pm.

Lilo clearly doesn't mind being OJd at 25.

'We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.'

Submitted by Anonymous101 on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 2:03pm.

Submitted by BBGemini on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 3:01pm.

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AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Too Funny!!
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"He had an okay body. Not fat at all. And naturally toned abs. She could pour a shot of tequila down his belly and slurp it out of his navel without getting splashed in the face." - A Shore Thing, by the

Submitted by KA on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:47pm.

Everyone here and all the other places this is posted fell right into her trap. She's crazy sneaky. She knew that just by sending that tweet out, everyone would be talking about her. Well, congrats Lindz, you succeeded.

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A baby's first words should not be: "DEATH DON'T TAKE ME NOW!!!" - MK

Submitted by LisaRose on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:46pm.

Warning Warning Will Robinson!!

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Visit my husband's webcomic DUNGEON HORDES at http://www.drunkduck.com/dungeon_hordes
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Submitted by icallbs on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:41pm.

one of the funniest tweets to a celebrity i ever read was to chris brown right after hurricane irene hit.

From Danny Zuker: Oh, God. What did you do to her? RT @chrisbrown Please pray for Virginia.

she may never win that oscar, but she sure is gunning for a darwin award.

Submitted by spankypants on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:40pm.

wanna meet...behind the dumpster?

Submitted by But.Seriously.Folks on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:40pm.

Chris Brown, please oh please, have a clue and do not fall for the okey doke. This hooker is looking for press and payoffs and a temporary sponsor. If you fuck her, she will expect payment. Ask 50 Cent.

Her desperation is really quite spectacular.

Submitted by babybunny on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:32pm.

nothing like a nice beating to stay relevant, huh Hohan..this is a wtf on so many levels it is ridic. She is pathetic, he is pathetic, so hey it might just work?? I for one avoid psychotic women beaters like the plague, but that is just me...

Submitted by BBGemini on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:31pm.

Chris Brown
@AliLohan NO!
Dina Lohan
@AliLohan NO!!
Lindsay Lohan
@AliLohan NO!!!

Ali Lohan
Should I use my spectacles and large-buttoned phone to call the police?
1 minute ago

Dina Lohan
How dare u? My #Ginger is a STAR!! I will be telling the world about this incident tomorrow on Good Morning America!!
1 minute ago

Chris Brown
One for each freckle stain! #KickaGingerDay is everyday in my house !!!
2 minutes ago

Lindsay Lohan
Now he's kicking me in the face repeatedly. Glad my tweetin' hand is all good!
3 minutes ago

Chris Brown
@LiLO - suck a dick, domestic abuse victim!
4 minutes ago

Lindsay Lohan
#OMG @ChrisBrown punched me in the firecrotch!
5 minutes ago

Submitted by TellysWorld on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:30pm.

This pleases Telly.

Give me back my goddamn HELMET!

Submitted by zomay on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:22pm.

Oh fucking please. Chris would stick it in her mouth just to shut her up. Neither one has an IQ over 90.

Submitted by RustyHooligan on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:20pm.

Submitted by BBGemini on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 2:42pm.

What's awesome is that if they hook up, she'll tweet literal blow-by-blows instead of calling the cops. Because attention is attention!

Even MORE awesome, is that he'll tweet offensive and sick crap between each punch, then later act surprised that "people misunderstood him."

Better still, their delusional mothers will each go on rival morning news shows and sling more shit...

LOL! You know them so well.

Submitted by BBGemini on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:12pm.

What's awesome is that if they hook up, she'll tweet literal blow-by-blows instead of calling the cops. Because attention is attention!

Even MORE awesome, is that he'll tweet offensive and sick crap between each punch, then later act surprised that "people misunderstood him."

Better still, their delusional mothers will each go on rival morning news shows and sling more shit...

Submitted by Dirk Diggler on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:06pm.

I'd hit both of them -- with a baseball bat.

Submitted by Jintess on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:51pm.

I thought the rumor was he hits women who give him STD's.
Yeah, Lindsay is a perfect choice for dating material.

Submitted by Deb on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:45pm.

My money says he ignored the twat, I mean tweet.

"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson

Submitted by Datura on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:38pm.

Oh, here go hell come.

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Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb

Submitted by mbar on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:38pm.

He's probably like, "I don't want this dookie ass white bitch. She nasty!"

Submitted by Dirk Diggler on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:37pm.

Where's fucking Irene when you need her?

Submitted by TBH on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:28pm.

Well it was only a matter of time before these two losers got together.

Submitted by Anonymous101 on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:27pm.

Submitted by M.E. on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:25pm.

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So mean, yet so true! Let's just hope that they won't have any poor kids that will have to endure the rubbing of daddy's defense lawyer's spawns' fat @$$es in their faces though.

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Submitted by badwolf on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:22pm.

Chris Brown got a standing ovation? Oh lord, this is exactly why I can't watch these shitfests anymore. I like Jay Z a bit more now, though. As for Lohan, the problem is if this actually happens, she'll get more of what she craves - media attention.

Between this and DWTS being a top news item, I'm wondering what could be the next sign of the apocalypse.

Submitted by M.E. on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:18pm.

Do you remember all the physical altercations between her and SamRo?

I bet Blohan and her crack crazy instigated every single one of those.

This here could be EPIC.

Submitted by KeeksHotMom on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:18pm.

But man o man, imagine the drama that could come from these two. Here's hoping he dickmatizes her or she pussy whips him, the potential gossip from this would be epic.
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they would be "that" couple. super trashy, he beats her, she gets coked out.. he comes back and says sorry and they kiss and make up. they will do community service together and the cycle will repeat till a murder/suicide occurs.

Submitted by MickeyHolland on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:16pm.

Submitted by A.cotw on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:21pm.

Salut A. Cotw! You made my hubby LOL. Somehow he didn't recognize me in your description. Anyways, in line with my distinguished fellow members I aim to surprise, so thanks for noticing.

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"It is unwise to be too sure of one's own wisdom. It is healthy to be reminded that the strongest might weaken and the wisest might err."

Mahatma Gandhi

Submitted by KeeksHotMom on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:15pm.

Thing is, she probably wants to get the shit beaten out of her. I can smell the self loathing, and it's even worse than her usual smell. She won't cry for help, but she will cry "Hurt me."

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and even he won't want to help her, and by help knock the shit out of her!!

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:13pm.

I am so tired of seeing him dressed as a cracked out toddler! Who on earth told him that is a cool look!?

Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 12:08pm.

Submitted by MissJaneTexas on Tue, 08/30/2011 - 1:21pm.
He could have done Look at Me Now with an amazing dance break a la the video.
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That is exactly what I was thinking during the entire "performance." And what was with the Garth Brooks head piece? Like we were to believe he was singing?

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"Bitch, your pancakes look fine to me."

*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-