Charlie Sheen Is Playing Nice Now

In case you missed it, below is the clip of Charlie Sheen at the Emmys last night awkwardly wishing his former co-workers at a Two and a Half Men nothing but good things for their upcoming season. Now, I’m going to tell Charlie Sheen the same thing I told a way-too-hot piece who talked to me at a bar once: You a suspicious bitch! Is this one of those What Would You Do? situations? Where’s John Quinones? See what I mean:

No punchline. No joke. Just Charlie saying nice words while using his tongue to search his upper gum area for stuck coke bits. Now I know how the cops feel when they’re interviewing Charlie in a hotel hallway knowing very well that he’s hiding a decapitated hooker, a pregnant goat and a portable crack smoke sauna in his room. After Charlie uncomfortably did step 9 of The Twelve Steps in front of millions of people, he posed for a picture backstage with his replacement Hobo Yanni.

And where was Demi Moore last night? Demi actually stayed away from a field of cameras?! Talk about suspicious bitches. Either bitch is off getting her pulled head transplanted onto an 18-year-old’s body AGAIN or unlike beard bichitos, Demi can’t fake wanting to be near Ashton.

(Image via Twatter House of the Warlock Tiger)