Hot Slut Of The Day!
The monkey in the doll face hat from last night's episode of The River
So last night was the premiere of the show that ABC has been shoving down our eye sockets almost harder than NBC has been shoving that Smash shit down our eyes sockets. The River is sort of like Blair Watch (the sequel) meets Paranormal Activity meets The Jungle Book meets (hopefully) your mouth over a bong. I watched it sober and I do not recommend it. Snort Twinkie cream or freebase a Starburst or something. If you don't, it could be a work of pure comedy like it was for me. ABC kept warning our adult eyes that it'll make us scream through our assholes, but it just made me laugh. Like the part (SPOILER-ISH ALERT) with the monkey in the doll face hat. The main hos are walking through the jungle and they hear a little girl crying. They spot what they think is the little girl crouching on the ground, but when they get closer, it's really a doll face on a monkey's head. COMEDY! Those bitches started screaming like they just saw a SANS FARDS Jocelyn Wildenstein, but I would've been looking around to see if I accidentally stumbled into Lady CaCa's Monster Ball. I mean, why is that monkey wearing a doll face hat? Who does it think it is? The other monkeys are like, "THIS BITCH thinks it's doing couture now."
I bet this is what it looks like after Kim Kardashian lures a dude into her cave. Kim's plastic face pulls back and her real beast face comes out to suck the life out of her victim. Well, since I put it that way, maybe this shit is scary after all.
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"I bet this is what it looks like after Kim Kardashian lures a dude into her cave. Kim's plastic face pulls back and her real beast face comes out to suck the life out of her victim. Well, since I put it that way, maybe this shit is scary after all."
*Sputtering* LOLOLOL!! MK, priceless as usual - I've missed stopping by.
Submitted by Sandbitch : Am I the only one who thinks the wee monkey resembles little Mason Disick Kardashian?
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It will resemble Kloeeeeee's (sp?) more :-D
Thanks for that, Michael. Guess I watch NBC too much because I had no idea about The River. Of course, I missed both Smash and The River.
Appreciate the laugh out loud recap though. What about Smash? was it any good?
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Amnesty International
Shine a Light
Submitted by Ms.Fit on Wed, 02/08/2012 - 12:51pm.
God I hope Sandbitch pimps this out!!!!
---Holy photoshop, 107 frames in that monkeyfucker. See you around Easter, lol.
Am I the only one who thinks the wee monkey resembles little Mason Disick Kardashian?
God I hope Sandbitch pimps this out!!!!
Submitted by sinjin on Wed, 02/08/2012 - 10:58am.
TRUTH!
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"When I'm ready to get off, I'll get off"
I love that GIF..... want it!!!
Didn't see the show, so meh.
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"When I'm ready to get off, I'll get off"
The first hour was ok. I liked the character development, but the second hour was snooze-fest time. Even though those dolls were creepy.
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I've written a letter to MK...saying...I...love...youuuuuu.
that was some scary assed Aphex Twin shit!!!
That IS gloriously creepy. I gotta google me some pics of Kanzi the bonobo to wash that image away!
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I'm here to kick ass and drink tea. And I'm all out of tea.
LOL I loved that part in the show.
I actually REALLY enjoyed the show too. It's just fun and has it's creepy moments :D
Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Wed, 02/08/2012 - 11:14am.
Haha! They very well could have been. Our school let her be a cheerleader. And I was on the volleyball team and they put a girl on there that was well over 300 pounds. I guess my high school was worried about a discrimination lawsuit, or something.
ETA. She wasn't black..just ugly and werid. Lol.
Submitted by PrettyHateMachine on Wed, 02/08/2012 - 9:16am.
Sorry, I didn't watch..but that's a monkey? I went to high school with a girl who looked like that things twin sister.
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LOL! My mom went to school with this girl who lived in a tree. Maybe they were related?!
@LaChaylo0 Lurves you too *hands over baby butter cream niece*
DAMN YOU, MK!
I seriously almost shot my screen and screamed!
WTF?!
Snipe that!
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Facebook: Triston Negreaux
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Monkeys are creepy little fuckers. I dislike them for their bad manners of throwing feces and masturbating for oranges.
Clowns too. Same reasons.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
*cowers in corner*
*cries uncontrollably*
As an Anthropoly DM, we really delved into the rhesus monkey experiments from the 70s. They started off by responding somewhat well, but soon developed hyper-sexual and way aggressive personalities. They will eat your face!
I quickly changed my concentration from Bio Anthro to Forensic. I'd much rather hang out at the Body Farm with deadies than worry about psycho monkies. Between that and the new adaptation of Planet of the Apes, I'm terrified of them.
And that li'l kid monkey is pure creeps. I'm terrified of monkeys, jack-in-the boxes and creeky tricycles.
But Project X makes me bawl as much now as when I saw it when I was 5.
"A candle loses nothing of its light by lighting another candle."--catholicschoolgirl
Way creepy!
Whaddayamean premiere last night? I checked the usual sources where "stuff falls off the truck" on the internet and i'm downloading the pilot and episodes two and three as i type this.
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You got a lot of money, but you can't afford the freeway
OH MAH GAH EVEN THE CHIMPS HAVE ALTS!
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So, my advice is you can’t make a ho a housewife. Don’t try to reinvent the wheel. Let her do what she born to do: ho. Yeah. HO. Punk bitch.
I'm a total wimp so this is plenty scary to me. MK I think all that weed smoking put your brain in a permanent "Hahahaha" mode. I can't even look at Joan Rivers, I'm not watching this!
FUCK ME! (Runs off and hides under bed)
PS I fucking hate dolls and I fucking hate monkeys.
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Wyle E
"understand that a slow red panda who nibbles pickles and does somersaults in the middle of a dancefloor is entertaining to a 7-year-old... " MK.
Sorry, I didn't watch..but that's a monkey? I went to high school with a girl who looked like that things twin sister.
that is soo fucking creepy but why cant i stop looking.
*refuses to look @ it AGAIN* tooooo creepy.
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Submitted by DirtyWhoreMouth on Sat, 06/11/2011 - 9:32am.
It's ok to be a redneck by the way.. just don't yell git 'er done because we all hate that.
I HATE monkeys, like if I ever see monkey I've always said I would run it over with my car and keep going. Yea, PETA, I said it. They're creepy, unpredictable and too "human like". Plus they are capable of chewing your face and fingers off.
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"I was half a virgin when I met him!"
-Mean Girl,Regina George
Submitted by suckandfuck on Wed, 02/08/2012 - 8:01am.
OH GOD HELP US JESUS
god and baby jesus help us!!!
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DARK SIDED
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McGill Class of '97
*swoon* at DWM... such a BITCH! by Jack-n-the-
Ba-Buttons, my dad's dog is a poodle, and she's awful. Only really loves and listens to him. She hates me, so I would believe in the monkeys riding poodles apocalypse.
EC, I still love your evil and delicious buttercreaminess.
Monkeys are hot. Or it you're a Monty Python fan, Minkeys are hot!
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www.charitywater.org
www.theanimalrescuesite.com
www.modestneeds.org
I gave this show a shot, but got annoyed with the "try to scare you every second with something or someone jumping out at you" schtick. This was the only freaky part.
Wtf.
I LOVE monkeys.
Sorry, but I like evil.
Did anyone else watch? I didn't get to. I don't want to invest the time like I did with the early days of "Lost", only to end up frustrated and disappointed. dlisted reader reviews appreciated.
P. S. Thanks Sucky, now I've got that old lady's voice stuck in my head! Hey now!
eeeeeekkkkkkkkk!
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"The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it." --
Roseanne Barr
Submitted by LaChaylo on Wed, 02/08/2012 - 8:29am.
Monkeys ARE evil.
It's going to be the monkey apocalypse.
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Lol!! I think there is a chance of monkey apocalypse but they are currently only fifth on the apocalypse list:
5. Monkies
4. Poodles
3. Monkies riding poodles
2. Machines (a la The Terminator movies)
1(b). Zombies (slow)
1(a). Zombies (fast)
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Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Thu, 01/19/2012 - 11:56am.
Liver spotted hand
Groping while I cry inside
Merit badge and meth
Monkeys ARE evil.
It's going to be the monkey apocalypse.
Ahhhrrgh, at least it's not a clownface! No, seriously, there's more charisma here than with those wooky-wook KartrAsshians! LOL!! Get on that E! Maybe it'll murder KK's ass! CHOMP!
"What is that strange clear liquid dripping out of my eye?" MK
That thing is creepy-fabulous! Should have been a baby clown mask for a clown/monkey mash up freakout.
Love, Mabel
creepy little fucker....
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"The English are horrible and Oprah is a moron." 01/10/12 the refined Brit, clairey claire
I HATE monkeys and that thing is fucking creepy.
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I have never loved life so much.
Fucking hell. I'm too sleep deprived and high strung for that shit.
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Try to be original, like the Colonel Sanders (may he rest in peace with his secret spices and shit). - urmomma
LOL at Michael K putting the SPOILER ALERT ........ at the end. Oooh, better erase what I just saw and read!
I TiVo'ed this and really hope to like it. I will watch when I can. I want something to be as good as "Lost".
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www.dungeonhordes.com
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Monkies are evil. There, I said it.
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Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Thu, 01/19/2012 - 11:56am.
Liver spotted hand
Groping while I cry inside
Merit badge and meth
That's some freaky shit.
OH GOD HELP US JESUS
god and baby jesus help us!!!
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Submitted by stinkbutt on Mon, 03/29/2010 - 5:47pm.
suckandfuck, do us all a favor, and hang yourself. Oh, and your parents should be shot for raising a disgusting pig like yourself.