Ashley Greene Is Funny
Ashley Greene, or as you know her as "?????", lives inside of a glistening bubble fresh out of delusion's ass where she truly believes that the paparazzi just magically show up without her calling them and she's as big of a tabloid star as Brangelina. Ashley said in the new issue of Allure Magazine (via UsWeekly) that the non-love triangle between she, Joe Jonas and Demi Lovato was basically the Brangelina vs. Jennifer Aniston love triangle for the potty training set. Ashley headbutted the clouds as she said this:
"I'm really happy that she's (Demi Lovato) doing well. She and I never had a problem with each other, but, you know, it doesn't go away. Jen Aniston still gets asked about Angelina Jolie."
"Ashley, please tell me your thoughts on Demi Lovato," said absolutely fucking no one.
Ashley really makes hallucinating seem fun. Ashley, when you're done with that blunt of shredded delusion, please pass it here, because I'd really like to see this pimple on my chest as a third nipple everybody's getting in line to suck. Then, you can go to the section marked "HO, SIT DOWN" and get comfortable. You're going to be there a while.
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She'd be pretty if her nose wasn't fucked up.
"Ashley Greene, or as you know her as "?????"
Amen. I know WAY too much pop culture for a woman of, ahem, my advanced age and even I was like, "Who in the hell is this twat?" at which time I was forced to answer myself with "Who fucking cares?"
I don't understand what is so great about this chick. Boxy figure, bad nosejob. Obviously dillusional.
Does she realize she's in like 2 scenes per movie and has a body like Spongebob? Relax Ashley "nobody knows you" Greene
Submitted by TheBreakdown on Thu, 10/20/2011 - 3:30am.
She plays Alice, the vampire with totally useless psychic powers. It says something about her blandness that a different hairstyle makes her completely unrecognizable.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
Seriously..
WHO *is* this trick?!
I have seen the Twilight movies and I don't even recall seeing her IN it? Which trick is she in those? Is she so slathered in MAC that I miss her completely?
WTF?!
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Submitted by TrashyWilma on Wed, 10/19/2011 - 9:22pm.
Submitted by A.cotw on Wed, 10/19/2011 - 8:41pm.
Translation: Marginal talent,short sell-by date,aware of both.LOL.
I've only seen her in magazines. Ashley Greene comes across as um,striving to answer every silly question,stroke the Twilight maniacs,pose hard and make nice-nice-nice.
Yeah,desperate.
Submitted by A.cotw on Wed, 10/19/2011 - 8:41pm.
Desperate or ambitious?Ashley Greene is GORGEOUS. She seems grateful for the Twilight gig, wants a movie career, and works the scene for it smiling.
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Ambitious is busting your butt and working. Desperate is trying to latch onto anybody with fame (even if they're gay) so a pap will get the shot. She might be a nice lady. She just shows up to the second date with a U-Haul.
Who is this person?
Submitted by TrashyWilma on Wed, 10/19/2011 - 7:59pm.
An acquaintance is a good friend with somebody in a well known band. He fucked her a few times, as he's pretty much fucking somebody every night. She's desperate to be seen and called paps to photograph them going for coffee. He never really wanted to be seen with her. She's desperate for attention, needy and a social climber of the worst kind.
And I hate her nose job.
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Desperate or ambitious?Ashley Greene is GORGEOUS. She seems grateful for the Twilight gig, wants a movie career, and works the scene for it smiling.
KStew does not.Even standing up straight is asking too much of her. We see her stoned,grouchy ass everywhere. Pity.
There was a childhood photo of AG in the Allure link.That's her real nose.
Cute doggeh! Shame about the bitch holding her.
Feeler
Ashley Greene is BEAUTIFUL. But she probably won't ever be seen as anything but Alice from Twilight. So yes she will probably turn into a stunt queen.
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You really have to side clap and pucker for a piece who can stand next to a white feather and out-gay it. - MK 8/3/2011
sorry -tell me who she is again?
"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"
An acquaintance is a good friend with somebody in a well known band. He fucked her a few times, as he's pretty much fucking somebody every night. She's desperate to be seen and called paps to photograph them going for coffee. He never really wanted to be seen with her. She's desperate for attention, needy and a social climber of the worst kind.
And I hate her nose job.
"And You Are...?" is the perfect tag for this chick. Yeah, she's in a major movie, but nobody knows her name from it. We hear about her because she dates a lot of gay men, and we won't hear about her for anything else.
Submitted by WinterOwl22 on Wed, 10/19/2011 - 6:43pm.
What can I say, King is right. The whole point of Twilight is that unless you have a rich hot boyfriend to control you, your life is worthless and empty.
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
She's the very definition of a Hollywood nobody. Got a little lucky; will fade into nothingness in no time. Love how she refers to JA as "Jen."
She's an insider, you see.
beauty is subjective and i am one person who does not understand why she gets so much attention. anywhoo-i would say she probably sees herself as more Jolie than Aniston. also-didnt she already get naked for a peta ad? isnt that as bad as doing playboy?
Sinjin, talk about milking it!
I recently saw a Stephen King quote in which he compared Harry Potter and Twilight: Harry Potter is about confronting fears, finding strength in the face of adversity. Twilight is about how important it is to have a boyfriend."
I hope that as soon as Twilight 2nd part stops being shown in theatres, that people can move on and forget about it.
The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as Night Owl!
She is very pretty. no getting around that.
But she'll never be anything other than Alice Cullen.
LOL Darkknight on that holy love triangle comment. On the upside, Twilight is almost over with so now this loser will disappear along with the rest of her co stars (face it, unless your name is either Rob, Kristen, or Taylor your movie career post Breaking Dawn is looking pretty bleak now and I've seen her only starring role in Summer's Moon. If you haven't, you're doing yourself a solid.). She will either fade quietly or end up in Playboy or a poor Red Shoe Diary imitator.
Maybe if the third angle of the triangle wasn't Joe Jonas, ferchristsakes.
Submitted by WinterOwl22 :Once the Twilight series is over, she will fade into obscurity. THIS IS the last in the series right?
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Kindasorta. They're splitting the last movie into 2 parts, this one coming up is the 1st half. I was forced to see it as well :-(
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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)
She's high-school-cheerleader gorgeous and apparently about as vapid as they come. Break me off a piece plz!
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*tosses a bag of hot dicks into Jeanneee's trough* BON APPETIT BITCH! - Raul Duke, 1/26/11
Isn't she bearding for a Jonas Brother?
eeehhhhh, I can't keep track of these teenybopper slores.
She looks pretty, though, I'll give her that.
So, who is she?
I laughed really hard at MK's commentary. Hit her where it hurts (except she's too delusional to notice).
Seriously, who is she?
Submitted by sinjin on Wed, 10/19/2011 - 4:49pm.
*mumbles: I think she's pretty.
(Goes back to typing up form on old school electric typewriter, grrr.)
I think she's quite pretty, though the stench of Twilight is strong.
Didn't she just marry that creeper from American Idol? Or was that the other generic one from Twilight?
I don't understand why this girl gets even a hint of attention. She does a lot of work for playing some forgettable character on Twilight (I was forced to see the 2nd one).
Once the Twilight series is over, she will fade into obscurity. THIS IS the last in the series right?
The poster formerly known as Snow Owl formerly known as Night Owl!
What? Girl go to the back of the bus with this bullshit....no one is checking for you nor Demi Lovato
MK - fabulous commentary!
"Ashley, please tell me your thoughts on Demi Lovato," said absolutely fucking no one."
SNARK!
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Dark-sided!
I wonder if she sees herself as JA or AJ.
*mumbles: I think she's pretty.
(Goes back to typing up form on old school electric typewriter, grrr.)
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"You're ugly and your fucking bag is ugly too."--John Galliano (allegedly)
Lovely girl-she should give KStew lessons.
damn what a cunt:
And I find that I'm extremely attracted to ambition and wit. If it was appropriate to date Michael Sheen, I would, but he and his girlfriend [Rachel McAdams] are so cute
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
I think she's pretty, but dumb bitch is dumb.
MK- that post was hilarious start to finish
Hahaha beb...
No YOUR dog is precious:D
The one she's holding looks like he would rather turn around and bite her, then choke her with the collar he's wearing than pose for a picture with her.
At work, I have an inmate who constantly calls me Demi Levato. Crazy asshole.
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You dumb bitch, I am home.-MK
Oh, you weren't talking about my doggeh. Carry on.
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"Taylor has an unfair advantage. Bitch never has to buy lube since her eyes are greasier than the peen of the lone top at a gay orgy." - MK
Who is this girl?
Submitted by mike on Wed, 10/19/2011 - 4:22pm.
Submitted by Jintess on Wed, 10/19/2011 - 4:27pm.
Yes, he's one of the things that keeps me going. He's a little shit (literally and figuratively; see Justin Beiber post), but I could never get mad at him.
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"Taylor has an unfair advantage. Bitch never has to buy lube since her eyes are greasier than the peen of the lone top at a gay orgy." - MK
GAH! I.HATE.HER!
Especially that fucking whack ass nose job!
That IS a cute pup! He looks pissed though.
Not an attractive dog holding it, though.
She also said she would be dating Michael Sheen if he and Rachel weren't such a 'cute' couple.
Is she a member of the January Jones club or something?
mike: She's a Twilighter
Who?
Cute doggie!
GOD BLESS THE JONAS GREENES!!! Hmm, doesn't have quite the same ring to it. Oh well. Soon she'll go the way of Beiber and whoever else the idiots pay attention to nowadays.
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A beauty that makes abuelitas pray for our sinful souls is my kind of beauty. -MK 9/12/11
YAAAAAAASS! -Sage Khia
she's from Twilight
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"Basically, Murlonio means "from Rob's ass" in Dumfuckanese." MK
"WE ARE THE TRIFECTA OF HATE ENTER THE TRIANGLE." Sucky 6/14/11
Blasphemy. How dare she compare her Z list romance to the holy love triangle?
"I'd really like to see this pimple on my chest as a third nipple everybody's getting in line to suck."
That makes quite a visual. *voms as I pass the Proactiv to MK*
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"Taylor has an unfair advantage. Bitch never has to buy lube since her eyes are greasier than the peen of the lone top at a gay orgy." - MK
I've never heard of this person in my life.